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Old 08-08-2017, 11:59 AM   #26
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Originally Posted by DragonFly View Post
I'm going to chime in here.... if you are asking for one thing that has to be there to be considered. It is kind of like you having to be a certain height to ride a ride. In a world of billions of people I guess you could say that the one criteria that you would have to have is alive (dead is pretty creepy but I'm not judging anyone's kink). I think saying fat is an acceptable must have. My guy totally ignored any female that was not heavy. Most heavy women recieved at least a glance. He just couldn't not. I was not insecure about it at all. I knew that is what he liked.
Thanks for the support!
Such contributions are encouraging for unconfident FAs.
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Old 08-08-2017, 12:17 PM   #27
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Originally Posted by BigElectricKat View Post
No I get it. I have a bad habit of taking offense to certain things and not really expressing myself in a clearly. I want to go on record as apologizing to Blockieier. Didn't mean to offend at all. I used to be attracted only to redheads.But I met a really nice gal who wasn't and we had a great relationship for a while. I stopped making that a prerequisite after that.. ...
There isn't an apology needed. This is a forum for FA/BBW and we discuss about physical characteristics sometimes. If it'd be a forum for hairstyling and -colour we'd talk about those stuff.
Anyway, controversial post are mostly enlightening.
Thanks for your posts.
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Old 08-10-2017, 11:41 AM   #28
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So, any fat woman will do? That is the only thing that will be special about her? That's odd to me (but what do I know, right?). Being fat doesn't make a person special. Neither does being blonde, tall, black, fit, flat chested, having a nice car, having two ears, or having a big butt make you special. *Ummm... maybe the butt thing is sorta special, especially if it has some nice shape and motion when she walks! but I digress*

I only ask this because, how is your woman supposed to feel happy, safe, special, and secure if all you care about is that a woman is fat? So,the next fat gal that comes walking/riding down the street, you'll dump your current and go after a new one? I'm just asking.
To simplify somewhat, I think we tend to have two sorts of criteria: requirements and attractors. Requirements are sort of a go-no-go type thing, while attractors are more of a ‘how many points do you get for this’ type of thing.

To make a simplistic analogy, I remember a co-worker, whose third child was on the way, discovering that he could no-way, no-how, fit three child seats into the back of his current car, so he had to go shopping for a new ride. “Can fit three child seats” was a requirement, he wasn’t even going to spend time looking at anything that didn’t look likely to meet that criteria. From the class of vehicles that passed that test, he had preferences around size, fuel economy, expected reliability, safety, price, and technological features (he isn’t one who cared that much about speed or handling, but he’s a gadget nut). Although he probably didn’t do a formal pointing exercise (although he is an engineer, so he might have …), at the very least informally you could imagine a vehicle getting a certain number of points for having great fuel economy, (perhaps some extra ones if it was a hybrid – a technological feature), some for being rated as particularly safe and likewise reliable, maybe a few for separate rear-seat climate controls, and so on.

So what was most important to him? You could say “can hold three child seats” because that was the strongest cut off factor, but then you might ask “What, you don’t care if is a gas-guzzling piece of junk, so long as it is big enough for that?” but that clearly was not the case. Or you could try to figure out which aspect was winning cars the most (informal) points with him, and say that that was the most important – but again that could be attacked by simplifying and reductio ad absurdum (“well then why don’t you get a motorcycle if fuel economy is the most important thing to you?”

I think it can be somewhat similar with people. There are things that just rule out some people, for some people. They won’t get involved with, or will only get involved with, ________ (fill in the blank, i.e. a particular gender, smokers, divorced people, virgins, single parents, sports fans, people outside their culture, etc). Within those bounds they may still have strong preferences (they love a foreign accent, prefer a tall partner, get a little excited by a big paycheque, tend to like certain hair or skin tones, shared kinks, totally give bonus points for wordplay, etc), but those are more ‘here are good things to have, but I won’t rule you out for not having them’.

Some FA have fat as a requirement. Some don’t have it as a requirement but do give ‘points’ for fatness amongst those that meet their other requirements. Both are totally reasonable ways to approach things, although as always some self-examination to consider such things tends to be helpful.
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Old 08-10-2017, 12:46 PM   #29
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To simplify somewhat, I think we tend to have two sorts of criteria: requirements and attractors. Requirements are sort of a go-no-go type thing, while attractors are more of a ‘how many points do you get for this’ type of thing.

To make a simplistic analogy, I remember a co-worker, whose third child was on the way, discovering that he could no-way, no-how, fit three child seats into the back of his current car, so he had to go shopping for a new ride. “Can fit three child seats” was a requirement, he wasn’t even going to spend time looking at anything that didn’t look likely to meet that criteria. From the class of vehicles that passed that test, he had preferences around size, fuel economy, expected reliability, safety, price, and technological features (he isn’t one who cared that much about speed or handling, but he’s a gadget nut). Although he probably didn’t do a formal pointing exercise (although he is an engineer, so he might have …), at the very least informally you could imagine a vehicle getting a certain number of points for having great fuel economy, (perhaps some extra ones if it was a hybrid – a technological feature), some for being rated as particularly safe and likewise reliable, maybe a few for separate rear-seat climate controls, and so on.

So what was most important to him? You could say “can hold three child seats” because that was the strongest cut off factor, but then you might ask “What, you don’t care if is a gas-guzzling piece of junk, so long as it is big enough for that?” but that clearly was not the case. Or you could try to figure out which aspect was winning cars the most (informal) points with him, and say that that was the most important – but again that could be attacked by simplifying and reductio ad absurdum (“well then why don’t you get a motorcycle if fuel economy is the most important thing to you?”

I think it can be somewhat similar with people. There are things that just rule out some people, for some people. They won’t get involved with, or will only get involved with, ________ (fill in the blank, i.e. a particular gender, smokers, divorced people, virgins, single parents, sports fans, people outside their culture, etc). Within those bounds they may still have strong preferences (they love a foreign accent, prefer a tall partner, get a little excited by a big paycheque, tend to like certain hair or skin tones, shared kinks, totally give bonus points for wordplay, etc), but those are more ‘here are good things to have, but I won’t rule you out for not having them’.

Some FA have fat as a requirement. Some don’t have it as a requirement but do give ‘points’ for fatness amongst those that meet their other requirements. Both are totally reasonable ways to approach things, although as always some self-examination to consider such things tends to be helpful.
This is probably the most insightful and concise post on this subject thread! It totally sums up AND puts into context what I was trying, rather clumsily, to get at.

To be fair, I did apologize to Block for get all testy about the subject.

You make a valid point though. I remember dating a big girl and some of my friends and acquaintances couldn't believe that I was. I told them look, she checks all the blocks that are important to me (and then some). So, that car features analogy works! Thanks for the input.
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