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Old 02-20-2014, 06:52 PM   #14
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 11
QuadSeekers can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesQuadSeekers can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes

Originally Posted by Yakatori View Post
A) Actually, as you develop more relationships with different types of people, you will tend to find that it's not so abnormal for a partner to be curious about your past. Maybe-even the biggest difference across a range won't be how much they want to know (at what level of detail), but how patiently and subtly they will go about acquiring that information.

B) People like to think of themselves as being broad-minded. But many of us have hard-limits. Or preferences. This definitely includes: Fat girls who mainly go for skinny guys. Or black guys who're really into white chicks. Or black women who would prefer to meet a black man. Or older guys into younger women. Or people of whatever religious background that have some flexibility, but just outside of that. Or people who (in the context of a relationship) care about things like politics or money or whatever.

Sometimes, in certain things, it's like-attracting-like. In other cases or areas it's the opposite. Or it makes no difference. And it's often quite variable from one person or area to the next.

And there's really just no way to tell (definitively) until you ask. Even then, you're operating on the premise that they're at least comfortable enough, with you, to be perfectly honest? And, also to mention, there's a difference between being open to something just-in-principle versus a real willingness to 'give-it-a-shot.' Versus whatever pattern has taken place over the course of most of a person's life.

C) Living in a particularly integrated part of the country (as we both do), it can be very easy to forget or lose sight of this. But, if you travel a few hundred miles south, say, towards a city like Memphis; you might have an easier time noticing the resiliency of some of these lines. Especially well-between either end of the extremes in wealth & social-class. And how there's, kind of, this sense of a "point-of-no-return" being at work when it comes to crossing them.

It can be deeply personal-stuff for some people. And perhaps not something to be so cavalier about if you don't know them too well. Which is why I don't think anyone's too off base to take it personally, should that kind of question be the wrong tone....or in the wrong context. Or with the wrong words.

But, as to just the question-itself, just consider how awkward things might get should either person assume the wrong thing about the other. Better to get that kind of problem out of the way, sooner than later, I think. So as not to put any undue stress on what could otherwise be an amicable, albeit very brief, relationship

D) Mhhhm...what's up with these alpha-enumerated lists?
I've always wondered how some white people justified bizarre race obsession in their heads....and now I know
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