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Old 04-14-2009, 09:59 AM   #54
JMNYC
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 645
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Originally Posted by goodthings View Post
I am not yet close to being at the point of acceptance. I hope to one day get there, but as of yet I hate my body most days and cannot find too much about it that makes me happy about being fat. I do very much want to accept myself but am not sure how to get there...
I will share something personal with you...

In the same way an alcoholic abstains from drinking or a gambler from placing bets, I abstain from picking on my body in any way. If NO time is spent examining and criticizing my body, my face, my nose, that alone creates space for at least a modicum of self-acceptance. I'm not going to get into it here, but it is something I have struggled with since very early childhood, beginning with two family members' declaration of war against my then-pudgy 7-year-old body.

I am also accountable to two people---"I have been abstinent since March 10." And they ask me, "How's it going? Still abstinent?" I say yes...

Not easy, but easier when you commit to it and tell others of your endeavor.

It's been 5 weeks for me and the difference is remarkable. Just like pulling a nail from the paw---the absence of hate for the man in the mirror is like night and day. No, you don't become a big-headed bastard. On the contrary, I am just like anyone else. Not a model, not perfect. Just me, as I am. I eat well. I exercise daily. I wear the best clothes I can. I wash the face, file the nails, keep decent. I'm doing my best with what I have, which is all anyone can ask of me.

Try it for even a day. See how long you can do without remarking on your belly, face, legs, hair, age, weight. Or, if you catch yourself doing it, say, "Whoops! There I go!" and STOP.

Make sure you tell a friend or two, and tell them to ask how it's going.

Not meant in any way to tell you what to do or suggest you be different...just felt moved to share, having been there.

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