Thread: FA Frustrations
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Old 02-03-2015, 08:40 PM   #56
Yakatori
Hard to say, really...
 
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: "Empire State of Mind"
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Default ^Well, at least that's not without some self-awareness...

Quote:
Originally Posted by magodamilion View Post
"Someone needs to develop some type of Pick Up Artist advice directed at women because no one ever seems to consider the problem of women who have no game at all.... I have no idea what they're looking for..."
I don't think anyone actually, credibly, hits on someone else without some basis of attraction. Even if for some type of opportunity or material benefit that doesn't really have so much to do with just that person themselves.

But so what? If someone is (just-initially) attracted to you? Or, conversely, that it does not (so readily) appear to be the case? Or you to them? That's not what really matters or should, to you.

I say, instead of getting hung-up on the issue of whether or not someone is responding to you, or how, or what it means; it's better to more immediately concentrate on who they are. Getting to know them, their attitude, their point of view. Where they are coming from and where they're headed. What their own personal story means to you, aside from anything beyond the most immediate connection. I mean, why are you attracted to them? If you even are...

Once you get a better handle on these types of things, and just with respect to that specific person; then, maybe, you're a little bit inside their head. Then you can more meaningfully interpret the nuance in whatever it is they're putting across. (If there's even any substance to it at all; or, perhaps, maybe more than you can realize just straight-away.)

Of course, I don't really mean anything about withholding your own feelings: Like, I don't mean, per se, that you shouldn't tell someone (or otherwise telegraph) how much you really like them. Or, conversely, how you find them, sort of, shy or aloof. By all means, relate those types of things whenever or however you feel most comfortable with it. However, I do mean more about just about yourself, holding yourself back from projecting too far into any kind of situation, in what expectations you set up for it.

Likewise, I donít really mean anything about patience, about giving people more of your own time or attention than they actually deserve. If youíre not getting something out of an exchange in proportion to what you feel you put into it, I think that should speak for itself. Just be sure itís not yourself, your own instincts, youíre losing patience with.

As then, in that case, maybe it's time to re-calibrate a few things, outside of the situation-itself.
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