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Old 02-04-2016, 12:15 PM   #126
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Originally Posted by Xyantha Reborn View Post
i could see the girl pooping next to me in the floor.
Omg, why didn't she use the toilet!!!!
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Old 02-04-2016, 12:21 PM   #127
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Reflection in the floor! not pooping ON the floor! How does one even poop IN a floor?!
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Old 02-04-2016, 12:42 PM   #128
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omg she can see meeeee!
Assert dominance by maintaining eye contact for the entire duration.
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Old 02-04-2016, 12:46 PM   #129
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Haha! Does duration of event play into consideration, then? And is it how fast, or how long?
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Old 02-04-2016, 06:26 PM   #130
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Floors in the bathroom at work are so shiney i could see the girl pooping next to me in the floor.


Wasnt until i got out of the bathroom i was like omg she can see meeeee!
Oh gosh. Years back I was running the Rock and Roll Marathon in San Diego. Long about mile 9 I ducked into a parking lot on the edge of downtown where there was some landscaping. Marathon routes usually have those little blue outhouses, but the line was long and people were just peeing in the bushes. I found a corner of the parking lot and did the same. Just as I dropped my shorts a girl ran up next to me, dropped her shorts and squatted down. I looked at her and thought, "Fair enough, if the men are doing it I suppose a woman should be able to as well." I did think it was odd she didn't go somewhere more secluded and instead chose to do her business so close to me. She was literally right next to me. I tried to pretend she wasn't there as I did my thing. Then I heard it. Then I smelt it. Impulsively I looked down and then I saw it coming out of her. Yup, she squatted down right next to me and dropped a deuce! I finished up and was on my was as quickly as I could be. I wonder what she used to wipe?
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Old 02-04-2016, 08:02 PM   #131
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I wonder what she used to wipe?
Probably just as well you didn't find out. It might also have answered your question about why she squatted next to you.
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Old 02-04-2016, 08:40 PM   #132
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Probably just as well you didn't find out. It might also have answered your question about why she squatted next to you.
Now there's an unpleasant thought.
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Old 02-06-2016, 12:23 AM   #133
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I was in the bathroom and almost slipped. I ran out to my friend and said "Dude, I was just in the bathroom and almost ate shit!" The guy standing next to us looked mortified.

My choice of words could have been better.
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Old 02-06-2016, 10:03 PM   #134
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I was just in the bathroom and almost ate shit!
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Old 02-10-2016, 08:39 AM   #135
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Not technically me, but I'm sure my mom had this moment, and I wanted to facepalm.

I am barely awake, get a text from her which wakes me up, "can you unlock the door, I am stuck outside in the freezing cold and Kenzie (my niece) is on her way"...

I get up, go look at the door. Totally unlocked. Not locked at all. I open the door: "It's not locked"...

Proceed to go back to bed, lol.
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Old 02-13-2016, 08:27 PM   #136
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Not technically me, but I'm sure my mom had this moment, and I wanted to facepalm.

I am barely awake, get a text from her which wakes me up, "can you unlock the door, I am stuck outside in the freezing cold and Kenzie (my niece) is on her way"...

I get up, go look at the door. Totally unlocked. Not locked at all. I open the door: "It's not locked"...

Proceed to go back to bed, lol.

This is like my life. Except i am your mom. Lol
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Old 03-16-2016, 08:45 AM   #137
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I was incapable of ordering my own coffee and breakfast this AM.

I needed to restort to a mixture of vague hand signals and a reliance on them knowing my order.
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Old 03-16-2016, 08:49 AM   #138
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I was incapable of ordering my own coffee and breakfast this AM.

I needed to restort to a mixture of vague hand signals and a reliance on them knowing my order.
You unable to speak? And I missed it! Sounds so wonderful.
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Old 03-17-2016, 05:29 PM   #139
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At work, I was sent a corrected version of a photo of a product, and somehow managed to repost the old photo into the layout I was working on, without noticing.
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Old 03-24-2016, 02:33 PM   #140
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Today I attempted a 405 pound deadlift. That's 1 bar that weighs 45 pounds and 4 plates, each at 45 pounds. At my size (170 pounds) this is at the moment the very brink of my abilities and takes some serious mental preparation and everything going right. And it didn't...

Instead of a 4th 45 pound plate I put a 35 and a 10 because they were easier to load. But I forgot to load the 10 on each side and the weight wasn't balanced. I feel the extra 10 pounds I was missing wouldn't have made the difference on the lift but the unbalanced load certainly did. I got off the floor but could t reach lockout, one side heavier than the other. I had to abandon the attempt and due to the mental prep needed will have to try again another time.
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Old 03-25-2016, 09:20 AM   #141
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Today I attempted a 405 pound deadlift. That's 1 bar that weighs 45 pounds and 4 plates, each at 45 pounds. At my size (170 pounds) this is at the moment the very brink of my abilities and takes some serious mental preparation and everything going right. And it didn't...

Instead of a 4th 45 pound plate I put a 35 and a 10 because they were easier to load. But I forgot to load the 10 on each side and the weight wasn't balanced. I feel the extra 10 pounds I was missing wouldn't have made the difference on the lift but the unbalanced load certainly did. I got off the floor but could t reach lockout, one side heavier than the other. I had to abandon the attempt and due to the mental prep needed will have to try again another time.
Look, let me say straight away, we can probably never be friends if you use 35 lb. plates.

But, good job on the attempt! But seriously, next time put 4 wheels on there the way God intended. Plus it makes the balance better for your pull. That's solid work at a body weight of 170. Good luck.
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Old 03-25-2016, 10:41 AM   #142
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Look, let me say straight away, we can probably never be friends if you use 35 lb. plates.

But, good job on the attempt! But seriously, next time put 4 wheels on there the way God intended. Plus it makes the balance better for your pull. That's solid work at a body weight of 170. Good luck.
I'm with you on the plates! It was pure laziness on my part that I loaded it the way I did. It would have been easy enough to get a 2.5 pound weight and roll the plates onto it, propping it up and making it easy to load a 45 pounder. Instead I was lazy and messed up the attempt as a result. Lesson learned! And you're right about the balance too. Normally I do that. Like on a bench press if I go from 205 to 225, I remove the 35 and put on a 45 instead of adding 10s. It's a mental thing more than anything but it's a nuance I've developed over time. Should have trusted my instincts yesterday but I'll get that lift in due time.
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Old 03-29-2016, 05:54 AM   #143
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This may be an ongoing one all day. Due to one thing and another, all my usual work trousers are waiting to be washed or in my ironing pile, so this morning I had to grab an older pair. A pair that I knew still fit OK-ish, showing some pull at the pockets and not sitting quite right but nothing major.

At least, that was the case the last time I wore these, probably a few months back. Get to work, sit down, and for whatever reason these are now really pulling along the centre seam in the seat, which means they are somewhat crunching my junk I knew I should have asked for one of those standing desks!
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Old 03-29-2016, 12:31 PM   #144
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This may be an ongoing one all day. Due to one thing and another, all my usual work trousers are waiting to be washed or in my ironing pile, so this morning I had to grab an older pair. A pair that I knew still fit OK-ish, showing some pull at the pockets and not sitting quite right but nothing major.

At least, that was the case the last time I wore these, probably a few months back. Get to work, sit down, and for whatever reason these are now really pulling along the centre seam in the seat, which means they are somewhat crunching my junk I knew I should have asked for one of those standing desks!
2 for 2.
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Old 03-29-2016, 01:08 PM   #145
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Hey, Tad, if you drop your car keys while still at the office don't drop down too fast to pick them up! The ass seem on a pair of trousers can be dangerously fragile and susceptible to untimely ripping! I did that once in a pair of dress slacks and I'm not even a BHM! Thankfully it was at home. My wife felt so bad but I couldn't help but laugh at myself. Then when I took it to the seem repair place the lady right away knew what happened. I'm pretty sure she was being funny when she said, "you want me to take it out an inch too?"
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Old 03-29-2016, 01:47 PM   #146
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Walked into a meeting at work this morning, sat, pulled out my portfolio to take notes, then realized I wasn't supposed to be there.
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Old 03-30-2016, 10:22 PM   #147
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I may or may not have set fire to a mug in my flat at midnight.

Smoke inhalation is a bitch.
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Old 03-31-2016, 04:14 AM   #148
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haha rojodi! Been there, done that.

Loops...I have to ask...HOW!?
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Old 03-31-2016, 04:34 AM   #149
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Xyantha Reborn View Post
Loops...I have to ask...HOW!?
Um... well, I found a recipe for a mug cake and I put it in the microwave and, um, the contents of the cup caught fire apparently when my back was turned. This melted the inside of the ceramic mug (!) and sent plumes of acrid smoke billowing out all through my flat and set off all the alarms. At 2am. In a block of flats.

I did manage to make sure my guinea pigs didn't get smoked out, then effectively shut myself in the room with the microwave the try and get the smoke out... long story short, I have smoke damage to my eyes, nose and lungs but I'm okay and the guinea pigs are absolutely fine.
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Old 03-31-2016, 06:05 AM   #150
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Loopy, I think you won 'Derp of the week'

I hope the smoke damage (and smoke smell in stuff) is not TOO bad.

And I hope you can replace the microwave.
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