Involved in real life ..

[BothGunsBlazing]

Soo, who here has been in an actual relationship where feeding/intentional gaining for you or your partner was something that was actually part of it.

I've noticed a lot of men from this website and others say that they've never gotten the chance. I mean, women too!

I guess it's rather difficult to find some one to actually take the fantasy and make it a reality. I was lucky because in High School I began dating a girl who actually fantasized about making a guy bigger and this is before I even considered this sort of thing. Her fantasy was really interested actually, she was quite the dom in that well, she was on the track team in High School and she got off on the idea of making a guy fatter and more out of shape while she remained athletic and what not. I was strictly an FA at the time though, but it didn't take much convincing from her to get me to try to gain weight.

She took a few before pictures of me and .. and bought me a mini fridge to keep in my room. Serious business. She'd measure and weigh me whenever we got to see each other (she eventually went off to college, so it was becoming more sparse) I guess in all that time we spent together I gained like 80lbs and of course I have a few after pictures of that too. :) I went from 190lbs to 270 or so. It was crazy intense and it sort of became an addiction for a while. I don't think I've ever really felt bold enough to talk about this experience before and definitely never bold enough to post those pictures, but figured I'd shoot off about this so maybe there could be some interesting discussion on here.

After we broke up due to a few reasons, I met my first feedee girlfriend. She actually was some one I met online who liked bigger guys .. but it didn't take long before she told me about her own desires. We met after about a month of talking and hit it off .. became a relationship and well, yeah, she started piling on the pounds because she felt so comfortable around me, she just let herself go.

I think one of my favorites memories was going to see her cheerleader or whatever at a basketball game after we'd been together for a few months. She had gained at least 25lbs and already being chubby, I can tell you that outfit did not fit. Every time she'd raise her arms, her belly would be spilling out between her top and her skirt. Hottest.thing.ever. I felt pretty proud of myself. Of course we did the whole before and after pictures thing .. weighed .. measured .. etc .. all in all she went from about 180 to 265 in the time we were together. I actually lost weight though, because in her fantasy she was bigger then her boyfriend so she could feel more dominant, so there ya go.

I am going to shut up now, but I could actually go on for a while, cause that was def. not my last relationship involving such things. If I can get permission, I'll see if I can post her before and after pictures and maybe I'll post my own.

Sooo .. yeah .. anyone .. Bueller .. anyone .. ?

[Ample Pie]

Another member and I had a brief relationship (we're still super good friends) that involved the feeder/feedee aspects of our sexualities/personalities.

In fact, it still colors our friendship. When we get together now, even as just friends, we like to eat--or, well, he picks at his food and glories in how much I can and do eat, always encouraging me to eat more.

I love that he enjoys it.

Personally, I wouldn't mind finding another relationship wherein we can further explore that aspect of ourselves. The problem is that it is rare and can sometimes be a rather long term thing if you're hoping for weight gain/results.

[BothGunsBlazing]

Yeah, I don't know. I don't think I need to be in a feeder/feedee relationship to function since I've had my share outside of it .. I think I just am not one to turn down the prospect. What can I say? I like big girls and if one wants to get bigger .. well, yeah, I'm not going to complain much.

oh and just so there is no mistake .. www.bothgunsblazingishawtnfat.com .. take the tour, look around. $10 to join. kthx.

[Daknee]

Soo, who here has been in an actual relationship where feeding/intentional gaining for you or your partner was something that was actually part of it.

I've noticed a lot of men from this website and others say that they've never gotten the chance. I mean, women too!

I guess it's rather difficult to find some one to actually take the fantasy and make it a reality. I was lucky because in High School I began dating a girl who actually fantasized about making a guy bigger and this is before I even considered this sort of thing. Her fantasy was really interested actually, she was quite the dom in that well, she was on the track team in High School and she got off on the idea of making a guy fatter and more out of shape while she remained athletic and what not. I was strictly an FA at the time though, but it didn't take much convincing from her to get me to try to gain weight.

She took a few before pictures of me and .. and bought me a mini fridge to keep in my room. Serious business. She'd measure and weigh me whenever we got to see each other (she eventually went off to college, so it was becoming more sparse) I guess in all that time we spent together I gained like 80lbs and of course I have a few after pictures of that too. :) I went from 190lbs to 270 or so. It was crazy intense and it sort of became an addiction for a while. I don't think I've ever really felt bold enough to talk about this experience before and definitely never bold enough to post those pictures, but figured I'd shoot off about this so maybe there could be some interesting discussion on here.

After we broke up due to a few reasons, I met my first feedee girlfriend. She actually was some one I met online who liked bigger guys .. but it didn't take long before she told me about her own desires. We met after about a month of talking and hit it off .. became a relationship and well, yeah, she started piling on the pounds because she felt so comfortable around me, she just let herself go.

I think one of my favorites memories was going to see her cheerleader or whatever at a basketball game after we'd been together for a few months. She had gained at least 25lbs and already being chubby, I can tell you that outfit did not fit. Every time she'd raise her arms, her belly would be spilling out between her top and her skirt. Hottest.thing.ever. I felt pretty proud of myself. Of course we did the whole before and after pictures thing .. weighed .. measured .. etc .. all in all she went from about 180 to 265 in the time we were together. I actually lost weight though, because in her fantasy she was bigger then her boyfriend so she could feel more dominant, so there ya go.

I am going to shut up now, but I could actually go on for a while, cause that was def. not my last relationship involving such things. If I can get permission, I'll see if I can post her before and after pictures and maybe I'll post my own.

Sooo .. yeah .. anyone .. Bueller .. anyone .. ?

First off thanks for sharing your expereinces. My experience really did not envolve weight gain as intricate as yours. When I meet my girlfriend at the time I was 187. I was up from 170 and struggling with my inner desire to gain with what I thought the "norm" was or should be. That weight seemed to just happen and when I meet my then girlfriend I was in fact dieting trying to regain my 32" waist. Long story short she love me for me not my physical self. We went to dinner alot, deserts included. She cooked wonderful meals and treats for me. Before long I weighed 205 pounds and a 38" waist. Not once did she ever comment on me gettng fat. Although for me this was a good thing because of my insecurities about getting fat. In hind sight I think she liked chubby men, an encoureger of sorts. She herself remained in shape and in fact trimed down a bit for one New Years Eve dress she wanted to wear. For me it was a good thing my tux pants had and adjustable waist band. That relationship only ended because she had to move back to ILL for a, could not pass up career move. We remained great friends and I was thinking of ways for me to be able to move to be with her. This was just not in the cards, she has since passed on due to an illness. Do not feel badly for me. I'm grateful for the time we did have together and thankful to her for allowing me to be able to like and accept myself as a bigger man.:)

[ThatFatGirl]

Here's my story. Sorry it isn't a positive one.

My first relationship was with a feeder/FA. He was the first man to ever show any interest in me whatsoever. I was 28, a virgin and pretty much felt like a freak who would remain one forever. I had no interest in feeding or gaining at all, but could not resist the attention I received from him. I went along with all kinds of feeding games (sensual sort of play to funnels & tubes). Eventually I was able to find it within myself to express my interests and the feeding play became far less extreme, to eventually non-existent. The relationship lasted for years, on and off.. really far too long for many reasons. I regret that I went along with something that felt degrading and non-humanizing to me. I would tell myself it isn't so bad because the sex that followed was so good... and aside from all of this, I enjoyed him as a person and friend. I spoke about this relationship (and many, many other things mind you) with my therapist for two years, but could never bring myself to tell her about the feeding/gaining encouragement aspect because I found it too shameful, which pretty much makes talking about it a waste of time. :)

If I had been a person with healthier self esteem, I don't think the relationship would ever have begun. It's hard to say if we'd be friends even. Looking at the entire thing, it's rather convoluted and crazy. I could probably discuss this further with a therapist (and likely should).

Exploring your sexuality is a wonderful thing, just make sure you're really exploring your interests and not compomising your spirit and self in the process.

[Ample Pie]

Exploring your sexuality is a wonderful thing, just make sure you're really exploring your interests and not compomising your spirit and self in the process.

I think this is wise advice no matter what the kink, fetish, preference, or sexuality of the people involved. Well said.

[BothGunsBlazing]

Here's my story. Sorry it isn't a positive one.

My first relationship was with a feeder/FA. He was the first man to ever show any interest in me whatsoever. I was 28, a virgin and pretty much felt like a freak who would remain one forever. I had no interest in feeding or gaining at all, but could not resist the attention I received from him. I went along with all kinds of feeding games (sensual sort of play to funnels & tubes). Eventually I was able to find it within myself to express my interests and the feeding play became far less extreme, to eventually non-existent. The relationship lasted for years, on and off.. really far too long for many reasons. I regret that I went along with something that felt degrading and non-humanizing to me. I would tell myself it isn't so bad because the sex that followed was so good... and aside from all of this, I enjoyed him as a person and friend. I spoke about this relationship (and many, many other things mind you) with my therapist for two years, but could never bring myself to tell her about the feeding/gaining encouragement aspect because I found it too shameful, which pretty much makes talking about it a waste of time. :)

If I had been a person with healthier self esteem, I don't think the relationship would ever have begun. It's hard to say if we'd be friends even. Looking at the entire thing, it's rather convoluted and crazy. I could probably discuss this further with a therapist (and likely should).

Exploring your sexuality is a wonderful thing, just make sure you're really exploring your interests and not compomising your spirit and self in the process.

Well, thank you for sharing your story. Yeah, I'll admit the problem with most feeder/feedee relationships is that it usually is one sided. I could probably go on for a while about what I really think of most feeders and what not, but I don't want this thread locked. :D But, yeah, negative and positive experiences should be shared and hopefully no one will feel the need to tear some one down.

I am sorry you were taken advantage of in such a way. :(

I remember talking to this one guy when I first arrived on this whole scene who told me the best way to find a girl who would be willing to gain weight is to find a fat girl with low self esteem. It was probably the most depressing thing I'd ever heard ..

[Daknee]

Many people, no matter what human catagory they fall into, have self esteem issues. I believe too, all people have some degree of esteem issues as well. My point really is for other people to take advantage of this is appalling! :mad: That Fat Girl, I'm sorry some scum came into your life at a time when you were most vulnerable. I'm happy to hear your self esteem is better. Because of my experience mine is too. I am very grateful for this forum to be able to share thought and expereinces. It have been very helpful for me to know there are others out there that feel and think similarly to me :)

[ThatFatGirl]

Many people, no matter what human catagory they fall into, have self esteem issues. I believe too, all people have some degree of esteem issues as well. My point really is for other people to take advantage of this is appalling! :mad: That Fat Girl, I'm sorry some scum came into your life at a time when you were most vulnerable. I'm happy to hear your self esteem is better. Because of my experience mine is too. I am very grateful for this forum to be able to share thought and expereinces. It have been very helpful for me to know there are others out there that feel and think similarly to me :)

Remember I said the whole thing was very convoluted? It really was. I don't consider this man scum because I was a willing participant in everything. Some might call both of us scum because he was married. I didn't mention it in my original reply because it wasn't really relevant to the feeding aspects of our relationship. I don't want to derail the thread with the topic of infidelity. I can talk about it in another thread if someone wants to start one, but I'd rather not go there. I'm not proud of it. It haunts me actually now that I am married to someone I truly love, who means so much to me.

Did he take advantage of me at the beginning? Maybe, but what developed was a whole other animal really. We were friends too. OK, where's the number of my therapist?

I hope the rest of the posts here are more positive. I worry a little for women who identify themselves as feedees and hope that they're not in a situation like I was in, but I have to not put my low self-esteem issues onto these other women.

[LillyBBBW]

I've told this story before. If you've read it already turn back now.
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I was dating this guy I met through some friends. He was much younger than I and attended one of the local colleges on a basketball scholarship. We really liked each other but between his schedule and my ambitions to be an opera diva we seemed to never have time for each other and the times that we did spend I was a total bitch. I was constantly on diets and fasts trying to lose weight or maintain weight loss to fit into my operatic costume. I was Amneris in Aida, a part too low for me to sing but I wanted in so badly I took the part anyway. All this caused so much stress that I took it out on everybody and my mouth always tasted like tin.

After the last show and the cast party I'd had a few glasses of wine and called his cell. I slurred on about how glad I was that this f&*^ing show was over and that I was going to eat the shit out of the next pizza I saw. I told him to come over at noon the next day so we could pig out and watch Jackie Chan movies all night. I told him to bring bring ice cream, M&M's, Cheez-its, Chips-Ahoy and some other stuff I can't remember. I was only joking with him but the next day he showed up at my apartment at 11:47 a.m. with hands weighted down with groceries and yelled, "Praise the Lord!"

We had a blast. The boundaries were completely gone and I ate till I was sick, then ate again. We spent practically the whole weekend on my couch with me grubbing down and him fetching the napkins and taking out the trash. I spent almost all summer gaining defiantly and my mother was calling him 'the shadow' because he was always around or would turn up where I was. Dayum, I sooooo liked it. At that time I'd never even heard of a feeder before. I would look in the mirror at my naked fat body and think, "FUCK yeah!" My belly and thighs were what really amazed me. For the first time in a long time I felt like a woman and not just some hybrid human trying squeeze into a square that will make people like me. We would go grocery shopping and had a private game going on who was going to look in our cart to see what we had. Each time it happened we would giggle and he'd reach around me, squeeze my belly and kiss me on the lips. *sigh* He was so hot.

The stint was brief however. I panicked when I realized how much weight I put on and new auditions were coming up in August. I went back on the diet and became very uptight. Regimented and disciplined, very critical and condescending. Everything in the world insulted my intelligence and unfortunately my bf was not interested in going down that road with me again. He dumped me right before July 4th. Damn. He was cute too.

In retrospect I always figured that like me he never knew anything about feederism or that he was a feeder but he probably did and just never said anything. Who knows?

[troubadours]

happily in one right now.

before i met dan, i was really insecure about my body. he didn't reveal his feedery desires to me until a good few months into our relationship, and with good reason. honestly, when he told me, i wasn't weirded out or anything, the idea intrigued me, made sense to me.. after checking out the weight room here and reading some stories, i couldn't wait to try it out for myself.

i'll never forget the first time, either. dan came up to stay with me, and brought a few boxes of chocolate filled cookies with him :eat2: he started off slow, trailing cookies across my lips, breaking them apart, letting my lick the filling off of his fingers... :blush: i LOVED it. since then, we've done plenty of hot stuff... i enjoy being tied up and teased or feeding myself while we do other stuff. i mean it changes depending on my mood, but it's always something i'm in the mood for in one form or another.

to give this some perspective, when we first started, i weighed 180 lbs - the first time i'd been under 200 for a long time. now, a year later, i'm up to 220, so i guess you can tell i like it. i've never been more comfortable and happy with how i look (i am, however, so jealous of you ladies with excessively chubby cheeks... something i still haven't been able to achieve yet :() it's thrilling to look in the mirror and see myself growing.. or trying on clothes and feeling them clinging in places they never used to. i love feeling bigger, seeing that i take up more room on trains. it's not something i plan on stopping, and i'm glad i've got someone to share with :D

[exile in thighville]

Here's my story. Sorry it isn't a positive one.

My first relationship was with a feeder/FA. He was the first man to ever show any interest in me whatsoever. I was 28, a virgin and pretty much felt like a freak who would remain one forever. I had no interest in feeding or gaining at all, but could not resist the attention I received from him. I went along with all kinds of feeding games (sensual sort of play to funnels & tubes). Eventually I was able to find it within myself to express my interests and the feeding play became far less extreme, to eventually non-existent. The relationship lasted for years, on and off.. really far too long for many reasons. I regret that I went along with something that felt degrading and non-humanizing to me. I would tell myself it isn't so bad because the sex that followed was so good... and aside from all of this, I enjoyed him as a person and friend. I spoke about this relationship (and many, many other things mind you) with my therapist for two years, but could never bring myself to tell her about the feeding/gaining encouragement aspect because I found it too shameful, which pretty much makes talking about it a waste of time. :)

If I had been a person with healthier self esteem, I don't think the relationship would ever have begun. It's hard to say if we'd be friends even. Looking at the entire thing, it's rather convoluted and crazy. I could probably discuss this further with a therapist (and likely should).

Exploring your sexuality is a wonderful thing, just make sure you're really exploring your interests and not compomising your spirit and self in the process.

I feel bad you had a negative experience with a feeder, and I don't mean to criticize the thoughts or actions you took during something personal that's not really any of my business. You know more about what took place than I do, but judging by your summary here a few things raised my eyebrow:

"Eventually I was able to find it within myself to express my interests and the feeding play became far less extreme, to eventually non-existent."

If you're with someone who has this fetish, there wasn't any will to compromise? standing firm on the "degrading" parts and indulging your partner to an extent that he can be satisfied without you feeling a loss of dignity? I'm just saying, I'd hope in a happy relationship marred by a weird fetish that things don't just go from 100 to 0, like maybe you couldn't find a happy middle ground, i'm just saying, from what you wrote, it sounds like an extreme tug-of-war between his interests and your disinterests without any understanding of seeing eye to eye. obviously you spoke up when you finally felt comfortable asserting yourself but think how disappointing it could be to find out from your partner that the things you've been doing he found wonderful were just a lie...such a lie you want to stop them entirely instead of toning it down.

"I regret that I went along with something that felt degrading and non-humanizing to me. I would tell myself it isn't so bad because the sex that followed was so good... and aside from all of this, I enjoyed him as a person and friend."

If the sex that followed was really as good as you said, again, you never got into the aspect of indulging him because you saw what a turnon it was? i mean, like i said, there's a big jump from putting chocolates into someone's mouth and rubbing their belly to tubefeeding and name-calling. i find it hard to believe that someone could find the "milder" aspects of feederism to be "nonhumanizing." i understand your self-esteem was poor at the time, but have you considered the idea that you overly judged yourself in retrospect? maybe you weren't dehumanizing yourself at all...or maybe just a little. everyone in a relationship has to compromise in some respect to make their sex lives work, and you were mostly feeling freaky because your partner's fetish was so obscure that it must've seemed like rock bottom just because there was so little literature on it at the time? i could be dead wrong on this, maybe he really did degrade you, but you said you enjoyed him as a person and a friend, so i'm assuming the only thing degrading about him was the perception of what he asked you to do.

do you think you might've felt better about doing what you did knowing what a community there is about feeding now, that other women here participate in it and discuss it, that it's viewed as more equal and mutual now than some kind of power exchange between someone desperate for affection and a partner taking advantage of their willingness?

i mean, i'll be frank...if you don't want to be called piggy or tube-fed and your partner makes you anyway, that's pretty degrading. but there's so many baby steps in between that and not participating at all that i'd like to think someone else as disinterested in the fetish as you these days could have a dating experience with a feeder and maybe dislike it or feel weird but not feel completely dehumanized by the experience.

[TS Monkey]

My girlfriends always know about my fantasies, but since they usually don't share them it becomes a teasing topic of conversation instead of something to engage in. Though that hasn't stopped them from gaining weight anyway, just not intentionally and not very much (ironically, my last girlfriend wasn't very happy with my influence on her waistline, but ended up gaining way more after we broke up than when we were together).

Though I've found with every girl I meet, even if they don't have any interest in gaining, they all get a kick out of the fact that I'm an FA and think that my feeder tendencies are more cute than creepy. So that's been nice!

[exile in thighville]

happily in one right now.

before i met dan, i was really insecure about my body. he didn't reveal his feedery desires to me until a good few months into our relationship, and with good reason. honestly, when he told me, i wasn't weirded out or anything, the idea intrigued me, made sense to me.. after checking out the weight room here and reading some stories, i couldn't wait to try it out for myself.

i'll never forget the first time, either. dan came up to stay with me, and brought a few boxes of chocolate filled cookies with him :eat2: he started off slow, trailing cookies across my lips, breaking them apart, letting my lick the filling off of his fingers... :blush: i LOVED it. since then, we've done plenty of hot stuff... i enjoy being tied up and teased or feeding myself while we do other stuff. i mean it changes depending on my mood, but it's always something i'm in the mood for in one form or another.

to give this some perspective, when we first started, i weighed 180 lbs - the first time i'd been under 200 for a long time. now, a year later, i'm up to 220, so i guess you can tell i like it. i've never been more comfortable and happy with how i look (i am, however, so jealous of you ladies with excessively chubby cheeks... something i still haven't been able to achieve yet :() it's thrilling to look in the mirror and see myself growing.. or trying on clothes and feeling them clinging in places they never used to. i love feeling bigger, seeing that i take up more room on trains. it's not something i plan on stopping, and i'm glad i've got someone to share with :D


you too, piggie ;)

[Ivy]

I have been in relationships which involved actual feeding/gaining in real life.. but I've been in more relationships that involved feeding/gaining roleplay.

both situations are indefinitely satisfying.

[Ample Pie]

Personally, I'd like to find a good balance of both.

I have been in relationships which involved actual feeding/gaining in real life.. but I've been in more relationships that involved feeding/gaining roleplay.

both situations are indefinitely satisfying.

I'll keep looking :D.

[AnnMarie]

I hope the rest of the posts here are more positive. I worry a little for women who identify themselves as feedees and hope that they're not in a situation like I was in, but I have to not put my low self-esteem issues onto these other women.

I think your story may not be the norm, but I'm sure others have fallen into the "I just want to please him/her" trap and ended up doing things they don't really feel totally comfortable doing - that could be any type of sexual activity/speech/actions, etc. I know I've been there, not in feeding, but with other things. I've allowed things to be done without knowing what I was really feeling when it was happening.

Anyway, my point is that it's a common pitfall and I don't think it's anything that's specific to feeders/feedees, and I think your last sentence was really insightful and I'm glad you shared it... we each have to own our experiences and not assume that someone else is making mistakes/being coerced, those are lessons we all must learn on our own.

The girls I know who are into gaining or just feeding alone are there FULLY on their own, and feed themselves if there isn't someone around to do it.

[AnnMarie]

happily in one right now.

before i met dan, i was really insecure about my body. he didn't reveal his feedery desires to me until a good few months into our relationship, and with good reason. honestly, when he told me, i wasn't weirded out or anything, the idea intrigued me, made sense to me.. after checking out the weight room here and reading some stories, i couldn't wait to try it out for myself.

i'll never forget the first time, either. dan came up to stay with me, and brought a few boxes of chocolate filled cookies with him :eat2: he started off slow, trailing cookies across my lips, breaking them apart, letting my lick the filling off of his fingers... :blush: i LOVED it. since then, we've done plenty of hot stuff... i enjoy being tied up and teased or feeding myself while we do other stuff. i mean it changes depending on my mood, but it's always something i'm in the mood for in one form or another.

to give this some perspective, when we first started, i weighed 180 lbs - the first time i'd been under 200 for a long time. now, a year later, i'm up to 220, so i guess you can tell i like it. i've never been more comfortable and happy with how i look (i am, however, so jealous of you ladies with excessively chubby cheeks... something i still haven't been able to achieve yet :() it's thrilling to look in the mirror and see myself growing.. or trying on clothes and feeling them clinging in places they never used to. i love feeling bigger, seeing that i take up more room on trains. it's not something i plan on stopping, and i'm glad i've got someone to share with :D

Great post! And colorful. :)