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Old 06-26-2013, 11:20 AM   #176
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Angry

Alright, here's my quandary to rant over today...

While I like counterfactual thinking for fun, it's not something I typically worry about. If it's nothing I ever would have thought about before, I don't get frivolous about it. But when I had thought of it?

For some reason, if something had even crossed my mind before whatever incident occurred, I can't help agonizing over the fact that I probably could have prevented it. Mostly it happens if something breaks. I'll realize it's in a compromised location, but will be in a hurry or something and tell myself it's unlikely that something will happen. Then when it actually gets broken by someone, I'm not even mad that it broke. I'm upset that I could have prevented it happening, seemingly. Is it my fault for not being extra safe, or someone else's for not bothering to be cautious?

Well, now our cat is seemingly quite sick. He has feline leukemia, so his immune system isn't so good. He's been getting sniffly lately, and now I have to wonder if it's because of the fact that we've been taking care of my late uncle's cats. They haven't really had vet visits in a long while, and it seems pretty possible that we could have brought something home just being being in contact with them. So now I'm stuck wondering if we could have prevented Kitter from getting sick by switching clothes/shoes, etc. One of the cats at my uncle's house already died due to something similar. I kept saying he should go to the vet...but other people weren't so urgent about the matter, and when my mom finally DID go to take him to the vet, she found him not quite alive enough to do so (insert heartbreak.)

And as my secondary rant, why are some people okay with being so goddamn irresponsible? I realize plenty of people have a lot of their plate. But when they don't? It's one of those things I just have no desire to tolerate anymore. Why should someone have to compensate for someone else's total incompetence just to make sure things don't go to shit?

Alrighty, that's enough ranting/patronizing my thread for now. And here's my set of open ended questions that anyone might feel like entertaining!
  • Does anyone else get really hung up over the counterfactual prevention thing?
  • Is there some way to eliminate the compulsion to agonize over it, besides constantly telling yourself that what's done is done?
  • If you had to get your native language magically switched - with no ability to learn any other language - which would you choose, and where would you move (if you do decide to move?)
  • If you had to be some other sort of creature - be it an animal or inanimate object - but retain your sentience, what would you choose?!
  • Why are bullet points used so infrequently on here? This seems great.
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Old 06-26-2013, 12:36 PM   #177
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And as my secondary rant, why are some people okay with being so goddamn irresponsible? I realize plenty of people have a lot of their plate. But when they don't? It's one of those things I just have no desire to tolerate anymore. Why should someone have to compensate for someone else's total incompetence just to make sure things don't go to shit?
There could be all sorts of reasons (such as just not caring), but I think one that gets brought up too infrequently is fear. On the one hand, fear of being proven inadequate. If you take responsibility and things go to crap, then you failed. If you don't take responsibility and things go to crap, then you are just an irresponsible jerk--but that is a choice, and doesn't speak to your competence. On the other hand, the fear of being proven adequate. If you take responsibility and things work out, then you can make a difference, and the next thing that comes along you may feel more obligated to take responsibility for it, and the one after that, potentially cascading responsibilities that you don't want.

Or my views on the above could simply be coloured by being parent of a teenager.....

On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?

ETA: In quick posts, the button for bullets isn't available!
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Old 06-26-2013, 02:46 PM   #178
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There could be all sorts of reasons (such as just not caring), but I think one that gets brought up too infrequently is fear. On the one hand, fear of being proven inadequate. If you take responsibility and things go to crap, then you failed. If you don't take responsibility and things go to crap, then you are just an irresponsible jerk--but that is a choice, and doesn't speak to your competence. On the other hand, the fear of being proven adequate. If you take responsibility and things work out, then you can make a difference, and the next thing that comes along you may feel more obligated to take responsibility for it, and the one after that, potentially cascading responsibilities that you don't want.

Or my views on the above could simply be coloured by being parent of a teenager.....

On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?

ETA: In quick posts, the button for bullets isn't available!
Those are really good points - I can definitely see fear being the explanation for a few people I had in mind while writing that. It also reminds me of the most lovely quote that ODFFA linked for me in her crush post (which I shall iterate my appreciation for here! )

It actually reminds me of something I encountered over and over again in moral psychology: The Doctrine of Doing and Allowing, as they call it. The typical example is a trolley case. Say you see an out of control trolley heading for 5 people stuck to the tracks. You have the ability to pull a lever and re-route the trolley to only hit one person. The DDA is a popular reason to NOT pull the lever - as then you're merely letting the 5 die instead of killing the one. Once you involve yourself, the responsibility of that one person's death is supposedly on you? I prefer the utilitarian judgement there myself.

As for the job thing...I can only offer the - probably uncommon - perspective of someone who's been discouraged from getting summer/part-time jobs. For me personally, I think not having had any has worked rather swimmingly in terms of development. In the summers, not having something to work on ended up giving me a lot more drive to either seek things out, or give my all when I DO have things to do. I feel as if I've had more time to seek out fulfilling personal projects, and I guess it leaves me energized enough to really load things on academically. But I'm rather pre-disposed to want to get into intellectual things in the first place, so there's my biggest bias. I feel it's also made me treasure the money I do get - I'm typically very frugal.

My biggest concern there is with my resume. I intend on applying to PhD programs, so I've been getting a lot of research experience in. But I hope my lack of job experience doesn't end up hurting me there.

I'm also realizing I've just never even used the quick reply
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Old 06-26-2013, 02:46 PM   #179
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On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?
Some of the most irresponsible teenagers I knew worked summer jobs/part time.

Then they blew all the money they made and learned nothing because it didn't affect them adversely; they were still being taken care of under their parents' roof.

IMO (as a non-parent) I think it would be more beneficial to get them volunteering. Doing work and taking on responsibilities without the expectation of reward.
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Old 06-26-2013, 03:38 PM   #180
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  • Does anyone else get really hung up over the counterfactual prevention thing?
  • Is there some way to eliminate the compulsion to agonize over it, besides constantly telling yourself that what's done is done?
I know what you mean, if something happens I had only a very vague gut feeling that something like this might occur, I can agonize over it endlessly - and sometimes it even leaves me unable to decide or act in similiar situations.

Imo it is possibly the (negative) flip side of having a good memory (... which I assume, given your line of academic work, you most likely have) - it lets you revisit situations others simply (and often luckily) forget.


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[*]If you had to get your native language magically switched - with no ability to learn any other language - which would you choose, and where would you move (if you do decide to move?) [/LIST]
That is something I cannot imagine - to have only one language at my disposal. Having started to learn my second language before I could really think, for all my literate life having two which I consider my natives, it would seem like such a deprivation to limit myself to one.
Different languages have such diverging strengths and weaknesses, offer various options of playing with words - or just a spot-on expression for a certain situation, which in it's perfection cannot be translated into another. No longer having that would be awful.

Thank you for introducing me to bullet points! Never knew this site offered the option. But all the settings remain a deep mystery to me - I'm glad I manage to post anything that is readable and doesn't immediately disappear.


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Or my views on the above could simply be coloured by being parent of a teenager.....

On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?
From personal experience I think summer or part time jobs are an important element in growing up.
A work environment is different from school, interacting with grown-up co-workers as peers (not parents or teachers), finding out how hard it really is to earn money all are important lessons learned.

I would discourage it though from the pure money-earning perspective. I had friends at school who waitressed like maniacs or worked insane shifts at the McPlace just to earn as much money as possible - for things like motor-cycle licences, designer jeans or Mallorca vacations (none out of true economic necessity). And that often did limit their academic capacity.

My parents supported me in finding jobs that either had a community component to them (baby-sitting for neighbors, cherry-picking with my class mates) or where I truly learned something on the job and acquired new skills (language tutoring, running an office, basics of insurance law, working with different computer programs all the way to paid academic research assistant at university).

Good luck with convincing son to do something meaningful!
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Old 06-26-2013, 06:37 PM   #181
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...

On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?

...
IMHO summer jobs are very important. I can't believe how many kids here in California have no desire to work. When I was a teen in the late 70s and early 80s in Alberta if you didn't have a summer job you were considered a looser. And the job had to be something other than fast food or retail.

Thanks to a good economy (at least until 1982) and the absence of pesky child labour laws I was able to drive our neighbors 300 horse power tractor when I was 14, operate heavy machinery in a log home factory when I was 15, work in the Swan Hills oil fields when I was 16, and operate a big old Caterpillar 966 loader in a gravel pit when I was 17. And this wasn't the least bit unusual -- many of my friends worked at similar jobs.

I may be a little old school but I think that everyone should do hard dirty work for a while. Unfortunately the attitude of many kids, at least in California, is hell no "we've got Mexicans for that."
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Old 06-27-2013, 08:50 AM   #182
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  • If you had to get your native language magically switched - with no ability to learn any other language - which would you choose, and where would you move (if you do decide to move?)
I'm 100% with Agouderia on this. I can hardly imagine being deprived of the delight in learning even just a little about the nature of language by virtue of knowing more than one.

But let's say I had absolutely no choice in the matter..... Portuguese. Why? Because I absolutely *love the sound of it (which I guess would then be diminished by the fact that it would just be my plain ol' native language. Hmph! Can't win.) And I suppose it'd be best if I lived in a Portuguese speaking country then, wouldn't it? I'll go with Portugal then, because it's in Europe and I prefer their dialect over Brazilian Portuguese.

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On a different topic, how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?
I don't have much of an authoritative leg to stand on here since we don't have anything like 'summer jobs' as a norm in SA, but I'll pitch in anyway

I think it's a very good thing to have as a cultural value, and I have a feeling we're not too far from taking something like that on over here. But.... as is often the case with something that has become an establishment, it's not going to work/be good for every child.

I had much the situation Amaranthine described, and I never even questioned it since I didn't know at the time having a summer job was a 'thing' for some kids in other countries. I would have really struggled if I were forced to have one.

I probably would have wanted to get a job, I should add, but I think at that stage in my life I wouldn't have dealt with it very well. School took a lot out of me in many different ways - I also naturally put a lot into it too - and I really needed to have those summer breaks to myself to get re-energised. So I'm grateful for never having to deal with that pressure. Long story short - maybe it works for most, but taking it on individual merit might be wise.

Also, Saffrican immigrants are apparently renowned in other countries for being pretty responsible and hard working (there is the odd exception, I suppose) and we didn't need summer jobs to earn ourselves that rep.
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Old 06-28-2013, 02:51 PM   #183
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  • "why are some people okay with being so goddamn irresponsible?"
Because they're stupid. Their minds just aren't sophisticated enough to efficiently manage as many competing demands as yours might, nor do they have the moral inclination to attempt to seriously exercise these capacities. No differently than how the physically weak must be protected by the strong.

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  • "Why should someone have to compensate for someone else's total incompetence just to make sure things don't go to shit?"
Honestly, you don't have to do much of anything but stay-Black & die. What you do, whatever it is, is just a natural extension of being yourself. Once you realize this, everything will seem much easier.

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Originally Posted by Amaranthine View Post
  • "I like counterfactual thinking for fun...if something had even crossed my mind before whatever incident occurred, I can't help agonizing over the fact that I probably could have prevented it. Mostly it happens if something breaks..Well, now our cat is...and now I have to wonder if it's because of the fact that we've been taking care of my late uncle's cats...Does anyone else get really hung up over the counterfactual prevention thing?"
Yeah, I admit that I'm a little bit the same way. Kind of over-analytical. Sure.

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Originally Posted by Amaranthine View Post
  • "Is there some way to eliminate the compulsion to agonize over it, besides constantly telling yourself that what's done is done?"
Well, to begin-with, you're either more sane than insane or vice-versa. The more you lean towards the functional side of things, I think, the safer it seems to believe that there's an innate rationality to whatever mental idiosyncrasies might arise. If something keeps popping back into your mind, it would seem that there's something more to digest there. Something to learn? Maybe it's best to not just dismiss that feeling. Maybe it's a reason or catalyst to...reflect more on what you really value. Or how you should best prioritize things. Whatever. Point being that there's a process at work here. So, instead of reflexively trying to short-circuit that instinct, perhaps you can figure out how to make it more powerful or efficient. Quicker at getting to what it all distills down to.

For me, writing things out is what ultimately tends to do the most to help me organize thoughts. And move more quickly towards a resolution or clarity of some sort.

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Originally Posted by Amaranthine View Post
  • "If you had to get your native language magically switched - with no ability to learn any other language - which would you choose, and where would you move (if you do decide to move?)"
Sort of unclear, because you're not saying whether or not we'd retain any secondary language skills. Maybe this helps: If I could only speak & understand one language fluently (or as well as I use English right now,) and it had to be something other than English, I would probably choose French. And France, of course, would then be the ideal place to live. Second choice would be....Spanish. And in that case I'd probably do some moving around.

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  • "If you had to be some other sort of creature - be it an animal or inanimate object - but retain your sentience, what would you choose?!"
Part Klingon, Part Trill?

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  • "Why are bullet points used so infrequently on here? This seems great."
Oh, I agree. As you can see, they help me to keep things more concise.

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"how important do you think summer or part time jobs are for kids? If you think they are important, at what age do you think they should really start taking them on? Does it matter what it is, or simply that they take on that responsibility of showing up and doing what is required?"
I think it's important for kids of every age to have access to & engage-with a diverse variety of different types of learning experiences, especially in terms of how they're structured. Or how much so. That challenge them-personally, but in ways that are ultimately constructive, & build confidence.

So, a traditional part-time or summer job would seem like a very practical approach for most as soon as they reach legal working age. But there are other types of opportunities out there, that are just as enriching, albeit in somewhat different ways. Really, the important thing, I think, is to try to get them to begin to try to think in terms of their own personal development and investing their own personal time into it, as something that they will have to pay-forward in order to learn and/or in order to earn the opportunity to get to do whatever it is they ultimately want to.

Even more so if money is no object or only of secondary concern. But, then again, just having to earn some money to get the things you need to then pursue your own personal ambitions is also a kind of learning-experience as well. Further emphasized when you're doing the menial types of jobs or heavy physical labor that often seem so far removed from whatever ends towards which it's all directed.



Now, with all-that out of the way:

It looks like there are quite a few Damien Jurado fans out there. So, maybe this is as good a place as any to ask if anyone has been to what's called a "Living Room Show?"

I ask because there is a certain artist (that I want to see perform live) who is doing a bunch of these in the coming months. When I clicked on the link to purchase tickets, there was this pdf that you can open which basically explains that youíre supposed to give them your email address and that they, in turn, will email you with the precise address & parking info, etcÖ And that youíre not supposed to reveal any of this to anyone who hasnít also purchased a ticket?! Anyway, I mention Jurado specifically because the management company through which all of these shows are ďorganizedĒ for the artist I want to see does the same for him. Or, at least, (I think) he seems like the most widely recognizable artist on there.

Iím really not sure of what to expect. I donít even know if this article is really talking about the same thing. Main issues: Seating Is this, like, supposed to be general admission? Do folks just sit wherever they want? Is it actually in some personís own personal living room? What about drinks & snacks? Can I bring my own? What about beer? Or using the restroom?
Will there be, like, mainly all people who know each other? I mean, is it a kind of ďa scene?Ē With a bunch of local hipsters & scene-kids running things like itís some sort of "open-mike?"

I guess I will be alright as long as I donít have to sit on the floor or any kind of chair thatís too small or fragile. Insights? Anyone?
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Old 06-28-2013, 05:17 PM   #184
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For me, writing things out is what ultimately tends to do the most to help me organize thoughts. And move more quickly towards a resolution or clarity of some sort.




Now, with all-that out of the way:

It looks like there are quite a few Damien Jurado fans out there. So, maybe this is as good a place as any to ask if anyone has been to what's called a "Living Room Show?"

I ask because there is a certain artist (that I want to see perform live) who is doing a bunch of these in the coming months. When I clicked on the link to purchase tickets, there was this pdf that you can open which basically explains that youíre supposed to give them your email address and that they, in turn, will email you with the precise address & parking info, etcÖ And that youíre not supposed to reveal any of this to anyone who hasnít also purchased a ticket?! Anyway, I mention Jurado specifically because the management company through which all of these shows are ďorganizedĒ for the artist I want to see does the same for him. Or, at least, (I think) he seems like the most widely recognizable artist on there.

Iím really not sure of what to expect. I donít even know if this article is really talking about the same thing. Main issues: Seating Is this, like, supposed to be general admission? Do folks just sit wherever they want? Is it actually in some personís own personal living room? What about drinks & snacks? Can I bring my own? What about beer? Or using the restroom?
Will there be, like, mainly all people who know each other? I mean, is it a kind of ďa scene?Ē With a bunch of local hipsters & scene-kids running things like itís some sort of "open-mike?"

I guess I will be alright as long as I donít have to sit on the floor or any kind of chair thatís too small or fragile. Insights? Anyone?
First off, I appreciate all the input I largely agree with everything. And the writing out bit as well. That was my main reason for subjecting everyone to that entire thing.

As for your own question...

I've never actually been to a house/living room/basement show where tickets were sold. And all the shows I've been have been of the punk/metal/even some indie variety. Definitely an underground music scene kinda thing, where it's only advertised on FB/forums. So I'm going to assume what you're thinking of is way more tame/structured.

Even still...it's most probably quite literally someone's home. I'd be *very* surprised if seating was available. If the crowd is small enough, I'm sure people could just settle in on the floor. It's possible a couch might be available, but I've typically seen standing-only deals.

I'd also be surprised if food were available. The thing about house shows seems to be that they don't have the regulations that a more proper venue does - which enables BYOB...well, bring your own anything, really. But again, considering this is a more official sounding thing, I'd be surprised if smoking indoors were allowed. A restroom has always been available at shows I've been too. And yeah, most shows I've gone to are populated with a very niche group made up of many people who know each other.

Again...I really don't know what something like that would be compared to an underground scene show, but that's the general insight I can provide.
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Old 06-29-2013, 09:22 AM   #185
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Stupid worry here. I don't like messaging people on dating sites cause I'm afraid I will come off as some sort of creeper. A lot of my friends on tumblr post the gross messages they get in their inboxes (and they are goddamn creepy) and I know I'm not that bad. But I still worry I could come off as a creep for whatever reason.
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Old 06-29-2013, 11:02 AM   #186
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Stupid worry here. I don't like messaging people on dating sites cause I'm afraid I will come off as some sort of creeper. A lot of my friends on tumblr post the gross messages they get in their inboxes (and they are goddamn creepy) and I know I'm not that bad. But I still worry I could come off as a creep for whatever reason.
Even if the message is unintentionally creepy/awkward, if you have a decent profile that can be summed up into more than "I want to whet my dick", chances are most women will reply to someone who comes off as a well rounded individual.

My favourite message of all time was "I really like that red lipstick you wear in all your pictures. It would leave a truly remarkable stain on my cock."

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Old 06-29-2013, 11:15 AM   #187
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My favourite message of all time was "I really like that red lipstick you wear in all your pictures. It would leave a truly remarkable stain on my cock."
My mom told me this is how I am supposed to start 90% of my conversations. Are you saying my mom is wrong?
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Old 06-29-2013, 11:22 AM   #188
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My favourite message of all time was "I really like that red lipstick you wear in all your pictures. It would leave a truly remarkable stain on my cock."
oh no

oh noooo
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Old 06-29-2013, 11:31 AM   #189
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My favourite message of all time was "I really like that red lipstick you wear in all your pictures. It would leave a truly remarkable stain on my cock."
Did you write back and give him the brand name and order number of the lipstick so he could take care of fabricating that remarkable stain ???
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Old 06-29-2013, 11:41 AM   #190
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Even if the message is unintentionally creepy/awkward, if you have a decent profile that can be summed up into more than "I want to whet my dick", chances are most women will reply to someone who comes off as a well rounded individual.
I'm not sure about that. There's been some (questionable) studies that indicated women become hyper selective on dating sites. One of the larger sites, OK Cupid I believe, said something to the effect that women, regardless of their own perceived level of attractiveness, regarded 80% of the men on the site as not attractive enough to respond to. Statistics showed something like 90% of the women were vying for the top 20% in the pool of guys. Meanwhile, guys had a much wider spread of who they were pursuing.

There was another British experiment I remember that had women look at dating profiles of men and then later mingle with them in a bar-like scenario. The women quickly shot down the majority of the guys' profiles, yet showed interest when they met face to face.

Granted, "studies" and "experiments" like this are being done and touted online all the time. How scientifically sound they are is up for debate.
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Old 06-29-2013, 12:26 PM   #191
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I'm not sure about that. There's been some (questionable) studies that indicated women become hyper selective on dating sites. One of the larger sites, OK Cupid I believe, said something to the effect that women, regardless of their own perceived level of attractiveness, regarded 80% of the men on the site as not attractive enough to respond to. Statistics showed something like 90% of the women were vying for the top 20% in the pool of guys. Meanwhile, guys had a much wider spread of who they were pursuing.

There was another British experiment I remember that had women look at dating profiles of men and then later mingle with them in a bar-like scenario. The women quickly shot down the majority of the guys' profiles, yet showed interest when they met face to face.

Granted, "studies" and "experiments" like this are being done and touted online all the time. How scientifically sound they are is up for debate.
I've had plenty of OkC experiences, and honestly...a lot of the men that seem to message me aren't bad at all from a ...traditional standpoint? Definitely not my type, but still. I doubt the studies done were really that rigorous - but those results wouldn't surprise me at the same time. I think a distinction should be drawn between the girls who NEED OkC to find someone, and those who just find it entertaining to see if anyone's worthwhile.

A bigger issue I've encountered is that men will put NO effort into messages. Most merely say "Hi how r u" or something along those lines. A well-thought out, personalized message is MUCH more likely to stand out. And their profiles are pretty terrible as well. Most of them are generic and uninteresting.

That being said...I'm not sure how other women interpret creepy, but I don't see why an intelligently written, friendly message would be taken to badly. A big mistake is not asking questions. Give the conversation somewhere to start.
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Old 07-01-2013, 06:06 PM   #192
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I've had plenty of OkC experiences, and honestly...a lot of the men that seem to message me aren't bad at all from a ...traditional standpoint? Definitely not my type, but still. I doubt the studies done were really that rigorous - but those results wouldn't surprise me at the same time. I think a distinction should be drawn between the girls who NEED OkC to find someone, and those who just find it entertaining to see if anyone's worthwhile.

A bigger issue I've encountered is that men will put NO effort into messages. Most merely say "Hi how r u" or something along those lines. A well-thought out, personalized message is MUCH more likely to stand out. And their profiles are pretty terrible as well. Most of them are generic and uninteresting.

That being said...I'm not sure how other women interpret creepy, but I don't see why an intelligently written, friendly message would be taken to badly. A big mistake is not asking questions. Give the conversation somewhere to start.
I'd say this has more to with the people than there gender. Any dating site ive gone to, a lot of the women are bland or generic. They ALL usually"I'm different, I get dirty, I off road and hunt" ummm when every profile says that, I tend to doubt it's authenticity.
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Old 07-01-2013, 06:08 PM   #193
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Even if the message is unintentionally creepy/awkward, if you have a decent profile that can be summed up into more than "I want to whet my dick", chances are most women will reply to someone who comes off as a well rounded individual.

My favourite message of all time was "I really like that red lipstick you wear in all your pictures. It would leave a truly remarkable stain on my cock."
Jeez! How many times do I have to apologize?
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Old 07-01-2013, 06:37 PM   #194
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I'd say this has more to with the people than there gender. Any dating site ive gone to, a lot of the women are bland or generic.
I do notice that a lot of women seem to not feel the need to open up and really put themselves out there. I look at personality and interests first, and I kind of frown when I see "down to earth, easy going and fun" and only a few 'safe' interests like movies and dining out.

Wow, how very descriptive, unique and interesting. /deadpan

It's worse when you look at her pictures and she's doing something like a cosplay or holding a musical instrument, I'm like: "Why didn't she put that down? Now she's 10 times more interesting!"



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They ALL usually"I'm different, I get dirty, I off road and hunt" ummm when every profile says that, I tend to doubt it's authenticity.
Maybe they think every guy is into those things? What it tells me is that's the kind of guy she's looking to appeal to so I can feel free to pass.
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Old 07-02-2013, 03:07 AM   #195
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Sorry to bore all of you good people.... I need a little rant

I consider myself to be a reasonably bright and intelligent person, I can read a document or set of instructions and usually fully understand what is going on, I can usually translate bureaucratic jargon in to plain and simple English, however I feel I have been finally defeated. It seems the process of formally handing in and graduating is significantly harder than the PhD itself. Maybe it is a final test? Maybe it is all a big joke? Maybe it is all a dream?

When I finished the writing stage and passed my thesis defence I thought my troubles were over... little did I know they had only just begun. I had 6 weeks to undertake minor corrections to my thesis, these were then to be handed back in so an examiner could check they had been done. No problem I thought, the University had other ideas. I emailed a PDF of my thesis to the examiner two weeks before the 6 week deadline, this was a favour to him as he wanted it a bit early and does not like dealing with hard copies. However to fulfil university regulations a hard copy was submitted to the library. At this point everything went weird. Despite the thesis being submitted two weeks early they claimed it was late and not allow me to submit it, after a few angry phone calls they allowed me to submit it. However I kept on getting follow up calls and email saying my thesis had not been submitted and I would have to formally re submit my thesis and hold another thesis defence. No amount of reasoning and production of submission receipts would quell the tide of bullshit coming from the registry. Finally they accepted it had been submitted....on the day of the submission deadline.

All pieces of academic work in the UK now have to undergo software plagiarism checks, when I submitted my thesis this was done and I had less than 2% plagiarism, the small amount it had pick up was from my own paper, all well and good. The Library submitted my thesis to more plagiarism checks, this time the result was >95% plagiarism !!!!!!!!! Guess what it had picked up my own thesis from the first time it had been checked. Any reasonable person who have actually looked at the source and date of the plagiarism to try and understand what had happen, I was not dealing with reasonable people. They launched a formal plagiarism investigation to which I was advised to seek legal counsel. What complicated matters further was that the plagiarism officer for our college was my supervisor, which then led him to be under investigation. It took a letter from a lawyer to actually get them to look at the reasoning behind the plagiarism.

Good news... my examiner signed off my corrections, full steam ahead to graduation... errr no. My thesis has to be formally bound by the university. I take the two required copies to them ,all is good. A PDF is submitted to the library for their e-thesis repository, all is good.... No apparently the PDF version of my thesis has more page than the hard copy. WTF??? I am then being told I cannot graduate. At this point I am getting fairly angry with all the messing about. I storm in to the library with a hard copy of my thesis, demand to see the person in charge of dealing with all of this. It turns out they have just looked at the total amount of pages in the PDF and compared that to the total number of numbered pages in my thesis. Several pages in the front of the thesis are not formally numbered, as they are pages such as title pages, table of content ect....

I am due to graduate on Thursday, what else can go wrong?
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Old 07-02-2013, 08:11 AM   #196
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Ouch, Shandy! Do please post a pic of you with diploma in hand!

Assuming, of course, that they don't demand a last minute DNA test and decide that you are actually a clone of yourself....
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Old 07-05-2013, 03:12 AM   #197
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@Hozay: Are you avoiding my Damien Jurado question because you're guarding the scene from the likes of me? Or is it more that I'm the one you're protecting?

@Everyone else: What....in your opinion or sense of it....is television's most realistic depiction of life in whatever country you're from or at least whatever part of it you live-in?

For Americans, I think Roseanne kind of stood-out, for sometime, as just an intentionally very honest depiction of a very real-seeming American family. But, you know, then it completely jumped the shark. I mean, it' not quite familiar for someone like me, but I can certainly see the realism in it.

As I can with another show, a favorite of a buddy of mind who grew up around the El Paso area, King of the Hill. He would always go on about how it reminded him so much of his home there.

Freaks & Geeks also vaguely reminds me of some of my friends & their families from growing up. But it's sort of dated, & a bit before my time.

From time to time, I will look at some....British television. And wonder if any of it seems realistic-enough for any of our UK-based Dimmers. Shows like East-Enders or BallyKissAngel...Is that weird? To imagine some of you talking & acting like that? What about Aussies, do they have shows like these, from an Aussie point of view? If you can't come up with a TV-show, then-maybe suggest a movie. I dunno. I'm curious to know what any of you might think.
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Old 07-05-2013, 04:52 AM   #198
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What....in your opinion or sense of it....is television's most realistic depiction of life in whatever country you're from or at least whatever part of it you live-in?
Trailer Park Boys is uncomfortably close to reality. Strip out the wacky and unrealistic plots and it's pretty much life in the poorer areas of Dartmouth, only slightly exaggerated. Even gags that viewers would assume are completely made up, like 'bottle kids', are not.
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Old 07-05-2013, 05:54 AM   #199
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Italian television series are often far from reality. Too shiny, too politically correct...

But there are a few exceptions.

"Boris", for example, it's a sitcom showing the life on an fictional italian soap opera set, though the eyes of a newly arrived director apprentice. Sarcastic, funny, politically incorrect...and according to the ones who really work in that world...is really realistic!

Another good example is "Romanzo criminale" (Crime Story), set in the '80, following the rise of a criminal gang in Rome. Based on a true story...it's violent and tough...and for the ones who lived in Rome in that time period it's brutally honest
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Old 07-05-2013, 06:21 AM   #200
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Trailer Park Boys is uncomfortably close to reality. Strip out the wacky and unrealistic plots and it's pretty much life in the poorer areas of Dartmouth, only slightly exaggerated. Even gags that viewers would assume are completely made up, like 'bottle kids', are not.
My friend and I just finished watching the series (well, as many of the episodes as we could find, which was up to around season 7), and if trailer parks in Canada are actually similar to Sunnyvale in reality (minus the blatant absurdity), I don't think I'd mind living there, heh. I mean, who doesn't want a friend like bubbles?

It certainly beats the trailer parks here in the southern US. I haven't lived in one personally, but I've had close friends that did, and... suffice it to say that "Sunnyvale" seems like a relatively classy place to live, by comparison.

I wouldn't be too fond of the "bottle kids" schtick though...

Edit: As for Yakatori's question... I'd say "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo" is a fairly accurate representation of certain parts of the deep south. I wish I were joking about that.
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