Should I tell my girlfriend?

[LalaCity]

She doesn't know I'm a lesbian.














Hee hee ok sorry i'll stop now. figured we needed one gag thread to properly inaugurate the new board.

Come to think of it, this could be a good place for posting your queer humor, if you like :D

[Melian]

I thought you were trying to get a version of this thread onto every board.

There is still time....

Food board: Should I tell my girlfriend...that I secretly want to each nachos out of her buttcrack?

Fashion board: Should I tell my girlfriend...that underwear are worn under the pants?

etc

[LalaCity]

I thought you were trying to get a version of this thread onto every board.

There is still time....

Food board: Should I tell my girlfriend...that I secretly want to each nachos out of her buttcrack?

Fashion board: Should I tell my girlfriend...that underwear are worn under the pants?

etc

I really think this is a good idea...Hyde Park -- should I tell my Congressman? He doesn't know that I'm an illegal alien who successfully voted for him twice -- in one election.

[Cors]

Haha! A queer jokes thread, or a wittiest comeback lines thread would be great.

I can just imagine my (thin male) partner's friends finding me on Dims and freaking out. "OMG YOUR SKINNY GIRLFRIEND IS DROOLING OVER QUEER BUTCH/BEAR BELLIES ON A FAT ADMIRATION SITE!!!!"

[Weeze]

Holy crap.

Best Thread Ever.

[butch]

She doesn't know I'm a lesbian.














Hee hee ok sorry i'll stop now. figured we needed one gag thread to properly inaugurate the new board.

Come to think of it, this could be a good place for posting your queer humor, if you like :D

True story-

the last man I dated, when I broke up with him I told him I had finally realised that I was a lesbian (not true, I knew I was queer already, but I wasn't 'out'), and furthermore, I had feelings for one of our fellow co-workers. His response? "Can we still date?" Uh, what part of "I AM A LESBIAN" do you not understand?

[Melian]

True story-

the last man I dated, when I broke up with him I told him I had finally realised that I was a lesbian (not true, I knew I was queer already, but I wasn't 'out'), and furthermore, I had feelings for one of our fellow co-workers. His response? "Can we still date?" Uh, what part of "I AM A LESBIAN" do you not understand?

Haha...wow. That reminds me of an episode of Futurama where they all get trapped on the ship at the bottom of the ocean, and Fry meets a mermaid. He falls madly in love with her, but when they are about to have sex he realizes that she has a tail and no legs, thus, no vagina.

So he runs away screaming, "why couldn't you have the fish parts on top and the girl parts on bottom?!"

Ok, not quite the same thing, but I think I've made my point :D

[JiminOR]

Food board: Should I tell my girlfriend...that I secretly want to each nachos out of her buttcrack?

Worst nacho cheese ever!

me - "That's nacho cheese"!!!

her - "yes it is baby, it's all my cheese"

[mergirl]

Butch..the same thing happened to me..kinna.
My last Proper Boyfriend was when i was 15. I dated him for about a year and a half and only cause he had a green mohawk and liked the band 'babes in toyland'. First i told him i was bi (cause i thought i was). and he said:
"cool, can we have a threesome?"
Eventually i realised i wanted to go out with a woman and said to him..actually sorry i'm gay.. and he said
"cool, can we have a threesome?"
The moral of this is that when you mention anything to do with women having sex with other women, men drop their brains slightly south of their navels.

And Lala..i feel your pain! My girlfriend doesnt know i'm a lesbian either.. she just thinks i'm a REALLY bad hetrosexual!

x

[Cors]

The moral of this is that when you mention anything to do with women having sex with other women, men drop their brains slightly south of their navels.


This only applies if you are young and femme! Most straight guys seem to feel threatened by masculine women.

[mergirl]

oh yeah..at the time i was young and femme..well kinna.. i wore suits to school.. Actually you think he would have guessed.. anyway, I think that might be an interesting idea for a post..who gets the rougher/easier deal butches or femmes.. i can think of examples for each.

[butch]

oh yeah..at the time i was young and femme..well kinna.. i wore suits to school.. Actually you think he would have guessed.. anyway, I think that might be an interesting idea for a post..who gets the rougher/easier deal butches or femmes.. i can think of examples for each.

I know, with that guy, he should have figured it out the first time we went to see a movie. he wanted to go see some Michael Douglas film (and I loathe Michael Douglas), and I wanted to go see GI Jane so I could drool over Demi Moore with a shaved head.

[mergirl]

haha.. another idea for a post..'when SHOULD they have known'.

[thatgirl08]

I really think this is a good idea...Hyde Park -- should I tell my Congressman? He doesn't know that I'm an illegal alien who successfully voted for him twice -- in one election.

Hahahah. I seriously just died at this.

[CleverBomb]

I really think this is a good idea...Hyde Park -- should I tell my Congressman? He doesn't know that I'm an illegal alien who successfully voted for him twice -- in one election.
Reminds me of that female right-wing pundit who managed to vote at each of her two residences in the '06 election... which booblehead was it?

-Rusty
(out of memory error)

[LalaCity]

Reminds me of that female right-wing pundit who managed to vote at each of her two residences in the '06 election... which booblehead was it?

-Rusty
(out of memory error)

What, you mean Ann Coulter? She's actually being investigated for voter fraud, at the moment.

Incidentally, back when I first started posting on these boards, I was taken to the woodshed -- quite rightly -- for joining in on an "Ann Coulter is a man" bash-fest. A few of our trans-gendered posters made me aware of how nasty and homophobic that kind of humor is (you'd think I could have figured that out on my own...right? :doh:). Needless to say, I was ashamed for having taken part. Sad thing is, liberals -- who should be the last people to engage in this kind of "humor" -- still make this homophobic joke on a regular basis-- just google "Man Coulter," etc., and you'll see.

There's obviously plenty of ways to hate on La Coulter without sinking to that level.

[The Orange Mage]

Completely off-topic here, but I've been itching to write some erotic right-wing fanfiction in which Ann Coulter and one of the guys from FOX News (to be decided upon later) try to stop the Clintons and Kennedeys from stealing Ronald Reagan's corpse. Meanwhile, they also try (and fail) to resist eachother. At the end, it turns out Raegan isn't dead, and he singlehandedly scares the liberals away and is re-elected president.

And the target audience is assumed to feel absolutely nothing during the sex scene(s), but blow a massive load when they realize Raegan is back from the dead.

[chicken legs]

wow.....lol.....wow what an ending...i didn't see that coming.

[prickly]

neither did reagan.