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Old 06-13-2014, 02:54 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by ToniTails View Post
it sounds to me like the poster just kind of expected everything to happen without much effort being put in--- i don't put much effort in promoting my modeling either, but i've always looked at modeling as a way to to have fun and look at the cash as a bonus
that and after re reading the op; it sounds like family/friends etc found out about her modeling and that caused problems, can't avoid ppl close to you finding about modeling on the net
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Old 06-13-2014, 02:55 AM   #27
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Originally Posted by KHayes666 View Post
This is one of the reasons why I left the "community". Here we have a normal woman made to feel worthless by the very same people that's supposed to be "accepting".

You did the right thing, its too bad things ended up worse than better.
is this not the "community"? It mustn't be since you are so obviously not in it! I must have taken a wrong turn in Albuquerque
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Old 06-13-2014, 02:57 AM   #28
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that and after re reading the op; it sounds like family/friends etc found out about her modeling and that caused problems, can't avoid ppl close to you finding about modeling on the net
If I feel I have to hide something, I don't do it! The feeling of shame involved in hiding things isn't worth it to me - nor that always niggling possibility of being found out
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Old 06-13-2014, 03:00 AM   #29
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Originally Posted by ToniTails View Post
If I feel I have to hide something, I don't do it! The feeling of shame involved in hiding things isn't worth it to me - nor that always niggling possibility of being found out
exactly, i hide nothing these days. partly because it takes too much energy to keep secrets
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Old 06-14-2014, 01:52 AM   #30
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Originally Posted by ToniTails View Post
is this not the "community"? It mustn't be since you are so obviously not in it! I must have taken a wrong turn in Albuquerque
Posting on an internet forum and going to actual dances/events, promoting size acceptance and actually caring about people are two different things.
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Old 06-14-2014, 07:40 AM   #31
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Default I knew a woman.

I knew a woman who was very large and also had very large breasts. During the time I knew her she went from about 352 about 550. She wanted to be a web model but due to her husband's job he did not encourage her to do so. After she and her husband separated she became a web model. I never heard her complain about the experience.

She was a very captivating person and took pride in being able to go into a NAAFA function, decide which was the most interesting Man in the room, and leave the room with that man. Once the most interesting man went off with someone else and my friend was extremely upset when that happened.

The difficultly she had was that she got older and even with very large breasts and weighing over 500 pounds and having a delightful personality it became more difficult to attract 20 and 30-year-old men, who had money and resources, to her delightful personality, large breasts, and 50-year-old body with a limp.

Somewhere out there appears a video of her and Norma Stitz measuring their breast sizes. My friend's measurements were larger although she graciously said to Norma that my friend have a lot more back fat than Norma.
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Old 06-14-2014, 09:03 AM   #32
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Default Over the years I have hidden things.

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Originally Posted by petersmyth79 View Post
exactly, i hide nothing these days. partly because it takes too much energy to keep secrets
I certainly never told my parents of the nature of all of my interactions with my high school girlfriend. When I first started teaching in this very conservative County I hid from people the fact that I've been on the March on Washington in 1963. I try to hide my true birth date from telemarketers. To the best of my ability I hide my passwords .

Since you hide nothing I'm sure there are people who would like to know your Social Security number, your credit card number, the name of your bank, your bank account number, and the password to your online bank account.
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Old 06-15-2014, 01:24 AM   #33
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even though i understand where y'all are coming from i grok exactly what KHayes is talking about. even as a woman people considered "attractive" i was subjected to so much negativity i stopped posting a lot of things i would ordinarily--and i am not even a web model. i get treated a whole lot better by an art world that hardly has any so called admirers. i am never told there that nobody wants me but a few and absolutely everybody else hates my body. and that i need to act in ways contrary to my personal dignity to be attractive. i also don't feel like love and beauty are dirty words there and those words have been used liberally to describe me as a totality and not in pieces in that world but almost never here. that told me all i needed to know.
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Old 06-15-2014, 01:45 AM   #34
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i..... i don't put much effort in promoting my modeling either, but i've always looked at modeling as a way to to have fun and look at the cash as a bonus
I think this ís the point.
Do it, if you love to show off your body. Don't do it for other reasons: your friend, money, boosting your confidence, e.g..
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Old 06-20-2014, 02:10 AM   #35
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" Finally I ended BBW modeling for another reason (some people found out about it and it got me in trouble) but I felt like absolute crap. Worthless, ugly, old, not good enough. I thought before I was pretty, but that changed a lot. I can't stand myself anymore when I look in the mirror. I feel a bit depressed, and ugly most of the time. I learned a lot from my very short adventure in BBW-paysite land, but NEVER EVER again "

I've done adult modeling as a small volume independent producer for a while. But I really don't see any need to participate in the Paysite board here because to be honest, what I do isn't particularly marketable to the Dimensions crowd. I'm a loser not a gainer, no longer within the "SSBBW" category, and my video content is usually more about the fun and lighter side of fetishes than fatness.

I have to say it's been a really strange trip, and I've gone on hiatus and pulled all my videos a couple of times when it started to make me feel uncomfortable or insecure.

People can completely suck when it comes to judging people involved in the adult industry. I had two former friends find my video clips and make a big deal out of it. One just called me trash and accused me of prostitution. The other made a vague threat to out me to people who "might want to know just who you really are". What I want to know is if they managed to find my work, which isn't under any name they knew me by, just what exactly were they searching for, and how does that give them the right to judge? So, I took things down and laid low until it blew over. At the time, had somebody wanted to fuck with my actual life, they could have. I decided that I would wait until it was a little bit "safer" before bringing my store back online.

I came back and got back into doing my thing and having fun with it, but after a while I started getting some static from a handful of fans and random viewers about how noticeably my body had changed from my early clips to my more recent ones. There was MUCH brou-ha-ha over the fact that my model name included the term "SSBBW" and how I was fraudulently using that term to scam and draw customers in when I was clearly not fat enough to rightfully claim the descriptor "SSBBW" any longer. Since it was such a big freaking deal to such a vocal minority, I changed my name to something that did not include BBW or SSBBW at all in order to avoid confusion as to what I really was trying to promote myself as. But I still got static over the weight loss and a lot of pressure to re-gain. At the time things were going on in my life where I didn't need any additional stress and drama, so I took it all down for a second time.

Things are better now and I'm at a place where I'm very comfortable with who I am now and who I was then. I started missing how much fun I was having with the filming and to be honest, my temp job crapped out again and having a little bit of pocket money to blow every month would be nice. So I'm getting back into it but not as deeply as before.

You have to be in a place where you are completely comfortable with who you are, and have the ability to compartmentalize the "on film you" and "real you". And have a very tough skin. You can't take the validation or invalidation seriously. Fans and customers aren't praising or rejecting you as a complete three dimensional person. It's all about the image you put out there and how they react to it.

Maybe it's easier for me because way back in the day I modeled through an agency, doing runway, print and tv commmercials, and would get rejected in interviews on a regular basis for the most nitpicky of reasons. I had an awesome agent who helped me understand that it wasn't about me as a person or whether I was attractive or not. It was about a specific image that they had in mind that I just didn't happen to match up with.

And that's okay. We can't all be everybody's cup of tea. And the fact is, the BBW adult modeling industry is extremely oversaturated. And with the internet, social media, and image sharing applications, there is NO shortage of free and easy to find photos of women of all shapes, sizes, ages, and descriptions right at a viewer's fingertips. Most people aren't paying to see pretty women, and of the pretty women they are paying to see, there are so many to go around that it's extremely difficult to stand out in the crowd.
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Old 06-22-2014, 11:36 AM   #36
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oooooooh kay... interesting story but not getting the point or how it relates to the conversation... which is cool... it's cool... do your thing :-P



Quote:
Originally Posted by Russell Williams View Post
I knew a woman who was very large and also had very large breasts. During the time I knew her she went from about 352 about 550. She wanted to be a web model but due to her husband's job he did not encourage her to do so. After she and her husband separated she became a web model. I never heard her complain about the experience.

She was a very captivating person and took pride in being able to go into a NAAFA function, decide which was the most interesting Man in the room, and leave the room with that man. Once the most interesting man went off with someone else and my friend was extremely upset when that happened.

The difficultly she had was that she got older and even with very large breasts and weighing over 500 pounds and having a delightful personality it became more difficult to attract 20 and 30-year-old men, who had money and resources, to her delightful personality, large breasts, and 50-year-old body with a limp.

Somewhere out there appears a video of her and Norma Stitz measuring their breast sizes. My friend's measurements were larger although she graciously said to Norma that my friend have a lot more back fat than Norma.
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Old 06-22-2014, 11:44 AM   #37
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this is true- when you're out there, you get a lot of feedback about how you should change yourself to meet each individual's needs- the best way to go into it is with a foundation of positivity and confidence--- if you're going in to get accolades, it's bound to be an unfulfilling experience in one form or another

as for myself, i do it for the fun of it- if it ever became "unfun" i'd wave bye bye to everyone and wish them well i am lucky tho- I've worked with two amazing ladies in the industry Jenni Bomb of BigHotbombshells and Carrie of Carrieland- both of these women are amazing supportive kickass fantastic (i need a thesaurus now)

I know I quoted you here, Tracyarts, but none of this is directed toward you- just a general observation- you sound like you've got it together to me, and I agree with a lot of what you're saying



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Originally Posted by Tracyarts View Post
" Finally I ended BBW modeling for another reason (some people found out about it and it got me in trouble) but I felt like absolute crap. Worthless, ugly, old, not good enough. I thought before I was pretty, but that changed a lot. I can't stand myself anymore when I look in the mirror. I feel a bit depressed, and ugly most of the time. I learned a lot from my very short adventure in BBW-paysite land, but NEVER EVER again "

I've done adult modeling as a small volume independent producer for a while. But I really don't see any need to participate in the Paysite board here because to be honest, what I do isn't particularly marketable to the Dimensions crowd. I'm a loser not a gainer, no longer within the "SSBBW" category, and my video content is usually more about the fun and lighter side of fetishes than fatness.

I have to say it's been a really strange trip, and I've gone on hiatus and pulled all my videos a couple of times when it started to make me feel uncomfortable or insecure.

People can completely suck when it comes to judging people involved in the adult industry. I had two former friends find my video clips and make a big deal out of it. One just called me trash and accused me of prostitution. The other made a vague threat to out me to people who "might want to know just who you really are". What I want to know is if they managed to find my work, which isn't under any name they knew me by, just what exactly were they searching for, and how does that give them the right to judge? So, I took things down and laid low until it blew over. At the time, had somebody wanted to fuck with my actual life, they could have. I decided that I would wait until it was a little bit "safer" before bringing my store back online.

I came back and got back into doing my thing and having fun with it, but after a while I started getting some static from a handful of fans and random viewers about how noticeably my body had changed from my early clips to my more recent ones. There was MUCH brou-ha-ha over the fact that my model name included the term "SSBBW" and how I was fraudulently using that term to scam and draw customers in when I was clearly not fat enough to rightfully claim the descriptor "SSBBW" any longer. Since it was such a big freaking deal to such a vocal minority, I changed my name to something that did not include BBW or SSBBW at all in order to avoid confusion as to what I really was trying to promote myself as. But I still got static over the weight loss and a lot of pressure to re-gain. At the time things were going on in my life where I didn't need any additional stress and drama, so I took it all down for a second time.

Things are better now and I'm at a place where I'm very comfortable with who I am now and who I was then. I started missing how much fun I was having with the filming and to be honest, my temp job crapped out again and having a little bit of pocket money to blow every month would be nice. So I'm getting back into it but not as deeply as before.

You have to be in a place where you are completely comfortable with who you are, and have the ability to compartmentalize the "on film you" and "real you". And have a very tough skin. You can't take the validation or invalidation seriously. Fans and customers aren't praising or rejecting you as a complete three dimensional person. It's all about the image you put out there and how they react to it.

Maybe it's easier for me because way back in the day I modeled through an agency, doing runway, print and tv commmercials, and would get rejected in interviews on a regular basis for the most nitpicky of reasons. I had an awesome agent who helped me understand that it wasn't about me as a person or whether I was attractive or not. It was about a specific image that they had in mind that I just didn't happen to match up with.

And that's okay. We can't all be everybody's cup of tea. And the fact is, the BBW adult modeling industry is extremely oversaturated. And with the internet, social media, and image sharing applications, there is NO shortage of free and easy to find photos of women of all shapes, sizes, ages, and descriptions right at a viewer's fingertips. Most people aren't paying to see pretty women, and of the pretty women they are paying to see, there are so many to go around that it's extremely difficult to stand out in the crowd.
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Old 06-22-2014, 11:54 AM   #38
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oooooooh kay... interesting story but not getting the point or how it relates to the conversation... which is cool... it's cool... do your thing :-P
Just my 2 cents: I think the lady was more emotionally vested in being an online model than perhaps she realized and with getting older and let's face it, the variety of plus size models online nowadays, I am sure it is more competitive than ever and maybe she felt like she was being left on the sidelines. I admire any of you who have the confidence to be an online model with all it entails, the positive and negative.
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Old 06-22-2014, 01:22 PM   #39
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Just my 2 cents: I think the lady was more emotionally vested in being an online model than perhaps she realized and with getting older and let's face it, the variety of plus size models online nowadays, I am sure it is more competitive than ever and maybe she felt like she was being left on the sidelines. I admire any of you who have the confidence to be an online model with all it entails, the positive and negative.
competitions a key word here. it's not just web model competition that is a danger to our well being but female competition overall to try to define ourselves and our value. when it comes to loving yourself there is no competition. being commercial can definitely put yourself in conflict with that idea. and the nature of web modeling puts women in competition, not to benefit them but to benefit the desires of strange guys with absolutely no emotional investment in them. it's often not to a client's benefit if you really like yourself. that would mean you won't go too far and even do things that are detrimental to yourself to please them--just like many other form of female competition. if you are already truly considered wonderful or consider yourself wonderful there is no competition. if you are a web model you are a product, just like a car or a video game or anything else for sale. if human individual appreciation if what you're really after far better to do something that allows you to be an individual person rather than something akin to an it.
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Old 06-22-2014, 01:28 PM   #40
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competitions a key word here. it's not just web model competition that is a danger to our well being but female competition overall to try to define ourselves and our value. when it comes to loving yourself there is no competition. being commercial can definitely put yourself in conflict with that idea. and the nature of web modeling puts women in competition, not to benefit them but to benefit the desires of strange guys with absolutely no emotional investment in them. it's often not to a client's benefit if you really like yourself. that would mean you won't go too far and even do things that are detrimental to yourself to please them--just like many other form of female competition. if you are already truly considered wonderful or consider yourself wonderful there is no competition. if you are a web model you are a product, just like a car or a video game or anything else for sale. if human individual appreciation if what you're really after far better to do something that allows you to be an individual person.
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Old 07-21-2014, 02:28 PM   #41
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Being a paysite model is not easy. I've been doing it since I was 18. only 3 yrs, but i started at a time when my confidence was SO LOW. I just got out of highschool where people tear you apart for being larger than average.
Anyways, You have to have thick skin and be completely comfortable with who you are like Saisha said above. you have to take everything with a grain of salt. When I started out, i didnt make alot, and i still know of several bigcuties, that make alot more than me, but it never stopped me! and i think your age doesnt matter. kelliekay and Ash are over 30, even though they are quite huge, age is still just a number! A large thing is being friendly and getting yourself out there, talking to people, taking time to get to know fans. I've grown to love talking with fans, and it may be hard to keep up, but it does pay off. I have realized, paysite modeling doesnt just come like "VOILA!" it takes months and months of hardwork, sometimes even a year or longer to build up a following of fans that appreciate you as a model. And you're ALWAYS going to have people judging you. so having the thick skin helps so much. when i get nasty messages calling me fat and disgusting I laugh it off. When i was 18, that stuff would hurt, but i've built up a skin, and with that skin, my confidence keeps me from getting hurt by fat shamers, or rude men. goodluck to everyone. and I'm sorry this all didnt work out for you abby. I thought you were absolutely cute! and i liked your updates. Goodluck on future ventures, whether in paysite, or not. Hugs.
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Old 07-27-2014, 01:11 PM   #42
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Originally Posted by ssbbwBrianna View Post
Being a paysite model is not easy. I've been doing it since I was 18. only 3 yrs, but i started at a time when my confidence was SO LOW. I just got out of highschool where people tear you apart for being larger than average.
Anyways, You have to have thick skin and be completely comfortable with who you are like Saisha said above. you have to take everything with a grain of salt. When I started out, i didnt make alot, and i still know of several bigcuties, that make alot more than me, but it never stopped me! and i think your age doesnt matter. kelliekay and Ash are over 30, even though they are quite huge, age is still just a number! A large thing is being friendly and getting yourself out there, talking to people, taking time to get to know fans. I've grown to love talking with fans, and it may be hard to keep up, but it does pay off. I have realized, paysite modeling doesnt just come like "VOILA!" it takes months and months of hardwork, sometimes even a year or longer to build up a following of fans that appreciate you as a model. And you're ALWAYS going to have people judging you. so having the thick skin helps so much. when i get nasty messages calling me fat and disgusting I laugh it off. When i was 18, that stuff would hurt, but i've built up a skin, and with that skin, my confidence keeps me from getting hurt by fat shamers, or rude men. goodluck to everyone. and I'm sorry this all didnt work out for you abby. I thought you were absolutely cute! and i liked your updates. Goodluck on future ventures, whether in paysite, or not. Hugs.
To be fair, you've had it a LOT easier than others I know. You first started modeling when you were 18 meaning (apart from the obligatory dickhead fat haters) you've been serenaded by males calling you beautiful the past 3 years. So at 18 years old (or earlier, depending on when you found the "community") you discovered that it was ok to be a bbw.

A lot of others were frowned upon until well into their 30's (or later). After all the internet wasn't as advanced in 2001 as it is now. There was no facebook, Skype, myspace (dating even myself here), snapchat, tumblr, flickr or any kind of social media other than yahoo groups and aol chats (which here horribly moderated and poorly represented). Size acceptance wasn't as advanced as it is now as well. As much as NAAFA meant for so long, without social media to get the word out, it was as much as underground as anything else.

The point of this is a lot of women didn't have the luxury that you have, you have been blessed with being accepted at a much younger age than others. They had to develop thick skin and a lot struggle to this day with accepting themselves because of it. I have an older cousin who lives in a different state and during a course of our conversation, size acceptance came into it. She's in her late 50's now and even though she's not really a bbw, she never had the confidence to wear the clothes my fiancée wears when she herself was young because she thought she'd be made fun of, talked about, etc. Her husband obviously saw her beauty as they've been married for many years, but its tough to imagine her going through most of her adult life being afraid of the negativity. Guess what I'm trying to say is that a lot of people are turned off from modeling because they've spent so many years trying to escape negativity and it keeps following them.

I'm glad you've found inner peace, its much better to see positivity than negativity.
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Old 12-20-2014, 10:03 PM   #43
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This whole thread was such an interesting read, especially since I just dipped my feet into the web modelling world. So far I am having so much fun with it, but it has seriously only been 2 weeks. I wonder if I'm going to feel the same 6 months later, I want to say I will, but who knows the future?
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Old 12-22-2014, 02:11 PM   #44
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I always feel bad for the BBw's that are very pretty, cute, but may not have the perfect BBW or SSBBW body. It has become VERY competitive, just like other modeling. ......Like everything in life, you give it a try, and accept the outcome..... Good for trying...Always keep trying in life.....Never give up on yourself or others....
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Old 12-27-2014, 04:27 PM   #45
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The majority of bigger women that i know are mums in their 30s or more and whilst they arent feedees nor bbw enthuiasts, they are loved for their bodies by their partners not because they ARE fat, but because they love them completely and entirely.
I see them as sexy because of their size and envy their husbands/boyfriends for finding them sexy regardless of size.
I could tell a large number of my friends (ranging from 250lbs to 400, from age 22 to 45) to model and they might do well but their hearts won't be in it because being beautiful for being themselves to their partners matters so much more.
It matters more to them because it DOES matter more.
I can enjoy their pictures because of their weight, but their boyfriends can enjoy them for the person she is - someone who eats big meals with her family, someone who goes to bars to enjoy friends company, not to be hit on by guys, someone who shows off her gorgeous body to her husband in privacy who enjoys it 20X more than a picture on the Internet.

I can enjoy your body because i find it beautiful, but it is nothing compared to the love it will get from someone who loves the whole package.

You are gorgeous and i envy the guy who gets to be with you when you order a big take out, who gets to watch you get dressed up and tells you that you are beautiful, who gets to watch you get undressed and tell you that you are beautiful, and who gets to spend weekday night sat next to you in your pyjamas with no makeup and still tells you that you are beautiful and mean it just as much.

You are gorgeous. Believe it

Daniel xxx
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Old 12-28-2014, 02:40 PM   #46
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I was so sad reading that post. I have just started my journey as a web model and I hope it's going to be an amazing experience and doesn't end up going the other way. xx
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Old 12-29-2014, 04:37 AM   #47
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Originally Posted by BCHolly View Post
I was so sad reading that post. I have just started my journey as a web model and I hope it's going to be an amazing experience and doesn't end up going the other way. xx
I know it's not kosher to talk shop around here but you're in good hands with BigCuties. I've heard nothing but good things from folks who have modeled with them.
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Old 12-30-2014, 03:35 PM   #48
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I know it's not kosher to talk shop around here but you're in good hands with BigCuties. I've heard nothing but good things from folks who have modeled with them.
thank you, I've heard good things too so hopefully all will be good. I can't wait to get started. I guess it's good reading stories about people's bad experiences as it means I can be prepared for the worst and know that these things can happen. xx
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Old 01-01-2015, 05:15 PM   #49
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thank you, I've heard good things too so hopefully all will be good. I can't wait to get started. I guess it's good reading stories about people's bad experiences as it means I can be prepared for the worst and know that these things can happen. xx
i'd say be careful of absolutely anyone as you would in any job. anybody can get caught up.

I suggest you look very judgmentally at the situation of the people around you and consider accordingly. are they doing well in terms of health or are they on the decline? have there been a lot of deaths? are they living socially alienated lives? what are their finances really like? do they or have they had to rely on public assistance? are they dependent on you for their living?

question everything ANYONE tells you. research by quietly asking other people who've been around for very long time. ask enough questions of enough people and the true story will eventually emerge. truly intuition is good. if you have uncomfortable feelings run!

always follow the money. in absolutely every situation figure out who financially benefits most. if it's not you run!

don't trust fans. most, especially newbies, have absolutely no real idea what's going on. they will always tell you to do it because you are a beautiful girl and they want to see you. that is their MO. other than that they could care less about your outcome. they're big talkers but for the most part
(99.9999%) if something happens you can't rely on them for anything even well wishes --as many have sadly learned.

find some ex models to talk to who have no financial benefit one way or another and are doing something totally different now. if they were dealing with nice people they'll tell you even if they decided to do something else. if they were not they have the freedom to tell you that too.

a lot work like pimps. they'll try to find out what you're lacking in your life and dangle it in front of you. they will pretend to be family, parents, friends or even a lover if that's what you want or need . so be very careful of emotional manipulation and the dependence they can encourage. don't reveal too much personal stuff about yourself to them or their friends.
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Old 01-01-2015, 06:43 PM   #50
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G'day BC holly,

I will tell you what I told my fiance when she was considering becoming a model. Distance yourself from fans/ppl in general-you don't want anyone and everyone looking up your Facebook page, one of the main things Abby mentioned was that family found out about her being a model and they gave her a hard time about it, assume that your friends and family have access to your content; because hiding it from them is pretty much impossible. Not all guys are arseholes(that being said some sure are). Please remember, once you post content on the net it's out there for ever.
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