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Old 10-30-2009, 08:40 AM   #1151
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If you lift up the hood, you see small... pistons...

*quits channeling GEF*
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Old 10-30-2009, 10:54 PM   #1152
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Originally Posted by jenboo View Post
Eh? I have not heard that one before.....
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Originally Posted by KHayes666 View Post
yeah I too have no idea what that means....
I took it to mean he was telling everyone what kind of car he has since riding in cars has been mentioned several times in this thread.
I mean shit......if I had a Mercedes, I'd have to mention it myself

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If you lift up the hood, you see small... pistons...

*quits channeling GEF*
But then again....this answer is much better


I so have to remember to come back and rep you
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Old 11-12-2009, 07:50 AM   #1153
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Yes those things are issues. I tried to anticpate some of these things before I dated the first ssbbw I knew. I got better at it. The benefits far outweigh the limitations. One thing I did not know how to handle at first was getting seat belt extensions for my car.

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Old 11-17-2009, 07:31 PM   #1154
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all i have to say isn't all this common knowledge? idk maybe it is for me since my mom is an ssbbw.
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Old 11-17-2009, 07:40 PM   #1155
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the other day i had a day out (not a date) with my new housemate, i needed to get out of the house and he said he was going to the mall so i decided to tag along. he walks really really fast and i had to almost do a little run at times to keep up! and i won't even go into how quickly he climbs stairs which was absolute torture for me. maybe it was my fault for not requesting if he could walk slower but surely he must have seen how uncomfortable it was for me? i don't know anymore, it makes me wonder what i'd have done if it was an actual date
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Old 11-17-2009, 09:59 PM   #1156
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all i have to say isn't all this common knowledge? idk maybe it is for me since my mom is an ssbbw.
haha Clearly not, since we had to have a thread about it.

But thumbs up to the fact that it all sounds logical and rather...Duh lol. That means A) we're not making this shit up and B) that some people have enough common sense to realize that being an/being with an SSBBW isn't the cakewalk that the fantasy world might portray.

Rep for you, Balooningboy.
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Originally Posted by bdog
...what I really mean to say is life is heart wrenchingly beautiful, unresolved, and right now...
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Old 11-17-2009, 10:00 PM   #1157
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So I am ready for a bf. I am thinking I will be finding someone in the next few months and as a ssbbw woman I will have a couple of extra expectations for my new guy....I call this my boyfriend list of things he can do that I have trouble with. I live on my own and there are some things that are being neglected until I find my honey

Get under the bathroom sink and replace the bar thingy that keeps the drain closed

Change the light bulbs in the light fixtures that are too high for me to reach

Put my bike in the storage locker

Move my shelves, book cases and desk around that will make much more sense. they are still in the exact same place that they were in when the movers left them.

I think that is it for now. Any lovely fa's interested in helping me out
Dang...wish it were that easy and convenient for me lol
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Old 11-17-2009, 10:03 PM   #1158
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B) that some people have enough common sense to realize that being an/being with an SSBBW isn't the cakewalk that the fantasy world might portray.
Sometimes there is cake involved, tho.
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Old 11-17-2009, 10:04 PM   #1159
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Sometimes there is cake involved, tho.
Not if I can help it. I prefer brownies, and fudge like ones at that
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Originally Posted by bdog
...what I really mean to say is life is heart wrenchingly beautiful, unresolved, and right now...
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Old 11-18-2009, 08:15 AM   #1160
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the other day i had a day out (not a date) with my new housemate, i needed to get out of the house and he said he was going to the mall so i decided to tag along. he walks really really fast and i had to almost do a little run at times to keep up! and i won't even go into how quickly he climbs stairs which was absolute torture for me. maybe it was my fault for not requesting if he could walk slower but surely he must have seen how uncomfortable it was for me? i don't know anymore, it makes me wonder what i'd have done if it was an actual date
Is this the same charmer who was all chummy chummy with you at home but then wouldn't utter two words to you when you were among friends and out in public? Sorry to bring that up on you girlie but it sticks out in my mind. I remember when I read that my face went . I'm thinking this guy is scumming you and is in desperate need of a beating. Catch him off guard and tell him straight out that you don't need him making you feel like a piece of shit and to not think for a minute that he's so slick that you can't see exactly what's going on. I can see it from here. Girl, I'm ready to come over there.
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Old 11-18-2009, 08:18 AM   #1161
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the other day i had a day out (not a date) with my new housemate, i needed to get out of the house and he said he was going to the mall so i decided to tag along. he walks really really fast and i had to almost do a little run at times to keep up! and i won't even go into how quickly he climbs stairs which was absolute torture for me. maybe it was my fault for not requesting if he could walk slower but surely he must have seen how uncomfortable it was for me? i don't know anymore, it makes me wonder what i'd have done if it was an actual date
i walk pretty quickly, but i'm not always a fan of stairs. i have almost (almost!) no shame in saying to someone: I'll meet you up there! and then finding an elevator. Feeling we have to do something to keep someone else happy, or whatever the motivation is, isn't necessary much of the time.
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Old 11-19-2009, 05:56 AM   #1162
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the other day i had a day out (not a date) with my new housemate, i needed to get out of the house and he said he was going to the mall so i decided to tag along. he walks really really fast and i had to almost do a little run at times to keep up! and i won't even go into how quickly he climbs stairs which was absolute torture for me. maybe it was my fault for not requesting if he could walk slower but surely he must have seen how uncomfortable it was for me? i don't know anymore, it makes me wonder what i'd have done if it was an actual date
My suggestion is to politely ask him to slow down the next time you're out in public and explain why. If he says "Oh I'm sorry" and starts walking slower, then he's listened. However if he just looks at you funny and continues running up the stairs.....I think you know what to do with him.

When I'm by myself or with my friends, I shoot up and down stairs faster than anyone and pretty much power walk where I'm going. However when I'm with ssbbw friends I slow down considerably and do what I can to accomidate. I have some trouble sometimes slowing down because of my ADD and its nothing personal to who I'm with.

Like I said, take the guy aside and tell him why he should slow down...at least you'll find out if he's listening to your or not.
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Old 12-18-2009, 04:55 AM   #1163
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the other day i had a day out (not a date) with my new housemate, i needed to get out of the house and he said he was going to the mall so i decided to tag along. he walks really really fast and i had to almost do a little run at times to keep up! and i won't even go into how quickly he climbs stairs which was absolute torture for me. maybe it was my fault for not requesting if he could walk slower but surely he must have seen how uncomfortable it was for me? i don't know anymore, it makes me wonder what i'd have done if it was an actual date
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Is this the same charmer who was all chummy chummy with you at home but then wouldn't utter two words to you when you were among friends and out in public? Sorry to bring that up on you girlie but it sticks out in my mind. I remember when I read that my face went . I'm thinking this guy is scumming you and is in desperate need of a beating. Catch him off guard and tell him straight out that you don't need him making you feel like a piece of shit and to not think for a minute that he's so slick that you can't see exactly what's going on. I can see it from here. Girl, I'm ready to come over there.

I'm totally with Lilly on this one!! The guy sounds like such a dick! Btw, its 5 hours by train to London from here.. I hear people need to walk slower when they have broken legs!! muwhahaha!. Hmm.. i'm not really in the scottish mafia.. though if he is the same guy who is treating you like shit in other areas of your life.. i wish i was! I would get that guy to fuck. You really don't need him. Actually, it sounds like he is making you feel shit.
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Old 12-21-2009, 05:20 AM   #1164
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First off, your husband is a Mensch and has your Comfort in mind ... yes an SSBBW has special needs and unfortunately there are several industries that make things without consideration of the SSBBW or SSBHM. Those issues were addressed at almost all NAAFA and ISAA meetings ... and it is 40 years ago that NAAFA was formed ... as well as Dimensions magazine. And one more thing with regards to handling the sales reps ... i would have walked away and called the manufacturer and registered a complaint with NAAFA that Ford is not making enough cars with large people in mind.

Ladies and gentlemen, we've come a long way from the days this movement has been in place... but as all of us know we need to put pressure on the Travel industry, the auto industry, the Clothing industry, the Movie theaters, the public school system, and dozens of other areas that need to be addressed.

You are going to hear more of the approach to end fat discrimination but more work has to get done.

One way I use with the men is this. Take a thin typical teenage gal in your arms and hug her... then do the same with a large lady and do the same ... tell me in all honesty which do you like .... all other factors being equal ...


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You are so right about the car. My husband owned a Camaro when we first met, his dream car. I was not SS at the time, but still very large. He immediately made plans for a larger car. Every car we have had or even considered since then, is with my size and accessbility in mind.
Even with our second car, the one he drives to work, has to fit me. And he has a long commute so we are very concerned with gas mileage, but he makes sure I can fit. He even took the old seats out of his old S-10 Blazer to put in a bench seat so that I could fit in it.
Our main car is a Chevy Caprice that is large and roomy. Still, he keeps talking about a Caprice wagon that he keeps seeing for sale. Like, hey babe, just think how roomy that would be.
And none of our cars are new. We can only afford used, but we get what we can.
The one car we did buy new in 1993 was a Ford Taurus that I really wanted. We told the sales guy we wanted to only look at ones that had a bench seat. Well, most didn't, and he kept showing them to us. Hubby is like, I SAID I want a bench seat. The guy is like, but why? and hubby turns and points to me and says, its for her, that's why. And the guy finally showed us the only one they had on the lot. We ended up buying it and I loved her for a long time. Eventually I did outgrow the car, but I LOVE my 1995 Caprice.

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Old 12-21-2009, 03:59 PM   #1165
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wow, I love reading this thread...it's awesome! I haven't had good experiences, but my ex always kind of told me that my size was my own problem...

I was married for 5 years to someone who was not an FA (or at least he says he isn't one)...he was 6'4 and 170 lbs.

He wouldn't slow down to walk with me and often told me to hurry up.

He got upset when I took longer at the airport (taking off your shoes to go through security and then putting them back on can be a HUGE chore for an SSBBW)...he had anxiety too which didn't help, but I remember one time at the airport he was chosen for a random screening and blamed me because I was too slow and so we "looked suspicious" Here I was, standing there as this big sweaty mess, already nervous about trying to cram myself down aisles of people and squeeze into a seat as it was, and he was yelling at me in an airport...

Then there was the time I TOLD him I would slip if I went through the mud to get to our apartment, and he insisted I do it anyway...and sure enough I slipped...and a back fracture and 6 months on medical leave from work later, he realised it might have been a bad idea to have me go that way...

man do I have some stories...so to all the FA's out there who are reading this thread and taking notes, or who are already doing these things, kudos! this is a very valuable thread!
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Old 12-21-2009, 04:34 PM   #1166
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Any FA taking me on would need a lot of patience with me,a great deal of understanding,and a very slow walk,with the exercise I have been doing I can stand for 20 minutes now,double that of 3 months ago..I need help putting shoes on too...
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Old 12-21-2009, 09:05 PM   #1167
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wow, I love reading this thread...it's awesome! I haven't had good experiences, but my ex always kind of told me that my size was my own problem...

I was married for 5 years to someone who was not an FA (or at least he says he isn't one)...he was 6'4 and 170 lbs.

He wouldn't slow down to walk with me and often told me to hurry up.

He got upset when I took longer at the airport (taking off your shoes to go through security and then putting them back on can be a HUGE chore for an SSBBW)...he had anxiety too which didn't help, but I remember one time at the airport he was chosen for a random screening and blamed me because I was too slow and so we "looked suspicious" Here I was, standing there as this big sweaty mess, already nervous about trying to cram myself down aisles of people and squeeze into a seat as it was, and he was yelling at me in an airport...

Then there was the time I TOLD him I would slip if I went through the mud to get to our apartment, and he insisted I do it anyway...and sure enough I slipped...and a back fracture and 6 months on medical leave from work later, he realised it might have been a bad idea to have me go that way...

man do I have some stories...so to all the FA's out there who are reading this thread and taking notes, or who are already doing these things, kudos! this is a very valuable thread!

It is easy to understand why he is no longer married to such a wonderful, beautiful woman. How could anyone treat another person so badly.
Yes this thread is important, though I suspect that much what those who are not supersized need to do when out with a supersized person involves common sense, kindness, and simply asking the supersized person a few questions (i.e. where would you like to sit in the restaurant, May I assist you, or let's sit here for a while.)
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Old 12-22-2009, 01:35 AM   #1168
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It is easy to understand why he is no longer married to such a wonderful, beautiful woman. How could anyone treat another person so badly.
Yes this thread is important, though I suspect that much what those who are not supersized need to do when out with a supersized person involves common sense, kindness, and simply asking the supersized person a few questions (i.e. where would you like to sit in the restaurant, May I assist you, or let's sit here for a while.)

Aww thanks, I don't know if he was just a jerk, or if he just didn't realise...part of it was my own fault for trying so hard to be normal that I don't think he realised that I needed extra help, but there are times when I just wanted to smack some sense into him...

I think it really does just require common sense, but I guess for some people it doesn't come naturally at all!
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Old 12-22-2009, 12:32 PM   #1169
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Aww thanks, I don't know if he was just a jerk, or if he just didn't realise...part of it was my own fault for trying so hard to be normal that I don't think he realised that I needed extra help, but there are times when I just wanted to smack some sense into him...

I think it really does just require common sense, but I guess for some people it doesn't come naturally at all!
I am glad you moved up and got rid of him. He was a jerk, no doubt about it.
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Old 12-22-2009, 12:52 PM   #1170
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My comments are inside Maureen's remarks. A BBW is first and foremost a lady and deserves to be treated the way you want to be treated by your partner or for that matter any caring person ...

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wow, I love reading this thread...it's awesome! I haven't had good experiences, but my ex always kind of told me that my size was my own problem...

I was married for 5 years to someone who was not an FA (or at least he says he isn't one)...he was 6'4 and 170 lbs.

He wouldn't slow down to walk with me and often told me to hurry up.

David - Again You ex had no sense of your needs ... me - I'm very considerate ... even if it puts me out 10 minutes to get to our destination having you besides is enough of a reason.

He got upset when I took longer at the airport (taking off your shoes to go through security and then putting them back on can be a HUGE chore for an SSBBW)...he had anxiety too which didn't help, but I remember one time at the airport he was chosen for a random screening and blamed me because I was too slow and so we "looked suspicious" Here I was, standing there as this big sweaty mess, already nervous about trying to cram myself down aisles of people and squeeze into a seat as it was, and he was yelling at me in an airport...

David - What kind of empty headed boor is he - yelling at his wife for being slow in an airport ... and why didn't he get a long shoehorn to help you get your shoes on?

Then there was the time I TOLD him I would slip if I went through the mud to get to our apartment, and he insisted I do it anyway...and sure enough I slipped...and a back fracture and 6 months on medical leave from work later, he realised it might have been a bad idea to have me go that way...

David - Suffice you got rid of that empty headed boor who *** would not help a disabled elderly person *** either I'll bet!

man do I have some stories...so to all the FA's out there who are reading this thread and taking notes, or who are already doing these things, kudos! this is a very valuable thread!
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Old 12-22-2009, 01:22 PM   #1171
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Yes this thread is important, though I suspect that much what those who are not supersized need to do when out with a supersized person involves common sense, kindness, and simply asking the supersized person a few questions (i.e. where would you like to sit in the restaurant, May I assist you, or let's sit here for a while.)
My experience is that most people view the world from their own perspectives and have a hard time walking in someone else's shoes, and grasping others' strengths and limitations, even when it's obvious. I fall into that pitfall too sometimes. My husband says he's not an FA per se, but he's been keen to learn. I knew he was a keeper when he began to ask about my needs. Wellll, after I knocked him over the head a few times to make him understand.

One turning point was an early date when he took me to a nice restaurant but clearly had no idea I couldn't fit in the booth. "Okay Mr. Engineer, take one look at that booth and guesstimate whether my big fat ass (which you have been squeezing) and big fat rest of me will fit. Extra credit if you find a table that will fit me. Now!" The transition of his face from Blank Stare to Dawning Understanding showed me that the guy had potential. From then on, he made sure to ask about my needs. Sometimes he asked wayyyy too many questions, but better too many than not enough.
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Old 12-25-2009, 09:10 PM   #1172
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My experience is that most people view the world from their own perspectives and have a hard time walking in someone else's shoes, and grasping others' strengths and limitations, even when it's obvious. I fall into that pitfall too sometimes. My husband says he's not an FA per se, but he's been keen to learn. I knew he was a keeper when he began to ask about my needs. Wellll, after I knocked him over the head a few times to make him understand.

One turning point was an early date when he took me to a nice restaurant but clearly had no idea I couldn't fit in the booth. "Okay Mr. Engineer, take one look at that booth and guesstimate whether my big fat ass (which you have been squeezing) and big fat rest of me will fit. Extra credit if you find a table that will fit me. Now!" The transition of his face from Blank Stare to Dawning Understanding showed me that the guy had potential. From then on, he made sure to ask about my needs. Sometimes he asked wayyyy too many questions, but better too many than not enough.
Too many questions are much better then no questions at all!
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Old 12-26-2009, 01:27 PM   #1173
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Too many questions are much better then no questions at all!
questions need to be asked beforehand,to avoid embarrassment I think,my ex liked my size but couldn't handle me in public.
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Old 12-26-2009, 03:45 PM   #1174
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questions need to be asked beforehand,to avoid embarrassment I think,my ex liked my size but couldn't handle me in public.
Sorry if this appears to be an intrusive question, but did your ex have experience with ssbbw's before dating you?

I once went out with a ssbbw when I was only 18 and had none, zero, nada experience and I looked like a total fool.

Maybe he was just inexperienced, I could be wrong though.
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Old 12-26-2009, 05:00 PM   #1175
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Aww thanks, I don't know if he was just a jerk, or if he just didn't realise...part of it was my own fault for trying so hard to be normal that I don't think he realised that I needed extra help, but there are times when I just wanted to smack some sense into him...

I think it really does just require common sense, but I guess for some people it doesn't come naturally at all!
He was a major jerk if he didn't notice or care about what you were going through or your basic needs, like walking slowly etc.. That goes for anyone whether they are fat or slim or married to someone who is fat or thin. I find marriage is all about being attuned to my partner.
You certainly deserve better and I am sure you will find it!

Lots of luck to you!
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