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Old 02-27-2007, 09:07 PM   #1
Happy FA
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Default A Day in the Life.... of an FA

Rushing to the train, anxious on a Friday evening to catch my 643 train, in a hurry to escape from the city to my suburban hideaway, looking forward to settling into a comfy seat with an open seat next to me, sipping my iced tea, and listening on my iPod Shuffle to the live version of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the the Moon that I saw Roger Waters perform a few months ago at Madison Square Garden, while finishing up a particularly dastardly Friday New York Times crossword puzzle… and then, all of a sudden the eyes so anxiously forwardly oriented took a hard left turn.

Standing there, casually, leaning against the railing at the end of the platform, chatting to a non-descript mid 20ish guy was a goddess. A woman of such size and presence that my knees wobbled, my stride broke and my breath caught in my throat. Probably 5’8”, probably North of 580 pounds and with a smile on her face and a coat that was unbuttoned and whose buttons appeared to be in excess of a foot from their buttonholes. An apple shaped woman of such scintillating scope and scale that my brain seemed unwilling to process the inputs coming in from the optic nerve.

As my eyes drank in all the details they could imbibe in the fractions of a moment as I carried past this monumental miss, chugging frame after frame of detail for later processing, I sensed the gargantuan girth of this girl’s globular grandness. Despite her winter overcoat it was clear that her amazing width and depth extended from her shoulders to below her natural waistline. Her alluring face was very full but not otherwise affected by her size.

And then I was by her and I counted down the perhaps ten seconds until I reached the first door of the train which I would enter, and at which time I would casually turn, pause and get another look at this spirit of the station….

So, I turned… and looked, and she was gone, like a mirage that had never been and perhaps was a figment of my overworked, overtired and overwraught imagination. I stopped for a second, scanning the crowd the 50 feet I’d traveled and the additional 50 feet to the exit to the hallways of the terminal, but no sign of this behemothically billowy babe was to be had. After a second sweep of the eyes, I turned, found my comfy seat, listened to my awesome tunes, sipped my iced tea and finished the crossword puzzle, … but there was an emptiness…
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Old 02-27-2007, 09:15 PM   #2
Chimpi
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I would like to have lived that day. The rush, the feel, the anxiety, the total pleasure of all of it! I would have LOVED to have lived that day - when you went to see Roger Waters perform live a few months ago.
I want to touch you. I am in awe.
You lucky son-of-a-gun.
By the way, I know how you feel on the presence of a woman of such size. It's undaunting.
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Old 02-27-2007, 10:30 PM   #3
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Sometimes I think these spotting stories are the FA equivalent of a Fishing story. But still I have to give you respect for writting the sighting in an intresting manner instead of "yo! home slices! I saw this fattie who had the biggest butt ever man!".
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Old 02-27-2007, 10:47 PM   #4
Jon Blaze
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Happy FA View Post
Rushing to the train, anxious on a Friday evening to catch my 643 train, in a hurry to escape from the city to my suburban hideaway, looking forward to settling into a comfy seat with an open seat next to me, sipping my iced tea, and listening on my iPod Shuffle to the live version of Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the the Moon that I saw Roger Waters perform a few months ago at Madison Square Garden, while finishing up a particularly dastardly Friday New York Times crossword puzzle… and then, all of a sudden the eyes so anxiously forwardly oriented took a hard left turn.

Standing there, casually, leaning against the railing at the end of the platform, chatting to a non-descript mid 20ish guy was a goddess. A woman of such size and presence that my knees wobbled, my stride broke and my breath caught in my throat. Probably 5’8”, probably North of 580 pounds and with a smile on her face and a coat that was unbuttoned and whose buttons appeared to be in excess of a foot from their buttonholes. An apple shaped woman of such scintillating scope and scale that my brain seemed unwilling to process the inputs coming in from the optic nerve.

As my eyes drank in all the details they could imbibe in the fractions of a moment as I carried past this monumental miss, chugging frame after frame of detail for later processing, I sensed the gargantuan girth of this girl’s globular grandness. Despite her winter overcoat it was clear that her amazing width and depth extended from her shoulders to below her natural waistline. Her alluring face was very full but not otherwise affected by her size.

And then I was by her and I counted down the perhaps ten seconds until I reached the first door of the train which I would enter, and at which time I would casually turn, pause and get another look at this spirit of the station….

So, I turned… and looked, and she was gone, like a mirage that had never been and perhaps was a figment of my overworked, overtired and overwraught imagination. I stopped for a second, scanning the crowd the 50 feet I’d traveled and the additional 50 feet to the exit to the hallways of the terminal, but no sign of this behemothically billowy babe was to be had. After a second sweep of the eyes, I turned, found my comfy seat, listened to my awesome tunes, sipped my iced tea and finished the crossword puzzle, … but there was an emptiness…
"That was poetry... And I'm not talking about Shakespeare either."
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