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#26 |
Fnord
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
Posts: 5,249
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When people ask my orientation, I say I'm open to opportunity.
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Wishlist because I like stuff |
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#27 |
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Commonwealth of Ky
Posts: 3,462
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Great answer!!
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#28 |
donuts at the finish line
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Boston
Posts: 4,115
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Because we live in a monogamous society, I find that I tend to go through fairly distinct phases for boys or girls. It makes my online profiles confusing sometimes. Last summer I was really all about girls and that changed where I went and what I fantasized about. Even briefly dated a lovely gal. Now I'm in boy mode at the moment. I've long been open to being more truly bisexual but I worry I'll never find the truly bisexual poly fat loving lovers I dream of.
This reminds me I want to post on Amples fit in thread since my current phase means I'm thinkin and feelIng less queer which can be confusing!
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"Your half chub is offensive to my delicate sensibilities." |
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#29 |
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Currently living in Perth, Australia
Posts: 20
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I fluctuate constantly.
To be brutally honest, my tastes probably change depending on what "the last one" was like. If I have a fantastic experience with a guy, I'm suddenly as gay as a Christmas tree. If a guy pisses me off, I tend to swear off men for all time.... well, a while.... XxX |
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#30 |
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 2
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Too many are fixated on the biological equipment (internal or external plumbing, so to speak) to realize that the possibilities are much more complicated. I like a model of sexual attraction that is continuous on multiple dimensions rather that a few discrete choices. In some cases, I'm only interested in men, but other instances include a range of women and transgender individuals. Then there's a complex range of fetishes that fit well with various individuals. I tend to prefer larger men (muscular to extremely fat) to women, but for some bizarre reasons, I find slender women very attractive, much more so that skinny men. The mental considerations of intelligence, language ability, and humor are also very important no matter the biological gender. I read and write lots of erotic literature and view man images on the web. Perhaps, I'm just pan sexual with a range of fetishes. Enjoy the variety!
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HXTP |
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#31 |
High Carb Low Fat Vegan
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Scotland, UK
Posts: 399
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I am 100% lesbian, dyed in the wool and ever lover of the female form. I have had bisexual friends in the past who could never feel "settled" and when in a relationship with women they craved men and vice versa - so isn't being drawn to both sexes a recipe for heartache, confusion and unfilfillment? I know that being bi would confuse me and not be something fun at all. Also partners of bisexual friends have confided they do not feel secure in their relationships due to their fluidity of sexuality.
I do not mind who falls in love with who in this life but it seems bisexuality can bring many complications with it. Don't you ever wish you could just fall in love and settle without feeling you are losing out because you want the sex that you are not with presently (without resorting to threesomes within the confines of a relationship which defeats the point of a relationship to me). I guess I am just wondering how bisexuality brings peace of heart because the choice alone almost ensures you will not have a great amount of it due to the very nature of bisexuality (Lets not include straight girls who kiss/bed other straight girls to get a guy or to please a guy cos that really demeans and belittles MY sexuality and p*sses me off big style). How many men kiss/bed men to attract a woman??? lol Hmmmmm, I wonder lol Why is it always the women? Then that on its own is heterosexuality passed off as bisexuality to appeal to a mate? It's all so twisted and complicated!! lol
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My "Food" is grown and NOT born. Vegan & proud. |
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#32 |
mostly harmless
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 12,614
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Well, bisexuality is no more a choice that other sexualities. One can't change who they are, only how they behave.
By and large I think people who have a more focused being have an easier time in settings where who they are is acceptable, those with more diffuse natures have an easier time dealing with intolerant situations. (i.e. in Canada, it is may be easier on you to either be purely heterosexual or purely homsexual than to be bisexual? In Iran it is surely easier to be bisexual than purely homosexual.)
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Criticism is so often nothing more than the eye garrulously denouncing the shape of the peephole that gives access to hidden treasure. -Djuna Barnes, writer and artist
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#33 |
Drawing down the moonpie
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Sitka, AK
Posts: 1,281
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As a bisexual who's not had many long-term relationships I can't speak from direct experience. However, being open to whichever sex doesn't mean I'd be more likely to go outside a committed relationship because I really wanted to have any another person (being with a man and seeing a woman I'd be into, for example). I feel this is similar to the fact that not all homosexuals are going to pursue anyone of their same sex they feel attracted to as goes the straight culture worriers/haters so-called wisdom. My love map is rather fucked up so YMMV, of course.
I used to like Woody Allen's quote about bisexuals having twice the chance of a date on Saturday nights but I wonder now if the line itself (or just the attitude) has contributed to the belittling of the depths of our feelings. Then there's always the corollary thought that we have twice the chances of being rejected, too.
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. Non timebo mala. "Well. When I'm here with you, I kind of miss myself the way I used to be." |
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#34 | |||||
Fnord
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Brisbane, Australia.
Posts: 5,249
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Also, not everyone is monogamous. If you're not wanting to settle down with just one person, and you know you still want to date others, then you should say so upfront - and that's for everyone, straight, gay, bi, everything in between. Quote:
Plenty of straight or gay people find themselves attracted to other people when they're in relationships. They cheat, they lie, they fantasise about doing things with those people. Bisexual doesn't mean cheater or incapable of being faithful or always wanting what you can't/don't have.
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Wishlist because I like stuff |
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#35 |
cuddly, hairy, and fat
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: among the bamboo thickets
Posts: 2,329
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this bisexual is attracted to the person, not the gender, so I guess bisexual is not quite the wrong term to use, anyway. The important thing is, Tad, Dmitra, and penguin all hit it right on the head, so I have little else to add, except that with genderqueer people, you can kind of have all the genders you want, all at the same time (i kid, i kid, sort of).
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Have you seen my nip on the internet? |
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#36 |
Rabid Squirrel
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Ireland
Posts: 133
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Hmm... Well I label myself as bi, when it is necessary, to make things easier to explain.
But to be honest, I am attracted to people, not genders. Male, female, transgender, etc. It doesn't bother me. If I'm attracted to the person, the gender is irrelevant. But sometimes, yes, I go through stages where I find I've been attracted to more girls than guys, and vice versa. Don't know if it means anything though.
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Safety pins, holding up the things, that make you mine. About your hair, you needn't care, you look beautiful all of the time. |
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#37 |
Delurking
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 2,763
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#38 | |
cuddly, hairy, and fat
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: among the bamboo thickets
Posts: 2,329
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Have you seen my nip on the internet? |
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#39 |
mostly harmless
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 12,614
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Criticism is so often nothing more than the eye garrulously denouncing the shape of the peephole that gives access to hidden treasure. -Djuna Barnes, writer and artist
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#40 | |
Crazy Person
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: through the looking glass, nwpa
Posts: 150
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How is that any different?
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If its cool to be sane then count me in - insanity is fun, you make up your own world as you go! |
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#41 |
Dark and scarry
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 4,578
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I wasn't really sure if I should post in this thread or not, considering my former relationship with the poster, but she hasn't been on here in years so I GUESS it's ok... um...
but uh yeah I'm pansexual and polyamorous. I don't miss sex with girls when I'm with a guy, and I don't miss sex with guys when I'm with a girl. Also, if I'm dating someone monogamous, if I am massively in love with them like I am with my boyfriend now I will set aside the polyamory as much as I can.
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In the future, the world was dark and scarry. |
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#42 |
Join Date: May 2007
Location: Tampa, Florida, USA, EARTH
Posts: 37
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I think we worry too much about labels. I am bisexual who has realized her attraction for both men and women since early childhood. I personally prefer monogamy so I only have one relationship at a time but that no way lessened my attraction. My only dilemma has been that I have found that there are more men than women that are attracted and accepting of BBW.
I was married to a man for 15yrs. He recently passed away so I am not currently ready to find a new romance. I honestly would like my next relationship to be with a woman but I cannot control who I fall for. It should not matter whether you are gay, straight or bi just as long as you find someone to love. ![]() |
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#43 |
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 379
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I've had many phases throughout life. I've always loved heavyset women, but I every once in a while go through phases in which I like men too, as well as some thinner women. I'm basically back to liking just bbw/ssbbw now, but I'm still aware that I might have same sex physical attractions later on down the road.
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#44 | |
KNOW IT ALL
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 4,916
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However, as a disclaimer, I might feel differently from other bisexuals because I'm not 50/50. I am attracted sexually to women, and occasionally romantically, but I don't see myself in a long term, committed relationship with one. That's why I hate using the term bisexual, because it doesn't entirely describe my sexuality. It's too black & white, but its what I use when pressed for one. |
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#45 | |
unabashedly obese
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Northwest
Posts: 267
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"if I fall if I die know I lived it till the fullest if I fall if I die know I lived and missed some bullets..." |
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#46 |
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Mass
Posts: 32
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Interesting topic. While I dated my gf, my longest relationship. I had other interests that she encouraged in fantasy but never in action. Now that I am single I have become more interested in bi kinda stuff as well, but have not tried yet. I am curious about this too. I think sexuality can be on a spectrum. I think as long as you are honest and truthful with people there is nothing wrong with experimenting.
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#47 |
Delurking
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Europe
Posts: 2,763
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This might be an unpopular opinion but fantasy ≠ reality.
Many women who are essentially straight fantasize about lesbian sex and get turned on by some aspects of it, but when push comes to shove they have no intention of actually sleeping with another woman. I also know numerous self-identified gay men who feel the same way about trying it with a girl and lesbians who occasionally think of how sex would be like if they had a penis. I wouldn't consider those types bisexual but hey, if they want to identify as such, more power to them as long as they try to be open and honest about what they are after. |
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#48 |
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Sydney, Australia
Posts: 14
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i like what i like when i like it. I've been in long term relationships with one gender and craved the other. I just have to be honest when that craving gets out of control.. i love and adore women, but dont feel that I am attractive to many (well certainly not in my circle of acquaintances) and i also love and adore men - to whom my softness is attractive...
i identify as me.. i gravitate to those who attract me
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a little bit of good in the worst of them - and a little bit of bad in the so-called best of them |
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#49 |
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Louisville, Ky
Posts: 230
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I'm the exact same way.
Look at it this way: Sometimes you want sausage, some times you want a taco. Amirite? <3
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"And you look a little touché'd..." -[SIGPIC]http://i53.tinypic.com/2zi3h3k.jpg[/SIGPIC] |
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#50 | |
Join Date: May 2008
Location: UK - North East
Posts: 28
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What you could be referring to is a hormonal thing. Around the time that you are ovulating, your hormones tell your body to go out and fertilise those eggs. It is quite common to be attracted more to guys during that time. Kinda makes sense.
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Burying The Castle! |
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