Are you high maintenance?

[Piink]

Talking with a friend of mine today, and she told me I'm a bit high maintenance. I asked how and her response was, "You have a small dog who gets dressed in pink, you get your nails and hair done, you dress well, you have tons of makeup, your really picky about how your SO portrays themselves (that is when I have one!), you speak your mind quite often, and you hate the taste of beer".

I've honestly never thought of myself as a high maintenance. Right now, I'm about as high maintenance as a rotting carcass, and I honestly feel like one at this point in time. I'm sick as dog.

Even though I do have a lot of makeup products, I rarely wear most of it. I hardly ever do the bright crazy everyday makeup I used to do. And yes, my pooch is spoiled. Why not? I don't have kids. The rest I can't argue with!

Do you sound like I am high maintenance? Are you or been told you are?

[Sweet Tooth]

Originally Posted by Piink

Talking with a friend of mine today, and she told me I'm a bit high maintenance. I asked how and her response was, "You have a small dog who gets dressed in pink, you get your nails and hair done, you dress well, you have tons of makeup, your really picky about how your SO portrays themselves (that is when I have one!), you speak your mind quite often, and you hate the taste of beer".

I've honestly never thought of myself as a high maintenance. Right now, I'm about as high maintenance as a rotting carcass, and I honestly feel like one at this point in time. I'm sick as dog.

Even though I do have a lot of makeup products, I rarely wear most of it. I hardly ever do the bright crazy everyday makeup I used to do. And yes, my pooch is spoiled. Why not? I don't have kids. The rest I can't argue with!

Do you sound like I am high maintenance? Are you or been told you are?

My ex used to tell me I was high maintenance. Apparently not being a doormat put me in that category. And then I watch something like Bridezillas and say, "Um, no, if we want comparisons, I'm actually low-to-moderate." Then again, some people see maintenance as an outward, physical, fashion thing. And some focus more on personal strength or opinions.

Still... even if I were truly high maintenance, I'd like to think a man who loves me thinks I'm worth every bit of it.

[Pandasaur]

You don't sound high maintenance at all, actually anyone who likes things a certain way could be known as high maintenance, pretty much everyone is. I get told that all the time. I love makeup, clothes, I think beer tastes horrible and so on. I only drink mixed drinks. I spoil myself all the time since no one else will

And when I do start dating I will definitely continue to spoil myself

[CarlaSixx]

I'm far from high maintenance. Hardly ever wear makeup. My nails are never ever done. Do my hair real quick if even at all. Dress well, but that's because I only buy business casual clothing. Chucks over dress shoes.

But I have been called high maintenance before. But that was because they weren't used to "fat girl needs" and wasn't expecting me to have standards for daily living activities. Once they got to know me even better, they realized it was just for accessibility, and not a high maintenance thing.

[Piink]

Maybe I should re-re-re-read before I post.

Neither one of these questions make any sense.

Do you sound like I am high maintenance? Are you or been told you are?

I never thought I was high maintenance because I always believed I was just making sure I was presentable to the world.

But then again, I have been known to walk into a gas station covered in mud, sweat, tears, blood, etc. That is definitely not high maintenance!

[toni]

I am very high maintenance and proud of it. My hair, make up and nails are not always perfect but I think there is more to it than that. I demand to be treated with respect. If you are not doing that, I will call you out on the spot. That way there are no misunderstandings or assumptions. END OF STORY. It works very well for me.

At the same time, I am giving and sweet. I treat everyone with the same level of respect I demand. I don't care if it is a CEO or a homeless person. Everyone is a human with feelings. High maintenance does not equal bitch.

Stand tall and confident ladies! Embrace the high maintenance title.

[loopytheone]

I'm not high maintenance at all. I don't think being high or low maintenance is something to be proud of because either way you are just looking down on people who aren't like you.

I brush my hair before I leave the house but that is all I do, I never do my nails or makeup (unless we are going out clubbing then I'll wear makeup but I very rarely do that). I don't like fancy clothes, I don't like clothes shopping and I am happy to do whatever will make my friends happy if I have the time. But for the most part a fun evening for me is staying in with my friends or partner and playing video games or watching tv and just chatting the night away. I don't like being taken out places or all that rubbish, just isn't my thing.

Though I do have a moderately sized dog that is occasionally dressed in pink, but she is more often found covered in mud so I don't think she adds to my maintenance score! =p

[Dr. Feelgood]

No one so far has offered a definition of what "high maintenance" actually means, so here's my own working definition of the term. If you spend more than you make, you're high maintenance. If you spend less than you make, you're low maintenance. If you spend exactly what you make, you're better at arithmetic than I am.

[Sweet Tooth]

Originally Posted by Dr. Feelgood

No one so far has offered a definition of what "high maintenance" actually means, so here's my own working definition of the term. If you spend more than you make, you're high maintenance. If you spend less than you make, you're low maintenance. If you spend exactly what you make, you're better at arithmetic than I am.

LOL That's good. But how about this add-on? If you demand someone else spend what they make to subsidize you getting what you want or you throw a hissy fit... you're high maintenance. Or, you know, that whole having a backbone thing apparently makes you that too.

[CastingPearls]

You don't sound high-maintenance to me, but I'm biased. Allow me to explain.

I've been described as high maintenance by several people, but certainly not people who love me and know me well. I am choosy. I dress beautifully. I have what some call 'high-falutin'' tastes and I speak my mind.

It depends on who uses the term and why. Some people use it disparagingly. In the area I grew up, a woman (never EVER a man) who was confident was referred to as someone who 'thought who the hell she was' and the consensus was that she needed to be brought down a peg. In my experience, misogyny by women is far more insidious than that used by men. Truly confident women were trail-blazers but paid the price by being outliers. This is true even today, everywhere. In some countries, they pay with their life.

The term, however, can be used endearingly. My best friend refers to me as a neon peacock and herself as a brown hen. When I protest, she says she likes being the brown hen. It's safer for her because she's shy. I also think that there are many men who prefer the 'girl next door' to the 'glamour girl' which is fine with me. I don't want to be with someone who is turned off by my affectations, indulgences and peccadilloes. I like a man who considers me a worthy partner and while a challenge, completely worth it. Because I am. With no apologies.

[Dr. Feelgood]

Originally Posted by CastingPearls

I've been described as high maintenance by several people, but certainly not people who love me and know me well. I am choosy. I dress beautifully. I have what some call 'high-falutin'' tastes and I speak my mind.

There's a difference between high maintenance and elegance. I know men and women who spend a small fortune on clothes and accessories yet look like refugees from some disaster. OTOH, there are the few -- the very few -- who can look elegant even while wearing a sock monkey hat.

[spiritangel]

Originally Posted by Sweet Tooth

My ex used to tell me I was high maintenance. Apparently not being a doormat put me in that category. And then I watch something like Bridezillas and say, "Um, no, if we want comparisons, I'm actually low-to-moderate." Then again, some people see maintenance as an outward, physical, fashion thing. And some focus more on personal strength or opinions.

Still... even if I were truly high maintenance, I'd like to think a man who loves me thinks I'm worth every bit of it.

You know a couple of my exes have said I am high maitanance for the same reasons I like to be ontime for things, and have mutual respect etc

I am not a huge girly girl in the sense I don't wear make up often, and I have never really been a hair and nails person (not bad if you are just not my thing)

crafting is a part of that no point paying a fortune for fancy nails that will get paint, ink and other splatters and be ruined.

I think it depends on who you ask do I have expectations of being treated well and with respect yes.

Will I call you on your bs yes

will I play doormat hell no

I see high maitanance as someone who constantly needs a high level of attention, who can be financially draining to be with, who often has to have the latest and greatest stuff to keep up with the joneses so to speak, who rarely lets their partner have a life of their own, and who is often in many ways somewhat controlling but that could just be me

appearance is an indavidual thing I don't see wanting to look good or do beauty things as the whole high maitanence thing unless it is you know taking 2-3hrs to get ready to go out every time then it would get a bit old pretty fast.

I think we all have diff views on what those words mean to begin with.

I think its funny my exes thought I was considering they never were told they could not go somewhere or do things with others, I never stopped them from doing things they wanted to do with or without me, I encouraged them, did nice things for them, do not have the expectation of living in someones pocket so to speak. But such is life sometimes people see the need for mutual respect and to be treated respectfully as High Maitenance shrugs

[melinda333]

There's two definitions of high maintenance that I know, the beauty related and the money related.

Even though I shop quite a bit, I never buy anything expensive, or expect expensive gifts. I try to buy the cheapest I can for a quality item. I always have my nails done, and my hair is never unkempt, it's always clean and moisturized...and roots never show (I dye it a natural shade of red). I think it looks cute even in a bun. I wear casual clothes that fit me well and look nice, mainly skirts and dresses. I wear some makeup, powder and lipstick mostly.

I don't think I'm high maintenance but some would think so. Nothing I do takes "time", but it's not like I can just grab any jeans and T shirt either. I do have to search for my clothes and some specific beauty products, but most of the time now it's just grab and go, because I know what to buy.

I do blow dry half my hair everyday (5-10 min)...which is the only troublesome/annoying (high maintenence?) part.

Hating beer is irrelevant. :P

[CastingPearls]

What I find really sad is this apologetic tone that women are taking and feeling the need to explain themselves and separate themselves from 'those women'. Why are we explaining our behavior to avoid falling into some ambiguous category men and women alike use to keep women down, to attempt (often successfully) to make them feel bad for being themselves, for wanting good things, for defining THEIR ideas of ambition?

To the best of my knowledge, this term isn't used (or perhaps, commonly used) for men nor does it have a male counterpart which furthers my belief that this is yet another insidious form of misogyny that changes at the whim of the accuser AND accusee (not me! *I* don't do X, I SWEAR!!!, Oh, I'm not ridiculously this or that) already stepping away from the untouchables. Really?
You do realize as women, that you've been punked, don't you? You've allowed yourselves to be cornered and pigeonholed into thinking that if you're anything other than compliant and smart BUT NOT TOO SMART, as in smarter than men perhaps, and beautiful, BUT NOT TOO BEAUTIFUL lest we become arrogant....the list goes on and does because we play the game so willingly, that no matter what you do, you fail. It's set up that way.

What does it benefit you or me to play the game? Do we win a prize? Is that prize A MAN? Or perhaps the approval of other women? How do you know when you step outside such vague guidelines? Aren't you tired of being categorized and always found wanting, never quite enough because by being yourself you've failed according to those who continue to play the game?

I don't like this game. So I'm not playing it. And I don't play well with others who play well with others. I'm more the 'runs with scissors' crowd anyway.

[Surlysomething]

High maintenance? What is that really?
I think it varies with everyone.

I personally don't like to take more than 30 - 45 mins to get ready. That's shower, dress, makeup, hair, out the door. Unless it's a special occasion.

Do I like getting my hair done? Yes. Do I like getting pedicures? Yes.
I work hard. I can do whatever I want, whenever I want. Screw everyone else and their opinions. Haha.

[Dr. Feelgood]

Originally Posted by CastingPearls

To the best of my knowledge, this term isn't used (or perhaps, commonly used) for men nor does it have a male counterpart.

A high maintenance man is one who doesn't pick up after himself. A high maintenance woman is one who doesn't pick up after him, either.

[Saoirse]

If you own a dog that sits in your purse, you're high maintanence

[CastingPearls]

How many pounds does her dog have to weigh for a woman to be regarded as high-maintenance?
How many men does a woman have to sleep with to be regarded as a slut?

Why don't we comprehend or care that objectifying women hurts everyone?

[snuggletiger]

__________

[Saoirse]

No more than 5 lbs. I deal with women like this allllll the time.

[Piink]

Originally Posted by Saoirse

No more than 5 lbs. I deal with women like this allllll the time.

Sage is 5lbs. But I also refuse to stick her in some purse. She walks on her harness or if she gets tired (which happens when you have short legs) or we are in a high traffic area, I will carry her. And I will never push her in one of those doggy strollers.

And in all honesty, I started the thread as it was a silly conversation between me and a girl I have known literally my entire life. It was all in good jest as she knows I am no where near high maintenance.

[Saoirse]

I got no prob with high maintanence ladies. I just gave an answer.

[Piink]

Originally Posted by Saoirse

I got no prob with high maintanence ladies. I just gave an answer.

I didn't think you did. Just saying why I started the thread in general.

[Saoirse]

Originally Posted by Piink

I didn't think you did. Just saying why I started the thread in general.

Oh yea sorry. Wasn't directed at ya really. Just 'splaining myself. Of course I'm a huge slut, so I can't say much.

Also- if you've ever dated my older brother, you're high maintanence! Haha

[Piink]

Originally Posted by Saoirse

Oh yea sorry. Wasn't directed at ya really. Just 'splaining myself. Of course I'm a huge slut, so I can't say much.

Also- if you've ever dated my older brother, you're high maintanence! Haha

I'm pretty sure if your family saves your number under "Slut Puppy" you've got a problem! Ask me how I know!!