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Old 04-13-2016, 07:10 PM   #100
squeezablysoft
 
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I've had these same thoughts myself as a bi/pansexual (I'm attracted to ppl all over the gender spectrum but am reluctant to apply the pan label to myself, because most ppl don't understand it, and to me "pan" meaning "all" kind of carries an implication of being open to sex with ANYONE i.e. no standards or preferences of any kind, gender or otherwise. Not saying I think pansexual ppl are like that, but that is just the mindfeeling that I get from the word. In my case it is complicated by the fact that I am also genderfluid. So I have this same since of day-to-day variability with my gender identity as I have with my orientation.

Sometimes I'm a straight girl. Sometimes I'm a lesbian. Sometimes I'm a straight dude. Sometimes I'm a gay dude. Often times I feel like my ideal self and/or ideal partner is, for lack of a less offensive term (if one exists can someone help me out with it?), a shemale (female presenting person with male genitalia). On the Kinsey Scale I'm about a 2 sexually/physically but a 4 romantically/emotionally. But a combo of bad experiences with men in my family and growing up in a homophobic family and culture most likely clouds the waters at least a bit, were it not for those things I would prolly be closer to a 3 both ways.

Physically it's interesting, that I prefer a more feminine appearance in both sexes (long, lush hair on the head, no hair anywhere else, rounder, softer shape, etc) but actually strongly prefer penis over vagina. I think (some) girls are beautiful, and I think I'd feel most comfortable and secure and loved in a same-sex relationship, and I get off to lesbian porn on the reg, BUT hard dicks really turn me on whereas I really can only get excited about a pussy if I imagine that I have a cock to penetrate it with. Like girl/girl arouses me but mainly just because of the touching going on, but it doesn't really feel particularly SEXUAL to me unless there's a penis involved somewhere, if that makes sense.
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