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Old 09-10-2014, 07:57 AM   #1
Robukfa
 
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Default Your FA Friend

My fiancé and I were joking around last night and she asked if I had three wishes for our wedding what would they be. In a silly mood I responded “a dance troupe of big beautiful girls to do some exotic/burlesque dancing.” Then, without thinking I used the second wish to bestow all the male guests with awesome FA-ness! The conversation then steered towards my friends and their actual preferences. I didn’t make a third wish.

We discussed this and I came to realise that I’ve never actually been in the presence of other FA’s and enjoyed mutual appreciation and admiration of larger girls (save for the odd online meet-up). I remember being at a rugby club event several years ago and the stage was set with four stools for gentlemen to sit on whilst young girls danced for them provocatively. Of course, the entire marquee was raucous with wolf whistles and jeering blokes, and my then colleagues decided to buy me a dance. Having no choice in the matter I proceeded to the stage and the (very pleasant to talk to) girl did her thing with all my mates cheering. However, I may as well have been elsewhere as I really wasn’t interested. I could recognise that she was attractive to most of the other men but my radar wasn’t receiving.

Thinking of this incident, there are times when I am sat outside the pub and a group of pretty but thin/average build girls go by. All of my companions heads turn and I will look too, but I can’t enjoy that mutual desire or lust they feel. They all know I like big girls, and when I got together with my fiancé early last year that helped establish to what degree.

But what dismayed me is that I’ve had no-one to share the experience of admiring big beautiful girls with, mutually appreciating them like you would if you were accompanied by similar mined folk to enjoy an art exhibition, fine foods and wines or the performance of a favourite piece of music by one of the world’s best conductors. Something that everyone in your party was passionate about.

I'm lucky that my girl loves my appreciation of her body so I get to display my feelings and desires. When she moved in last year she found my copy of “Big Big Love” and read it from cover to cover. She loved it and thankfully had had a positive upbringing on body size and had never had a problem with her size, but the book filled in the FA gaps. Therefore, we have a very solid relationship and she teases me about FA issues and big girls a lot.

So, my having an FA friend would not be a vehicle for me to meet another BBW. It would be somebody who I could relate to on FA (and BBW) issues. They might be taken or they might be still looking for their lady. But it would be interesting to discuss things with a man of similar tastes in women, like most of my friends do. It must be liberating to say, “you know what? I love that too!” I have friends that like very thin girls and some like curvy and chubby ladies, but I have none that like fat girls.

Can any of you relate to this? I know there are other FA’s out there, but I’ve not met any locally. Do you have a regular fellow FA friend? What pursuits do you enjoy as pals?
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Old 09-10-2014, 03:01 PM   #2
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I've often wished for one, for the same sort of reasons. I'm sure FA exist in my vicinity, but it seems like an odd sort of way to pursue friendship, you know? And to be honest the friends I spend my time with are built around a core of people I got to know when I was twelve (with others having become attached to the group over the years), and at this point in my life I don't really have the time and ambition to go out and find a second set of friends, so it doesn't seem overly likely in my case.....but sound younger and at a more transitional point in your life, so it could be a good time!

(even better, from my POV, would be us as a couple knowing another FA/BBW couple)
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Old 09-10-2014, 10:23 PM   #3
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I don't have a lot of friends outside of the community that are into big women, but because my preference is more of a range of shapes among a range of sizes, I can sometimes find a sort of middle ground when it comes to interpretations of "curvy" or "thick." Lately when I've mentioned my preferences, most of my coworkers/friends become curious rather than demeaning. I often get the whole "What do you think of her?" question thrown at me. I've had some people question their preferences as well as question mine during these moments. Those middle ground events fill the gap most of the time, but I've met some FAs over the years who I enjoy hearing the perspective of.

I've learned to expect this feeling over time though. Not because of my preferences that I am fully comfortable with, but in the way that I express myself.
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Old 09-11-2014, 05:29 AM   #4
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I don't have a group of friends that grew up with me. What I have is several groups where I am a occasional company and a select group of closer friends. There are several groups of people that I see as occasional "beer friends" and in one of those groups there is an FA. A very nice guy that makes a living as a martial arts instructor and is married to a SSBBW.

When I go out with this group, there are two FA's, and like the other guys we (that are married) point a beautiful woman from time to time. It is interesting because the other guys not only respect this but from time to time even point up a girls (joking or not) and say something like "that one is for you" ...
I think that being an FA is a problem while you are trying to hide it. If you are open and secure about it, people will respect that side of your personality in the same way they respect your religion and life choices. Not a big deal at all ...
If you want advice on that, just have the exact same attitude your friend have towards the woman they find atractive to the women you do find atractive.
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Old 09-11-2014, 06:06 AM   #5
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I admit it would be quite nice to have a FFA friend. I don't have a lot of friends and the ones I do have aren't the type to talk about their preferences or people they find attractive and what not. Possibly because most of my friends are guys and they don't tend to talk about those sort of things with girls? I am not sure. My few female friends don't really talk about these things either, but they are all attracted to skinny men in some way or another.

I wish I had someone I could swoon over BHM with. But I don't know anyone I would be awkward swooning around, regardless of the object of my desires.
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Old 09-11-2014, 07:08 AM   #6
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Having an FFA friend would be amazing. I feel like i missed out on key girl bonding. Girls spend an inordinant amount of time talking about boys - because of my preferences i just avoided those conversations, and suffered through while unable to...

Now that i am older i am comfortable just telling them outright i like fat guys, but i can tell it makes them uncomfortable...though they dont seem to get how uncomfortable their talk of weight loss and abs make me.

I think that purposefully seeking an FFA friend would be odd for me, yet secretly it is a huge wish.

Ironically, i know three FAs - so at least i can admire their BBW with them...but it isnt the same as curling up with popcorn and being silly with a girl.
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Old 09-11-2014, 07:23 AM   #7
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Xyantha raises a good point.....I hold in my FA thoughts because they make others uncomfortable--why say stuff that doesn't further a conversation and makes them uncomfortable?

I figure the dual pleasures of having an FA friend would be just feeling less odd (in this regard at least), and feeling comfortable expressing more of my thoughts.
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