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Old 09-30-2005, 10:27 AM   #1
Renaissance Man
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Post A Look at Feederism

I very much appreciate waitingforsuperman’s de-lurking post, which was eloquent about his view on feederism, as well. Since this is the Weight Board, more discussion about the eroticism of weight gain should be in order. This is the safe haven to which many of us sailed when the Internet was still “new” and many of us felt—and perhaps still feel—misunderstood.

Therefore, I’d like to share a page from my website. I wrote this back in 1998 after trading several e-mails with the one-and-only Paul Delacroix. (And yes, I also stand in awe that you can connect with someone you've admired. It’s silly, but it never ceases to amaze me that some of the artists and models we see on the Internet—celebrities of the BBW/FA world—are actually real people that respond to you!)
___________________________________________

Feederism Explained

Disclaimer: It has been brought to my attention that, in the course of conversations where my name comes up, someone says, “Oh, he’s a feeder.” This comment usually makes the person who doesn’t know me scared or apprehensive. Why? Probably because: (1) they don’t understand feederism and the fact that it has different facets, (2) they haven’t read what I think about the subject, (3) the person who made the comment doesn’t really know me, because my friends know that I am not out to fatten women up, and (4) the person who made the comment is probably assuming too much, if they know that I wrote this essay—which means they didn’t read it thoroughly.

Feederism. The very word strikes fear and anger in the hearts and minds of many. A great deal of antagonism is directed towards anyone who brings up the subject, much less admits to having some kind of attachment to the word. Well, I’d like to take a moment to discuss the subject the way I see it.

Feederism is not necessarily a perversion. I consider myself to be an intelligent, well-rounded, well-adjusted individual—and the idea of a woman becoming a little fatter, softer, and sexier makes me excited. Hey, I didn’t choose to be this way. It wasn’t a conscious decision. It’s just the way I’m made.

(By the way, that doesn’t mean that I am going to actually try to make anyone gain weight. I’ll explain later.)

Note: Feederism can be a perversion if someone takes it too far. Unfortunately, there are those that do. More on that later.

Feederism has different facets. From what I can tell, feederism comes in different forms, just like humans (imagine that). I believe there are different categories of feeders: encouragers, true feeders, forcers, immobilizers, and fantasy feeders. Let me explain:
  • Encouragers are those people who do not go out of their way to put food down the throat of their loved one or object of their feeding. They make sure that food is available and will try to make the feedee feel at ease with their eating, as well as their body.

  • True Feeders actually like to watch the feedee put food in their mouth. They get excited by watching the person chewing and reaching for more food, slowly “putting it away.” They also enjoy the act of feeding food to the person. While the act of feeding someone can be a sensuous experience for anyone, the feeder really enjoys it—it’s a potent, irresistible form of foreplay.

  • Forcers are those people who actually like the idea of forcing their feedee to eat. Forcing includes tying or binding the feedee to a chair, bed, or contraption of some sort. The forced eating can come by hand, funnel, or possibly intravenously (IV). The feedee in this case can be either a willing participant or not.

  • Immobilizers are those feeders who won’t stop until their feedee is unable or nearly unable to move. The subject is bed-ridden or contraption-ridden (something on which they reside so that they can actually get wheeled around). We’re not talking supersized here—we’re talking enormous.

  • Fantasy Feeders are those people who only really enjoy the dream or idea of a feedee gaining weight. These feeders don’t actively pursue a feedee or get a feedee to gain. They are just as happy that their mate or loved one is whatever size they are. Play acting is always fun, though.
As far as I am concerned, encouragers, true feeders, and fantasy feeders are harmless. Forcers and immobilizers, however, are “pushing the envelope.” If both adults know what they are getting into and agree that they would both enjoy pushing the envelope, then that is their decision. However, some of these feeders—the ones that are mean-spirited about it or just in it for themselves and do not care about the other person—give feederism a bad name.

As for me, feeding is purely a fantasy. I have never attempted to make any woman fatter, nor will I try unless she’d like to do that herself. Personally, I don’t get all “hot and bothered” by watching a woman eat (unless it’s intentionally erotic, which I’ll get into in a moment). I discovered early on that I was excited by the notion of it. I read some stories in magazines and found myself becoming quite turned on. So, basically, I am a Fantasy Feeder.

My woman would always have control of her body. I would never force her to do anything. If she wants to lose some weight, so be it. The idea of her getting softer doesn’t imply that she has to gain 100+ pounds. However, it would be cool to watch her get too big for some of her clothes—and like it! I’d love to see her flaunt it, and enjoy watching my reaction. If I were to end up with a skinny woman who actually liked the idea of gaining weight for me, I would then be an Encourager (for a while, until she reached a nice weight that we both enjoyed.)

Am I looking to start such a relationship with a woman who is already supersized? Not necessarily. Am I out to fatten up a presently skinny woman? No, it’s just a fantasy. Would I object if it actually happened? No!

Since the process of intentionally eating to become fat is a purely fantastical pleasure, my woman wouldn’t have to gorge herself until she was near bursting. All she’d have to do is enjoy a large dessert, taunting and teasing me while she enjoys every bite. All she’d have to do is eat several bites very sensuously, saying “Mmmm, honey, I’m getting fatter because of all this luscious dessert. Do you want me to get fatter? I do, so I’m eating all of this. Then I’m going to want some more. Every bite is going right to my thighs. I want the next plateful to go my ass. Ooo, I can feel my boobs getting fuller. Want to get me another piece of dessert, honey?”

I’d be putty in her hands if she did that . . .

[Okay, now that it has been some time since I first wrote this, the above two paragraphs sound a little silly. While I can’t say that I actually expect anyone to say anything like that to me, the point is that the woman would let me know that she realizes that what she’s eating is fattening and doesn’t care. I guess I just like a woman who feels comfortable occasionally seducing me, whether it has to do with eating or not, that’s all.]

Another—and probably the most effective—way she could seduce me would be by wearing clothes that are too tight. If she were to wear a pair of jeans that she couldn’t zip shut, I’d be in fantasy heaven. Her clothes would only have to simply that she’s gained weight. I remember a model several years ago that chronicled her active weight gain through her layouts—a woman named Sabrina.

At first, she just had a typical layout. She was a pretty plumper, somewhat hourglassed, but leaning on the pear-shaped side. As other layouts ensued, she became fatter, softer, and just plain sexier. She could melt you with a “come hither” look, and weaken your knees with beautiful face. Her long, auburn hair was always long, flowing, and slightly wavy. Her features were highlighted with only a hint of make-up. But the best part were her outfits.

When she was noticeably gaining, she wore some jean cut-off shorts. A couple of layouts later, she wore them again—unbuttoned and unzipped. Her belly was hanging out of them, obviously having outgrown the short more than one size ago. To top it off, she had parted the shorts along the seam and loosely stitched them up with a wide criss-crossing pattern using leather string or shoelaces. You could see that her already meaty thighs had become more voluminous, wider, and laden with cellulite. The seams were parted, allowing you to see at least a two-inch gap of thigh flesh. What a turn on.

Sabrina disappeared off the modeling circuit. She will always be remembered not only for her beautiful face, but also for her proud flaunting of her weight-gain, there for all the world to see.

So, dear reader, feederism doesn’t have to be a scary subject. It doesn’t have to be a political issue within the Size Acceptance movement. If some people actually play it out, let them. If some people just want to fantasize about it, let them. We’re not out to change the world or create some sick society of immobile individuals (but there may be some that do). We’re human, just like you. We just have different fantasies, that’s all.

So, any ladies care for some cheesecake?

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Last edited by Renaissance Man; 09-30-2005 at 10:30 AM. Reason: spacing issues
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Old 09-30-2005, 10:46 AM   #2
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Very good post. Thank you.
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Old 09-30-2005, 10:47 AM   #3
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Thanks for the great post, man.
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Old 09-30-2005, 11:06 AM   #4
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I stated my view in another posts:

"As for finding the thought of weight gain erotic, well, that is a fantasy shared by many. I think the crucial point is realizing that there is a big difference between fantasies and realities. Everyone has fantasies, and some of them are quite unusual. I've always felt that what goes on between two consenting adults is no one's business but theirs. The line should be drawn when someone is trying to impose something on another person against their will. That should never happen, and it is certainly not the basis for any kind of relationship. In the same respect, it is in the very nature of fantasies that they sometimes need a bit of explaining so they can be shared and enjoyed with a partner. It all comes down to common sense. Some folks are trying to demonize fantasies they do not agree with. That is just plain wrong. As long as fantasies are between consenting adults and as long as they are safe, sane, and consentual, the thought police should back off."

As you all know, Dimensions has often been attacked for being "pro-feeder" when, in fact, I simply alllowed discussion of the topic, both pro and con. That, of course, has never stopped some people from assigning labels to me personally, in the best "whatever is in the magazine or on the website must be Conrad's personal opinion." Not so. Both Dimensions and I simply stand for Freedom of Fantasy as long as they are, as stated above, safe, sane, and consentual.

I also know that a good number of men who publicly are vocal critics of the weight gain genre of fantasy are, in fact, into it on a personal level, and sometimes to a considerable degree. There is quite a bit of hypocrisy going on in that regard.
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Old 09-30-2005, 11:26 AM   #5
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Ren Man, I can't tell you how perfectly you're post fits my own views of feederism and weight gain, like Em and WFS said, thank you, broham, seriously.
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Old 09-30-2005, 11:40 AM   #6
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When I first join the SA movement (many many moons ago) I was very critical of Feederism - simply because I did not understand it. Now - having been married to an FA for almost 13 years - and understanding his fantasies - I no longer think it's harmful. In fact I think in most cases it's quite innocent fun.

Hey I grew up with an Italian mama who was constantly feeding me. How come that was about love - but hubby having a fantasy about feeding me is considered a bad thing by many?

I think it's innocent - and for some men it may well be a way of showing their love.

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Old 09-30-2005, 09:09 PM   #7
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Wink Excellent account!

It really captures so much of the breadth (pun intended!) and depth of our way of life in a short space! When I wrote my now infamous article about my own weightgain experience "The Disciples of Flesh" for the first AMOK press edition of "Apocalypse Culture" way back in 1986, I framed it in terms that I now regret, because I did put it into a much more radical and challenging form than most folks would find appealing. I got a few positive responses when it first came out during the early 90's and the article has been quoted many times when feeding and gaining hit the news, but I have always wondered about the possibility that if I had toned it down considerably whether it wouldn't have given more of an impetus to today's much broader (again, pun intended!) community of gainers, feeders, encouragers, etc. Well....I suppose I may never find out, but I have enjoyed many years of gaining, myself and enjoying the gain of others, so it has been anything but a wasted experience!
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Old 09-30-2005, 09:52 PM   #8
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If one loves fat, it's not that big of a jump to love the activity that makes the fat accumulate.

One must, of course, not get greedy. Greed's destroyed relationships I could have had in the past, and it's simply asking for too much, too soon. (Yes, that's an apology to anyone it may apply to... I'm aware of my own insanities from time to time...)

But if it's not greed at play, but instead mutually agreed-upon exploration, then have at it! Some will think of it, others will practice it, some just play at it. It's a big, crazy world, and as long as you have the right way to communicate when enough is enough and your partner(s) respect that, you'll have a fine time of things.
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Old 10-01-2005, 05:35 AM   #9
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I think the opening post was very well put.
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Old 10-01-2005, 01:22 PM   #10
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I remember reading this when it first appeared on the web - and thinking that you nailed quite a few aspects of the subject quite well. The only thing I would add to your description of fantasy is the existence of fanta-sizing fiction and art out there that isn't even connected to feeding or eating - it's something that happens through other forces, placing the focus more on the process of gaining weight and on the physicality of fatness than on forced or unforced gluttony. A certain number of FAs who wouldn't consider themselves feeders in any way enjoy these types of stories - I've written more than a few along with my share of gluttony tales, and I think they stand in an interesting space on the FA continuum . . .
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Old 10-01-2005, 04:02 PM   #11
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Jay Tee's excellent "Dice Games" come to mind as an example.
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Old 10-02-2005, 10:34 PM   #12
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Hey Renn Man!!

Very articulate and thoughtful post. But then you are a thoughtful kind of fellow. Understanding is so important, and I am so glad you took the time to express your feelings here. Hopefully more ladies will see this and realize that most of you darling FAs are quite fun and not too dangerous!

Hugs!!

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Old 10-03-2005, 04:57 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sandie S-R
Hey Renn Man!!

Very articulate and thoughtful post. But then you are a thoughtful kind of fellow. Understanding is so important, and I am so glad you took the time to express your feelings here. Hopefully more ladies will see this and realize that most of you darling FAs are quite fun and not too dangerous!

Hugs!!
Hey, Sandie!!

Thanks so much for the lovely response, hon. Geez, how long has it been? 6 years? Nice to, uh, “see” you again....in a....cyber, uh, virtual....kind of way. (I’d much rather see you in person. LOL Hope you are well!

Hugs back!
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Old 02-07-2007, 06:10 PM   #14
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Wonderfully said.. thanks...
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Old 02-07-2007, 06:49 PM   #15
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Wow, that might be the biggest necro I've ever seen on any forum!

Sokay though, because that initial post is pretty spot on.
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Old 02-07-2007, 06:50 PM   #16
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Interesting post - I enjoyed reading this. I am actually interested in this very topic, so thank you for shedding some light.
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Old 02-07-2007, 06:53 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Accept View Post
Wow, that might be the biggest necro I've ever seen on any forum!

Sokay though, because that initial post is pretty spot on.
Yeah, it's almost as far back as you can go on these boards - they only opened about a month before that! We were on the old BBS system before that.
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