Thread: I can't commit!
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Old 08-03-2017, 11:06 PM   #17
Im into Fetishes Now!
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Originally Posted by LJ Rock View Post
First of all, I am sorry to hear of the bad luck and heartache you've been through in your past four relationships. We've all been there at sometime or another and I know it's hard.

Based on what you've said I would say that you have a trust issue more than a commitment issue. Your trust has been violated numerous times, making hard for you to trust someone fully and completely enough to have a true sense of emotional intimacy, thereby making it seem impossible to commit to them fully.

Have you ever asked yourself why you ended up in these bad relationships? There comes a point where we can see a pattern develop in the choices we make, and it's up to us to start making different choices. The people we choose to spend time with and give our trust to is entirely up to us and is almost never accidental. There are reasons why we are attracted to the people to whom we are, good bad or otherwise. When we see red flags, things that make you question someone's integrity or trustworthiness, then it's best we sidestep that person altogether. It may seem to go against our primary instincts at first, but it gets easier.

My advice would be that the next time you meet someone that you like, take it very slow. Really get to know them well before you rush into any kind of commitment. By all means, talk to other men - as many as you'd like. If the man you truly desire desires you equally as much he will understand and he will give you the time and space you need to build trust. The moment you feel that you are giving more than you are getting, that's the moment to break out before you get hurt. But when you feel that you are with someone with whom you can truly be yourself and trust implicitly, then I suspect your interest in chatting with other men will quickly subside.

Taking your time and communication are the key. Good luck!
It's so funny that you say that but see I have had some relationships where i have jumped and some i have taken time to get to know a person BUT do we ever really know a person, you can be married for 20 years and the person do something to violate your trust so what does that mean? It is hard but like this quote said i wish all the people who like to cheat would date each other and leave the rest of us alone lol
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