TOO FAT POLKA (She's Too Fat For Me)

by Ross MacLean and Arthur Richardson


Here's a silly ditty, you can sing it right away
Now, here is what you say
So sing it while you may
Here's a silly jingle, you can sing it night or noon
Here's the words, that's all you need
'Cause I just sang the tune:

     Oh, I don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     I don't want her, you can have her,
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat
     She's too fat
     She's too fat for me

I get dizzy
I get numbo
When I'm dancing
With my Jum-Jum-Jumbo

     I don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     I don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat
     She's too fat
     She's too fat for me

Can she prance up a hill?
     No, no, no, no, no
Can she dance a quadrille?
     No, no, no, no, no
Does she fit in your coupe?
     By herself she's a group
Could she possibly
Sit upon your knee?
     No, no, no

     We don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     And she's too fat for me
     But she's just right for me
     We don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     Yeah, she's too fat,
     Much too fat
     But she's just right for me

She's so charming
And she's so winning

But it's alarming
When she goes in swimming

     We don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     But she's just right for me
     So I sure want her, you can't have her
     She's just right for me

     But she's too fat!
     She's not too fat!
     She's just right for me!


She's a twosome,
She's a foursome
If she'd lose some
I would like her more some

     I don't want her, you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat for me
     I don't want her you can have her
     She's too fat for me
     She's too fat
     Much too fat
     She's too fat for me
     Hey!

_________________________

Copyright 1947 Shapiro, Bernstein and Co., Inc. (published by Francis
     Day and Hunter Ltd.)

Significant Recordings:
1. Best-selling record by Arthur Godfrey with the Too Fat Trio
     (Columbia DB 2397, 1947)
2. The Andrews Sisters with Vic Shoen and His Orchestra
     (Brunswick 03841, Decca 24268, 194?), re-released on the LP
     "Best of the Andrews Sisters, Vol. 2"
3. Frankie Yankovic, on the LP "25 Polka Greats, Vol. 1" (K-Tel
     NC 420, 1971)
4. Frankie Yankovic and Drew Carey, on the CD "Frankie Yankovic
     & Friends: Songs of the Polka King" (Cleveland International
     Records, 1996), re-released on the CD "Besta Polka" (Musicland
     Group, Inc. 2621-10499, 1996)

Note: The voice of dissent is omitted in the Yankovic recordings.  Jay
     Richards writes in "Big Babes and the Blues" (
Buf, March 1986):

     Years ago some clod wrote a tune called "I Don't Want Her, You
     Can Have Her, She's Too Fat For Me."  A saxophonist in a
     touring band gained acclamation ... by getting up at the song's
     end and singing,


Send that fat babe to me, Buster,
The heftier she is, the happier I'll be.