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Old 08-07-2016, 06:20 AM   #1
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Default Can you pick up women at a Chinese buffet?

I need some advice. There's a Chinese buffet west of my city that I go to pretty infrequently. However, I've noticed that whenever I've been there I've been in a group of guys that aren't FA like I am. Without fail, I've seen a couple of bbw/ssbbw there that I would have tried to talk to if I had the chance. I can't leave the group so I just had to check them out from where I sat. Can I go to the buffet alone and maybe try to meet a woman there or do I at least need a wing man?
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Old 08-07-2016, 08:06 AM   #2
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You don't need a wingman to pick up a woman at a Chinese buffet. I would, however, recommend some REALLY big chopsticks.

Seriously, most restaurants are NOT good places to meet someone. A restaurant is based on the principle of eat-up-and-get-the-hell-out (which the restaurateurs call 'throughput'). You'll have a better chance to meet a woman somewhere where loitering is encouraged (a park, a party, a library, etc.).
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Old 08-07-2016, 08:09 AM   #3
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Originally Posted by biggirlluvher View Post
o I at least need a wing man?
Nah, no need to bring your own. Most Chinese buffets have wings man.
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Old 08-07-2016, 08:30 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by Dr. Feelgood View Post

Seriously, most restaurants are NOT good places to meet someone. A restaurant is based on the principle of eat-up-and-get-the-hell-out (which the restaurateurs call 'throughput').

This is definitely a North American aberration to not say perversion - and a reason I don't care for going out to eat in the US much.

That you more or less instantly get your check as soon as you've put down your fork is the antithesis of true eating culture. Meaning that eating is not only the fulfillment of a basic need and the ingestion of calories, but a culinary and social event.

In Europe it is totally accepted to lean back, contemplate and watch the other diners. Actually in many traditional restaurants you might even get worried questions whether everything is okay with food and atmosphere if you run right out after finishing. Because it might mean something was wrong with your eating experience that you did not want to prolong it.
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Old 08-07-2016, 09:20 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by agouderia View Post
In Europe it is totally accepted to lean back, contemplate and watch the other diners. Actually in many traditional restaurants you might even get worried questions whether everything is okay with food and atmosphere if you run right out after finishing. Because it might mean something was wrong with your eating experience that you did not want to prolong it.
So true! So I would advise you to try.
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Old 08-07-2016, 10:08 AM   #6
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I've noticed quite a few cuties at the buffet too. I've never tried this at a buffet but have thought the thing to do is wait till the prospect goes back for another plate, go back yourself, and "accidentally" end up right next to her and see if there's a chance to say something. This technique has worked in bars and clubs (i.e. wait till the prospect goes to get a drink and decide now is a good time to wait in line for a drink too).
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Old 08-07-2016, 11:52 AM   #7
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I know I'm just one woman and don't talk for all of us, but I'd find it deeply off putting to be chatted up at a buffet. Tends to be the place people go when they either don't want to talk to anyone, or want to talk to/hang out with the friends/family/partner they came with. I mean, you wouldn't just walk up to a person in a restaurant and start chatting them up, right? Same kinda principle, at least to me. I'd say leave people alone when they are trying to eat/get food.
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Old 08-07-2016, 04:19 PM   #8
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You never know until you try...
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Old 08-07-2016, 04:22 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by loopytheone View Post
I know I'm just one woman and don't talk for all of us, but I'd find it deeply off putting to be chatted up at a buffet. Tends to be the place people go when they either don't want to talk to anyone, or want to talk to/hang out with the friends/family/partner they came with. I mean, you wouldn't just walk up to a person in a restaurant and start chatting them up, right? Same kinda principle, at least to me. I'd say leave people alone when they are trying to eat/get food.
Don't forget the old adage:"no guts, no glory." As you acknowledge, what is off putting to one person may be flattering to another. While the chances of success seem remote, I've seen some guys with a little charisma and a lot of courage get a phone number when the rest of us were saying "no way". In a full service restaurant it would be really hard, but at a buffet i suppose you could start a conversation while getting your food. It wouldn't be easy, but if there was some immediate chemistry it might be possible. I can say with complete confidence however, that I wouldn't have the stones to try it.
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Old 08-08-2016, 05:39 AM   #10
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Are we talking staff or patrons?
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Old 08-09-2016, 12:05 PM   #11
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Probably going to require skill here. Most people at the buffet are focused on the food, if you are thinking of chatting up a BBW fill her plate. Is a wingman required, in this situation probably not. But I would think the difficulty would be a little higher here than other situations.

Most people at buffets try to get their monies worth. This would probably be a place where you would see more overweight people than normal.
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Old 08-09-2016, 06:03 PM   #12
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Probably going to require skill here. Most people at the buffet are focused on the food, if you are thinking of chatting up a BBW fill her plate. Is a wingman required, in this situation probably not. But I would think the difficulty would be a little higher here than other situations.

Most people at buffets try to get their monies worth. This would probably be a place where you would see more overweight people than normal.

I'm thinking this is a moderate difficulty situation. Less difficult than on the sidewalk or at the mall but more difficult than at a bar or club where people are expecting advance and are likely more receptive. However, there is something about food that puts people in a social mood.
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Old 08-10-2016, 06:44 AM   #13
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I'm thinking this is a moderate difficulty situation. Less difficult than on the sidewalk or at the mall but more difficult than at a bar or club where people are expecting advance and are likely more receptive. However, there is something about food that puts people in a social mood.
Might just come down to personal preference, flirting style, or planning of what to say. I have a distaste for bar/club culture, which I have posted about before. But really when it comes down to it, if I see a girl who is a perfect ten on looks, location doesn't matter much.
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Old 08-10-2016, 06:50 AM   #14
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It might work if the place is fairly crowded and she is alone at a table. You wander by, plate in hand, obviously looking for somewhere to sit. Then you say, "Excuse me, but would it be all right if I sit here?" This, incidentally, was how I met my ex-wife.
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Old 08-11-2016, 06:00 AM   #15
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From the girl perspective; it could make the woman feel intensely uncomfortable and trapped.

I think that a woman will either; know you are flirting and dislike it, know you are flirting and welcome it, or not know you are flirting. If she feels uncomfortable you've ruined her lunch and maybe even made her leave. If she is a big girl, she might immediately hate you for "mocking" her. You would have to have a very light hand in my opinion, to make yourself appear friendly without threatening.

Many girls (me included) don't ever date randoms. If you hadn't been pre vetted or at least have a loose aquaintance with another friend you would bat out with me. For example my now hubby and i met at a friend's gaming club. If he had asked me out in the grocery store or a buffet he would have struck out.

So, yes, it is possible. You would have to be sauve, sensitive.
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Old 08-11-2016, 06:11 AM   #16
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Also, depends on culture and location. Just thinking of what Doc mentioned. Generally where I am, sharing a table is weird/uncomfortable/borderline inappropriate. If someone asked to share a table, the person would probably look at other available tables like "wtf your legs broken?" Or say yes but hurry through their meal to vacate the uncomfortable situation. But in many cultures/places sharing a table at a meal is normal.

That ettiquite varies based on venue; bar or club is different. Even the library or something would be a different vibe.
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Old 08-11-2016, 06:46 AM   #17
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I can't help noticing that it is the women here that generally think no, getting hit on in a buffet would make them uncomfortable, whereas the guys seem convinced that it wont despite us saying that. *shrugs*

I'm not saying that it is impossible to meet someone that way, I'm sure it's not, but certainly where I'm from most women would have the same reaction as me and Xy. I'd be really creeped out if somebody tried to sit with me at a restaurant. It's awkward enough having to share a table with someone when the place is packed full, but if there were empty seats available? I'd feel like I'd just met my next stalker, which probably isn't the vibe most of you guys are going for.
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Old 08-11-2016, 08:10 AM   #18
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In fairness, this thread is a very small sample size. "You miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take." Wayne Gretzky
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Old 08-12-2016, 11:15 AM   #19
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As a confident BBW, I do not mind being approached anywhere. However, I do mind the content of your message and whether or not you're aethestically pleasing - I need a soft smile and a calm demeanor from a man to catch my attention Plus, if you have salt and pepper hair ... Oooooo wee
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Old 08-12-2016, 03:39 PM   #20
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The same way you pick them up anywhere: Lift with your knees, not your back.
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Old 08-12-2016, 06:19 PM   #21
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Old 08-13-2016, 12:54 AM   #22
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Serious answer:

Assuming reasonable conversational skill (and the ability to come across as "not desperate for a date" and "not creepy"), it ought to be fairly easy to strike up a casual conversation in the buffet line. Ask her opinion of the food item she's currently taking or contemplating, and perhaps suggest items that you like. Ask her for recommendations, too. Discuss how the line is moving (is it slow? moving quickly?) or how crowded (or not) the restaurant is. For the love of G_d, do NOT insist that she didn't take enough food! LOL

Might not get you a seat at her table or vice versa the first time, but it's a good place to start.
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Old 08-13-2016, 06:22 PM   #23
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What not to do ..A few years back in December, in a mall full of people, I was standing at Auntie Anne's Pretzel waiting for my order and a short and very petite gentleman with a very strong accent got on his knees and asked me to marry him. I had never meet or seen this gentleman before. Some people started to notice and started to clap, I wanted to die. I closed my eyes and all I could say was, Sir please standup. I started to walk back to the store where I was working and the guy followed me into the store. A coworker came up to me and asked if the guy behind me needed any help. The guy then said: I just need her answer. I turned around and said Sir, I don't know you, I can't marry you. He went on to say that he was Italian, that he came to America two years ago and that he had his own company and now wanted to get married. I kept saying …. Sorry, I can't marry you. My coworker nicknamed him "Vinchenzo".

"Vinchenzo" continued to walk by the store on Friday evenings for a long time.

Back then, BBW community in Pittsburgh was a small group of people and I few years later my coworker saw "Vinchenzo" and his new bride at one of the dances.

Maybe this is the reason that I am attracted to tall, big guys.
After this I dated someone that was 6'6" and big!
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Old 08-13-2016, 07:52 PM   #24
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Go for it.
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Old 08-29-2016, 04:16 PM   #25
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fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!fuelingfire has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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To the original poster: What did you decide? Are you going to try it/have you?
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