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Old 08-01-2015, 03:35 PM   #26
lucca23v2
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Default this will be a bit long..sorry

Let us make an example. Let's say that you are married to the BBW of your dreams. However you decide that you need a surgery that is elective, but will increase your life span and maybe give you a better self esteem except that as a result it makes your penis bigger. You know from the start that your wife loves your penis the way it is. You also know for a fact that your wife does not like a big penis. She now has no sex drive because she does not like your penis and no longer wants to have sex and can get turned on by you, but you are still head over heals in love with your wife. This is a decision you chose for yourself because it gives you more self esteem and prolongs your life, so it is best for you in the long run.

Since according to you...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jakub View Post
Sex is one of the basic instincts that needs to be satisfied, without it you will end up with depression and poor quality of life. I know that because I've been there.
(which is not true, many couples do live without a sexual component to their marriage and are quite happy)

You will be completely ready to let go of the love of your life over something you have no control over?

Or according to your other advice...

Quote:
Originally Posted by jakub View Post
From my perspective only options for you are: open relationship, divorce...or do nothing (and be miserable). This sounds harsh but try to face it and turn off emotions for a moment - do the math and decide.
You would be ok with her having sex with someone else, let him fulfill her sexually, or get divorced because you can't hack that you can't make her happy in bed?

I seriously doubt any of these options would sit well with you. And I would bet money that you would be hurt that the person you love and the person who committed to love you through good and bad, sickness and health is now leaving you because of a health situation you can not control.

You say that you were in that situation.. were you married with kids?

IMO.. When you fall in love with someone you love the person, the physical may draw you to that person, but you fall in love with who they are.. not their tasty candy coating. That to me is being shallow. If the candy coating is what you love, then you need to go back and truly learn what love is. JMO..

*****Just as a disclaimer...I know there are good reasons for divorce and I have no problem with people in an open relationship/marriage. If it works for them, more power to them. (I am too jealous for that sort of thing, but that is my hang up not anyone else's) No judgement on my side.******
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