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Old 08-02-2017, 03:48 PM   #9
LJ Rock
 
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Boston
Posts: 3,172
LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!LJ Rock has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default The truth shall set you free

Keeping something like this a secret from your life partner is not conducive to a healthy or happy relationship. Eventually you will have to come clean, one way or another. My feeling is it's always better to be honest, tell the truth and own it, no matter what it is. Let the chips fall where they may and deal with it.

I would agree with the posters here who have said that you should work it out on your own, figure out what it is you really want. I would just say that you should do it quickly and let your partner know what you've learned about yourself, because the longer you keep something like this secret the more it will eat away at you, and your relationship.

(and yes, I speak from experience.)

I would also be very curious how it is you had no idea about this desire until you'd already been married for five years. I mean, you must have had some inkling before - no?

Regardless, something like this doesn't have to ruin your marriage. If you have a truly strong and loving relationship with your wife, and you are able to be open and honest with one another in all ways, including all of your sexual desires and proclivities, then you should be able to share this as a fantasy that you'd like to play out with her and nothing more.

Maybe she's not a BBW, but the imagination is a powerful thing; maybe you can have some fun with food play, feeding one another some sweets or something, rubbing her tummy and feeling how full she is, if that's something you're into. Maybe she can put a pillow under her shirt and you can pretend it's a big belly - or heck, maybe she'll even put on a few extra lbs for you. You won't know if you don't talk to her about it.

But you gotta know what you want. If you want to be happy and make your marriage work, then commit to it fully and do whatever it takes. If your eyes are looking elsewhere, BBWs or not, there is probably an emotional reason why more than a sexual one. Something is missing, and you need to figure out what it is. There is no reason why having some fun and playful fantasies about fatness should dissolve a strong and healthy relationship.

Follow your heart, it will never steer you wrong.
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Peace and love,
LJ Rock
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