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Old 06-04-2016, 06:58 PM   #51
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Originally Posted by happily_married View Post
How can you verify this? I think it happens both ways, but to make a statement that it is more prevalent one way or the other I am not certain can be verified beyond "my observations."
Women initiate over 70% of divorces today and are far more likely to express marital dissatisfaction. Quality of intimate relations is often an issue once a woman no longer finds her mate attractive (guys are more forgiving -- the old adage that guys will fuck anything can actually work to keep marriages together).
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Old 06-04-2016, 10:03 PM   #52
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Women initiate over 70% of divorces today and are far more likely to express marital dissatisfaction. Quality of intimate relations is often an issue once a woman no longer finds her mate attractive (guys are more forgiving -- the old adage that guys will fuck anything can actually work to keep marriages together).
LOL.. sure men are more forgiving.. that is why they cheat on their wives and go for a newer model. That is extremely forgiving. lol..

Fact of the matter is.. these days women might initiate more divorces because they know they don't have to stay in a crappy marriage if it is not working for them because they can make their own money.
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Old 06-05-2016, 12:24 AM   #53
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LOL.. sure men are more forgiving.. that is why they cheat on their wives and go for a newer model. That is extremely forgiving. lol..

Fact of the matter is.. these days women might initiate more divorces because they know they don;t have to stay in a crappy marriage if it is not working for them because they can make their own money.
Actually women cheat just as much as men: about 20 percent of both men and women copped to having cheated on their current partners.

http://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/female-infidelity

And lack of sexual satisfaction is a major reason women consider their marriages crappy. This of course is often related to a woman no longer finding her partner sexy.

The trope of guys trading in their wives for a newer model is not as common as many think and is generally limited to very rich men with conservative attitudes (often with weird orange hair).
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Old 06-05-2016, 05:37 AM   #54
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Women initiate over 70% of divorces today and are far more likely to express marital dissatisfaction. Quality of intimate relations is often an issue once a woman no longer finds her mate attractive (guys are more forgiving -- the old adage that guys will fuck anything can actually work to keep marriages together).
That may be true once a guy is already in a relationship. It certainly is not universal though: I know more than a few women who have been dumped over weight gain resulting. That women initiate more divorces doesn't even remotely support your argument: you have to take a sample and discern cause from effect. Due to the positive vs normative nature of your statements I suspected you were either ready to support your argument with such analysis or more likely, ultimately just relying on anecdotal evidence and a couple broad-brush statistics.

But for the sake of discussion, let's say men are less likely to leave a relationship after a woman puts on some weight. Let's say they want to but they don't do it. That is a bold assumption, but let's make it for the sake of the conversation. It still does not speak to initial attraction. And when it comes to getting one's foot in the door, I think society is still a lot more draconian toward overweight women than overweight men. That women who have a BHM for a partner do not get the same castigation as men who have a fat woman for a partner seems to support this. I've seen a lot out there to suggest any man who wants to date a fat woman must be himself undesirable in some way shape or form. I don't see the same degree of this logic applied to women who like bigger men. It's still just personal observation, but it's reinforced by a lot of people both here on Dims (and other similar forums) as well as many places in every day life. Friends, coworkers, relatives, etc. When it comes to initial attraction, fat women seem to have it much harder than fat men.

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Originally Posted by bigmac View Post
Actually women cheat just as much as men: about 20 percent of both men and women copped to having cheated on their current partners.

http://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/female-infidelity

And lack of sexual satisfaction is a major reason women consider their marriages crappy. This of course is often related to a woman no longer finding her partner sexy.
What these "skin deep" stats don't show you is cause and effect. Why do women consider their marriages crappy? You attempt to answer that with the bolded statement but so far in this discussion that seems to be a matter of your personal bias and interpretation.

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The trope of guys trading in their wives for a newer model is not as common as many think and is generally limited to very rich men with conservative attitudes (often with weird orange hair).
Again, I challenge you to support with data, retract your statements (or at a minimum walk back to a degree that you recognize your position is not universally right), or be dismissed as one with an ax to grind, especially now that you've introduced your political biases into the discussion.
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Old 10-07-2016, 06:50 AM   #55
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Its been my experience that the majority of BBWs would much rather hookup with a thin guy.
That was my experience too.
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Old 01-28-2017, 10:23 AM   #56
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I'm really not sure how other FAs are perceived. I have no experience with being thin, or with how thin people are treated relative to how I'm treated. I think this may be a hard issue to address, since very few people have experienced both, or can make the comparison accurately.

Speaking personally, I gained weight because I needed cheering up, and being able to squeeze my soft upper arms always works to cheer me up when I need it. Also, it makes me feel like less of a hypocrite, which is always nice. I'm not aware that my weight has interfered with anything romantically, though. There are bigger issues that tend to get in the way first.
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Old 01-29-2017, 05:11 PM   #57
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Speaking personally, I gained weight because I needed cheering up, and being able to squeeze my soft upper arms always works to cheer me up when I need it. Also, it makes me feel like less of a hypocrite, which is always nice. I'm not aware that my weight has interfered with anything romantically, though. There are bigger issues that tend to get in the way first.
Same with me.
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Old 02-06-2017, 07:56 AM   #58
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I'm a BBW and an FFA. As somebody who is asexual, I don't have a lot of physical desires but I've always been attracted to fat people in general, even as a kid. It is hard for me to be physically attracted to weight/fatness but not to the person as a whole without feeling like an objectifying creep, but as I've gotten older I've finally learnt to reconcile these two things in my head. It is okay to watch videos and look at pictures of people that they put into the public domain to be admired and fantasised over by strangers. You have their consent to admire their bodies. And as for being in relationships, the fact that I'm not sexually attracted to them as a whole is okay too; it doesn't make my love for them and their charm and their heart and their beauty any less valid and real. This realisation, combined with looking back at pictures of myself, made me realise something else.

I have always been fixated on fat, even as a little kid, and that is okay. That is why, growing up, I always saw myself as fat and huge even though, looking at photos etc... I was a very scrawny child and teenager. I was just super focused on what little softness I did have, ever since I was a kid. And now I understand that I can come to accept that I like being bigger, that I like being soft and full and round. I don't have to beat myself up about it or hate myself for liking it anymore. I am fat, and I like fat, I like my partners to be fat and I love people, fat or thin, for being who they are on the inside, nothing else. Cliche though that might be. And once I love you, as a person... it doesn't matter what you look like, you will be gorgeous to me. And I damn well expect that if you are my partner, you find my fat-ass self every bit as gorgeous as well.
Very well said
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