Has anyone here talked to their parents about their "Special interests"?

[FA117]

Like, as my name suggests, I am a FA, but I have yet to talk to my parents about my tendencies for they are fairly judgmental, although they already suspect. Just wondering if anybody here has gotten over the parent barrier yet, and if so, how?

[Cors]

I am in my early 20s. My fat-phobic pretty much always knew though, since I was a young teen.

For me, the only reason to "come out" is to prepare them especially if they are the kind who will be outright mean to the poor woman you bring home. If they meet enough of your fat girlfriends, they'd get the message eventually. If they confront you about it, you could perhaps say something like you prefer bigger girls but I would focus on talking about the special qualities your girlfriend has and not her size.

[Tad]

Personally, I never saw how my general preferences were any of their business. That they'd treat with respect anyone I dated was all that I asked, and for me that wasn't too hard to make happen.

In general I think it is so much easier to sell a specific person to them, rather than a general category. They might feel that fat people in general are lacking in self-control, ambition, and personal hygiene, for example....but Sue, well she is in college, getting good grades, and takes great care of herself, and she appreciates your Mom's meatloaf and laughs at your Dad's jokes, so it is a lot harder to be down on her.... (to create an imaginary example)

[Blackhawk2293]

My parents are quite the weight fearing bunch, some of it is for health reasons associated with family history (perfectly understandable) but a lot of it is because the gossiping nature of my family and my culture (fucking annoying).

However, in my case, I'm nearly 34 and so what they or any of my family think is irrelevant. Especially since I moved out of home when I was 19 and stayed away from the family for 8 years because of all the conflict I had with my dad during my teenage years. They know full well that I have no problem cutting ties again if they try to push me around or dictate what kind of woman (appearance and personality) I choose.

Of course, not everyone has the will to cut ties with their family the way I have done in the past.

[oranges]

I'm 19, and some how both my parents know I'm an FFA, but I don't remember how they found out. I think I told my little sister first and she ended up telling them.

Of course, they're fairly embarrassing about it. My mom teases me about it every chance she gets. If I'm dating some one thinner than I usually go for she says something to the effect that I need to "fatten them up."

My dad's not as bad though he did describe my boyfriend as a "gentle giant," which I thought was cute. He also felt the need to send me a facebook message about not to "feel bad about the whole chubby chaser thing" because "beauty is in the eye of the beholder blah blah blah."

I'm lucky though, my family is pretty supportive in that sense. I don't know how I'd feel about my extended family knowing however, my grandma has said some pretty fat-phobic things, but I'm not close to them anyways.

[Nordiques]

I have a great relationship with my family, but this is definitely one uncomfortable area. I remember when I was in second grade and was telling my mother, who worked in the school so she was familiar with everyone, about a girl I had a crush on. Her reaction was "why her? She's so fat." Obviously, at that age, I 1) didn't realize how society viewed people of size, and 2) didn't know why I liked a girl that the authority figure in my life was telling me I wasn't supposed to.

Now, if my parents asked, I'd actually have answers. But, they don't ask, so maybe they've either changed, or they just deal with it privately. I don't think it's a huge issue for them as much as it's something they don't really understand or think is "normal." After all, they have found faults in thinner girls I have dated (chemistry with the girl always takes precedence over her body type, even if I have a very strong preference, I have an even stronger preference for happy, meaningful connections) too, so if it were a real issue, I'm sure they would have been encouraging me to stay with those girls.

You can go either way, but don't feel like you have to tell them anything. You are allowed to have privacy from your family if you want it, but if you feel being open will make things better for you, tell them.

[lordbo]

I have not yet told them lol

[Nenona]

I don't tell them about any of my "special interests"
My mom has weight obsession problems.
And my dad is a general asshole.

I actually hide most of my hobbies from them--from comic books to the tv shows I watch--they don't like fantasy/scifi--they think that I 'Live in a fantasy world" and that somehow, enjoying media makes me deluded/dangerously unprepared for the world.
So I purposefully don't share anything I'm doing with them. They won't understand, and it'll just scare and confuse them.

[HeavyDuty24]

Im glad my mom is the pretty understanding love you no matter what type of mom's. My mom knows my perferences since im pretty verbal about most of them. lol But i don't tell her everything but she knows pretty much the basics.

[extra_m13]

well to be honest i think they have an idea but i havent openly told them you know '' i prefer girl with a big belly and that love to eat and have no problem with gaining weight'' not sure how they would react but most importantly... not sure how that sould matter for them

[pepsicola93]

I haven't told my parents, and I don't think I'm going to. My "special interests" aren't really something that come up in conversation. And I don't think they would want to know anyway. They probably want to know about my interests as much as I want to know about theirs, lol. (ew).

[thatpumpkin]

One time my mother and I were walking in a parking lot, there was a very cute pudgy woman walking towards us. I was admiring how round her belly looked when mom leaned down and said "Someone needs a bigger shirt." Thats when I decided that plus sized chicks would be something I keep to myself.

[DayLovely]

I still get worried about what my parents think when they meet or I show them a picture of someone I'm into. But ever since I brought home my first boyfriend they pretty much knew I think.

They don't understand at all but they don't talk to me about it. I think from the little they have said they actually find it kind of quirky and funny. And recently they even started teasing me light-heartedly about it. So we kind of deal with it by not really talking about it at all

But they're still weirdly fat-phobic! Like, we'll be watching a TV programme or we'll see someone in the street and my parents will be like "they need to sort themselves out" or something along those lines. When they clearly know, if it's a boy of a certain size and around my age, I'll definitely be checking them out. It's weird...

It was far more important to me to tell my friends so that I could actually talk about boys to them without feeling weird. I'm 19, I knew I was into fat boys for ages and ages, but I've only recently felt able to openly talk about to people my age. I think it's just to do with growing up. I do know I'm far happier now I'm finally open about it, and it's far more respectful to the guys I'm into.

I should stop rambling. I'm sorry xxx

[testaa]

One day, i brought my third bbw girlfriend home and at the same moment, she went out off the house an closed the door, my father just asked me "do you like big girls?"... and i was a little bit shoked an ashamed and full of panik (because i ve never talked with anyone about it before...) haha and just asked "WHY?!" i think i ve never told them about it but they know it... they are my parents

[testaa]

Originally Posted by thatpumpkin

One time my mother and I were walking in a parking lot, there was a very cute pudgy woman walking towards us. I was admiring how round her belly looked when mom leaned down and said "Someone needs a bigger shirt." Thats when I decided that plus sized chicks would be something I keep to myself.

i understand you! my parents are always on diet and always try to loose weight and they re soooo happy if they hear that i or my bbw girlfirend loose weight but also they accept my girlfriend!!! and thats a really important fact for me!

[Edd]

Fortunately for me my parents have never much cared whom I dated. They never asked, and to be honest I haven't ever gotten a chance to date someone that would fall into any of these categories. :/ I just never found the right girl and there was always pressure not to, my friends would of laugh and just been rude about it so sometimes I'd just let one go.

[hela90]

I have not done that yet, but I rather have them accept it anyway. I plan to one day find a very plump mate and when I do, it will be the greatest day ever!

[crosseyedhamster]

I came out to my parents about liking bigger women when I was 12, but I think they already suspected, as I'd often hang out with the curvier girls.

They're both really chill about it, it was my best friends that took some time getting used to it, and they still joke about it (though in their defense we always poke fun at eachother over everything)

[Shinobi_Hime-Sama]

My parents either know and don't care or they don't know at all. I've been dating my boyfriend for nearly two years now and they don't seem to care that he's chubby. Not that I've dated that many guys, but I really haven't told them I prefer fat guys my dad makes comments about fat people he sees on TV or out in the world that are not that nice. But then again he's 60 and pretty much stuck in his ways so I don't try to correct him, I just ignore it whenever he says them.

[Thunderflab]

My parents did not care to much about it years ago, but I guess as the times and stigmas have changed, they have got rather closed about this type of subject.
I brought back a girly friend, which was 24st back in 07 and oh my, they freaked out at me and asked her to leave. So I guess if i told them I was FA, they might disown me or something like that. So coming out should be done with some caution and only do it if you think they might give you the up most respect.
T.Flab