Thread: FA Frustrations
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Old 01-16-2015, 10:10 AM   #15
Join Date: Apr 2012
Posts: 32
YoJoshua can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesYoJoshua can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes

Originally Posted by Tad View Post
This will overlap somewhat with lower self-esteem, but only in part: some fat people really prefer not to be noticed. Presumably because their experience is that being noticed brings bad things more than good things. This will tend to result in clothing and general fashion choices meant to camouflage and fade, rather than to stand out and reveal. Not good for FA that want to see those fat bodies, but it may be making life less stressful for the person inside the clothes.
I have found this to be true as well. There was a woman I knew who deliberately "kept herself at a high weight" because when she did, men looked right past her, and that's how she wanted it. When she lost weight and men started coming at her with sexual energy, ie "I would tap that" she didn't like it. She also said being fat was a way to make people get to know her, to "look past" her body. I don't think she had an idea that there were guys who would like her BECAUSE of her high weight. This was a long time ago, and one person doesn't represent everyone but it was illuminating for me personally. Everyone always makes blanket assumptions about why someone is big but there are so many, many different nuances and reasons, some biological, some emotional, some sexual, or all the above.
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