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Old 12-14-2013, 12:03 PM   #1
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Default How can I encourage my bf to gain weight?

I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight. He's tall and thin, and while I know that he's not entirely comfortable with his size (he's worried about being "gangly"), I don't feel ready to actually tell him about my preferences yet.

What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use?

He's not much of a snacker, although I have been buying him biscuits and chocolates! I was hoping for some tips to just get him eating a little bit more, and thought this forum was the perfect place to get some opinions!

Thanks everyone!
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Old 12-14-2013, 01:28 PM   #2
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The best advice is to be honest with him about it, trying to do it sneakily is just going to cause trouble in the long term. I'f he's said that he doesn't want to be gangly anymore then you should just mention that you'd actually think the weight would suit him.
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Old 12-14-2013, 02:29 PM   #3
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First a question: why do you want him to gain? Is it that you like BHM and you want him to become one? or is it that you think his current weight is unhealthy and you want him to be a "normal weight" (for lack of a better term)?

The latter would be a lot different conversation than the former. Neither would be easy, but asking someone to gain for health is different than asking them to do so for your sexual preference. Either way, I think you should be honest with him about how you feel. I assume that since he is your bf, you have been together for a while and it is not too early in the relationship to do this (e.g., third date is not a good time to tell a guy you wished he looked different). If you have a good relationship, you should be able to discuss anything, and being forced to hide how you feel is not healthy.

My one tip would be to tell him that you are just letting him know how you feel because you value honesty in the relationship, but that you don't necessarily expect him to act on what you tell him. And you had better mean that. Also, bring it up the once and see how he reacts. If it is badly, I wouldn't push it again. But he may be ok with it. You'll never know until you talk to him.

Good luck!

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Old 12-14-2013, 05:52 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by Joanagrace View Post
I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight. He's tall and thin, and while I know that he's not entirely comfortable with his size (he's worried about being "gangly"), I don't feel ready to actually tell him about my preferences yet.

What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use?

He's not much of a snacker, although I have been buying him biscuits and chocolates! I was hoping for some tips to just get him eating a little bit more, and thought this forum was the perfect place to get some opinions!

Thanks everyone!
I realize this may not be popular with some around here, and there's technically nothing wrong with having preferences for something your partner isn't while still loving said partner...

But please be careful about how you present this. I dated a gangly guy who just can't keep weight on without really trying. Unfortunately, knowing I drooled over a different body type made him extra self-conscious about not meeting my preferences. The thing is that I absolutely loved him far more than my preference.

It doesn't mean you can't express that you're amenable to efforts to help him gain if he's interested, but probably decide if it's a dealbreaker if he won't or can't get larger. You can express it in such a way that he knows that it's entirely his choice what to do to change something in his life and that you support him either way [if you truly do... I wouldn't lie about it and then undermine him later].

Aside from that, if it were the reverse and someone who dated me preferred me being smaller and kept bringing home diet types of food, I'd be really uncomfortable.
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Old 12-14-2013, 08:41 PM   #5
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sweet tooth is nicer than i am. i'm just going to say it. why can't you just leave him alone and love him for who he is and what HE wants to be. this isn't love. he deserves to be respected. if you can't do that leave him alone.
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Old 12-15-2013, 02:00 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by Joanagrace View Post
I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight. He's tall and thin, and while I know that he's not entirely comfortable with his size (he's worried about being "gangly"), I don't feel ready to actually tell him about my preferences yet.

What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use?

He's not much of a snacker, although I have been buying him biscuits and chocolates! I was hoping for some tips to just get him eating a little bit more, and thought this forum was the perfect place to get some opinions!

Thanks everyone!
My advice is to leave him be and find someone who is more to your liking.
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Old 12-15-2013, 02:28 AM   #7
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sweet tooth is nicer than i am. i'm just going to say it. why can't you just leave him alone and love him for who he is and what HE wants to be. this isn't love. he deserves to be respected. if you can't do that leave him alone.
I tried to rep this but failed. It strikes me as really interesting how when a guy comes onto the forums like the guy in the weight gain board recently and mentions wanting a partner to gain weight they are treated as horrible feeders or trolls and yet when a woman says the same thing about her partner everybody is so careful and understanding. It isn't better to treat your partner like this just because you happen to be a woman.
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Old 12-15-2013, 04:41 AM   #8
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I tried to rep this but failed. It strikes me as really interesting how when a guy comes onto the forums like the guy in the weight gain board recently and mentions wanting a partner to gain weight they are treated as horrible feeders or trolls and yet when a woman says the same thing about her partner everybody is so careful and understanding. It isn't better to treat your partner like this just because you happen to be a woman.
male feeders are vilified here, female feeders are the norm on the BHM/FFA section. Go figure

then again, aside from that one incident, the female feeders here have a infinitely cleaner record
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Old 12-15-2013, 06:18 PM   #9
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male feeders are vilified here, female feeders are the norm on the BHM/FFA section. Go figure

then again, aside from that one incident, the female feeders here have a infinitely cleaner record
Ah yes, the infamous poop milk shake thread. How I wish I could scrub those images from my mind.
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Old 12-15-2013, 08:37 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Joanagrace View Post
I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight. He's tall and thin, and while I know that he's not entirely comfortable with his size (he's worried about being "gangly"), I don't feel ready to actually tell him about my preferences yet.

What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use?

He's not much of a snacker, although I have been buying him biscuits and chocolates! I was hoping for some tips to just get him eating a little bit more, and thought this forum was the perfect place to get some opinions!

Thanks everyone!
If he's not comfortable with his size, then asking him to change his body is going to make any body issues he has worse.

If this is really something that's essential to you, I don't think that you're likely going to find it with the guy you're with right now. You have to think about it and decide if the body you want him to have is more important than what you have with him right now.

And if you're thinking of doing it without his knowledge or consent, please go sit on your hand til it's numb and then try to shave your pubes. And reconsider it while you do that.
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Old 12-15-2013, 09:23 PM   #11
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ask him if he wants to
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Old 12-16-2013, 12:59 PM   #12
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It really is pretty much the only thing you need to do.
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Old 12-16-2013, 06:29 PM   #13
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if he really wanted to be fat i would think he would have already said something or done something by now. look, i'm fat. i want to be fat. so i AM fat. not that complicated. if a guy asked me to change to be thinner, exercise and diet because of his own personal preferences, i'd tell him to go to hell --as he well should.
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Old 12-17-2013, 07:55 AM   #14
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I would like to hope that people who spend much time here have been educated enough on the topic to not try and change someone's body without their agreement. But in all fairness, it is pretty common for young FA to fall for someone, then with that person would get fat, and try to encourage them to do so. It sort of makes sense if your view is 'well, the only thing stopping people from getting fat is that they think they'll never get a partner, but I like him/her fat, so really there shouldn't be any barrier at all, what is the big deal?"

If the two of you talk about it, and agree, then it isn't a big deal. But people have all sorts of reasons for wanting to be one size or another, besides the whole hooking up bit, and more importantly it is there body and deliberate changes to it should come from them.

Now, if I look at just the first couple of paragraphs, and deliberately mis-read them.....

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Originally Posted by Joanagrace View Post
I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight. He's tall and thin, and while I know that he's not entirely comfortable with his size (he's worried about being "gangly"), I don't feel ready to actually tell him about my preferences yet.

What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use?
I could interpret that as "What are the common methods ladies (or men) on here use to tell their partner?" That would be a pretty awesome question to ask, because there can be ways to approach the issue without just blurting it out. So...you might consider asking that question? (or looking around here for other threads where this has been discussed)

Although, I wonder if your preference is for it to be out in the open, or for it to just happen that he gets fat? I took a glance back at your older posts, including your story, and the central fantasy of the story seems to be about being fascinated by a friend who just keeps gaining. If that is the case, you have a much harder time, because very few people will just spontaneously start gaining weight, and equally few will be happy with the results if they get manipulated into gaining.
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Old 12-17-2013, 06:49 PM   #15
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if he really wanted to be fat i would think he would have already said something or done something by now. look, i'm fat. i want to be fat. so i AM fat. not that complicated.
I can soooo relate to that
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Old 12-18-2013, 08:37 AM   #16
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Apparently I could neither type, spell, nor proof-read yesterday when I wrote that post. Since I can do the latter today, a couple of corrections

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. ..... But in all fairness, it is pretty common for young FA to fall for someone, then wish that person would get fat, and try to encourage them to do so. ......


...... and more importantly it is their body and deliberate changes to it should come from them.
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Old 01-11-2014, 10:44 PM   #17
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The easiest way to a guys heart is through his stomach. I know when someone wants to cook for me I think it's the best thing ever. I am a fat gluttonous nitwit who likes to eat and is always hungry but that might work for him.
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Old 01-20-2014, 11:42 PM   #18
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Since it doesn't seem you're going to tell him directly (being that you may be a closeted fat lover/chubby chaser), you could cook his favorite dishes, or hit places where you both enjoy. Knowing full well you may gain a lb or 3, but at the same point, you get to see him gain too. Going on a cruise together for 7 to 10 days can lead to some weight gain for some.
Knowing if he is adamant about getting fat; you have your answer and decide what you want to do from there, (along with keeping your intentions/desires to yourself) whether you choose to stay or move on.
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Old 01-21-2014, 02:50 AM   #19
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Since it doesn't seem you're going to tell him directly (being that you may be a closeted fat lover/chubby chaser), you could cook his favorite dishes, or hit places where you both enjoy. Knowing full well you may gain a lb or 3, but at the same point, you get to see him gain too. Going on a cruise together for 7 to 10 days can lead to some weight gain for some.
Knowing if he is adamant about getting fat; you have your answer and decide what you want to do from there, (along with keeping your intentions/desires to yourself) whether you choose to stay or move on.
Yeah but then you have to admit to yourself you are chicken shit and also pretty selfish and manipulative.

Fuck, I'd rather just admit I love fatties.
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Old 01-21-2014, 05:59 AM   #20
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Since it doesn't seem you're going to tell him directly (being that you may be a closeted fat lover/chubby chaser), you could cook his favorite dishes, or hit places where you both enjoy. Knowing full well you may gain a lb or 3, but at the same point, you get to see him gain too. Going on a cruise together for 7 to 10 days can lead to some weight gain for some.
Knowing if he is adamant about getting fat; you have your answer and decide what you want to do from there, (along with keeping your intentions/desires to yourself) whether you choose to stay or move on.
Yeah, manipulation and dishonesty is soooooooo sexy. UGH.

TALK TO HIM. TELL HIM HOW YOU FEEL AND WHAT YOU LIKE AND WHAT YOU WANT.
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Old 01-21-2014, 02:35 PM   #21
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Since it doesn't seem you're going to tell him directly (being that you may be a closeted fat lover/chubby chaser), you could cook his favorite dishes, or hit places where you both enjoy. Knowing full well you may gain a lb or 3, but at the same point, you get to see him gain too. Going on a cruise together for 7 to 10 days can lead to some weight gain for some.
Knowing if he is adamant about getting fat; you have your answer and decide what you want to do from there, (along with keeping your intentions/desires to yourself) whether you choose to stay or move on.
Are you seriously for real?
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Old 01-21-2014, 05:01 PM   #22
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Originally Posted by GordoNegro View Post
Since it doesn't seem you're going to tell him directly (being that you may be a closeted fat lover/chubby chaser), you could cook his favorite dishes, or hit places where you both enjoy. Knowing full well you may gain a lb or 3, but at the same point, you get to see him gain too. Going on a cruise together for 7 to 10 days can lead to some weight gain for some.
Knowing if he is adamant about getting fat; you have your answer and decide what you want to do from there, (along with keeping your intentions/desires to yourself) whether you choose to stay or move on.
What you're saying here amounts to manipulation and underhanded measures to make this shit happen.

Reconsider your fucking thought processes, because this is seriously wrong.
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Old 01-21-2014, 08:07 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by Joanagrace View Post
I was just hoping for some tips to subtly encourage my boyfriend to gain some weight.
1. Ask him if he wants to.
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Old 01-21-2014, 11:46 PM   #24
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If you try to do it secretly and he doesn't feel like gaining and he feels that he's gaining, he will feel manipulated and worse lied to and that could damage the structure of the relationship and could cause irrevocable damage.
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Old 01-23-2014, 10:54 PM   #25
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there is nothing good about being sneaky and manipulative
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