Dimensions Forums  
Home Register Premium Membership Health Issues Market Place Big Fashion

Go Back   Dimensions Forums > Discussion > BBW Forum



Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 05-22-2011, 02:42 PM   #76
hiddenexposure
 
hiddenexposure's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Richmond Va
Posts: 207
hiddenexposure has super-sized rephiddenexposure has super-sized rephiddenexposure has super-sized rephiddenexposure has super-sized rephiddenexposure has super-sized rep
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pitch View Post
You know, I would like to say "my fat doesn't define me", but I think it does in a certain way. I honestly feel if I had never started gaining weight once I hit puberty; I would have been: vapid, self absorbed, codependent, defining myself through the image other people saw and etc. You get the point. It may or may not be true, but I am very slightly vain (occasionally) at the moment...I cannot imagine what I would be like with so many men and women feeding my ego.

I think (don't crucify me) that being "invisible" or revolting to the majority of the populace has kept me in check to some degree. I'm not happy with my size, but I am also of the mindset that I wouldn't be if I were 125 pounds, either. I go back and forth on this issue. I'll say frankly that though I am body shy and still have a lot to go with accepting my body, my friends tend to think of me as a "Lovably arrogant bastard". Exact words, btw.

I realized recently that the main reason I was so recently desperate to lose weight was to gain power. I had a frank and pure bitterness for how men treated me due to size and I kind of wanted to be smaller to make them suffer for slighting me. I know this is all kind of gross, but it's the truth. This was my basic reasoning aside from wanting to wear fashionable things and be "comfortable"...whatever that means.

I'm now of the mindset that I must accept who I am and not live up to the moniker of "Tyrant" tattooed on the back of my neck. >.>

So, I think being fat let me have my interest in art. It let me have my love of sci-fi, let me love physics and cosmology, gave me literature,my shameless freedom from neediness, my willingness to speak up when I want or need to, my lack of codependency when everyone else I know (mostly thin)just HAS to have someone, my dedication to art and not being shallow. More than a pretty face, etc, etc.

Sorry if this made anyone go "Ew, Jesus...what a terrible person", but I'm just being honest. 3:
man! you are in my head! i have been having the same thoughts over the years.
__________________
http://hiddenexposurephotography.com :batting:
hiddenexposure is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 10:05 AM   #77
lollipops708
 
lollipops708's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: texas! its bloody hot here!
Posts: 22
lollipops708 can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokeslollipops708 can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default

Well

I come from a family of bigger people, and was that way up untill 2 years ago when my mother who was at her largest of 250 at 5'1 had the gastric bypass surgery (she now weighs 125 and wants to be smaller!) and following her shortly after was my older brother who was also at his biggest weight of 380 at 5'10(and he now weighs a whopping 160 and is now training for a 5k run which he never thought was possible)and what was once a fat family now consists of two athletic people and one fat.

So like your friend my family has started pressuring me to go the same route, to eat differently and be more active and look into getting the surgery done. and while there is an overwhelming temptation to do so, I agree with you i think my size has made me the woman i am, all of my maloe friends constantly say that if i had come out a skinny girl I would have never become the great woman that i am today.


No offence to the skinnier women among us but i believe thicker women have better characters and personalities. because while we are smart, beautiful and talented we have to work to get our beauty, talent and intelligence recognised.

so who knows really.. i guess its how they say the grass is always greener on the other side. either way you fat or skinny lose or gain somthing.
lollipops708 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 12:05 PM   #78
TexasTrouble
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Location: Austin, TX
Posts: 202
TexasTrouble has super-sized repTexasTrouble has super-sized repTexasTrouble has super-sized repTexasTrouble has super-sized rep
Default

I'm a newbie here, but I was just thinking about this the other day. I've been fat my whole life (since a toddler) and, at my smallest, I was still a pretty big girl but very physically active. I'm trying to get back to that stage because I loved having a ton of energy.
I think being fat has helped shaped my personality and how I interact with people, particularly men because of a lot of bad experiences growing up. I'm working my way through this (the only way out is through!), but it can be tough sometimes.
One thing I'm very grateful for (really, truly) is that it's helped me become more compassionate toward people who are "different." Growing up in a VERY small, conservative Southern town, anyone who was the slightest bit different was a target. The message was that "good" people were thin, white, Christian, conservative, etc. and at a very young age I remember thinking, "No, you're not. You're horrible. You treat other people like dirt. I don't care if you can check off all the 'good people' boxes, how you treat people matters more." I think this really opened my mind and helped me make a really diverse set of friends with really amazing hearts. I think if I hadn't been an outsider bc of my weight, I may have never challenged that prevailing attitude (or it may have happened later). So that has been the greatest gift being larger has given me. (Cue corny, inspirational music ).
TexasTrouble is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 12:19 PM   #79
Tania
Disneyland Bobsled Team
 
Tania's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: The corner of Small World Mall & Matterhorn Way.
Posts: 1,975
Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

My shape is a huge part of my physical identity, but the fat itself...not so much.

Lots of people might contend that a person's core self is - or should be considered - essentially abstract, and that physical attributes are transient and incidental and thereby fundamentally unimportant. Appearances may be fluid, but to me, being brunette and pear-shaped is as much a part of "me" as the fact that I squeal when I see a kitty and respond positively to the color pink. At some point, it's impossible to separate what I look like and how my body affects my daily life from my character and personality. My inner self is shaped and bound by external factors and the abilities and limitations of my body, just as my outer self is often an expression, a physical manifestation, of who I am inside.
__________________
You're such a strange girl
I think you come from another world

~ The Cure

"She will never submit to any thing requiring industry and patience, and a subjection of the fancy to the understanding."
~ Mr. Knightley on Emma, Jane Austen's Emma
Tania is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-21-2011, 01:58 PM   #80
lozonloz
 
lozonloz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Location: Suffolk UK/London
Posts: 270
lozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going onlozonloz knows EXACTLY what's going on
Default

I feel that my fat is a big part of my identity. the smallest I have ever been as an adult is a UK size 14 after a powder only food replacement diet got me down from a size 26 in about 6-8 months. I really, truly, hated it and felt uncomfortable. I'd be walking around going "I have no boobs, I have no butt, and yeah I have no real belly but I have no SHAPE." I've never felt less feminine. I associate femininity heavily with curves- I just wanted to hide my body.

My issues with my size are that others have issues with it, that I'd like to have a wider clothes selection, not worry about breaking chairs or being able to sit in aeroplane seats, go to a gym and get fitter without being stared at like a leper. Widen my dating pool. And I worry about getting diabetes, which is why I'm trying to eat healthier. My big issues with being fat and it making me feel bad stem from others making me feel bad about it to shame me into changing.

But I am a fat woman. I like being a fat woman. And it's.. it's just me, who I am and who I feel comfortable being. And as a smaller girl, I personally have never had anyone look at me the way a smitten guy looks at me as a heavier girl. Like you're a goddess. It's...just...an...AWESOME feeling. I never got that as a size 14. I never felt that sexy.

My big fat sexy ass is part of my identity. My body is a part of who I am.
__________________
Raised by wolves, but fostered by sloths.
lozonloz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-28-2011, 08:08 PM   #81
prettyeyes77
 
prettyeyes77's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Narnia O_O
Posts: 71
prettyeyes77 does more than just post hot picsprettyeyes77 does more than just post hot picsprettyeyes77 does more than just post hot picsprettyeyes77 does more than just post hot pics
Default

I sometimes worry that if I lose allot of weight that my face will look funny, like because I have large eyes, lips, nose, that they would look massive on a smaller head. But as for it changing me as a person more than just aesthetically, at this point, I don’t think it would. The thing I hate most about my size is being stared at, all I can think are that they are thinking all these horrible things about me; you know all the “she must eat a ton”, “she must be so lazy,” stuff. But even if I lost weight I would still get stared at a bit, people just look at other people and assess them, good, bad, indifferent you’re going to be judged no matter what. And If I slimed down and all the sudden all these people who couldn’t be bothered to speak with me as a fatty suddenly wanted to be my friend… I would think, “I’m the same, same mind, same heart, same damn girl… so why would the Barbie version of me be more worthy of respect and adoration?! And why the hell would I want to be friends with people who can’t see past the nose on their own face!” Nope I am ME, slim or fat, I’d still be too sarcastic for some, to quiet for other and to ME for the general public. *shrug* Having said that, I am still working on my self-loathing issues but for me those are pretty separate from my "who am I" issues. kinda, maybe...
__________________
“I know that you believe you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.”
prettyeyes77 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-30-2011, 06:30 PM   #82
katherine22
 
katherine22's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Tualatin, Oregon (near Portland)
Posts: 566
katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

[So, I try to reclaim what fat means for myself and others, and hope that for those of us who do this, eventually the word fat will cease to be such a powerful tool of negativity for our culture.

With that being said, I have a very strong belief in my own 'fat identity' because I enjoy lots of things about being fat, and I am attracted to other fat people. I don't know how else to sustain these beliefs without having a central 'fat identity.' In fact, out of all the different identities I could claim, I think I claim fat before all others except maybe for my racial identity, but I don't have nearly as many pleasant associations with my racial identity as I do my bodily identity.[/QUOTE]


One quarter of my life I was thin in my twenties and in my forties. I struggled to be thin and when I look at old photographs of myself, I do not think I look well thin. My face looks drawn and longer. Being fat brings some roundness to my face which is attractive at my age. I like my body's roundness, and at times I look like a Renoir woman since he liked red headed women who were round. I love my body and my only regret is that I didn't understand its beauty when I was younger.
__________________
"It's absurd to divide people into good and bad. People either or charming or tedious." Oscar Wilde

Queen Elizabeth I residing within.

If I continue to eat I will grow as big as a room.
"What are rooms for?":bow:
katherine22 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-04-2011, 08:32 PM   #83
wtchmel
 
wtchmel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Ben Lomond ,Ca.
Posts: 248
wtchmel can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokeswtchmel can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default

Hmmmm.... (first i haven't read thru the whole thread,my habit before posting,lol) i have to say at this stage of my life (and the last 17 years +) i have identified with my fat self in the fact that while being fat, i have "found myself" so to speak. I'm the most confident i've ever been, People don't fuck with me at all(love that intimidation factor) and i've just loved my body for the first time in my life these past years. Now.... If i were thin, i'm not sure how it would go, identity wise. In the past, when I was thinner, i was massively insecure, 'looks' focused to the extreme, hated my life, and put my life on hold till i could 'just get thinner'. Everything rested on, "if i could just be skinny-er".
If i were thin now, who knows....... strange to think about , as i haven't allowed that type of thinking in for so long, for self preservation almost.
Shit, rambling again,lol.....
__________________
Melanie
wtchmel is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:34 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright Dimensions Magazine. All rights reserved worldwide.