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Old 03-10-2014, 04:15 PM   #1
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Default Fashion Police

so obviously fat guys are uber-hot no matter what they're wearing, but what kinds of outfits push the attraction factor over the edge for you?

ladies, if you were dressing a guy for a date, what would he wear? and/or gentlemen, what kinds of styles make you look and feel hot?

for casual clothes, imho there is nothing more attractive than a chubby guy in a fitted t-shirt and cargo shorts. for fancy occasions, a suit jacket and pants with a dress shirt unbuttoned at the collar and a vest. (besides the look of it, i'm a shameless tease so i like that this outfit has layers. first the jacket, then the vest, then the oxford, then an undershirt...sigh.)

on my list of what NOT to wear? neckties (idk what exactly it is that i find so ugly about ties but ugh, they just look silly, like the guy is wearing a leash or something. if you're not wearing a necktie, you look just the right mix of dressed and disheveled, like you just came from a secret impromptu makeout session in the gardens during a lavish ball). & Oversized baggy shirts (you are gorgeous, it's not fair to your admirers to hide behind a giant shirt!)

what about you?

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Old 03-10-2014, 04:52 PM   #2
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The title of your post "Fashion Police" touched a sore point with me today.

This morning I was actually looking through the boards, reading the many interesting or funny new things that have popped up lately. Then I turned to the awesome pic thread, where indeed the pics showed nice looking guys in .... unflattering fashion disasters!

Checks too loud for a 70's hillbilly B-movie, faded vultures, Bridget-Jones-memorial-Xmas-horror-sweaters .....

In my frustration I started a post 'Guys, we love you ... but we need to talk about your choice of shirts..." - and then decided to be a good, polite, respectful FFA, didn't post, deleted it instead.

As you can see, this decision of politeness over fashion policing has been nagging me all day!

So in the spirit of the new snack exchange thread - will you SS/BHM around here let us play fashion police?
Come up with outfit ideas, fashion advice and suggestions we would like to see you in?? Bring out the visual best in you? Please .....
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Old 03-10-2014, 04:58 PM   #3
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Hows about I wear what ever I want and thats the end of it. Actually while im on the point his sweater made him happy, so go jump down a hole.

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Old 03-10-2014, 05:09 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by agouderia View Post

Checks too loud for a 70's hillbilly B-movie, faded vultures, Bridget-Jones-memorial-Xmas-horror-sweaters .....

In my frustration I started a post 'Guys, we love you ... but we need to talk about your choice of shirts..." - and then decided to be a good, polite, respectful FFA, didn't post, deleted it instead.
I find it really funny that you instead posted a description where someone could discern exactly which pictures you're talking about

-

As someone who delights in finding bargains at thrift stores, I really can't say I'm one to care hugely about the fashion of my date. As long as they're not swimming in it, or completely squished into it (ah...at least when we're in public...) then we're good. Though, I will say that a casual t-shirt with a unbuttoned button-down is generally pretty pleasing. Just something that hugs the curves enough to let me creep shamelessly. I've put even less thought into formal-wear, because most people I've dated hated it. One did end up wearing a dress at a show we went to once
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Old 03-10-2014, 05:16 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by biglynch View Post
Hows about I wear what ever I want and thats the end of it.
Couldn't rep you, but I would like to publicly second this motion. Wearing what looks good to you, conforms to your own personal sense of style and feels good ----> hotness.

Nothing personal, I understand the good intention behind this. I'd just like to raise my hand as an FFA who's thought process regarding fashion (in general and pertaining to BHMs) falls more on this ^^^ side of the fence. Though nothing should prevent/discourage a willing participant from seeking advice here.
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Old 03-10-2014, 06:28 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by ODFFA View Post
Wearing what looks good to you, conforms to your own personal sense of style and feels good ----> hotness.
This. Everybody has his or her own style; once you find it, it becomes a part of you. Mine runs to Edwardian vests (the gaudier, the better) with a watch chain (and a watch), bow ties with matching pocket squares, and trousers with pleats, cuffs, and the sharpest creases I can manage. And, if I go outside, a hat. No, not a baseball cap. I have several, but the two I seem to always find myself wearing are a grey homburg (for winter) or a Panama (for summer). It's idiosyncratic, but it makes me feel good!
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Old 03-10-2014, 06:48 PM   #7
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BL, were you the little red-faced kid stomping your feet and holding your breath when they tried to make you put in your Sunday clothes when you were a kid?

Actually, this isn't a bad idea ladies, but I would refrain from tearing apart someone else's choices unless they asked for it. Some guys a little touchy about that kind of thing.

For me it's cargo shorts and big comfy t-shirts and flip-flops in the summer. Jeans and either motorcycle boots or cowboy boots any other time. I do like wearing suits but few occasions. When I do, I prefer an Italian cut to any other, I like the more open and laid back style compared to say an English tailored suit. I like to pair it with a nice silk or linen shirt, open collar, I don't mind ties but prefer not wearing them. I also like to wear exotic western boots with it instead of dress shoes.
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Old 03-10-2014, 07:07 PM   #8
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Ostrich for the boots?


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Originally Posted by LeoGibson View Post
BL, were you the little red-faced kid stomping your feet and holding your breath when they tried to make you put in your Sunday clothes when you were a kid?

Actually, this isn't a bad idea ladies, but I would refrain from tearing apart someone else's choices unless they asked for it. Some guys a little touchy about that kind of thing.

For me it's cargo shorts and big comfy t-shirts and flip-flops in the summer. Jeans and either motorcycle boots or cowboy boots any other time. I do like wearing suits but few occasions. When I do, I prefer an Italian cut to any other, I like the more open and laid back style compared to say an English tailored suit. I like to pair it with a nice silk or linen shirt, open collar, I don't mind ties but prefer not wearing them. I also like to wear exotic western boots with it instead of dress shoes.
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Old 03-10-2014, 07:22 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by LeoGibson View Post

Actually, this isn't a bad idea ladies, but I would refrain from tearing apart someone else's choices unless they asked for it. Some guys a little touchy about that kind of thing.
i don't want to tear down anyone; that is not the intent of this thread. imho the whole point of fashion is that it's a fun way to express yourself, and i think it's interesting what different people like and/or dislike as far as style.
if you think that asking people about their fashion pet peeves is too negative, then nevermind that and let's just focus on the positives and on what you DO like.

BL of course i agree you should wear whatever you like! i just asked everyone, what is it that you like? to be honest i don't exactly know what i said that made you angry, but if i have offended you or anyone else, I sincerely apologize.

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Old 03-10-2014, 07:27 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by cinnamitch View Post
Ostrich for the boots?
My black ones are. I have a really nice pair of Cognac colored eel skin too. I would like to get a pair of chocolate Caiman alligator when I have a chance to round out my boots. Of course I have the regular cow, bull, and kid skin ropers for regular wear.
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Old 03-10-2014, 07:37 PM   #11
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Aaah, A true Texan. We do love our boots.

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Originally Posted by LeoGibson View Post
My black ones are. I have a really nice pair of Cognac colored eel skin too. I would like to get a pair of chocolate Caiman alligator when I have a chance to round out my boots. Of course I have the regular cow, bull, and kid skin ropers for regular wear.
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Old 03-10-2014, 07:48 PM   #12
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Default It depends

Depends on what we will be doing....

Personally I like guys in jeans and a button down with a jacket if we are going to dinner at a nice place. (I find a man dressed this way very sexy)

If we are going to a game, I would expect him to be in jeans and some kind of jersey.

If we are just hanging around the house.. he better be in boxer shorts and a tshirt...

As to foot wear,

If you are wearing sneakers, then they better look like you just brought them and took them out of the box.

But to each his own. I have been known to go to places were the other person will be comfortable according to how he is already dressed.

There are some fights worth fighting, there are some that is best to let go.

THE ONE THING I DO NOT LIKE IS MEN WEARING PANTS THAT HANG OFF THEIR ASS!!!!! That is just plain disrespectful.
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Old 03-11-2014, 12:04 AM   #13
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No one is taking my bunny ears away from me, gosh darn it!
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Old 03-11-2014, 12:23 AM   #14
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Model outfits for attractive women? I'd gladly go shopping with any FFAs looking to play image consultant. /can-do

Even to places that aren't my usual Army surplus stores.
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Old 03-11-2014, 01:37 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by biglynch View Post
Hows about I wear what ever I want and thats the end of it. Actually while im on the point his sweater made him happy, so go jump down a hole.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ODFFA View Post
Couldn't rep you, but I would like to publicly second this motion. Wearing what looks good to you, conforms to your own personal sense of style and feels good ----> hotness.
This, exactly. I don't know why exactly a bunch of stuck up people who think they know better than everyone else have the right to go around criticizing what other people are wearing and telling them that they are wearing the wrong thing. It isn't the place of anybody to go around telling other people what they should and shouldn't wear and if somebody did it to me they would leave with a black eye. Incredibly rude to go around bashing somebody else's fashion choices when they didn't ask for your opinion, especially doing so in behind their back like this.

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Originally Posted by terpsichore View Post
BL of course i agree you should wear whatever you like! i just asked everyone, what is it that you like? to be honest i don't exactly know what i said that made you angry, but if i have offended you or anyone else, I sincerely apologize.
Well read what I put above and you will find out. You started this thread by publicly criticizing the clothing choices of the people who are brave enough to post pictures on this forum without their permission or asking you to do it and you did so behind their back on another thread. How would you like it if I looked at pictures you posted on this forum and then started a thread called 'FFA fashion disasters', described your outfit and said how horrible I thought it was? Huge lack of respect here. The BHM on this forum are human beings not your personal wank fodder.
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Old 03-11-2014, 01:44 AM   #16
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So I have no problem talking about fashion and fashion disasters and such, but I'm kind of conflicted when it comes to judging fat fashion because of problems with access. Finding clothes when you're fat is difficult enough, but finding fashionable clothes when fat? Good luck. Personally, I would love to overhaul my wardrobe and fill it with some of the trendy, affordable wear that smaller guys can get. But my personal style is informed more by what I can fit in and afford than my tastes in clothing. So could a hypothetical fat guy be wearing a shirt that's two sizes too big on purpose? Sure. But I think it's just as likely that he's just throwing on whatever he can find that fits, no matter how poor that fit is.

Plus, taste is very subjective. I try not to force my own style on others. Even if the idea of wearing a suit makes me itch.
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Old 03-11-2014, 02:48 AM   #17
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BL of course i agree you should wear whatever you like! i just asked everyone, what is it that you like? to be honest i don't exactly know what i said that made you angry, but if i have offended you or anyone else, I sincerely apologize.
No issues with you, I should have quoted agouderias offering. Let me clear myself up on this. Anyone who knows me know a I will always go for the insane and odd shirts, bright colours and retro cuts because I like it and I refuse to be Mr grey, just because I'm a fatass. Regardless of what others think I feel I dress well. Anyways I encourage people to use this thread positively and if you want ideas go nuts. I would advise http://www.jacamo.co.uk is a good place to look for us UK based peeps.

LG, I was captain hand me down mccharity shop as a kid. I threw plenty of strops.
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Old 03-11-2014, 05:34 AM   #18
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Actually, terpsichore, I think you started this thread off on quite a positive note and I have no doubt as to your intention (not my favourite thread title, but that's really neither here nor there). Especially since the individuality of style has been recognised, I see no reason why we can't have very interesting, constructive exchanges here about how we perceive style, etc

You asked some great discussion questions. I'll share my take on them :>

I'm not sure I'd ever really.... dress a guy for a date or anything else. What I will tend to do with someone I'm dating is make a big deal about any outfit that particularly strikes my fancy. That way, if he does feel motivated to wear/buy that kind of thing even more (since it's already something he gravitated towards himself), win-win!

I myself am a huge fan of button-down shirts too. A bit of smart casual, I guess. And I do prefer them untucked and.... buttoned up. Don't know, I just have a thing for it. That's the one melt-worthy thing that stands out, but there are so many other ways of dressing I'd go weak at the knees for.

There are honestly very few no-nos to me. If I happen to fall in love with T-Shirt Guy, it'll mean there's an attraction and it wouldn't make a difference to me at all if he never wore a button-down.
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Old 03-11-2014, 05:40 AM   #19
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Well read what I put above and you will find out. You started this thread by publicly criticizing the clothing choices of the people who are brave enough to post pictures on this forum without their permission or asking you to do it and you did so behind their back on another thread.
are you sure you're referring to my post, and not the one below it? because the only thing i said that could be considered negative is that i don't like ties or shirts that are purposely too big. and so what? if a guy loves ties and/or baggy shirts more power to him!

I don't think for a second that anyone should change what they wear based on someone else's opinion. like i said, i started this thread because i think it's interesting to see different people's tastes and styles. now of course i'm sorry i did.

the title meant to be a rip off of the TV show of the same name. i would gladly change it if that's what is causing offense, except this board apparently doesn't allow edits after a certain point time-wise.

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Old 03-11-2014, 05:53 AM   #20
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I myself am a huge fan of button-down shirts too. A bit of smart casual, I guess. And I do prefer them untucked and.... buttoned down. Don't know, I just have a thing for it. That's the one melt-worthy thing that stands out, but there are so many other ways of dressing I'd go weak at the knees for.
This illustrates the tricky nature of fashion do's and don'ts.
There's probably an equal number of women who hate untucked shirts. You try to cater to some, you lose others.
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Old 03-11-2014, 05:55 AM   #21
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No one is taking my bunny ears away from me, gosh darn it!
no one would dream of it! i was only suggesting a diamond-studded pair for special occasions.
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Old 03-11-2014, 05:55 AM   #22
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I feel like a lot of threads on this board get ruined by butthurt and over-reacting.

Last edited by Esther; 03-11-2014 at 06:02 AM.
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Old 03-11-2014, 06:01 AM   #23
Esther
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Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Esther has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
Well read what I put above and you will find out. You started this thread by publicly criticizing the clothing choices of the people who are brave enough to post pictures on this forum without their permission or asking you to do it and you did so behind their back on another thread. How would you like it if I looked at pictures you posted on this forum and then started a thread called 'FFA fashion disasters', described your outfit and said how horrible I thought it was? Huge lack of respect here. The BHM on this forum are human beings not your personal wank fodder.
The OP did not say anything like this.
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Old 03-11-2014, 06:01 AM   #24
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terpsichore does more than just post hot picsterpsichore does more than just post hot picsterpsichore does more than just post hot pics
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Originally Posted by tankyguy View Post
This illustrates the tricky nature of fashion do's and don'ts.
There's probably an equal number of women who hate untucked shirts. You try to cater to some, you lose others.
exactly. except you don't really lose anyone, because i don't think clothing choices are a deal-breaker for most people. i find that fashion pet peeves become quirkily charming when someone i like is wearing them.

(someone asked 'what about FFA fashion disasters?' that's easy. ugg boots. apparently. every guy i know thinks they're hideous; i think they're adorable!)
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Old 03-11-2014, 06:32 AM   #25
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On the BHM board, you can say whatever you want, out yourself as a heathen, serial-killer, alien-zombie ... whatever .... you'll find tolerance.

If you're intent on being tarred-&-feathered though, go ahead and start a critical debate about .... fashion....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Amaranthine View Post
I find it really funny that you instead posted a description where someone could discern exactly which pictures you're talking about
The problem with all shock images, they're imprinted on your retina and take a while longer to go away......

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Originally Posted by biglynch View Post
Hows about I wear what ever I want and thats the end of it.
That's actually totally fine because you in essence know how to do it.

You've posted some great fashion pics of yourself, like playing on the English country squire theme or that of the art mobster, which brought out the best in your phenotype and conveyed a distinct, interesting and flattering sense of personal style.

Only lately I'm worried .... have you caught that nasty virus that makes men lose their style sense...?

Quote:
Originally Posted by terpsichore View Post
i don't want to tear down anyone; that is not the intent of this thread. imho the whole point of fashion is that it's a fun way to express yourself, and i think it's interesting what different people like and/or dislike as far as style.
if you think that asking people about their fashion pet peeves is too negative, then nevermind that and let's just focus on the positives and on what you DO like.
This is the point.
It's not about conforming to polka dots this season, stripes next year and wearing what's in every fashion magazine.
It's about finding a way to express through dress as who you want to be perceived in the social context.

Fashion or better dress is an established social code, a non-verbal form of sending signals - just like language is a verbal one. Denying the importance of dress or not using it doesn't make the code go away - it just shows you don't/refuse to speak it.
Dress/appearance even are social codes that are based in biology - to convey background, power, status, mating chances. Like the most colorful male bird get's the female with the thickest breast feathers....

Rejecting the code doesn't make anybody a better, morally superior person - just as using the code doesn't per se turn someone into a superficial twat.

Women from early on are conditioned much more strongly to accept, use - and sometimes abuse - the social code of dress. For men it is less so, and BHM especially seem to have received the message the code doesn't apply to them. That's wrong though, because the dress of many BHM may not be sending the code signals they really want the others to receive about them.

As with every code, like in a language, there are conventions as to meaning and interpretation.
If you appear at a function as a BHM in baggy pants and non-matching wrinkled t-shirt, the message 98% of all people will receive is not: 'Oh a BHM with a beautiful mind and a shining soul, both too precious to waste time and thought on dress.'
The 98% will interpret it more in the line of: 'Ehh, a fat guy who didn't make the effort ..." - often (unjustifiably) extending this perception to the person as such. Codes in social interaction have the function of simplifying, making it easier to immediately assess and categorize situations. (Our stone age heritage, to be able to instantly figure out whether that furry thing behind the next rock is a rabbit or a sabre-tooth tiger....)

Scorning social conventions on code interpretation doesn't make them go away. Like if an English speaker says: 'Me go in room with bed now to eyes close' nobody will assume this person is the next Shakespeare in the making.

So finding a personal sense of dress to become the master of the coded messages he conveys, how he wants his environment to receive them is imo in a BHM's basic self-interest.

There's a whole thread on another board with BHMs moaning they don't get positive attention from BBWs when they attend events in jeans & t-shirts.
That says more about the jeans&t-shirts than the BBWs!



Quote:
Originally Posted by Paquito View Post
So I have no problem talking about fashion and fashion disasters and such, but I'm kind of conflicted when it comes to judging fat fashion because of problems with access. Finding clothes when you're fat is difficult enough, but finding fashionable clothes when fat? Good luck. Personally, I would love to overhaul my wardrobe and fill it with some of the trendy, affordable wear that smaller guys can get. But my personal style is informed more by what I can fit in and afford than my tastes in clothing. So could a hypothetical fat guy be wearing a shirt that's two sizes too big on purpose? Sure. But I think it's just as likely that he's just throwing on whatever he can find that fits, no matter how poor that fit is.

Plus, taste is very subjective. I try not to force my own style on others. Even if the idea of wearing a suit makes me itch.
Yes, apart from the not learning early part BHMs are thrown a much worse deal than BBWs are by now as far as availability and pricing for clothing goes.

It asks for a lot more dedication, patience, overcoming frustration and unfortunately also money.
Being creative - like for instance asking to be consider as a model in a local tailoring/textile design school, etc. - becomes a necessity.

As far as taste and style goes, there's a huge range of options which will work for the BHM in his individual setting. It's about finding something that fits, makes the best of the individual shape, high lights skin, eyes, hair, makes you feel your best when facing the world.

It's also not about imposing personal preferences on anyone - different things work for different people.
A SS/BHM friend of mine for instance has no backside, very thin legs and a wonderfully blubbery upper torso & belly. His style is one I normally, theoretically don't care for at all: He always wears really skinny pants with boots, a dark sports coat to make the shoulders look broad and camouflage the missing backside and great shirts in all shades of blue (to match his great eyes) in dainty, eclectic patterns, actually emphasizing the belly.
But he looks totally cool like this and has a great presence.

It just makes me sad and frustrates me if I see many BHMs IRL and here on the board whom I know to be intelligent, interesting, funny, creative people - but who are simply cutting themselves short by conveying the opposite visual message.
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