Dimensions Forums  
Home Register Premium Membership Stories Ye Olde Library Health Issues Market Place Big Fashion

Go Back   Dimensions Forums > Discussion > BBW Forum



Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 01-17-2006, 12:20 PM   #26
SilkyAngela
runs with scissors
 
SilkyAngela's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 469
SilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticed
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by TraciJo67
I am no longer a fat woman, but I have lived that experience, and it will forever be a part of me. In many ways, I feel more at home here than I have ever felt in the mainstream. And I've met many wonderful people who have accepted me unconditionally, just as I am.
I have been a long time lurker of this board (and the one before it) and this thread was my first post in the main forum. I only just met you, but already I feel I know you by what you have shared today and I want to thank you for sharing, sometimes even yesterday's pain can feel fresh and new when you talk about it. Also I am sorry that you or anyone has been made to feel the way you did on your travels.
I may be new here Traci, but I accept you without condition, just as you are.
__________________
"For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.” -Ivan Panin

:smitten: Because every body matters. SizePositiveTV
I get bloggy wit it. :D The Sweet Spot
SilkyAngela is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 12:38 PM   #27
LillyBBBW
Wig Snatcher
 
LillyBBBW's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 9,794
LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by TraciJo67
Lilly, I never claimed - or even implied - that a size 14 is skinny. To some FA's, it certainly would be; it's all a matter of perspective, isn't it?
I'm sorry I credited you with that comment Traci. Once I got on a role in making my point I began to generalize a bit too much.

I had the same problem when I traveled to the Hong Kong and to Japan. I had mentally prepared myself in advance, knowing that I was going to get stares and people acting out. Because of this the reactions I saw didn't happen nearly as badly or as often as I expected. People looked but no one did anything improper or rude. If they did they kept it to themselves in their own language. What I didn't expect was the strong reactions I got from the merchants in the area who were mostly of Indian decent. They couldn't get enough of me and would ogle and whistle openly while ignoring the rest of my travel clan.

One of my friends actually got worse attention than I did though. He's a very tall black gentleman and everywhere we went everyone mistook him for Michael Jordan though he bears no resemblance at all. It drove him mad. I can also recall a similar story told by Sandy Sabo-Russo about a trip she took to Hawaii with her husband where a group of Japanese vacationers harassed her like she was merely a display on the roadside until her husband had words with them.

We saw Goldie Hawn and Kirk Douglas casually walking down the street holding hands and window shopping in Kowloon. Nobody payed them any attention, something they would never be able to do on Main Street here in the states. It was cool! It's funny how culture plays a role in how a fat and/or thin woman is seen.
__________________
Expecting the world to treat you kindly because you are a good person is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

"...If the only pain you recognize as valid is your own, of course you'll have trouble identifying it when you see it in other people. That's the trouble with narcissism. It makes you really inadequate and boring."

Have you hugged a fat girl today?

@~;~~
LillyBBBW is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 12:47 PM   #28
bigsexy920
Ok I'll be good.
 
bigsexy920's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New Jersey- Jersey Girls..... Best in the world
Posts: 3,853
bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!bigsexy920 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I really love this post. I have to agree that I hate when someone says Im too big for too small and you are totally right, when it comes from an FA its even worse. I also dislike when FA's that like only big thighs or butts Or just likes big bellies, or breasts. Its like a never ending battle. One in the world of thin and one in the world of fat, and just never seeming to be good enough. It is so frustrating.

Thank you so much for posting this. Remember Girls we are ALL BEAUTIFUL
bigsexy920 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 01:49 PM   #29
Jack Skellington
Grim Grinning Ghosts
 
Jack Skellington's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,607
Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!Jack Skellington keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jes
I still think this is relative. I'm sure others would agree. I'm toot tired and disconcerted to argue, though.
I agree that it's all relative. Just because I said I can understand why there are men and women that do not consider average sized women to be bbws doesn't necessarlily mean I agree or disagree with that view point.

To me, it's just another label. If an average sized women wants to consider herself a bbw, plus sized, fat, whatever, that's her business.

I do feel for the plight of average sized women in society. But I feel they do not in all honestly have to endure the same degree of societal stigma, do to their size, as their larger counterparts have to.
__________________
Serpents and spiders, tail of a rat, call in the spirits wherever they’re at. Rap on a table, it’s time to respond, send us a message from somewhere beyond.

Goblins and ghoulies, from last Halloween, awaken the spirits with your tambourine. Creepies and crawlies, toads in a pond, let there be music from regions beyond.

Wizards and Witches, wherever you dwell, give us a hint by ringing a bell.
Jack Skellington is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 01:53 PM   #30
fatlane
Starting Arvist
 
fatlane's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Fatlaneonline Punto Com
Posts: 7,689
fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fatlane has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

From my site:

Quote:
Welcome to Fat Lane Online. We believe beauty starts at size 8. It's insane something as small as a size 8 is considered fat, but there you are. In truth, we really prefer the Reubenesque look. That's way beyond 8, if anyone's counting. Why? Women of that size look like women, not small boys. We do not consider borderline pedophiliac gender-confused icons to be a proper standard of beauty. We love women, and we prefer they look like such. When we hear songs like Fat Bottomed Girls or Whole Lotta Rosie, we smile a certain special smile on the inside and think, "Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about!"

It's all about appreciating true feminine beauty. Today's unbelievable standards define anyone identifiable as a woman as fat, so, therefore, we like fat women, even though society defines fat to begin where "normal" should be. Or whatever. If it looks like a preteen boy, we're not interested. If she looks like a woman, well, yeah! Let's celebrate some beauty!
OK, so I prefer bigger than 8, but I find the feminine form in any size to be beautiful. I just did a picture of Angela, in fact, and she's definitely a woman who has a beautiful appearance. She's quite obviously a woman. I will proudly display that image on my site.

But that's only physical appearance. Part of beauty can be explored in communication, and another part revealed in art itself. We only touch the surface when we, well, touch the surface. There are people who, when they smile and speak their minds, reveal what the world would keep concealed by its disappointing standards.

If you look like a woman in America, you're fat, period.
__________________
Anyone can be beautiful. How about you?.

Just remember that acceptance is 71.4% of size acceptance.
fatlane is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:07 PM   #31
Jane
Photo (c) Fatlane
 
Jane's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Tangled up in Blue
Posts: 4,674
Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by TraciJo67
I'm not thin, and I'm not pretty, and I never will be.
I don't know who you've been talking to, but put them on the line with me and let me set them straight. You are as cute as a button. You make me think of Rick's mother who is a Mary Tyler Moore look alike. When I look at your picture, I see a spark in you that warms my heart. (Yes, it may be transference, but deal with it.)

TraciJo, you are a doll, and if anyone, including your lying mirror, tells you any differently, you borrow my 2x4 and we'll set them straight.

So many of the women here have such fascinating beauty. Tarella, Tina, Vickie (who looks like my idea of Galadriel), BB, Jes, and I could go on and on.

The guys here are amazing as well (for the most part), and I'm proud to be among you.
__________________
"A nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves." ~ Edward R. Murrow
Jane is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:12 PM   #32
Jes
is oddly aroused
 
Jes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 12,553
Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigsexy920
I really love this post. I have to agree that I hate when someone says Im too big for too small and you are totally right, when it comes from an FA its even worse. I also dislike when FA's that like only big thighs or butts Or just likes big bellies, or breasts. Its like a never ending battle. One in the world of thin and one in the world of fat, and just never seeming to be good enough. It is so frustrating.

Thank you so much for posting this. Remember Girls we are ALL BEAUTIFUL
heh. yeah, i think i posted about this a few weeks ago. I suppose it makes some amount of predictable sense, though. We're in a place because we look a certain way (though certainly we share some under-the-skin characteristics with one another, as well) so of course we're going to be judged, or at least viewed, by our looks even here.
Jes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:22 PM   #33
Jes
is oddly aroused
 
Jes's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 12,553
Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.Jes has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack Skellington
I agree that it's all relative. Just because I said I can understand why there are men and women that do not consider average sized women to be bbws doesn't necessarlily mean I agree or disagree with that view point.

.
Jack, if you don't stop being so totally unreasonable, I'm going to complain about you to a moderator. Now start agreeing with my un-thought-out rantings IMMEDIATELY.
Jes is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:26 PM   #34
Angel
no apologies for being me
 
Angel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Somewhere in my wandering mind
Posts: 1,779
Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!Angel keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jack Skellington
I can understand why there are people, both men and women, that would not consider a size 12/14/16 a bbw. For starters, like has been already stated, that's what is consider the average normal size for women in the US.

An average sized women is not going to get the kinds of size related harassment her larger counterparts will. An average sized women is not going to face discrimination at the workplace because of her size. She doesn't have to worry about potentially humiliating situations like fitting into airline seats, theater seats, restaurant seats, etc.

Average sized women will not get a second glance from the vast majority of people as she goes about her daily business. While her larger counterparts are often the subject of rude comments and scorn.

No one will question a guy dating a size 12 and is not going to have to deal with the negative comments a guy dating a size 28 would. If you date an average size women there is nothing wrong with you. You date a size 28 or above and there will be both men and women that will think you are a pervert.
Jack,

THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! On behalf of all the Super-Super-Sized women, THANK YOU!


That's all I have to say for now.
Angel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:36 PM   #35
FitChick
On Timeout
 
FitChick's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: USA
Posts: 829
FitChick can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesFitChick can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default

Wow, this really sums up how I feel these days (from Traci Jo):

I am no longer a fat woman, but I have lived that experience, and it will forever be a part of me. In many ways, I feel more at home here than I have ever felt in the mainstream. And I've met many wonderful people who have accepted me unconditionally, just as I am.>>>

That is REALLY HOW I FEEL ALSO. And its one reason why I was so distressed when I lost the weight. Because FINALLY, I'd found a place where I belonged....only to seemingly have that "reason" for belonging ripped away from me without my intent. Its good to know that regardless of size, I can be accepted here. I'd just assumed I wouldn't be anymore, and some comments I've heard (not always directed at me but at other smaller women) made me assume such.

As to other posts....Fatlane said his site is for women size 8 and up. I once met a personal trainer who I think was trying to show she understood how I felt as a then-fat woman working out...she told me she is a size 8 and because of that, she understands the issues fat women face And yeah, I remember thinking, "Size EIGHT?!" (akin to a supersized woman hearing size 14 and thinking WHAAAA!?)


PS to Traci Jo: you know, its weird to read you saying you think you are not attractive, because when I first saw your pic (I think it was at Abundance), I thought you were very cute! Maybe YOU don't like your looks, but others do. In fact I just clicked on your pic to get a better view, and except for the blond hair, damn you look like my mother in law (who was one hot broad lemmetellya!)
FitChick is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 02:51 PM   #36
TraciJo67
On Timeout
 
TraciJo67's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Minnesoooota
Posts: 4,880
TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.TraciJo67 has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Jane, Lilly, Vickie, Angela, Anita -

Thank you so much for your kind words

I feel that I should explain - I'm satisfied with how I look. I do the very best I can, with what I have been given. I feel quite attractive. Not conventionally pretty, but ... well, like I take care of myself. And I do. And I'm OK with who I am, and with all of my unique attributes (and I've made peace with my many flaws). I wrote what I did because I was trying to convey that of all the many things in this world that could -- arguably *should*, even -- be getting my attention, worrying about how I look to other people shouldn't even grace the bottom of the Top 100 list. I spent a lot of years focusing on what was wrong with me. I don't want to spend even one more minute caught in that negative cycle.

Beauty is so subjective. I know that my husband thinks that I'm gorgeous (he would prefer it if I regained some weight - though he does understand and support my desire for that not to happen). Everyone is beautiful, to that someone who loves him/her.

Back to the topic at hand .... I've been fascinated by all of the different perspectives. It's amazing that even here, we can't come to an agreement on what 'average' is. I agree with Fatlane, actually: In America, unless your bones show plainly through your skin (and even then, sometimes) -- to SOMEONE, you are fat.
TraciJo67 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 03:11 PM   #37
Webmaster
Chief Emeritus
 
Webmaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Knoxville, TN area
Posts: 2
Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.Webmaster has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SilkyAngela
The words of the title were posted in the pic post thread where I had posted my pictures by one of the members of a BBW/size positive forum (not this one). ...
Thank you for posting this, Angela. Unfortunately, I've heard it many times before. This was/is an issue at every NAAFA conference, and it's been an issue in other places. And the perpetrators were/are not only men. There have been numerous complaints that smaller/midsize women have been shunned or told they don't belong by larger women. It baffles me that some people can be so callous and insensitive.

I can assure you that none of this nonsense is tolerated here at Dimensions. Size acceptance does not have boundaries, barriers, or limits.
Webmaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 03:18 PM   #38
JMNYC
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 645
JMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging inJMNYC makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

We saw Goldie Hawn and Kirk Douglas casually walking down the street holding hands and window shopping in Kowloon. Nobody payed them any attention, something they would never be able to do on Main Street here in the states. It was cool!


If you have a photo of this, I can get you $5000 from a tabloid.

Unless you meant Kurt Russell, Goldie Hawn's long-time boyfriend!
JMNYC is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-17-2006, 04:13 PM   #39
LillyBBBW
Wig Snatcher
 
LillyBBBW's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 9,794
LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JMNYC
We saw Goldie Hawn and Kirk Douglas casually walking down the street holding hands and window shopping in Kowloon. Nobody payed them any attention, something they would never be able to do on Main Street here in the states. It was cool!


If you have a photo of this, I can get you $5000 from a tabloid.

Unless you meant Kurt Russell, Goldie Hawn's long-time boyfriend!
D'oh! Something told me that I should have looked it up before I posted but then I waved it off. Yes, it was Kurt Russell.
__________________
Expecting the world to treat you kindly because you are a good person is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

"...If the only pain you recognize as valid is your own, of course you'll have trouble identifying it when you see it in other people. That's the trouble with narcissism. It makes you really inadequate and boring."

Have you hugged a fat girl today?

@~;~~
LillyBBBW is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 02:51 AM   #40
Santaclear
User
 
Santaclear's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: North America
Posts: 8,230
Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SilkyAngela
.....Plumpers are fat people too!
Excellent post, Angela!
It sucks that his comments made you feel that way but it shows that good stuff (like your post and all your thoughts on this issue) can even come from the actions of an idiot like him.
__________________
:confused:
Santaclear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 03:03 AM   #41
Santaclear
User
 
Santaclear's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: North America
Posts: 8,230
Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.Santaclear has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bigsexy920
I really love this post. I have to agree that I hate when someone says Im too big for too small and you are totally right, when it comes from an FA its even worse. I also dislike when FA's that like only big thighs or butts Or just likes big bellies, or breasts. Its like a never ending battle. One in the world of thin and one in the world of fat, and just never seeming to be good enough. It is so frustrating.
Thank you so much for posting this. Remember Girls we are ALL BEAUTIFUL
I so agree with this, bigsexy. FA's who voice preferences like that embarrass me.
__________________
:confused:
Santaclear is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 06:29 AM   #42
Emma
On Timeout
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,865
Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Ok, this is in NO way getting at anyone here before anyone jumps on me;

On a lot of websites I've been on there's women calling themselves BBW at very small sizes (uk 12-14) and to me that kind of takes the word away from me. I have joined groups, encountered men that I took the time to respond to because I assumed they like BBW because they're in the group. But noooo because of these slightly overweight women being in the group and taking the word away from us they've taken the meaning to be slightly curvy(which is what they like). On lycos I've joined BBW groups and gone to mens profiles to find in the top 5 things that turn them off to be fat and obesity. If it wasn't for these small women claiming to be bbw then I wouldn't have to deal with this problem, because no one would be confused about what it means.

/rant
Emma is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 07:28 AM   #43
Donna
wait...what?
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 1,787
Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.Donna has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Question

What I am about to say in no way excuses the rude behavior some of the smaller bbw's face from mid-size and ssbbw's, however I have a theory as to why it happens in a community that is supposed to be about acceptance. Bare with me, as I am not always as eloquent as I need to be. Do y'all perhaps think that some of the negative comments made by mid & super size bbw's towards the smaller gals is transference or even jealousy? Let's face it, not everyone is confident in who they are, and self hatred runs rampant. Some may be jealous because they wish they were smaller. Some may be bitter because they have been ridiculed themselves. I have noted that a great deal of the criticism and rudeness I have encountered as a super size woman has not come from men on the streets, it's from my smaller counterparts. It has been said that at events some of the larger women make snide comments about the smaller bbw's, however I have attended a few local events in which I have overheard smaller gals making very nasty comments about the larger gals. I have been on the receiving end of some of those comments in our own chatroom, from women who are on the smaller end of the bbw range. So I guess it goes both ways....

This doesn't justify rudeness in any way, at least I don't believe it does. That's my two cents for the pot.

~D~
Donna is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 07:56 AM   #44
Jane
Photo (c) Fatlane
 
Jane's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Tangled up in Blue
Posts: 4,674
Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!Jane keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Santaclear
I so agree with this, bigsexy. FA's who voice preferences like that embarrass me.
That's just shopping the meat market, with no thought there is a person with a soul attached.
__________________
"A nation of sheep will beget a government of wolves." ~ Edward R. Murrow
Jane is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 08:22 AM   #45
LillyBBBW
Wig Snatcher
 
LillyBBBW's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 9,794
LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.LillyBBBW has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CurvyEm
Ok, this is in NO way getting at anyone here before anyone jumps on me;

On a lot of websites I've been on there's women calling themselves BBW at very small sizes (uk 12-14) and to me that kind of takes the word away from me. I have joined groups, encountered men that I took the time to respond to because I assumed they like BBW because they're in the group. But noooo because of these slightly overweight women being in the group and taking the word away from us they've taken the meaning to be slightly curvy(which is what they like). On lycos I've joined BBW groups and gone to mens profiles to find in the top 5 things that turn them off to be fat and obesity. If it wasn't for these small women claiming to be bbw then I wouldn't have to deal with this problem, because no one would be confused about what it means.

/rant
Somewhere out there there has to be a handful of guys who go to that site thinking, "BBW's!! Now THAT'S what I'm talking about!" and they are just the kind who would look at the chicks in there and say, "Hey, where are all the BBW's? YOU'RE not a BBW, Puh-leez!" I suppose it's all a matter of being polite about searching for what you're looking for rather than being rude.

If I were you Em I'd put my mug shot up anyway. You never know, there might be a bunch of people lurking in there just waiting for someone like you to show up eventually.

A few years ago I used to belong to this Yahoo group where all the girls in there were merely chubby at best. They would lament at how much they hated their life and how the world treats them like lepers and then put up the most amazing photos of themselves. Every single one of them was hotter than the next, it was obscene. They made me feel like a bloated yak, I weight as much as two of them put together. I finally put my photo up and got 'ok' responses. Soon after that all these other super chicks started putting their pictures up. It wasn't competative or anything which was good. I guess there were a lot of other super chicks in there who felt the same as I did and I'm such an attention whore that I couldn't resist the opportunity to put my pictures up to see what would happen.
__________________
Expecting the world to treat you kindly because you are a good person is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.

"...If the only pain you recognize as valid is your own, of course you'll have trouble identifying it when you see it in other people. That's the trouble with narcissism. It makes you really inadequate and boring."

Have you hugged a fat girl today?

@~;~~
LillyBBBW is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 08:46 AM   #46
gangstadawg
the wanderer
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 3,289
gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!gangstadawg has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Santaclear
I so agree with this, bigsexy. FA's who voice preferences like that embarrass me.
in a way it embaresses me as well but we like what we like.
gangstadawg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-18-2006, 10:10 AM   #47
SilkyAngela
runs with scissors
 
SilkyAngela's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 469
SilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticedSilkyAngela never has a post go unnoticed
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Santaclear
I so agree with this, bigsexy. FA's who voice preferences like that embarrass me.
I still think a preference can be voiced in a positive way by complimenting those who do have the features someone likes rather than posting something negative to those who do not have those features. It just seems nasty to interrupt someone to say, "You aint my thing." when he could have said to someone else who is more to his liking, "Hey baby, you got it goin on!" and made the same point.
I am all for men and women alike having their own preferences in what they find attractive. For example, I have an extreme love of bald men who are big and meaty with hairy chests and tummies. Why? Hell, I don't know. I just do and that's all there is to it. But I certainly wouldn't stop someone on the street or in a forum (size positive or otherwise) who had hair on his head, thin or atheletic build with no body hair to say...."omfg you are not a sexy man!" Why tear him down? Why give someone else who looks like him the impression that he is not acceptable? I have too much good to do in the world and only one life to do it all to waste my time or energy hurting someone.

disclaimer: I am not at all saying that men who are not my preference aren't sexy. Call me a freak if you will, but I can usually find something sexy about men and women of all body types, sizes, with or without hair, race, religion, socio-economic background or status. But then again, I am one of those weirdos who goes around looking for the good things in people.
__________________
"For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.” -Ivan Panin

:smitten: Because every body matters. SizePositiveTV
I get bloggy wit it. :D The Sweet Spot
SilkyAngela is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:31 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright Dimensions Magazine. All rights reserved worldwide.