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Old 12-20-2005, 02:46 PM   #1
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Default Advice required about the girl of my dreams

Hello everybody. I rarely post here but have been lurking since about 1997/8 and I would just like your adult thoughts and advice about how to pursue this friendship/possible relationship. Please note, as this is the weight board, it contains my opinions and fantasies with regards to feeding and weight gain. However, I would appreciate your constructive comments.

This post is about a friend of mine who I have recently got back in touch with. I have changed her name to protect her identity.

About three and a half years ago I met a local girl who had just turned 16 years old through her mum who knew a friend of mine. One night a few weeks later she asked me round to her house where she had a tent in the back garden and a couple of her girl friends were staying the night with her. Of the two girls, Emma really caught my attention. She was taller than my friend and the other girl, very big boned but most of all she was quite fat with massive potential. Her face was very round, hint of a double chin but it was her thighs and butt that really struck me. I would've put her just above 200lbs, about 14-15 stone. We hit it off and became friends, texting each other often. Nothing really happened because the first friend and I had a bit of a carry on before I met Emma, so whenever I hinted at getting it on with Emma she just accused me of not being able to make up mind which girl I liked. Personality wise, both girls were great but a bit giddy for their age, but Emma's shape really excited me.

I saw them on and off over the next year or so, and sure enough, Emma began to get bigger. I don't think she was bothered about her extra weight because of the clothes she wore, but you could tell she lacked confidence in her esteem. To give you an example, Emma and my friend went on holiday to France about two years ago, and when they came back they were both nicely tanned. I remember them sitting on my garden patio and Emma just looked incredible. Probably about 250 by now, she was wearing grey jogging bottoms but they were skin tight on her. Her ass was amazing and her thighs were to die for. Her belly was overhanging the waistband onto her lap as she sat and her boob tube top left little to the imagination. Her flab was mesmerizing and I just wanted to squeeze her. Another time she was was walking past my house with my first friend and I didn't know it was her, but I just saw this huge butt waddling past with a big roll of flab exposed above her butt and round to her navel. Being the FA I am, when I realised it was Emma I ran after her and got into conversation with her.

I know this is a bit long but I just have to tell you. I didn't see them for a while but mid summer about 18 months ago (summer 04) I was sat with a gang in the beer garden outside my local pub and Vicky, one of the girls in the gang commented on someone a distance away down the pavement. Her comment went along the lines of, "OH MY GOD! There is no way I'd wear that if I was that big." Sure enough, Emma came along (18 now because I remember she came into the pub and ordered a drink legally) but she was wearing these white stretch pants that just accentuated the vastness of her thighs. She looked colossal! She must have been tipping the scales at 300. She was very fat all over, except for her thighs and ass which held a lot more fat. Needless to say, when they came into the pub I went and sat with them! But that comment from Vicky really had turned me on that hot summers day. Sitting with Emma though, her self esteem had plummeted further. Sad really, because she had beautiful long moussy coloured hair, a lovely fat face and her chest and belly had really filled out.

Again, I didn't see much of her for the rest of the year and that was in fact the last time I have actually seen her to date. But, get this. This time last year I was texting her to try and meet up with her. She said that she didn't want me to see her because some medication that she'd recently been on had caused her to gain even more weight. I just wondered if she might have been depressed. Before I carry on, you need to be aware that upto her being 300 pounds, this was without medicine. It is purely because she is a BBW and she does have an appetite according to the third friend from the camping story who now works at the same pub behind the bar. This girl also told me that Emma tries a different diet every now and again but gives up after a day!

Anyhow, when she didn't want to see me I texted her about me being an FA and that I will like her no matter what weight she was. In my head, I wanted her to be enormous but truth be known I haven't a clue how much weight she had gained, or whether she has even lost it to date. I also told her that I like very very fat girls and will always go for the fattest girl (first impressions right?). I told her about websites like Dimensions in the hope of boosting her self worth but I have no idea if she ever visited them. The next day she texted to say we were still friend and that I had said some pretty mind blowing stuff.

I don't know what happened next except that I must have given up or tried to supress my FA and feeder tendencies. But this year, they have won through and I am proud of it. This year I was dating a BBW (probably about 280) for about 3 months. When I was with her I longed to be with Emma though. No chemistry emerged and she didn't know about BBW/Feeder/Feedee community, but at least I had told Emma about it, albeit in a rather clumsy text message.

I split from my BBW girlfriend about 3 months back and a few weeks later in the pub I bumped into my first friend again. She is slim, she has cut her hair and changed its colour! She was with her boyfriend and it got me dreaming about Emma again, and whether I could try again with her. So this week I have been texting her and the responses are getting warmer. She seems a little non-plussed as to why I have revived my interest in her after over a year of not having seen her. I really want to catch up with her and maybe get with her. But of course, I really want to see how fat and beautiful she is now and how much weight she did gain.

In fantasy, I would like to be with Emma and for her to be 600 pounds of pure wobbling flab, and me feeding her but I know this is totally unrealistic at this moment in time. But I would really welcome your advice on how to approach her and also your thoughts on this life story from the last 3 and a half years.

For your information, I am a 25 year old FA living in north west England and I've lurked here for years. Isn't is great being an FA!

Thank you for reading and I really do look forward to your comments and observations.

Rob
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Old 12-25-2005, 06:43 AM   #2
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When I was actively dating (I'm 48, so that was in the 1970s) I knew all-too-well that most boys didn't like fat girls. I was also dimly aware that some boys loved fat girls, but they were interested only in the fat. Whenever someone took an interest in me, I always wondered whether all he wanted was my fat, and yes sometimes that was it. I really wanted to find a happy medium, someone who loved me for me, and accepted my huge package. Thank goodness I found and married a man who loves me first, and he views -- and hugs and massages -- my fat as a terrific bonus.

Be sure to let Emma know that yes you do find her figure attractive, but you are attracted to her as a person above everything else. I'm sure it's true, because you've dated other fat girls but none had the same chemistry as Emma. Tell her she is a great person, and if she happens to be fat, well, so much the better for some terrific hugs.

Just remember that every week you put off seeing Emma is one less week that you can be together with her. It's already stretched into a few years, so time's a-wastin'!
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Old 12-25-2005, 08:59 AM   #3
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argh. Can't really help you there, just wanted to say I got freaked out at first when I read that because my name is Emma and I'm from Northwest England! LOL
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Old 12-26-2005, 10:50 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by CurvyEm
argh. Can't really help you there, just wanted to say I got freaked out at first when I read that because my name is Emma and I'm from Northwest England! LOL
I almost thought the same thing. The dead giveaway was when he mentioned white stretch pants. You don't seem to be the type.
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Old 12-26-2005, 07:54 PM   #5
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Originally Posted by LillyBBBW
I almost thought the same thing. The dead giveaway was when he mentioned white stretch pants. You don't seem to be the type.
hahahahahah Oh yeah. I look so hot in white strech pants.... NOT!! lol

hahahah giggling away now. I don't do strechpants nevermind white ones LOL OH GOD. hahahahahah
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Old 12-27-2005, 04:04 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by CurvyEm
hahahahahah Oh yeah. I look so hot in white strech pants.... NOT!! lol
Oh.. I don't know!!! I'm sure you'd do something for me Em!

Anyway, her name was changed to Em to protect her. After I'd posted it I realised it clashed with you and I thought I was pretty stupid but it was totally unintentional. I feel like I've known you for years because I've lurked here for years. But rest assured we are miles apart! IIRC you are in the 01253 district, I am in 01925. Do your research Em!

The real Emma has been a bit flirty tonight on the text. But I am going to Ireland tomorrow and not back till Friday. Will update you all if there's anything to add but thanks for your comments so far, especially you Sue.

Rob x x
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Old 12-27-2005, 04:15 PM   #7
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Argh how do you know my dialing code? :P Is 01925 warrington? lol I used to go out with a guy from there lol.
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Old 12-27-2005, 04:25 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by CurvyEm
hahahahahah Oh yeah. I look so hot in white strech pants.... NOT!! lol

hahahah giggling away now. I don't do strechpants nevermind white ones LOL OH GOD. hahahahahah
I really didn't think there was enough alcohol in the whole world to make you slip and fall into a pair of white stretch pants. Not that I'm knocking Robukfa's girl at all. Just that I can't picture you squeezing into a pair, except under extreme duress.
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Old 12-27-2005, 08:44 PM   #9
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OK, I normally save this type discussion for posts over at the Fat Girlfriends Forum ( http://pub35.bravenet.com/forum/show...num=2994406099 ) where Q&A sessions like this happen fairly often. But you seem quite sincere, so here goes.

"Emma" is still exchanging emails with you so that's a good thing. She now knows FAs exist and that you are one, which may be something she's not ready to accept just yet as normal because it turns her value system upside down. Instead of playing the pity and blame game, blaming everything wrong in her life on her weight, she's now a potential competitor in an arena she never dreamed existed. But she hasn't rejected the idea either, so there's hope.

Sue is right -- being an FA is great, but the deeper relationship is what needs to be emphasozd. My b/f has never directly asked my weight, nor have I his. Its not the focus of our relationship, even though we both enjoy good food and plenty of it. I would advise you to stress other areas, especially her strengths, to help build her overall esteem.

If she wonders again at the attention gap over the years blame your own slowness in learning to be assertive and imply that you didn't think you were good enough for her 'cauise she seemed unreachable. The real problem, you now know, was your abiity to be sufficiently articulate and communicative. The past doesn't matter as much as the future - right? I like Sue's implied line "I like larger girls generally to begin with - but something about you has always been extra special." Its an opinion she has no comeback to and is 100% true.

Now, your next problem: what do you have to offer thsat she might care about? Do you have common interests and values? Are you secure in your job and career? Is there anything about you that might be a negative for her? These are areas you need to examine, then act on. Frankly I have a hunch "Emma" will in time turn out to be a very good friend and perhaps more!
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Old 12-27-2005, 11:20 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by CurvyEm
hahahahahah Oh yeah. I look so hot in white strech pants.... NOT!! lol

hahahah giggling away now. I don't do strechpants nevermind white ones LOL OH GOD. hahahahahah
Oh dear. Are stretch pants out of style?

Not the double knit indestructo stuff, of course. I know that went out of style with Elvis' jump suits. But how about cotton knit leggings type of pants? Or jersey knits for more dressy events? The problem is that knit pants are the only ones that don't hurt my belly. I used to wear tight jeans all the time until I finally got tired of having a perpetual bruise where my pants waist was. I started wearing stretch knits and elastic waists and haven't looked back! I may not be stylish, but I am oh so comfy.

I suppose I'm old enough to prefer comfort over fashion, though I find it a bit disconcerting to realize that I'm so out of it that the thought of my daily wardrobe brings gales of giggles and moans to younger gals. I would prefer to have both. Oh well. Let me know if there's any hope for me. Until then, I'll just wrap myself in my leggings and pink boa and the occasional black lace cat suit... or perhaps, on special occasions, my birthday suit.

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Old 12-28-2005, 05:38 AM   #11
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I still wear stretch pants. I have two pairs of black stretch capris that I wear mostly as an accessory with boots and a kurta or a pencil skirt. I just can't picture our Emma wearing white ones. I'd imagine that as soon as the white material touches her skin even accidentally she'd burn to cinders. That girl is a black wearer I reckon.
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Old 12-28-2005, 06:26 AM   #12
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Heh Yes misspiggysue, I'm more on about the white than the strechpants (Though they wouldn't be my sort of thing though because I like wearing skirts. But nothing wrong with those strechpants) heh

But yeah as for white, knowing my luck I'd sit in a big puddle or stain as soon as I got too far away from my house to go back and change! LOL
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Old 12-29-2005, 03:39 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CurvyEm
Heh Yes misspiggysue, I'm more on about the white than the strechpants (Though they wouldn't be my sort of thing though because I like wearing skirts. But nothing wrong with those strechpants) heh

But yeah as for white, knowing my luck I'd sit in a big puddle or stain as soon as I got too far away from my house to go back and change! LOL
Hey, I was halfway teasing y'all, too, goils, even though it's true that I'm a fashion disaster, usually. I prefer to think of myself as "individualistic," though I must admit that I have to remind myself to look at what style shoes people are wearing every few years or so. heh

And yeah, I'm a black stretchpants kind of a gal, myself. Well, sometimes purple. But white is out of the question until I make a lot more money than I do... enough to where I could afford throw-away pants! lol I tend to be a bit messy, myself. Though in my younger years, back in the 60s, I did have an off white wool straight skirt with an off white cable knit sweater that was exquisite. I only wore it to church, though.

Also, I do remember seeing the editor of the original BBW magazine, Carol something, on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show one night in the 1980s. She came out in a beautiful all white suit. I think it was cashmere. I know it looked rich. What a striking figure she cut. And I remember how she told him that people tell us not to wear white, but then she asked him if she had worn black or navy, would he have been fooled into thinking she wasn't fat? I had never heard such a thing in my life! Johnny also just looked at her and laughed, because of course, it was a ludicrous idea. And so, she opined, why not wear beautiful clothing rather than "slimming" clothing? And you could tell he really admired her and thought she was a beautiful woman, white suit and all.

I had such a bad case of fat/self-loathing back then, courtesy of my fat-phobic family, that I think she was the first fat woman I ever thought was beautiful, myself. Anyway, I will never forget that white suit of hers and the wonderfully liberating idea behind it.

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Old 12-29-2005, 05:44 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by MissPiggySue
Also, I do remember seeing the editor of the original BBW magazine, Carol something, on Johnny Carson's Tonight Show one night in the 1980s. She came out in a beautiful all white suit. I think it was cashmere. I know it looked rich. What a striking figure she cut. And I remember how she told him that people tell us not to wear white, but then she asked him if she had worn black or navy, would he have been fooled into thinking she wasn't fat? I had never heard such a thing in my life!
Amen. Oh, sure, I blend. LOL
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Old 02-12-2006, 07:23 AM   #15
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The real Emma has been a bit flirty tonight on the text. But I am going to Ireland tomorrow and not back till Friday. Will update you all if there's anything to add but thanks for your comments so far, especially you Sue.
So ... any update?
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Old 02-26-2006, 09:14 AM   #16
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Hi all,

Not really anything to report I'm afraid. She told me that she didn't want a relationship with anybody at the moment. Fair enough. I don't know why we still can't meet up though, but that's her choice. Perhaps she still feels insecure and a bit threatened, or that she might like me! But she always says that we argue. I say we don't and she says we do! Then we do! So, is that like some kind of defence mechanism?

Anyway, I saw her a couple of weeks ago as I was passing through town. She was with her friend and she was smiling. She looked much the same and I hope she's happy. I was in a friends car at the time and we were late heading somewhere, so I put her out of my mind.

So that's it really. Sorry there's nothing juicy. But I think I have developed some kind of fatigue at the moment. I have run out of steam persuing girls that really are hung up about themselves and I try and convince them that they are beautiful. But, I know I shouldn't give up and I won't, but sometimes you just feel like I can't be bothered trying to get a girlfriend. I am 26 now and my mind is on business matters at the moment. I'll keep my eyes open though, you never know which BBW is round the corner!

Edit: I think I got the stretch pants bit wrong!!! They were like leggins or something but I've no idea what they're really called!
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Old 02-27-2006, 11:11 AM   #17
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Rob (I'm assuming that's your name): I definitely hear ya. It's sad but true that a lot of bbw's, especially younger ones, have a hard time accepting themselves (duh, with society blaming them at every turn). I tell you from experience that, as much as waiting sucks and is annoying as hell, a lot of times it can be counterproductive to just start blasting her with information about bbw and fa and telling her she's one of the hottest girls you've ever met. I now realize (I hope, I haven't had the opportunity to put it into practice yet), that it takes time to completely revolutionize the way you look at yourself, and that you should be there for her to coax her along: be support, but don't try to do it yourself. When it comes down to it, she needs to decide for herself that she's sexy. A good, caring man, I think, can go a long way towards producing that decision, but you can't just blast her with it and expect her not to feel some shellshock. Subconsciously, she may think it's a horrible joke or something.

SORRY if I'm being too preachy (I know I am). I get it from my mom, I guess... she's always offering me unsolicited advice... I don't know why I do it too. Lah.

Well, best of luck.

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Old 02-28-2006, 11:47 PM   #18
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Unhappy I feel ya there

Well, I kind of feel the same way about my dream girl, Robuk. I kind of hold alot of high standards, which means it will take longer since more specific traits are desired than normal. I say you did go through alot, and, that is how it is for alot of us. I say go for it, ya know? Life is about taking risks, right?

But, for me, someone's fat is what makes them appear more beautiful. I would never "want a BBW just for her fat(that makes no sense to me)", for me, fat is connected to someone's body when someone enjoys it and really feels connected to it. Hence, the fat and proud personality I like.
I am only 18 too, I got alot of time to search for that special someone.
I hope my observations help. Which I thought I spoke too much about myself.
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~Ark
I am large, but not in charge! :p
"Everything has a good, bad, nuetral side to it, based on one's perspective."
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