Thread: FFA question
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Old 02-08-2017, 04:49 AM   #19
MrSensible
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That's a really good and interesting point, agouderia. Funny enough, as introspective as I tend to be on this subject, I've never really thought about the differences between my perceptions on being fat and those who became fat later in life. I've known several people who became fat post-childhood and, just like you observed, they have nowhere near the amount of hang ups about it that I do -- heck, my dad is a perfect example of this. He could walk around a crowded shopping mall in his whities and no shits would be given, heh. I think I forget sometimes just how crucial those formative years are on influencing who we become. Being harassed more or less on a daily basis, while you're trying to grow into yourself, takes its toll, to say the least. I still carry some of that shit around.

In response to the OP, I would have sooner believed Arnold Schwarzenegger could legitimately give birth (god, what a weird movie premise) via Danny DeVito than to think there were girls who liked fat guys. I'm only kind of exaggerating; it was honestly about that alien a concept to me at the time. Looking back on it, I remember a girl in Junior High who I was told had a crush on me and a fat friend of mine, so I guess she was probably the one and only in-person experience I've had with an FFA. Even then, I would have never guessed she liked us for being twice the size of our peers. It wasn't until I stumbled upon Dims that the reality of fat admiration dawned on me. That's interesting since I was very familiar with men being attracted to chubby/fat women. But women liking fat guys? Get the fuck outta here. It was a liberating discovery and I don't think there's any chance I'd be nearly this happy, emotionally-contented, and fulfilled if I hadn't come here and experienced that acceptance first-hand. And of course, met the most amazing woman I've ever known

All I would say to an FFA on the verge of a prospective relationship is to gauge the situation and be patient if the BHM seems to be taking things slow. If he grew up fat (as many of us did), chances are he will be harboring a sizable amount of emotional baggage and it can take some time to get through it. I'm definitely not saying that you should jeopardize your own wants and feelings in the process, nor that you should feel obligated to wait months or even years for the tiniest bit of progress. I only mean that things may not be smooth sailing at first, and you'd be amazed at how much a little patience and understanding can go. As much as we might fight the notion of being loved and desired, we absolutely want to get there, it just takes some of us a bit more time to come out of the mist. When we do though, there's a good chance you've got a partner for life.
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