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Old 11-24-2017, 03:00 PM   #1
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Default Natural Fatties vs Thin to Fat Conversion

Theres a Fetlife group devoted to the process of thin ppl putting on weight and becoming BBW/BHM, seems that whole transformation is a big turn on for many. Which I get but personally I'm most attracted to ppl who are "naturally fat". Like, tell me you just can't seem to stop eating and gaining weight no matter what you do, that you've been overweight all your life and have fat genes from your rotund relatives,
and I get all excited. Not to say you can't be a sort of hybrid fatso, I became overweight by accident but I pushed myself over the line into obesity semi-intentionally.
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Old 11-24-2017, 04:12 PM   #2
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FWIW, unforced weight gain is a huge turn-on for me personally. But the specific aspect of going "from thin to fat" is not all that interesting. For me, there is something fascinating about the "naturally fat" person - the whole mindset is sexy - and I guess I prefer someone going from "already chubby" to "very fat."
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Old 11-24-2017, 05:51 PM   #3
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Interesting subject.
I have always been attracted to fat guys /girls as far as dating goes.
I guess I love natural fatties too but there is a sexy thing for me about girls that gain a lot of weight I just find them so beautiful at a larger size.
I have had people assume I have always been fat because I am obese now.
Had one girl ask me if ever wished I was skinny and I said heck no I have been skinny and its awful.
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Old 11-24-2017, 05:57 PM   #4
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@Tracii: What did you think was awful about being thin?
For me, I've not been truly thin since early childhood but trying to imagine myself that way I think I'd miss the sensuality of seeing and feeling my softness at roundness. And for me to be thin I'd have to starve myself which of course is totally miserable, but I guess that's not an issue if you're naturally thin.
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Old 11-24-2017, 06:08 PM   #5
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I think I equate being thin to a time in my life that was pretty rough.
In drug/alcohol rehab I was 100 pounds or so and sick all the time.
If I ate it just came back up, once I got "clean" I did manage to get around 115 and was still skinny.
Marriage on the rocks affected me too and I didn't eat much because I felt so bad.
Like I said I relate un happiness to being skinny and good times with being fat or gaining weight.

Thanks so much for asking that question it helped me to type that out into words.
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Old 11-24-2017, 07:32 PM   #6
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Still fighting with the metabolism of a humming bird. But it is sure fun trying.
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Old 11-24-2017, 07:33 PM   #7
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tracii View Post
I think I equate being thin to a time in my life that was pretty rough.
In drug/alcohol rehab I was 100 pounds or so and sick all the time.
If I ate it just came back up, once I got "clean" I did manage to get around 115 and was still skinny.
Marriage on the rocks affected me too and I didn't eat much because I felt so bad.
Like I said I relate un happiness to being skinny and good times with being fat or gaining weight.

Thanks so much for asking that question it helped me to type that out into words.
I am just glad that you are happy now
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Old 11-24-2017, 07:55 PM   #8
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Me too Kristal.
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Old 11-25-2017, 12:57 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by Kristal View Post
Still fighting with the metabolism of a humming bird. But it is sure fun trying.
I have the metabolism of a sedated sloth combined with the appetite of a pregnant pachyderm. So yeah fat comes pretty naturally to me lol.
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Old 11-25-2017, 06:36 AM   #10
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Personally I don’t feel much of a difference. Other than attitude towards their size, which varies from person to person. I like to tell myself, the thin person just realized being fat is just so much better. But that’s in my mind.
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Old 11-25-2017, 06:43 AM   #11
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Originally Posted by Tracii View Post
Had one girl ask me if ever wished I was skinny and I said heck no I have been skinny and its awful.
That is an instant FA head turning comment!
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Old 11-25-2017, 08:06 AM   #12
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Personally I donít feel mch of a difference. Other than attitude towards their size ....
This is the decisive point. And it is not so much personality specific, as experience driven.

Natural fatties - who also were heavier during childhood and adolescence - in their overwhelming majority have a much harder time accepting and enjoying their size. Because they have to overcome all the negativity, taunting, bruising invasiveness to open bullying they had to face growing up.

The skinny to fat crowd who potentially has to deal with - among adults actually much more civil - criticism later in life, when they have a more stable personality and a higher degree of self-assuredness can naturally be more laid back about the issue.

Or come to the conscious decision that being fat is their thing. Because while growing up the mind pattern that will almost automatically establish itself is more of: "What is wrong with me? Why can't I be thin and pretty like everyone else?"
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Old 11-25-2017, 01:22 PM   #13
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I prefer people who are just naturally big. I am actually really into weight gain, but thin people gaining weight does nothing for me whatsoever. I just like naturally big people getting bigger as they come to accept themselves, heh.
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Old 11-26-2017, 03:11 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by squeezablysoft View Post
Theres a Fetlife group devoted to the process of thin ppl putting on weight and becoming BBW/BHM, seems that whole transformation is a big turn on for many.
My feelings about this are complex. Some of my earliest, fondest and most emotional memories of fatness were watching cartoons, and in those cartoons, it's always some naturally-thin person who gets fat, so there's sometimes that element to my fantasies. However, when I'm dealing with an actual person, one who's always been fat, and can't lose weight without tremendous effort is enchanting to me. They feel more comforting, I guess, especially if they've made peace with that, and enjoy being fat like I do.

P.S.: Like yourself, I find the soft, round shape and texture to me very pleasant, and in my case, soothing as well, on me and on others.
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Old 11-26-2017, 08:07 AM   #15
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Interesting topic!

I would say that with people who have either been Fat earlier or have the Fat "genetic gene" lets call it there seems to be an aspect of vulnerability which is very sexy to me. I have had a couple of old girlfriends that were heavier as kids and then leaned out before I met them...lets say High School and then started packing on the Lbs. again after. The cute vulnerability I see when they couldn't control their appetite or slow their eating even when they tried was so arousing to me....or even after they gained a bunch of weight made an effort to diet or reduce their eating and ended up gaining even more weight.....it may have been because they knew I was not only fine with them gaining weight but loved the extra weight they put on.....could be part of the reason their diets didn't work.

On the flip side it is also pretty arousing knowing that a thinner woman is intentionally trying to gain weight and get fatter because they like it.....but it just doesn't have the same impact on me as a vulnerable heavier woman who can't control her appetite and weight. Unless however when the thin woman becomes a lot heavier and now she is vulnerable the same way.
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Old 11-26-2017, 11:58 AM   #16
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@voluptuouslover: You hit the nail on the head, I think. Vulnerability is definitely a big attraction in natural fatties, plus there's an element of losing control that is at the base of a lot of my own personal fetishes.
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Old 11-26-2017, 06:35 PM   #17
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Iím not partial to either. For me what I find appealing is the size and shape combination. I do like size, but the basic shape is easily more important to me. My wife is a thicker framed woman and a few years ago she dropped from ~330 to just under 210. Her big butt was smaller overall but bigger relative to her waist because she lost more weight from her waist and belly than her butt. That was amazing. Now itís all back and then some. She is now over 400 pounds but as she gained it all back she did so with her new proportions. Imagine my excitement: a 400+ pound wife (who tells ME to slim down to 160 from 170!) whoís butt is quite large relative to her waist but also has really big boobs resting on a large, soft, epic belly!

I do think a thicker framed woman like her is more predisposed to weight gain than a more naturally thin woman. And in her case the weight distribution as she gains just seems to naturally go to all the right places. Thatís what having the right shape does for a person!
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Old 11-27-2017, 06:56 AM   #18
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I would say that my preference runs towards people who like their fat bodies, with little regard to how they got there. As mentioned above many people who grew up fat picked up a lot of negative experiences associated with fatness along the way, but not everyone who grew up fat carries bad fat-related scars later into life. Some thin people who become fat may never feel at home in their newly larger skin, while some may feel they have finally become who they were meant to be, while yet others may be equally happy (or unhappy) fat or thin.

I've been an FA basically all of my life, so when I was a teen of course I was attracted to others my age who were fat, and for whatever reason while I imagined the slightly chubby getting quite fat I almost never imagined the actually thin getting fat. So I may have grown up with some unquestioned assumption that you are born to be fat or something like that. But in more adult years I think I came only to care about where one is now and where they want to be in the future, and less about how they got there.

(then again, I've spent more years in my current relationship than years before it, so all of this has been so theoretical for so long that it is hard to know for sure how I'd feel if I actually had to be dating again -- theory doesn't always hold up to the harsh test of dealing with reality)
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Old 11-27-2017, 12:19 PM   #19
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Originally Posted by squeezablysoft View Post
Theres a Fetlife group devoted to the process of thin ppl putting on weight and becoming BBW/BHM, seems that whole transformation is a big turn on for many. Which I get but personally I'm most attracted to ppl who are "naturally fat". Like, tell me you just can't seem to stop eating and gaining weight no matter what you do, that you've been overweight all your life and have fat genes from your rotund relatives,
and I get all excited. Not to say you can't be a sort of hybrid fatso, I became overweight by accident but I pushed myself over the line into obesity semi-intentionally.
I am not 100% sure it is so much that they have gone from thin to fat for me as much as the commitment to the lifestyle that it takes for somebody to knowing gain weight and truly embrace being fat. So many times, there is a self-loathing mentality when it comes to bbws and bhms and to be quite frank, it can be very offputting for an FA that admires those qualities. Especially when you consider that most FA's struggled with admitting what they found attractive to begin with.

2ndly I can't find said group. Maybe link so we have better insight on their views.
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Old 11-27-2017, 12:44 PM   #20
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Interesting topic!

I would say that with people who have either been Fat earlier or have the Fat "genetic gene" lets call it there seems to be an aspect of vulnerability which is very sexy to me.
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So many times, there is a self-loathing mentality when it comes to bbws and bhms and to be quite frank, it can be very offputting for an FA that admires those qualities.
In a nutshell the explanation why many or most BBWs don't like FAs, especially not the born fatties who have had to deal with the issue their entire lives.

Because who would want a partner who gets off on something that causes you a lot of grief? Expecting you to suppress your true feelings and be upbeat about it?
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Old 11-27-2017, 02:00 PM   #21
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It isn't the same thing, but I feel it is probably similar: I look at things like the Kaui Longitunal study which showed most kids with high risk childhoods ended up doing OK in their 30s and 40s even if they had a lot of trouble as kids and adolescents (and how some seemed resilient all along), and think that we have to be careful about projecting attitudes on broad groups of people based on their childhood. There may be trends, especially at younger ages, but allowing for individuality is important too.

ETA: the study I mentioned
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Old 11-27-2017, 05:25 PM   #22
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(then again, I've spent more years in my current relationship than years before it, so all of this has been so theoretical for so long that it is hard to know for sure how I'd feel if I actually had to be dating again -- theory doesn't always hold up to the harsh test of dealing with reality)
This is true. Iíve been with my wife over 12 years now if you go back to when we started dating. She once asked me if I was suddenly thrust back into the dating scene would I pursue plus size women exclusively. While that would certainly be my preference I wouldnít close myself off to being with the right person if that hypothetical opportunity presented itself. Reality and opportunity have a way of laying the best plans to waste. Ideally this thought exercise remains hypothetical!

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In a nutshell the explanation why many or most BBWs don't like FAs, especially not the born fatties who have had to deal with the issue their entire lives.

Because who would want a partner who gets off on something that causes you a lot of grief? Expecting you to suppress your true feelings and be upbeat about it?
This is a huge paradox and there is no one right answer: every person reacts differently. There are those who are annoyed by FAs for the reasons you stated. I definitely encountered them in my dating days. There are also women who are happy to meet guys who not only accept them but embrace and prefer their body types. I know this will sound like Iím bragging and I apologize for that, but Iíve had a few plus size women tell me how envious they are of my wife. She has plus size friends who have told her ďif you ever decide youíre done with him send him my way!Ē Some just want to be accepted for who they are I think he body they have.

I feel like my wife and I have reached a nice balance. She does t necessarily like her body but she loves that I do. Iíve also proven my willingness to change with her if she loses weight so she knows she is free to drop pounds again without fear of me losing interest.
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Old 11-27-2017, 06:34 PM   #23
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oh my... that is a very good topic. i think there is room for everyone and it is just about everyone taste as well. personally... i think that at the end the sexiest thing is a person who is happy with her weight and feels sexy, that is the sexiest... leaving that aside i think living the process of someone thin becoming fat can be really erotic specially if they enjoy it but a naturally fat and happy fat is also very sexy
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Old 11-28-2017, 02:53 AM   #24
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There are also women who are happy to meet guys who not only accept them but embrace and prefer their body types.
We agree on this one. It is only natural for any person to - maybe after some hesitations - appreciate positive attention.

But that is not what I meant or wrote.

It is the element of getting off on and thus exploiting the vulnerability and insecurity caused by a lifetime of weight shaming.

Because deriving pleasure from someone else's suffering is not a positive trait - and a bad foundation for a relationship. Not least because it skewes the balance within the relationship: The partner feasting on the other's weakness will always have the upper hand, hold more power of the vulnerable other and smother the chance of overcoming the weakness.
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Old 11-28-2017, 07:56 AM   #25
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happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!happily_married has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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Originally Posted by agouderia View Post
We agree on this one. It is only natural for any person to - maybe after some hesitations - appreciate positive attention.

But that is not what I meant or wrote.

It is the element of getting off on and thus exploiting the vulnerability and insecurity caused by a lifetime of weight shaming.

Because deriving pleasure from someone else's suffering is not a positive trait - and a bad foundation for a relationship. Not least because it skewes the balance within the relationship: The partner feasting on the other's weakness will always have the upper hand, hold more power of the vulnerable other and smother the chance of overcoming the weakness.
Certainly. I did understand you and raised my point not to disput yours but to highlight how itís a matter of perception. I donít derive pleasure from someone elseís suffering but I do like plus size women. It can be a paradox to say the least but my focus remains on the person. Hence my support for my wife as she lost weight.

Now there are plenty of guys out there who may put the physical first. Guys who also fit your description to the letter. I donít deny theyíre out there and some of them post here in Dims regularly.

With that said, I raise the subject of perception because one plus size woman sees the difference or judges each person individually and another lumps any guy who prefers plus size women in with the FAs you describe.

All this talk makes me thankful Iím married. Itís a minefield out there!
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