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Old 05-07-2008, 01:09 PM   #1
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Default no-one hates fat chicks but fat chicks

if i may i would like to play devils advocate..and i'll tell you my truths, as i see them in my 29 years (nearly 30) on this planet.

The only people i have met who dont like fat women are fat women themselves.
I'm not talking about "fat acceptance" in society i.e whether an employer would favour a thin person over a fat person..etc.. i'm talking about everyday scenarios and body acceptance..
ok.. every EVERY (i said it twice to accentuate the fact) fat woman i know..doesnt like thier bodies!! (some have a feeling of slight acceptance but WANT to be thinner).
i'm not talking about the enlightened few that i have chatted to over the years on-line (some have said they loved thier bodies..but as i got to know them said that ACTUALLY they would prefer to loose weight)

but this brings me to my point..(i dont want to rant for a thousand words because i will bore myself)..
The only people that i have ever heard fat hating comments from have been fat themselves..
i have a few friends who are "f'a" or who have no preference but love fat women too..and of course have nothing but great things to say about thier experiences with big women/men (i know some chubby chasing bears too).

but ..some of the comments i have heard from big women have been:
"i hate my body"
"how can you find THIS attractive" (talking about thier body).
"my breasts are grotesque"
"my god, she shouldnt be wearing that, when she is that size"

sad to say..but the list goes on and on..

and frankly as an FA i am sick and tired of it..
to be honest i am tired of constantly reasuring people of how beautiful/attractive they are.
i am sick of being constantly probed and questioned as to "why i find thier bodies attractive"
i am anoyed beyond utter belief at the fact that the only people who have said i was "fucked up" or words to that affect when i say i like big women were big women themselves!!! (well except my mum.. but thats another funny story).
anyway..men love curves! its evolution.. and in my case i love curves.
i'm not sure how that fits into to evolutionary psychology of things ...but i do..
women are thier own worst enemies at times..
and i think that the world would be a fat happier place were it not for that fact.
you can rant on about society and social conformity..
but nothing can be changed by just sitting still..
but you see..its deeper that that...with fat acceptance its not just that fat people are standing back letting bigotry happen..
they are actually adding to it.. to the negativity..

and you know what..i will fight in every corner.

its like if martin luther king had been white ..fighting for the civil liberties of black people and black people had been self deprocating and didnt care about the rights or the beauty of other black people..

its like if germain greer was a man and fought for womens rights but the women just stood back muttering that infact men were better !!

i know that here ..obviously is a slightly more "enlightened" space for fat people.. but it seems that the reality is VERY different..
especially in scotland..where "fat" is a dirty word..which has not been reclaimed as something positive.

it just seems like a loosing battle sometimes.. and FA's can do thier bit.. but its really sad that big women/men are sometimes so disparaging of NOT only themselves but of other fat people..

fatism is the last bastian of bigotory ..
and its NOT FUCKING ACCEPTABLE!
as i tell my fat friends as they put down other fat people!

ok ..rant over..i'm off to get drunk and write some songs with my bi-fatual friend!..

xmer
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Old 05-07-2008, 01:16 PM   #2
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Umm - there are lots of women that are thin that hate their bodies - I would say that almost all do as well - they are always trying to lose weight - or even plastic surgery to "lift" things.

Fat women are not exclusive in not liking their bodies 100% of the time. Yeah I wish my ass was bigger and my belly was smaller but over all Im pretty happy with my body -

I hate my age more than I hate my body -

As for reassuring a person all the time how attractive they are to you is annoying. BUT thin women do this too - hell big burly men do it. There are, in all walks of life people that have hang ups - If you love some one even if they have hang ups - well than you are going have to tell them more about their eyes and how wonderful they are.


Oh and yes there are people that hate fat chicks just cause they are fat. That is coming from a woman that has never had a non fat day in her life.

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Old 05-07-2008, 01:30 PM   #3
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"no-one hates fat chicks but fat chicks"

Oh font of compassion. Internalized hatred is an ugly thing to be sure, but so is your post.
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Old 05-07-2008, 01:34 PM   #4
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What Berna said and I'll add we know of at least two thin/average women who hate fat women too (see "Why Are You Here?" thread).

Bigotry is sadly universal, as is lack of self esteem among men and women fat or thin (a big thank you or perhaps fuck you to the media for this).
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Old 05-07-2008, 01:42 PM   #5
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Fat hatred knows no bounds, Mer. I'm glad you haven't experienced the full spectrum, but I sure have, and I can tell you that young, old, fat, thin, male or female, we are universally feared (bwahahaha!!)

Society, driven by greedy 'health and beauty' corporations, has been taught to fear and despise fat. Too many people internalize those screwed up messages. Fortunately, many of us here have been able to find enough value in ourselves to give them the finger.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:13 PM   #6
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Quote:
and frankly as an FA i am sick and tired of it..
to be honest i am tired of constantly reasuring people of how beautiful/attractive they are.
The thing is, that though you want to be helpful, you are not the person who as felt badly, who has felt marginalized. You don't get it because you are not "it".
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:15 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Waxwing View Post
The thing is, that though you want to be helpful, you are not the person who as felt badly, who has felt marginalized. You don't get it because you are not "it".
and YOU know.. that ive NEVER been fat??
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:22 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by ThatFatGirl View Post
What Berna said and I'll add we know of at least two thin/average women who hate fat women too (see "Why Are You Here?" thread).

Bigotry is sadly universal, as is lack of self esteem among men and women fat or thin (a big thank you or perhaps fuck you to the media for this).
well..how long can you blame the media for?
"9 out of 10 dr's smoke malbougho (or however that is spelled)"
"women... know your limits"..
i could go on..
yes..the media will always be there, spouting propiganda..with its own agenda..
but we must read between the lines..
also what you say is a western representation of the media..
the media in, trinidad (say) advocates that thin women are percieved as "ugly"..
the women over there eat "chicken feed steroids" because if your not at LEAST a size 18 then you get laughed off the beach for being too thin..
wah wah
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:24 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by Tina View Post
Fat hatred knows no bounds, Mer. I'm glad you haven't experienced the full spectrum, but I sure have, and I can tell you that young, old, fat, thin, male or female, we are universally feared (bwahahaha!!)

Society, driven by greedy 'health and beauty' corporations, has been taught to fear and despise fat. Too many people internalize those screwed up messages. Fortunately, many of us here have been able to find enough value in ourselves to give them the finger.
aye.. good..and its a fabulous thing.. this minority finger!!
but tis a finger none the less!!
excellent work!!
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:29 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by Ella Bella View Post
What is up with all the name calling in posts lately?


Body hatred isn't a fat chick only thing. Yup there are fat chicks out there that hate their bodies, and there are fat chicks out there that are also perfectly comfortable and happy with their bodies.
indeed..
the point i was making..was..
in my experience.. it has only been big women who have been disparaging of other biog women..
and aye.. name calling is pish.. really it is.. but to say my post is ugly.. obviously means that it was utterly missunderstood.. and i cant be bothered with that...
if you dont understand something.. then ask...dont just hit out against it all..
i'm glad though because i think this is a very real issue.. and if people react strongly to it, then it must hit on something that is real.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:34 PM   #11
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I don't know if it will help any, but i can vouch that this gal does in fact like fat chicks hehe. I've chatted with Lisa (mergirl) on the phone a few times and have chatted with her online too many times to count and on cam. I guarantee that her eyes would light up just like any male FA i've ever known when she'd getta peek at some fat belly or booty lol

She says what she thinks, but there's no ill intent towards fat women in her posts...this gal has lots of fat gal love

Now as for my answer...i gotta go with Berna on this. Women are just women..and most women hate their bodies in general, fat or skinny. You know me and that i'm pretty darn confident, but there are still parts of my body i'm not satisfied with. Do i focus on them? nope...because there are so many other things that i am happy with that i don't worry about those things

and you will notice that i AM using your quote from the other post in my siggy hahahhaa

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Old 05-07-2008, 05:38 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by mergirl View Post
and YOU know.. that ive NEVER been fat??
no, not at all. I don't know that. What I think I know is what people will feel when reading this post.

mergirl, you have views I agree with absolutely. But bringing them to the community in such a contentious way is not necessarily going to give you a good result.

I never in any way implied that you've never been fat. I don't know if you're male or female, fat or thin.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:41 PM   #13
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Calling someone like sweet and fat moronic...really makes me want to listen to what they are yapping about...yeah. Jaysus. Do you really want to talk TO and WITH people, or just at them.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:45 PM   #14
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Originally Posted by largenlovely View Post
I don't know if it will help any, but i can vouch that this gal does in fact like fat chicks hehe. I've chatted with Lisa (mergirl) on the phone a few times and have chatted with her online too many times to count and on cam. I guarantee that her eyes would light up just like any male FA i've ever known when she'd getta peek at some fat belly or booty lol

She says what she thinks, but there's no ill intent towards fat women in her posts...this gal has lots of fat gal love

Now as for my answer...i gotta go with Berna on this. Women are just women..and most women hate their bodies in general, fat or skinny. You know me and that i'm pretty darn confident, but there are still parts of my body i'm not satisfied with. Do i focus on them? nope...because there are so many other things that i am happy with that i don't worry about those things

and you will notice that i AM using your quote from the other post in my siggy hahahhaa
muwahahaa..mwah..missus.. thank you for being my "honners" (which is scottish for my back up tag team..lmao)
totally..everyone has thier insecurities..fat and thin..
you know me.. and i am a wee stirrer.. i like to stir things up or else it all goes stagnent!
did it come across in my post like i had "ill intent" to fat chicks???
well that certainly wasnt ment .. of course not...
i guess i was talking about women in general..
how hyper critical they are of themselves AND others...
SERIOUSLY... most of the fat chicks i know.. have made disparaging comments about other fat chicks... which is shitty... but i guess socially learned or whatever...
but you would NEVER hear me making these comments..
hmmm....
also.. i was over emphisising my anoyance when i said i was sick of reasuring people of thier beauty... i ment that as a social comment!! like... why should i have to...
and i am hearing ..from all corners of the globe "because humans are intrinsically insecure"..
hmmm. aye whatever..
we ARE talking about your cock right?
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:46 PM   #15
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Originally Posted by Waxwing View Post
no, not at all. I don't know that. What I think I know is what people will feel when reading this post.

mergirl, you have views I agree with absolutely. But bringing them to the community in such a contentious way is not necessarily going to give you a good result.

I never in any way implied that you've never been fat. I don't know if you're male or female, fat or thin.
what do you mean by a "good result"?
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:49 PM   #16
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Originally Posted by mergirl View Post
what do you mean by a "good result"?
xmer
Just that people can be really emotional (and rightly so) about things that matter to them. I know I am. Stirring up conversation about a sensitive topic is a good thing, but it's hard to do in a way that doesn't scare people off.

Hell, I've not managed to figure out a good way to do it yet.
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:53 PM   #17
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yeah hon...it was the title i believe, but i KNOW better, though some of the other folks around here don't know ya. I think everyone is way sensitive after what happened on the other thread. If i didn't know you personally and know what a sweet FA ya are, i would be wondering myself.

but like i said...i know better

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did it come across in my post like i had "ill intent" to fat chicks???
well that certainly wasnt ment .. of course not...
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:53 PM   #18
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Originally Posted by Waxwing View Post
Just that people can be really emotional (and rightly so) about things that matter to them. I know I am. Stirring up conversation about a sensitive topic is a good thing, but it's hard to do in a way that doesn't scare people off.

Hell, I've not managed to figure out a good way to do it yet.
muwahahahahaha... if i scare people off then ...wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!
you know..i would rather someone got pissed off and made a noise about it than felt kinna a sorta wee stirring of emotion and said nothing..
i DO play devils advocate.. and for that reason,,
i think the scary things have to be debated..
cause more often than not, the monster hanging out by your door is just and old coat... but you only can know that by turning on the light,,
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Old 05-07-2008, 05:59 PM   #19
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There is a difference between being dissatisfied with your own fatness and hating other fat women.

I love fat women. I wish I had a ss friend nearby that I could do things with.

It's kinda funny, but whenever my sister is watching dog shows I root for the fat women handlers. I feel like they're "my people."

But I reserve the right to think something someone is wearing is butt-ugly, fat or thin, lol.
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:01 PM   #20
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Originally Posted by largenlovely View Post
yeah hon...it was the title i believe, but i KNOW better, though some of the other folks around here don't know ya. I think everyone is way sensitive after what happened on the other thread. If i didn't know you personally and know what a sweet FA ya are, i would be wondering myself.

but like i said...i know better
oh WHOOAT?? what happened in the other thread?? i need to go put on my velma specs and investigate!!??
yeah!! i am a headline grabber!! lmao.. my first was "trusting trolls"..
i think that once people read past it.. thier hackles will be up and they will say something interesting...
perhaps my headline should have been "sometimes all sorts of humans feel insecure and that insecurity manifests itself outwardly so that they reflectivly give out negative energies to those who emulate them somehow"..
i bet no one would have read that,,,
oooh i'm off to read the contravercial post.. and JUDGE JUDGE JUDGE!!!!! muwahahahaha
where is it?? lmao..
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:06 PM   #21
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There is a difference between being dissatisfied with your own fatness and hating other fat women.

I love fat women. I wish I had a ss friend nearby that I could do things with.

It's kinda funny, but whenever my sister is watching dog shows I root for the fat women handlers. I feel like they're "my people."

But I reserve the right to think something someone is wearing is butt-ugly, fat or thin, lol.
true.. but seriously.. i do know a lot of big women who react really negativly when they see other big women..
its horrible and sad.. and i know and hope and prey that its not true of ALL big women.. but i have seen it happen..
i think mainly it might be a reflection of a personal insecurity..but still..
and whoot! i LOVE dog shows.. have you seen the film "best in show"?
i soo want to go to crufts! and i shall cheer on all the underdogs.. erm..like the wee sausage ones with the tiny legs!!
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:17 PM   #22
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Yeah, we watch Crufts every year, and a ton of American ones, from Westminster on down. There are so many fat handlers! (haha, fat handlers)
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:22 PM   #23
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mergirl, you are just bananas. In a really funny refreshing way. I love it.
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:31 PM   #24
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Yeah, we watch Crufts every year, and a ton of American ones, from Westminster on down. There are so many fat handlers! (haha, fat handlers)
muwahahaa.. i LOVE fat handlers! dog shows are great! i have a wee lab/collie cross.. i would love to take her to "scruffts" ITS A REAL THING!!! but she is really badly trained and a wee pest..but sooooo cute and i love her!
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Old 05-07-2008, 06:35 PM   #25
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mergirl, you are just bananas. In a really funny refreshing way. I love it.
lmao... erm thank you.. i am kinna glad my contravercial thread had been overshadowed by that other one...erm "why are you here" or whatever it was.. i still dont get that?!
i feel like the abolition of gay weddings on 9/11.. THAT HAPPENED! i blame... erm.. the pope or someone,,,
anyway...what is that weird unprivate pm post all about... i only got to the 6th page and then my brain got twitchy and i cared for it not...
i need a summerisation!! if that is a word..
if not.. then i would love the whole dramarama to be summerised for me..
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