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Old 04-19-2016, 02:36 PM   #26
loopytheone
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Originally Posted by dwesterny View Post
I don't claim to have overcome completely, but I've come very far. It's also harder if you're really huge. At close to 500 I get jaw dropped looks and visible disgust from strangers. But fuck them. Without question my weight is the first thing anyone who looks at me for the first time thinks of. Luckily some wonderful creatures think it's sexy rather than disgusting, it was nice to learn that was possible.

I should note almost every FFA I have talked acknowledges that not every fatty can get over it. Some who are forced to hunt wild fatties are terrified of it. Of course I tend to talk to smart self-aware FFAs, so that makes sense I guess.
I can tell in the way that you talk about yourself that you have come far and it is awesome to see. You're adorable and awesome, after all.

You are definitely right that not everybody can overcome these things. At the end of the day, that was one of the main reasons me and my ex fiancee split up. He could never really accept himself or get over his own self-hatred about his size so he kinda flew between being awed and happy that I found him so attractive and thinking of me as horrible and manipulative for liking him as he was. I dunno if maybe other FFAs could cope with that long term but I definitely couldn't and I try and stay as far away from people like that as possible these days.
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Old 04-20-2016, 01:27 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by Tad View Post
I didn't think Xy's post overlooked anything around the causes -- in that it wasn't addressing causes at all, just commenting on the end effect.
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Originally Posted by Xyantha Reborn View Post
Correct.
I'm sorry Xy - I misinterpreted the NEED in your first post - as to it being a more volontary element.

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Originally Posted by dwesterny View Post
Again I think the main difference is between feeling "I hate being fat because everyone thinks negatively about me for it" vs saying "Everyone is right to think poorly of me and I deserve to be treated that way". A lot easier to recover from the first than from the second.
The latter probably is the particularly perfidious element in fat shaming. Most overweight people (the vast majority which is in the BMI range 25-35) actually suffers more from the stigma attached to being overweight than the actual weight and it's effects. That is also what leads to such perverted thought patterns and makes it so difficult to overcome these mental and psychological mindcuffs.
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Old 04-24-2016, 06:35 PM   #28
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Through my experience, often times through repetition one can usually get even the most self-conscious fat guy to become more comfortable with their size...to a degree. That's the important part to remember. Some people just can't fully overcome it and the wall only goes down so much before they start to pull away. So it becomes a cycle of balancing what they are comfortable with, without overstepping a line. As someone who's been in that situation, it requires a lot of restraint on the ffas side. I know this isn't the original intent of the post, but it went in this direction so I felt like adding my two cents.
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