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Old 05-04-2009, 09:03 PM   #26
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I think there are at least four of us.

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Old 05-09-2009, 11:23 PM   #27
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Five. Definitely five.
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Old 05-09-2009, 11:54 PM   #28
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I got it the first time I was with a fat admirer. It's hard not to when you can see how turned on they are, and I like that
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Old 05-10-2009, 09:25 AM   #29
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I'm #6 here, but I have to say, you'll learn the other stuff too, and it becomes very enjoyable as well. Seeing how much your partner is getting turned on by what you are doing is very rewarding.

Good sex in a good relationship is about learning what your partner likes and and really enjoying giving it to them, and then as Teresa said eventually really enjoying it yourself.
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Old 05-10-2009, 03:07 PM   #30
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Dude, 1/2 of my posts here are probably related here.

Usually I end up telling my partner how much I like fat (specifically their fat) and discuss fat celebrities Im crushing on. I usually ease into touching any fat bits very slowly and am trying to become comfortable with discussing it. Ive dated people who are put off by it, and people who had never had it happen but were willing to go along with it.

I have no idea what would happen if if I met a BHM with the same kinks as me. Frankly I'd die of shock
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Old 05-14-2009, 02:00 PM   #31
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I'm sorry for those of you who've been with partners who don't get it or barely tolerate it. I think that's a horrible way to have a relationship, even if other things are good - it's a huge disconnect. I've thoroughly enjoyed having that bond and understand with my partners, so I only wish you all that.

I totally agree that it's a huge disconnect. I've been in two relationships where my gfs have understood my "fetishes", and being with them and the ones who haven't understood it is like night and day when it comes to intimacy. And I agree with you as well that I don't think FAs have "fat fetishes". I mean, what else are you gonna do when your gf has a big sexy belly and that's what turns you on...caress it, or rub it, or grab it, right? lol. How is that different than a guy touching a skinny chick anywhere on her body cause he finds her body attractive? Is that considered a "skinny fetish"? There def are "fat fetishes" , don't get me wrong, and I think some are really weird, but fetishes are meant to be weird, that's what makes them a fetish lol. But being attracted to a bbw/ssbbw for her ample physical features is not a fetish.
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Old 05-20-2009, 12:03 AM   #32
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Hmmm....well....I've had no problem with tickling/rubbing a BBW's belly that Im intimate with since they usually do something similar to me like play with my moobs. I guess it may be different for a number of us who are BHM/BBW FAs. I usually tell a partner that their stretch marks/blemishes don't bother me because they make them human.
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Old 05-21-2009, 08:56 AM   #33
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I don't understand people, whatever their size, who compartmentalise their bodies into parts and have sexual no-go areas and ok sex areas etc. Not letting a dude rub my tummy or dry hump my inner thigh is like telling him not to give me head or turning down a good rim job - and there's no way I'm doing that!! Good sex surely means using every part of yourself to experience and give pleasure to your partner - no matter how skinny or fat you happen to be? It was pure, pure heaven finding out that there are men who love my elbow cleavage, and back and neck rolls and actually wanna lick my chub-rub. Also, tummy rubs are king!
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Old 06-19-2009, 01:17 AM   #34
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I think some of the bigger girls might think that if you're into their fat, that might be the main thing you're interested in. Or at least, the thing that has you attracted to them.

Personally, I think if the guy can touch it, then he's obviously not bothered by it, but I'd still be shy and self-conscious about letting him. As an FFA, I know why I find soft, big bodies attractive, but when it comes to mine, I have no idea what anyone could see appealing. I've grown up with both of my parents pushing their own self-loathing of their obesity onto me, trying to force me to lose weight so I'm not miserable like they are. While I appreciate the sentiment, all it really did is make me feel ugly, gross, and never good enough. Having moments where your movement causes your shirt to ride up a little and your dad says "Pull your shirt down, I'm embarrassed for you" doesn't really instill moments of "Oh my god, I am sexy." For every one time you tell her you think she's beautiful, she's probably had 20 other sources (media, exes, family members trying to help, friends, not-friends, etc) telling her otherwise.

I've never had a boyfriend, but if I did I'd want him to show my fat places some sort of affection. And to be patient when I'm guilty of sighing and rolling my eyes as his calling me beautiful.

People who can't deal with negativity make me sad. As someone suffering with chronic depression (since I was 13), it's a part of my life. My insecurity isn't a "pity me" game, it's just that, an insecurity. Some girls worry about their nose, I worry about my body shape. It doesn't mean I can't be happy and have moments where I am confident, though.
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Old 11-01-2013, 10:48 PM   #35
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I have been looking for the best place that I could post an amazing experience I had tonight. My wife of 4 years is a ssbbw and I am a moderately sized fa. She knows that I love her body and she doesn't "get it". She has the self loathing/wish-i-had-a-thin-pill desire.
Tonight she was eating a plate of desert. I asked if she enjoyed it. She replied with a pleasurable moan "oh yess!". Without getting too graphic, we enjoyed our first food play with sex. I will tell you what, it was some of the best sex we have had in a while! One night is not going to change years of self loathing. But I think she is Verrrry gradually starting to accept my immense pleasure in her amazingly sexy body. And maybe she is growing in self confidence in general too.
On the other hand I do not understand why she likes to play with my ears during sex.
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Old 11-06-2013, 03:15 PM   #36
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Originally Posted by wrenchboy View Post
I have been looking for the best place that I could post an amazing experience I had tonight. My wife of 4 years is a ssbbw and I am a moderately sized fa. She knows that I love her body and she doesn't "get it". She has the self loathing/wish-i-had-a-thin-pill desire.
Tonight she was eating a plate of desert. I asked if she enjoyed it. She replied with a pleasurable moan "oh yess!". Without getting too graphic, we enjoyed our first food play with sex. I will tell you what, it was some of the best sex we have had in a while! One night is not going to change years of self loathing. But I think she is Verrrry gradually starting to accept my immense pleasure in her amazingly sexy body. And maybe she is growing in self confidence in general too.
On the other hand I do not understand why she likes to play with my ears during sex.
Thanks for sharing this. I always enjoy this type of personal story.

It would seem that many women (and men) are heavier than they would like to be but don't seem able/willing for whatever reason to get to the weight they would like. Self-acceptance (any subject) generally is quite liberating even if it is only partial. Love and (enthusiastic) acceptance from your partner helps many crack the wall of self-loathing. Even so, my wife wouldn't like me obsessing over her fat even though she knows I love it.
I understand to some extent; if she had a crush on my belly button I'd rather not hear about it constantly. I just let her know how much I love the whole package and that works great for me...
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Old 11-22-2013, 07:31 AM   #37
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I am an FA with a sweet spot for soft bellies :-)

My first girl friend was not happy with her size and did not want me touching her belly. This also affected me as an FA, because I would feel guilty for liking her size when she didn't. I was conscious about not being too enthousiastic with her fat bits, but the result was that it was often difficult to get "ready" for sex.

My 2nd girl friend was very understanding about my FA'ness, but due to a previous tummy tuck surgery had lost all feeling in her belly region. I felt selfish if I put my hands too much on her belly, knowing that she did not have any sensation there, and although sex was better with her than with my first girl friend, it was sometimes still difficult.

My current girl friend absolutely loves that fact that I love her fat bits. It is not so much that she considers them an erogenous zone or sexy, but it is knowing that I find her incredibly sexy that gets her going. She absolutely loves it that I am so tactile and cuddly, also in a non-sexual way, for example when we are just watching TV. She also uses it to her advantage and knows how to get me going when she is in the mood for something. Sex with her is really fantastic, for both of us!

I don't need my girl friend to "get" my preference for fat (I think only FAs get that), but I do need that I can feel fully comfortable, not worrying that she will find my preference strange or so. I am a loving partner for whom a big woman is so much more than a big body or big belly, but in bed I do need a partner with whom I can be comfortable enough so that the FA part of my brain can take control.
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Old 11-22-2013, 01:39 PM   #38
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Good thread.

Personally, I can only date FAs. If you're not totally in love with my fat body, it's just not going to work. I love having all my fat bits touched and squeezed and massaged. Belly rubs on a full stuffed belly are the *best.* But I really do have a fat fetish and I'm okay admitting that - fat turns me on, even on myself. It has to be present in some way for me to experience pleasure.

My boyfriend loves fat chicks, but never really considered himself an "FA" (though he totally is one). He's not turned on by gaining and such like I am (though that my soon change haha), though he's very willing to indulge my fantasies. I feel lucky. Everyone deserves to have someone who fulfills their deepest desires. It creates an intimate bond like none other.
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Old 05-11-2014, 12:41 PM   #39
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I've had that before. I dated a girl who was like, 250 pounds, and she said my liking of her fat was "hot" but she still wanted to get skinnier. She asked me if when she gets skinny I'd still like her, and I immagined it and I was like "ewww" in my mind. I am not too proud to admit that I lied to her, saying I'd still love her just as much. But really, there isn't anything I like about a skinny girl's body. Fat is just the only thing I'd want. I'm not too sorry about it either. I mean, if a girl can't accept that her fat is beautiful, and that I want it really, really badly, and wants to just get all yucky and thin and boney and disgusting for the monster known as society, then eww, she just can't be mine for long.
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Old 05-12-2014, 08:44 AM   #40
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But really, there isn't anything I like about a skinny girl's body. Fat is just the only thing I'd want. I'm not too sorry about it either. I mean, if a girl can't accept that her fat is beautiful, and that I want it really, really badly, and wants to just get all yucky and thin and boney and disgusting for the monster known as society, then eww, she just can't be mine for long.
I can share part of this sentiment. Part of what makes a big majority of thin women so unattractive is their obsession with maintaining their thinness... which is just as much a turn-off to me as a BBW who is obsessed with blaming her weight for everything bad in her life.

So it can be very unattractive for a BBW to want to lose weight, not even for the plain fact that she would seem physically less desirable to an FA, but because it strikes me as a repulsive trait to modify your body purely due to societal pressure of all things. It's just a very unattractive quality and does indeed evoke the "eww" response from me as well.
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Old 05-13-2014, 02:20 PM   #41
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Well when they don't get it I usually rub, poke, fondle, caress, squeeze, grab, and tickle until they get the picture.

After some one has been made sweet sweet love to and are in a much more relaxed and trusting mood. They usually are more receptive to having their belly or butt rubbed in a post coitus cuddle.

In love and in life words are often rejected with out action to back them up.

You tell a lover you love their belly but to rub it gently until they are so relaxed and do at ease that they fall asleep in your arms without realizing it is to show them you love it.

For my lovers who have had these kind of hang ups, they have lived their while lives hating the parts of them I love. Hiding the places I most want to explore and love on with the lights on.

One doesn't undo that sort of thing with a few phrases and belly pinches.

Remember always, where there is love there is hope.

Ps. I cum on bellies like non fa's come on tits. That usually helps. I don't know how but it does....
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Old 05-14-2014, 07:08 AM   #42
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Totally true. You can't do that much with online relationships though, which unfortunately where all the fat girls are. Sure their bodies are somewhere in the world, but not in Alabama.
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Old 05-14-2014, 03:45 PM   #43
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Totally true. You can't do that much with online relationships though, which unfortunately where all the fat girls are. Sure their bodies are somewhere in the world, but not in Alabama.


Get out of Alabama.
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Old 05-14-2014, 04:52 PM   #44
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I thought Alabama was one of the hot spots for BBW? Sure seems like every guy I know that goes to Alabama single comes back with a really big wife!
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Old 05-15-2014, 06:54 AM   #45
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Well gosh, sure doesn't seem like it to me. Seems more like there are more in Mississipi and Texas :-) and maybe Tenessee.
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Old 05-26-2014, 04:46 PM   #46
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First off, I'd like to say what a good topic of discussion this is. Consequently, my partner's perception of her body and how she views my perception of it have been on my mind as of late. For reference, I am a FA in a committed relationship with a BBW who has been and is in an "Empowered Curves" group on Facebook but thought FA's were just mythological creatures, like the unicorn.

Q: FAs, how do you cope if your BBW/BHM does not understand your preference/fetish or enjoy them on the same level (eg. partner might like belly rubs casually but would rather you ignore her tummy completely in bed)?

A: I am well out of the fat closet and though I have been out of the scene for awhile, I have been involved in Size Acceptance since my teens, for at least a decade. I went through a period in my youth where I simply dated chubbier girls but as I grew up I became accustomed, comfortable and proud of my attraction. I will also admit that there is still the fun of the shock value of it and I have literally had people think I was joking when I told them what I was attracted to in women but that is a topic for another thread. Now, I date the kind of women I am attracted to, full figured and confident women. My current partner has good self body image and she wants to lose a little bit of weight for practical reasons as opposed to aesthetic. As I said, she was surprised at my genuine attraction to her figure but after maybe a day or two of discomfort she now enjoys my attraction to her all of her body. It goes both ways with us as well, I formerly was a BHM, 310 lbs at my heaviest, but I lost a significant amount of weight (135 lbs total) and so I have the left over skin from my tummy and love handles, etc. She loves to squish it and touch it and I was uncomfortable with it just a little in the beginning but if she loves it, who am I to complain. I am also fortunate in that my lady just enjoys being touched so all of my touches and kisses are usually happily met.

My personal advice would be that if you are with someone who fundamentally does not understand your sexuality and the things about them that you love are a cause for their own self-loathing, the situation is not tenable. I lived like that for three years with a woman that I loved very much but we ultimately fell apart because I loved her body and she hated it and I felt so incredibly guilty for it every time I saw her look into the mirror. Don't put yourself through that. Don't just give up either but don't let things stay that way if that's how they are. Love them but remember that you cannot change them, only help them change if that is what they want to do for themselves.
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