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Old 12-04-2007, 07:43 PM   #101
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Originally Posted by Tooz View Post
Gee, it couldn't possibly be because of lifetimes of insults and being called blobs, among other things. No, that couldn't be it.
Well, I would respectfully ask that you understand that having never been fat, I have never been called that. Also, I've never called a person that, nor have I heard anyone called that. In hindsight (which is always 20/20), I can see how that word carries a meaning that I honestly wasn't really aware of. The blob I was thinking of was like that of the old movie, a sort of shapeless mass. I NEVER intended it as a realistic or even serious way of classifying other people's bodies. I can respect that you, and others, felt insulted by it, and for that I apologize. One of the main reasons I came to this forum was to learn about the issues facing fat people since I am attracted to fat women (The other reason was for a sense of pride and community with other FA's. As a matter of fact I had never heard that term before coming here). You will have to forgive me for not being totally abreast of everything that I could say that could offend a fat person. Its really not my intent, but it will occasionally happen in my learning process. Please don't be an enemy or an obstacle in my learning process.

In short, I would like to reiterate that I meant no harm, and only meant to express that I don't so much have a size preference or limit, as I have certain proportions or physical that I find attractive. It's really not a size thing for me at all. Any size that doesn't represent an inconvenience in the woman's life is ok with me. Had I said that from the get-go, I probably wouldn't have offended you, but I also wouldn't have learned anything.
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Old 12-04-2007, 07:52 PM   #102
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It's just something that's important to always keep in mind.
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Old 12-04-2007, 07:57 PM   #103
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It's just something that's important to always keep in mind.
Agreed, and it's one of the things I'm trying to learn the most about. Thank you for being patient with me. I will chalk up your previous insult to frustration and won't hold it against you.
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Old 12-04-2007, 08:11 PM   #104
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It's not like that at all. I'm sorry but I really don't understand why folks got so angry. Would anyone care to explain it to me in a way that isn't peppered with personal insults and belittlements.
You are asking people who have just been punched in the face...to not react...you try that and then get back to ' us ' . Not one person owes you calmness over ...that..not one. I have a sister who once said a very rude thing to me ( nothing about weight ). She was really taken aback when I dared voice my displeasure. For her, the selfish way she was/is, I had no right to treat her the way she had treated me. Right.
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Old 12-04-2007, 08:40 PM   #105
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Well, I would respectfully ask that you understand that having never been fat, I have never been called that. Also, I've never called a person that, nor have I heard anyone called that. In hindsight (which is always 20/20), I can see how that word carries a meaning that I honestly wasn't really aware of. The blob I was thinking of was like that of the old movie, a sort of shapeless mass. I NEVER intended it as a realistic or even serious way of classifying other people's bodies. I can respect that you, and others, felt insulted by it, and for that I apologize. One of the main reasons I came to this forum was to learn about the issues facing fat people since I am attracted to fat women (The other reason was for a sense of pride and community with other FA's. As a matter of fact I had never heard that term before coming here). You will have to forgive me for not being totally abreast of everything that I could say that could offend a fat person. Its really not my intent, but it will occasionally happen in my learning process. Please don't be an enemy or an obstacle in my learning process.

In short, I would like to reiterate that I meant no harm, and only meant to express that I don't so much have a size preference or limit, as I have certain proportions or physical that I find attractive. It's really not a size thing for me at all. Any size that doesn't represent an inconvenience in the woman's life is ok with me. Had I said that from the get-go, I probably wouldn't have offended you, but I also wouldn't have learned anything.
You have to tread lightly here, noob. For some, it's going to sound like you're less concerned with an inconvenience in a fat woman's life and more concerned about the inconvenience to your own. I know that's definitely not what you meant, but it could seem that way.

And your earlier post about finding defined curves more attractive than an "ellipse" is going to make some women self-conscious. Pitting one body shape against another is always going to hurt feelings. Even if both shapes are fat. "Blob", though, is probably a word that you should just completely erase from your Dimensions vocabulary. No good can ever come of it.
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Old 12-04-2007, 08:41 PM   #106
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You have to tread lightly here, noob. For some, it's going to sound like you're less concerned with an inconvenience in a fat woman's life and more concerned about the inconvenience to your own. I know that's definitely not what you meant, but it could seem that way.

And your earlier post about finding defined curves more attractive than an "ellipse" is going to make some women self-conscious. Pitting one body shape against another is always going to hurt feelings. Even if both shapes are fat. "Blob", though, is probably a word that you should just completely erase from your Dimensions vocabulary. No good can ever come of it.
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Old 12-04-2007, 09:21 PM   #107
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I'd date blobs.

Just sayin'.

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Old 12-04-2007, 09:53 PM   #108
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Women do not want to be compared to geometric figures or waveforms.

Women do not want to be referred to by words that imply amorphous, shapeless masses with no definition. I am sure it sounds neutral to you, but coming from someone carved out of marble, who has never been fat in their life, it has a completely different and derogatory connotation, esp. in a forum whose subject invites controversy.

There are numerous other adjectives: Zaftig, rubenesque, voluptuous or bathycolpian (for the busty ladies among us), plump; even comparing a woman to a ripe, succulent fruit has it's merits.

This is a careful walk to tread, and while I realize that it was a simple faux pas and that you did not imply anything mean, they just closed a 3-day long Bataan Death March of a thread by a guy who compared his eventually immobile paramour to something of the porcine variation.

Sensitivity runs deep here, and this forum is literally full of people who have been referred to in a derogatory manner for most of their lives by people who were never fat to begin with, people who were fat then became thin and others who look just like them but derided them out of spite and because it's still a socially-acceptable stereotype.
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Old 12-04-2007, 10:23 PM   #109
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Jumping over the cow pie and into the matter at hand.

A person can only be to fat if he or she (his or her):

1) health is in jepordy
2) mobility is unreasonobly impaired
3) quality of life is deminished as a direct result of the weight

My family has a history of diebetics, heart disease and collon cancer so I would not be comfortable at a weight above 230 lbs because I'd be woried about complications.
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Old 12-04-2007, 10:25 PM   #110
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I can only speak from a personal level. At one time, as a teen, I thought 200 was too fat for me to be...I felt the same about 300,once I past 200 and liked it. Now at 300 I'm thinking I could do 4 or 500. I'm not saying I will or won't, but the curiousity is there. My perspective of what was "too fat" changed with how comfortable I was (am) in my own skin at whatever I happen to be.
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Old 12-04-2007, 10:26 PM   #111
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Old 12-04-2007, 10:33 PM   #112
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As someone who's entering blob territory I found that comment pretty offensive.

There's nothing wrong with having preferences but it might be better to word them so they don't offend blobs and blobs to be. Even the shapeless have feelings .
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Old 12-04-2007, 11:51 PM   #113
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Default No Such Thing As Too Fat!

Well, I would like to reiterate.

There is no such thing as being too fat. The Fatter the better.

In the attached images below, it depicts how fat I would really love to be someday! I kid you not!

In the first image, I took one of my original photos of myself, and flipped it around, because I'm left handed, and we lefties tend to draw profiles facing toward the right, while right handed people tend to draw profiles facing toward the left.

Then, with my Paint application, I drew an outline around myself, and erased the background, and filled in the colors to make a cartoon version of myself. I also decided to lose the hat, and show off my bald head.

Then in the second and third images, I make myself fatter and fatter until I weight more than a ton!

These images show how fat I would love to become!

Does anyone here think these are too fat?
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File Type: jpg Teddy Bear 02.JPG (69.5 KB, 441 views)
File Type: jpg Teddy Bear - Pear Shaped 1 b.JPG (49.9 KB, 432 views)
File Type: jpg Teddy Bear - Pear Shaped 2 b.JPG (33.4 KB, 421 views)
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Old 12-05-2007, 03:48 AM   #114
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Originally Posted by stuffedyetthin View Post
Jumping over the cow pie and into the matter at hand.

A person can only be to fat if he or she (his or her):

1) health is in jepordy
2) mobility is unreasonobly impaired
3) quality of life is deminished as a direct result of the weight

My family has a history of diebetics, heart disease and collon cancer so I would not be comfortable at a weight above 230 lbs because I'd be woried about complications.
Fully understanding that there are other components of getting diabetes, and heart disease and colon cancer, that increase risk factors for getting sick.

Agreed but-

1/ A good number of Americans feel that 'somethings going to kill you' and that 'they' are always saying that something is unhealthy. Thing is health is only incramentally relative. None of us are made of steel, I had never heard of people purposly gaining large amounts of weight until I found this board, but just as when you start a new exercise regimin you should consult a physician if you plan to add lots of weight. There are a lot of enviornmental factors that go into staying healthy and if your wildly gaining, you may trigger something unwaranted.

2/ Problem with this is, if you've never been that mobile to begin with, this will be hard to get around. Losing mobility due to excessive weight gain, is so gradual and with age it becomes easier to not get up to do everything than realize that it's not so easy to get up to do things.

3/ Life Quality is whats truly relative. If your ambition is to keep up w/ Springer, then your right on pace if you keep watching it everyday. Health care is too expensive in the U.S. If walking a block has you clutching your chest, and your still fairly young (under 70) then I'd say that would be an impairment.

IMHO I feel that when you begin to need facilitators for you daily routine because of weight, it may be time to seek help. YES there are individuals w/ physical impairments that make it unatainable to lose much weight-I have an aunt like that, yet I feel that there is a concensus among a certain mindset that this affects many more than actually does.
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Old 12-05-2007, 10:36 AM   #115
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That's some serious 2-d fatness, Teddy Bear.

I like girls to be 5'5" ( my height ) or under, and judging from personal experience, somewhere between 180-220 ( 220 being the max, probably ) pounds is my preferred weight for a woman who is well-proportioned. I've had an experience with someone who was most certainly an SSBBW and it was'nt really my cup of tea.
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Old 12-05-2007, 10:48 AM   #116
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That's some serious 2-d fatness, Teddy Bear.
Yes, and the images I posted below show seriously how fat I hope to become some day!

I kid you not!

I would love to be the first human being to weigh more than a ton!
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Old 12-05-2007, 11:03 AM   #117
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My life until recently: On the rare occasion I DO find a person interested in me and who likes "fat" chicks, I'm almost always out of their range. I still don't understand why we have to bring this aspect to Dimensions. It is hurtful (unintended or otherwise) to any person who has had experiences similar to what I've just written.

"I like fat chicks, but you're TOO fat." It's just a hurtful thing.
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Old 12-05-2007, 11:19 AM   #118
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My life until recently: On the rare occasion I DO find a person interested in me and who likes "fat" chicks, I'm almost always out of their range. I still don't understand why we have to bring this aspect to Dimensions. It is hurtful (unintended or otherwise) to any person who has had experiences similar to what I've just written.

"I like fat chicks, but you're TOO fat." It's just a hurtful thing.


Absolutely agree with this, Tooz. Enough with the quantifying of people's bodies already; don't we get more than enough of that out in society?! Sure, everyone has their preferences, and will act on them too, and that is as it should be. But here, of all places, we who don't "fit in" with them don't need that fact rubbed in our faces.

And on another point, just because health and mobility may be threatened, doesn't mean it's any easier to lose weight than it ever was. Trust me on this. Some here talk as if weight is 100% personal choice, and completely controllable. It's not, folks. We can all do things to improve our health, but losing weight ain't necessarily, for all of us, one of 'em.
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Old 12-05-2007, 11:40 AM   #119
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I don't know if that post was directed at myself, Tooz, if so : I'm simply stating what is truthfully my preference, as the theme of the thread asks of the posters. And my preferences may very well just happen to exclude your body shape/weight. If you felt that I was trying to adapt the unwritten status-quo of size-ism ( if that's a word ) to this web-site, I'm sorry, that's not what I intended to do. I mean, its all apples and oranges, right? And is'nt discussing our preferences openly, while fostering acceptance and understanding the whole point of these forums? I understand your point of view, but can you see how I feel like mine is being admonished?

To answer your question, the reason why this gets brought to Dimensions is because everyone has different preferences, and Dimensions, as I see it, is about bringing everyone who has preferences in the 'fat admiration' category together. That's my 2 cents, and I did'nt mean to offend you.
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Old 12-05-2007, 12:02 PM   #120
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This -- the original question -- was a question posited on an erotic weight gain thread, not a generalized oh-please announce your prefs to the world thread. I think that's part of the reason why the parade of men announcing their cut-off point is seeming POINTLESS, hurtful, and in content (if not form) not that different from blob-talk. The question was not asked with the intent of collecting these responses, I don't think.

As it is, they just feel divisive. Please note: This has nothing to do with anybody's constitutional right to find whatever size they're into sexy, but rather with the wisdom of announcing it to a ROOM FULL O REALLY FAT GIRLS.
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Old 12-05-2007, 12:51 PM   #121
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I was about to post almost an essay's worth of writing as to why I think we've gotten off on the wrong foot completely from the start.

And then I read the entire 6 pages of thread, and this exchange has already happened about 2 or 3 times.

Then I realized that trying to explain anything is completely useless. I'll leave this one alone.
You might want to put the thread on ignore or something, Liz.
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Old 12-05-2007, 01:03 PM   #122
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To me, too fat is when I am mobility impaired and in pain all of the time. When I cannot take care of my own hygiene, drive a car, or live enough of a life to feel I have a life and can be a functioning half of a relationship. I've been there and it wasn't just too fat, it was way too fat.

How fat do I want to be? About 50 - 75 lbs less than I am now, which will still be plenty fat.

How fat do I want my partner to be? That's up to him. He doesn't like when he gains too much weight, so I imagine he'll be losing a bit. I love him whatever weight he is.
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Old 12-05-2007, 01:07 PM   #123
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This -- the original question -- was a question posited on an erotic weight gain thread, not a generalized oh-please announce your prefs to the world thread. I think that's part of the reason why the parade of men announcing their cut-off point is seeming POINTLESS, hurtful, and in content (if not form) not that different from blob-talk. The question was not asked with the intent of collecting these responses, I don't think.

As it is, they just feel divisive. Please note: This has nothing to do with anybody's constitutional right to find whatever size they're into sexy, but rather with the wisdom of announcing it to a ROOM FULL O REALLY FAT GIRLS.
Oh, Liz, I love you so much.
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Old 12-05-2007, 01:16 PM   #124
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Originally Posted by liz (di-va) View Post
This -- the original question -- was a question posited on an erotic weight gain thread, not a generalized oh-please announce your prefs to the world thread. I think that's part of the reason why the parade of men announcing their cut-off point is seeming POINTLESS, hurtful, and in content (if not form) not that different from blob-talk. The question was not asked with the intent of collecting these responses, I don't think.

As it is, they just feel divisive. Please note: This has nothing to do with anybody's constitutional right to find whatever size they're into sexy, but rather with the wisdom of announcing it to a ROOM FULL O REALLY FAT GIRLS.
Exactly. Which is why I answered it as I did.
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Old 12-05-2007, 01:35 PM   #125
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In my opinion too fat is when you can not get around or your health is affected by your weight. I got to that point, I was having a hard time walking for very long due to major back pain and a few other health issues as well. I dropped about 65lbs and feel way better.
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