View Single Post
Old 04-08-2009, 06:39 AM   #37
Ruffie
 
Ruffie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Saskatchewan Canada
Posts: 1,703
Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by krismiss View Post
It looks like a few people touched on it, but I think there's another step too. Accepting it, liking it, and then accepting and becoming COMFORTABLE with the fact that you like it.
It seems like a lot of people can be ok with the idea of a fat person not being uncomfortable with their body, but actually *liking* it? Honey, you're going to have to really defend and stick up for yourself in that battle. Are you ready for it? Time for the big girl pants.
I think this is my biggest issue now. I think i've always LIKED being fat, but it's taking me time to accept the fact that I like it. I feel like not only as a fat person, but as a female in general, that society expects me to be this calorie-counting, poring over vogue, WISHING I could be thin enough to fit into Chanel, obsessing about becoming "perfect."
I think this is the hardest part of the journey. I only have one "real life" friend that i've been open with about my weight and she just doesn't get it. We go out and she obsesses over what she eats, and I just eat what I want. I eat what I want. She knows about Dims, I've shown her around. I've explained everything under the sun. She still doesn't understand. So, how do you get around it? How do you explain, "Well, Actually I don't want to lose weight. Thanks"?
That's the hard part. You're not just defending your body anymore, you're at a point where you're not only defending your body but also defending your interests and WHO YOU ARE.
I am a big girl. I like being a big girl. I got excited as all hell when I noticed I was developing hips. Now, how do I defend myself?
With her its her issue not yours. And she may not even really be putting it on you so much as she is herself. Lead by example, living your life to the fullest as a big person and she either will get it or not.
For me with people who don't get it I just stand my ground and say this is who and what I am. I have always been a big persona, and that is a part of my identity just as being a caring and loving person, a artist, a mom, a dedicated worker and great friend is part of me. And I have come to realize that most often it is THEIR own issues with themselves and their body issues that come into play when they advise you. I don't defend my right to be just who I am I just live it. I had such a friend who always has a diet for me every time she sees me and after talking with her and trying to get her to see my point she just doesn't get it at all. She is inflicting this damage on her kids which makes me even more mental so I limit contact with her so as not to flip on her and destroy the friendship my husband has with her hubby and her. I just took myself out of the equation. In my opinion if someone cannot accept who you are inside and out then I move on.
__________________
Teach without expecting. Give without wanting. Nurture without possessing.
Ruffie is offline   Reply With Quote