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Old 06-06-2008, 07:43 PM   #1151
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I love reading all of your dirty little secrets...keep em coming
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Old 06-07-2008, 07:56 PM   #1152
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I am sooo drooling Misty! Mmmmmm Cheescake and you!

I knew you would be
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Old 06-08-2008, 12:27 AM   #1153
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Here is my confession

I am the kind of person that doesn't think about someone being too skinny or too heavy when I look at them. If I see a girl, I will either be attracted to her or not. I have been attracted to skinny girls, heavy girls, flabby girls, toned girls, etc. However, if I had to choose between two women I am equally attracted to (due to preference), I would much rather be with the heavier set woman than the skinnier woman.

Nevertheless, I am still pressured and frustrated by my family and friends.

With this I mean that my family always tries to push for me to be with a girl who is "socially accepted as beautiful". This means that they would rather see me with a skinny pretty girl (by their standards) with no personality than for me to be with someone who is heavier set but I really like (mind, body and soul).

I come from a society (Chile) which emphasizes the "class" system (still), at least a lot more than the US. As such, you and your family are judged by other families and peers by the money you make, the company you keep (what their last names are or what their lineage is), and the trophy wife/husband you have. It disgusts me, which is why I want to stay in the US after I am done with my MBA (at OSU).

There is this girl, awesome personality, and pretty by everyone's standards. Her and I are good friends, and my family loves her and they want us to be together. But I cannot be with her, because I do not feel attracted to her, and I don't have strong feelings for her. It would be unfair to her if I asked her to be with me out of pressure (and she does want to be with me).

Now, I know some of you will say "forget about what your family thinks and/or how you are judged". Truthfully, I have not, and will not, be dissuaded from my preferences due to the cultural upbringing and/or "acceptable standards". I will always be open and listen to people, but ignorant and/or hypocritical arguments will not be considered.

As for my friends, I have, on several occasions, been uncomfortable due to comments they have made. An example is a girl I was interested a couple of weeks back. She is 5'9 and could not have weighed more than 150 lbs. She is by no means heavy (and doesn't look it either), but right away my friends started calling her the "husky" girl. I am sure she gets that a lot too, because of the type of people our social circles involve. As for my friends, I know that, ultimately, they will support me and whatever choices I make. They just like to make fun, but that does not mean that their comments aren't hurtful to me or to someone else.

All in all, I just have difficulties dealing with such issues, not because of my own personal resolve, but because there are so many insensitive and stubborn people out there. I have made my choices clear in the past, and no one will make me change my own personal tastes. However, there are people that, even with that information at hand, still manage to make rude and hurtful comments.

Thanks for listening (reading actually )
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Old 06-08-2008, 04:58 AM   #1154
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Originally Posted by chileno View Post
Here is my confession

I am the kind of person that doesn't think about someone being too skinny or too heavy when I look at them. If I see a girl, I will either be attracted to her or not. I have been attracted to skinny girls, heavy girls, flabby girls, toned girls, etc. However, if I had to choose between two women I am equally attracted to (due to preference), I would much rather be with the heavier set woman than the skinnier woman.

Nevertheless, I am still pressured and frustrated by my family and friends.

With this I mean that my family always tries to push for me to be with a girl who is "socially accepted as beautiful". This means that they would rather see me with a skinny pretty girl (by their standards) with no personality than for me to be with someone who is heavier set but I really like (mind, body and soul).

I come from a society (Chile) which emphasizes the "class" system (still), at least a lot more than the US. As such, you and your family are judged by other families and peers by the money you make, the company you keep (what their last names are or what their lineage is), and the trophy wife/husband you have. It disgusts me, which is why I want to stay in the US after I am done with my MBA (at OSU).

There is this girl, awesome personality, and pretty by everyone's standards. Her and I are good friends, and my family loves her and they want us to be together. But I cannot be with her, because I do not feel attracted to her, and I don't have strong feelings for her. It would be unfair to her if I asked her to be with me out of pressure (and she does want to be with me).

Now, I know some of you will say "forget about what your family thinks and/or how you are judged". Truthfully, I have not, and will not, be dissuaded from my preferences due to the cultural upbringing and/or "acceptable standards". I will always be open and listen to people, but ignorant and/or hypocritical arguments will not be considered.

As for my friends, I have, on several occasions, been uncomfortable due to comments they have made. An example is a girl I was interested a couple of weeks back. She is 5'9 and could not have weighed more than 150 lbs. She is by no means heavy (and doesn't look it either), but right away my friends started calling her the "husky" girl. I am sure she gets that a lot too, because of the type of people our social circles involve. As for my friends, I know that, ultimately, they will support me and whatever choices I make. They just like to make fun, but that does not mean that their comments aren't hurtful to me or to someone else.

All in all, I just have difficulties dealing with such issues, not because of my own personal resolve, but because there are so many insensitive and stubborn people out there. I have made my choices clear in the past, and no one will make me change my own personal tastes. However, there are people that, even with that information at hand, still manage to make rude and hurtful comments.

Thanks for listening (reading actually )
I am the same way chileno. I can be attracted to any size. The only difference is if I had to choose between two I would be swayed more by the kind of relationship or rapor we have. Not suggesting you wouldn't do the same, just saying I don't gravitate more towards one that another because of a body. Just the way I'm wired.

I will say that friends in general will make fun. If my boyfriend were skinny, fat, a collector of things, a rocket scientist - my friends would find some way to make it funny and raz me about it. It's what they do. It can get annoying sometimes and my friends often do. I generally don't get hyper sensitive about any of it unless they are attacking a handicap or some kind of shortcoming. I think if you allow yourself to embrace your sweetie's size as just an incidental physical characteristic rather than a fault or shortcoming it might make things not so oppressive. Coming from a societal background that is so negative against fat it can be hard to do. Your friends probably don't look at it that way. Could that be possible?
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Old 06-10-2008, 06:06 PM   #1155
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Here ya go, Misty.....take your pick of the litter.....or heck, take'em all!



<don't tell the girls by the cabana....or I'll be fetching cheesecakes for the rest of my life!>
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Old 06-11-2008, 12:10 AM   #1156
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My confession is that I feel like I am inadequate because I am big. I'm sure this has to do with society and the attitude toward big people. I always expect to be let down by a man because of my physique...I expect to be hurt. I expect that someone won't choose me for a project at work because of it. I expect to be constantly hurt because I "dared" to be born big.

It is an everyday struggle that is really hard to overcome. Sometimes it absolutely gets me down and I just can't get out of the funk for awhile. I hide it pretty well...I am very successful in my career, I've found a very special man that accepts me and loves me for who I am, not what I can be...

But still, the constant feelings of inadequacy linger. While vastly improved from 2 years ago, when I began slimming down and building my self-confidence with an extended business trip for my job, it's still a very large and ugly monkey on my back.

I hate how I immediately feel my size is to blame if something goes wrong. He didn't call when he said he would - it must be because I'm fat. I didn't get a job promotion - it's because I am fat.

It's amazing how society's views and ostracizing of a group of people can fuck up a person's brain so much. And there's no group as mean as little children - I have the permanent emotional damage to prove it. No matter how many pounds I lose - I still cannot see myself as beautiful or pretty. Sometimes, no amount of makeup or pretty clothes can help me see past it.

It is an everyday struggle and it is getting easier because I know I am a great woman...but sometimes old doubts and insecurities creep in. I force myself to do things that make me stand up for myself and deal with the insecurities instead of running away from them. I just went to Europe, alone, and I did just fine. I've gone to India for extended trips as well for my job, and it's very hard to be there - land of the skinny, short people - but somehow I got through it. I just wish I could harness that feeling of empowerment when I am feeling inadequate here at home in the USA.

Sorry so long - but it felt good to put it in writing.
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Old 06-11-2008, 01:48 AM   #1157
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Originally Posted by amber83 View Post
My confession is that I feel like I am inadequate because I am big. I'm sure this has to do with society and the attitude toward big people. I always expect to be let down by a man because of my physique...I expect to be hurt. I expect that someone won't choose me for a project at work because of it. I expect to be constantly hurt because I "dared" to be born big.

It is an everyday struggle that is really hard to overcome. Sometimes it absolutely gets me down and I just can't get out of the funk for awhile. I hide it pretty well...I am very successful in my career, I've found a very special man that accepts me and loves me for who I am, not what I can be...

But still, the constant feelings of inadequacy linger. While vastly improved from 2 years ago, when I began slimming down and building my self-confidence with an extended business trip for my job, it's still a very large and ugly monkey on my back.

I hate how I immediately feel my size is to blame if something goes wrong. He didn't call when he said he would - it must be because I'm fat. I didn't get a job promotion - it's because I am fat.

It's amazing how society's views and ostracizing of a group of people can fuck up a person's brain so much. And there's no group as mean as little children - I have the permanent emotional damage to prove it. No matter how many pounds I lose - I still cannot see myself as beautiful or pretty. Sometimes, no amount of makeup or pretty clothes can help me see past it.

It is an everyday struggle and it is getting easier because I know I am a great woman...but sometimes old doubts and insecurities creep in. I force myself to do things that make me stand up for myself and deal with the insecurities instead of running away from them. I just went to Europe, alone, and I did just fine. I've gone to India for extended trips as well for my job, and it's very hard to be there - land of the skinny, short people - but somehow I got through it. I just wish I could harness that feeling of empowerment when I am feeling inadequate here at home in the USA.

Sorry so long - but it felt good to put it in writing.
While you make wonderful points that childhood experiences can be devastating as one grows older.....but I can't overlook the fact you're talking about hating your fat on a forum where fat is accepted.

The people here will take one look at you and go "woah who's the babe" so maybe you need to meet some people like us instead of wanting to fit into society so badly.
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Old 06-11-2008, 08:07 AM   #1158
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While you make wonderful points that childhood experiences can be devastating as one grows older.....but I can't overlook the fact you're talking about hating your fat on a forum where fat is accepted.

The people here will take one look at you and go "woah who's the babe" so maybe you need to meet some people like us instead of wanting to fit into society so badly.
I understand very well that it is accepted here, but it isn't fully accepted in society, and, unfortunately I have to live in said society.

My confession is about my internal struggles that I am working to overcome.
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Old 06-11-2008, 01:11 PM   #1159
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I understand very well that it is accepted here, but it isn't fully accepted in society, and, unfortunately I have to live in said society.

My confession is about my internal struggles that I am working to overcome.
You're absolutely right, it isn't accepted in society, which is a shame.

Look at with the perspective, if people don't like it, somewhere out there people do, like here for instance
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Old 06-11-2008, 02:25 PM   #1160
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Originally Posted by amber83 View Post
My confession is that I feel like I am inadequate because I am big. I'm sure this has to do with society and the attitude toward big people. I always expect to be let down by a man because of my physique...I expect to be hurt. I expect that someone won't choose me for a project at work because of it. I expect to be constantly hurt because I "dared" to be born big.

It is an everyday struggle that is really hard to overcome. Sometimes it absolutely gets me down and I just can't get out of the funk for awhile. I hide it pretty well...I am very successful in my career, I've found a very special man that accepts me and loves me for who I am, not what I can be...

But still, the constant feelings of inadequacy linger. While vastly improved from 2 years ago, when I began slimming down and building my self-confidence with an extended business trip for my job, it's still a very large and ugly monkey on my back.

I hate how I immediately feel my size is to blame if something goes wrong. He didn't call when he said he would - it must be because I'm fat. I didn't get a job promotion - it's because I am fat.

It's amazing how society's views and ostracizing of a group of people can fuck up a person's brain so much. And there's no group as mean as little children - I have the permanent emotional damage to prove it. No matter how many pounds I lose - I still cannot see myself as beautiful or pretty. Sometimes, no amount of makeup or pretty clothes can help me see past it.

It is an everyday struggle and it is getting easier because I know I am a great woman...but sometimes old doubts and insecurities creep in. I force myself to do things that make me stand up for myself and deal with the insecurities instead of running away from them. I just went to Europe, alone, and I did just fine. I've gone to India for extended trips as well for my job, and it's very hard to be there - land of the skinny, short people - but somehow I got through it. I just wish I could harness that feeling of empowerment when I am feeling inadequate here at home in the USA.

Sorry so long - but it felt good to put it in writing.

Girl..your not the only one! I, for one, know exactly how you feel. No matter what little haven's like Dimensions you may have to escape your insecurities. Unfortnately you can not carry all your supporters in your pocket when you enter that business meeting where people treat you differently than your slimmer counter part!
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Old 06-11-2008, 02:30 PM   #1161
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While you make wonderful points that childhood experiences can be devastating as one grows older.....but I can't overlook the fact you're talking about hating your fat on a forum where fat is accepted.

The people here will take one look at you and go "woah who's the babe" so maybe you need to meet some people like us instead of wanting to fit into society so badly.
I really don't think it has anything to do with fitting into society- it has to do with your own life's goals. If my goal is to be a VP of a company and I am doing everything I can- am qualified, educated and such... but continuously get overlooked - what would you start to think.

Unfortunately you may love fat chicks, you may be in touch with the "Fat World" but your not a FAT WOMAN therefore you will never trully understand our trials and tribulations or how society has affected us. And until your a fat women- you never will...it's not as clear cut as you think!
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Old 06-14-2008, 07:14 PM   #1162
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I'm eating Ben & Jerry's out of the carton.

Am I a fat girl yet?
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Old 06-14-2008, 07:21 PM   #1163
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I'm eating Ben & Jerry's out of the carton.

Am I a fat girl yet?
Allow me to bury myself in your sumptuous bosom and I'll let you know.
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Old 06-15-2008, 04:19 AM   #1164
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Is there anyone who DOESN'T eat B&J out of the carton? Seriously....has anyone ever seen anyone scoop some out of the pint into a bowl? I would wager that no one has seen it happen.

And if you have, pst pix pls.....just for proof. Because otherwise, I might not believe it....
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Old 06-15-2008, 07:28 AM   #1165
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Is there anyone who DOESN'T eat B&J out of the carton? Seriously....has anyone ever seen anyone scoop some out of the pint into a bowl? I would wager that no one has seen it happen.

And if you have, pst pix pls.....just for proof. Because otherwise, I might not believe it....
I figure I might have to share (quite against my will, mind you), so I scoop it into a mug for snack-sized servings.

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Allow me to bury myself in your sumptuous bosom and I'll let you know.
First opportunity we get, it's happenin'.

And there better be pix when it does.
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Old 06-15-2008, 10:44 AM   #1166
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What is this snack-sized serving you speak of? A pint is a snack....size....of sorts....right?
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Old 06-16-2008, 06:40 PM   #1167
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I just at this awesome, high quality hazelnut italian chocolate in one sitting... athen I realized when I turned it around that one serving (which is a lot of calories) is like 1/3 of it....

I did feel a small twinge of guilt.
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Old 06-17-2008, 05:40 AM   #1168
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Default Ah confessions. . .

I have several confessions, but none of them are really worth posting. .Well save the fact I make damn fine cheesecakes. . I love to cook and bake, otherwise I'm quite a boring person. Not much if any drama. . Perhaps the other confession is my total amazement with my ex-wife's ability to eat an entire package of chocolate chip cookies (at least a dozen) and a whole quart of milk literally every evening after a large dinner, yet her weight never fluctuated more than a pound or two. . .Even after having children. .amazing, yet confusing! hahaha
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Old 06-17-2008, 01:44 PM   #1169
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Default Fat jiggle...

IC... I've discovered that the stretch of CA State Hwy 30 between 5th St. and Highland Avenue (west bound in particular) is one of the best places to experience fat jiggle in a Ford F250. Also, there are some older portions of the Riverside Fwy that are pretty good.
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Old 06-17-2008, 02:40 PM   #1170
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Originally Posted by Plainguy View Post
I have several confessions, but none of them are really worth posting. .Well save the fact I make damn fine cheesecakes. . I love to cook and bake, otherwise I'm quite a boring person. Not much if any drama. . Perhaps the other confession is my total amazement with my ex-wife's ability to eat an entire package of chocolate chip cookies (at least a dozen) and a whole quart of milk literally every evening after a large dinner, yet her weight never fluctuated more than a pound or two. . .Even after having children. .amazing, yet confusing! hahaha
IC that I'd like to know more about these df cheesecakes of which you speak.
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Old 06-17-2008, 07:59 PM   #1171
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IC that i still feel like no one will ever be able to love me becasue i am big


i also confess that didnt stop me from going to bagel bagel for dinner....
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Old 06-17-2008, 09:59 PM   #1172
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I figure I might have to share (quite against my will, mind you), so I scoop it into a mug for snack-sized servings.



IC that if Kevin is sharing the Ben and Jerry's, no, he is NOT a fat girl yet
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...what I really mean to say is life is heart wrenchingly beautiful, unresolved, and right now...
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Old 06-18-2008, 08:24 AM   #1173
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Default My Confession

Well, it's my first post here (I've been a dimensions story reader for about seven years but have never done the forum until recently), so I might as well make it a confessional one.

Since the beginnings of puberty, I've (secretly) identified as a feeder and FA who loves fat women and fattening women, even though I've unfortunately never been with a woman above 140 and I've never helped someone gain. I'm a very skinny guy (like, under 130 lbs) and I've never identified as a feedee or gainer.

Last night, in one hour, I ate eight donuts, drank a half liter of whole milk, had three slices of bread with feta cheese smothered on, and then filled the rest with glass after glass of water until I couldn't physically take any more. It was one of the sexiest experiences of my life and now all I can think about is being fattened.
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Old 06-18-2008, 03:59 PM   #1174
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Lol, good point mszwebs! Definitely not a fat girl yet, BlackJack! Althoguh I'm willing to overlook this if you'll share the Ben & Jerry's with me! I love B&Js but I think America gets all the good flavours! And how much does it cost in USA? Where I live it's about $8-$10 a carton. Not cool when you're on a student budget!
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Old 06-18-2008, 05:49 PM   #1175
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Lol, good point mszwebs! Definitely not a fat girl yet, BlackJack! Althoguh I'm willing to overlook this if you'll share the Ben & Jerry's with me! I love B&Js but I think America gets all the good flavours! And how much does it cost in USA? Where I live it's about $8-$10 a carton. Not cool when you're on a student budget!
Damn, that's expensive!

Here it's like $3 a pint, I think. I'd have to double-check.
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