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Old 02-22-2014, 10:00 PM   #36
Yakatori
Hard to say, really...
 
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: "Empire State of Mind"
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Default The light at the end of the tunnel may be your own....

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigmac View Post
"...I believe its more of a problem for guys who have more conservative or traditional careers....example...more pressure on district attorney's to conform to social norms than there is on public defenders.."
I think well-before you actually choose a career, the ground-work of your own personal values has long since been laid. So much that whatever type of job or career you have is somehow a reflection of that. Conformity, even if just conformity-just-for-the-sake-of-it, being one of several possibilities. Or just one's own relationship with a parent's or grand-parent's values, goals, or traditions. And here, I think, birth-order probably comes somewhat into play in order to help to decide just how far outside the margins a person ultimately ventures.

Quote:
Originally Posted by FatAndProud View Post
"...the higher a man's social status and prestige, the less likely he is to...because of social expectations and fear of losing what he has acquired..."
I'm not too sure about that. Just-intuitively, my first instinct would be to look at it from the completely-reverse point of view: That is, the more middle-of-the-road or just-average you are, in terms of what you have and your general approach to things, the less inclined you will be to do anything that really breaks with convention. Conversely, the further you are at one extreme or another (i.e. wealth versus poverty, brilliance or mental-infirmity) the less you really have to lose. And the more inclined you might be to take certain types of risks.

But; and hopefully this is obvious-enough by now; what I think is even more important than any of that is how this is all just, sort of, like letting yourself off of the hook. Not owning your own role in how certain types of people will or won't respond to you. Because, as it's so easy to forget, you are 50% of every relationship you create.

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigmac View Post
"Regarding the down low issue -- this is a problem."
Yeah, it is. But also, perhaps, in some ways that not all of us are so ready to admit. In as much as it makes for a ready-made excuse. To just explain away certain behaviors & reactions or, sometimes, a lack of responsiveness; without really any serious examination of how both sides are contributing towards and perpetuating the dynamic.
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