Is Dim a Fat Acceptance or Size Acceptance Site?

[Michelle]

What do you think? I'm not voting until there are several responses.

[RedHead]

Thanks Michelle for putting this out there....I'll be interested to see the final results.

[CurvyEm]

Basically to me this is a size for fat people and their admirers. There are plenty of size acceptance sites out there and I don't really think dimensions needs to cater for all.

[Miss Vickie]

I think it should be a size acceptance site, and in fact has evolved to that point over the years. I have to disagree with Em, though, about there being a lot of SA sites out there. It seems they are few and far between. It seems to me that there are two camps, the "oh my God, you're going to die a miserable death if you're over 10 pounds overweight" which you find on dieting sites, or the "stay fat at all costs because if you want to lose weight in order to be healthy you're a traitor to the movement" of fat acceptance sites.

I'd love to know of any "fat is nice but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing and let's support you at being healthy at a weight that's right for YOU" sites.

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by Miss Vickie

I think it should be a size acceptance site, and in fact has evolved to that point over the years. I have to disagree with Em, though, about there being a lot of SA sites out there. It seems they are few and far between. It seems to me that there are two camps, the "oh my God, you're going to die a miserable death if you're over 10 pounds overweight" which you find on dieting sites, or the "stay fat at all costs because if you want to lose weight in order to be healthy you're a traitor to the movement" of fat acceptance sites.

I'd love to know of any "fat is nice but there is such a thing as too much of a good thing and let's support you at being healthy at a weight that's right for YOU" sites.

I totally agree...I have googled over and over and the only pop I got was Dimensions!

[NancyGirl74]

I started coming here when I began to feel I was too large for the regular BBW rooms. I chat in Dim chat and have been made to feel very much at home and very welcome. However, there have been times when I have been told that I'm on the small side. So where do I fit in? If not here or regular chat then where?

I am a heavy person (fat, bbw, ssbbw,...whatever) and I am just now coming to terms with being ok with my size after a life time of name calling, stares, and shame. That is a HUGE step for me. However, that doesn't mean that I won't diet or try to lose weight. On the contrary the more ok I am with me the more I want to be healthy. For me that means losing enough weight to not have constant back pain, knee aches, depression, lose of breath, and all the other chronic aliments that overweight people (not all) tend to suffer. I also have high blood pressure so I need to be cautious. I have lost weight and I continue to try. As a result I am more confident and proud of my size and shape then I have ever been. I will never be skinny. It's just not in my DNA. But I feel better now at 300 pounds then I have in a long, long time.

So again, if I don't belong "out there" and I don't be long here where is it that I should go?

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by NancyGirl74

So again, if I don't belong "out there" and I don't be long here where is it that I should go?

Nancy...you belong here; just reading your post makes me know that beyond a shadow of a doubt!

[NancyGirl74]

Thank you, Red! ((hugs))

[Miss Vickie]

Originally Posted by RedHead

Nancy...you belong here; just reading your post makes me know that beyond a shadow of a doubt!

What she said.

Oh and I really like your avatar.

[LillyBBBW]

I think this is primarily a fat acceptance site. While no one is discouraging anyone from doing what they need to do or being who they are it is fat that brings people here in the first place not skinny acceptance, not weightloss acceptance, not Jesus acceptance. This is a place where many things are discussed and people are free to agree or disagree and all are welcome to stay, but the sign on the door is clear:

"Dimensions Online is the website of Dimensions Magazine which has been published since 1984 as a forum for those who prefer the large figure and the people who attract them."

[NancyGirl74]

Thank you, Vickie.

[Santaclear]

I think Dim's more Fat Acceptance site than Size Acceptance. Witness the Weight Board, the story area (which I have no interest in) and the Paysite Board for evidence of lust and admiration.

I think it's GREAT the site can be different things to different people tho. That's the only way it can be healthy and make a difference.

[JoyJoy]

In the 8 years I've been coming to this site, this question has come up before....in my experience, most often in the chat room, since that's where I've spent most of my time here. I've heard many people, mostly women, say exactly what Nancy has said..that someone has told them they're too small, etc. What I and others have told these people is that this is an *acceptance* site, that all should feel welcome here, no matter their size, because while someone might come here feeling they're overweight at 200 lbs and feeling a need to reach a level of self-acceptance, another is going to look at that person and call them thin...it's all about perspective. Everyone has a need for acceptance...and everyone has their own definition of *fatness*. Anyone who would look at another and decide they don't belong here simply because that person doesn't fall into their personal parameters would, to me, be the one who is out of place.
Yes, there are aspects of this site for those who enjoy gaining and all that comes with it. There are also options for people on all ranges of the spectrum, from those trying to be thinner, to those trying to be healthy at whatever weight they're at, to those who are still in the process of accepting themselves. If someone interacts with another who makes them feel unwelcome here, then they're talking to the wrong people..because as long as there is respect for others and respect for the rules, it's my understanding that all are accepted, regardless of body size or size-philosophy.

[RedHead]

Joy, Joy...that was eloquent and I couldn't have put it better myself! Definitely repalicious!

[fatlane]

I am not fat. Please accept me. Thank you.

[moonvine]

Really, I think all you need to do is look at which boards are most popular to have your answer.

Weight board? Check! Paysite board? Check! Story board? Check!

WLS controversy board? Not so much. Even the main board does not get as much action as I would like.

[Miss Vickie]

Well, just because a board isn't popular doesn't mean that it's not a good idea, or useful for the community. In some ways I think the fact that it doesn't get a lot of use is probably good; it means that most people are satisfied with their size, which I think is great. I know I was satisfied with mine until my health problems started to snowball out of control, and the efforts I was making weren't cutting it.

Like others here, I'm glad this place can be different things to different people. I wouldn't dream of taking the Weight Board or story board away from the people that enjoy it because -- whether I like it or not -- that's part of the fat experience. And I would hope that there would be support from those who even wouldn't it for a safe place to discuss health issues and how to go about mediating them without loading up on pharmaceuticals. That's why I'd rather see the WLS board broadened to encompass all kinds of ideas for weight loss, rather than just surgical. That way those who don't want to be exposed to diet talk -- won't be. And those who are interested in "doing something" about their weight because it has become intolerable to them will have a place -- within the overall concept of size acceptance, rather than in a site surrounded by skinny minny's -- to discuss it.

To me, doing that would give Dimensions greater flexibility and serve the larger population. Because, like it or not, weight loss attempts often ARE part of the "fat experience". I think if we can at least share good, reasonable ideas, it would enhance the experience for if not many people, at least the handful who need it most.

[NFA]

Fat acceptance IS size acceptance. Anyone who tries to reappropriate "Size Acceptance" as some kind of completely unnecessary diet and fat-loathing acceptance movement should be ashamed of themselves. A lot of people have worked very hard for Size Acceptance for decades and you insult all of them when you try to redefine what they spent their time, money, and energy working towards. You feel there is a deep need to protect the rights of people who don't like being fat? Find your own vocabulary. Don't steal from people you verifiably don't agree with. Nor respect given your eagerness to twist their hard-work to suit your fundamentally opposing views.

[TraciJo67]

Originally Posted by NFA

Fat acceptance IS size acceptance. Anyone who tries to reappropriate "Size Acceptance" as some kind of completely unnecessary diet and fat-loathing acceptance movement should be ashamed of themselves. A lot of people have worked very hard for Size Acceptance for decades and you insult all of them when you try to redefine what they spent their time, money, and energy working towards. You feel there is a deep need to protect the rights of people who don't like being fat? Find your own vocabulary. Don't steal from people you verifiably don't agree with. Nor respect given your eagerness to twist their hard-work to suit your fundamentally opposing views.

NFA, you are addressing a woman who is fat, was fatter, and says that she'll probably remain fat for the rest of her life. It is how she defines herself. Furthermore, Vickie has been an established voice within the size acceptance community for many years. It is in fact through her that I even learned that these type of websites exist.

What *I* don't respect is some snotty jab at a person that *you* don't agree with. And BTW, Vickie is the furthest thing from fat loathing that I know. To me, militant people who cannot be flexible are often the LEAST accepting of themselves, and of other people.

[Miss Vickie]

Originally Posted by NFA

Fat acceptance IS size acceptance. Anyone who tries to reappropriate "Size Acceptance" as some kind of completely unnecessary diet and fat-loathing acceptance movement should be ashamed of themselves. A lot of people have worked very hard for Size Acceptance for decades and you insult all of them when you try to redefine what they spent their time, money, and energy working towards. You feel there is a deep need to protect the rights of people who don't like being fat? Find your own vocabulary. Don't steal from people you verifiably don't agree with. Nor respect given your eagerness to twist their hard-work to suit your fundamentally opposing views.

NFA, you didn't read my post, didn't understand what I was saying, and completely missed the mark. It seems to me that your lust for fat women has made you blind to the problems that we -- as fat women -- face. Walk a day (if you can) in the Birkenstocks of a woman who is over 300 pounds, a woman who cries in pain each day, a woman who is watching her mobility slipping away, and THEN tell me I'm insulting size acceptance. Because until you have, then you have no right to speak about my experiences or aims.

I answered a question posed in this forum. Don't like it? Then come up with your own. But don't you dare think for one second that you can even come close to knowing what it's like to live as a fat woman. Because you clearly do not get it.

[Miss Vickie]

Originally Posted by TraciJo67

NFA, you are addressing a woman who is fat, was fatter, and says that she'll probably remain fat for the rest of her life. It is how she defines herself. Furthermore, Vickie has been an established voice within the size acceptance community for many years. It is in fact through her that I even learned that these type of websites exist.

What *I* don't respect is some snotty jab at a person that *you* don't agree with. And BTW, Vickie is the furthest thing from fat loathing that I know. To me, militant people who cannot be flexible are often the LEAST accepting of themselves, and of other people.

Thank you, dear. Nice to know you've got my back.

[TheSadeianLinguist]

Originally Posted by NFA

Fat acceptance IS size acceptance. Anyone who tries to reappropriate "Size Acceptance" as some kind of completely unnecessary diet and fat-loathing acceptance movement should be ashamed of themselves. A lot of people have worked very hard for Size Acceptance for decades and you insult all of them when you try to redefine what they spent their time, money, and energy working towards. You feel there is a deep need to protect the rights of people who don't like being fat? Find your own vocabulary. Don't steal from people you verifiably don't agree with. Nor respect given your eagerness to twist their hard-work to suit your fundamentally opposing views.

I would say Fat Acceptance is a facet of Size Acceptance. It's probably the largest, but nonetheless, it's just a facet. I'm of the opinion there's enough room for EVERYONE when it comes to loving and accepting your body. I've never been "medically obese," and I'll never walk in those shoes. Why? I couldn't tell you. It's not that I have a pristine eating record or that I've always been very good to my body. There are people who have eaten exactly the same way I have and weigh 350 lbs. I know because I've spent time around such people, but I digress.

One of the most influencial people in my life was a BBW who was my psychiatrist when I was a kid. She was also the first person to expose me to the concept of size acceptance. She actually brought in print versions of Dimensions. She didn't say it wasn't for me. (And if it's exclusively for fat people to join, I definately wasn't making the mark back then.) I'm significantly larger than Western Civ's "ideal woman," and SA has definately been great for me. Why bar people who can benefit?

[RedHead]

Originally Posted by TheSadeianLinguist

I would say Fat Acceptance is a facet of Size Acceptance. It's probably the largest, but nonetheless, it's just a facet. I'm of the opinion there's enough room for EVERYONE when it comes to loving and accepting your body. I've never been "medically obese," and I'll never walk in those shoes. Why? I couldn't tell you. It's not that I have a pristine eating record or that I've always been very good to my body. There are people who have eaten exactly the same way I have and weigh 350 lbs. I know because I've spent time around such people, but I digress.

One of the most influencial people in my life was a BBW who was my psychiatrist when I was a kid. She was also the first person to expose me to the concept of size acceptance. She actually brought in print versions of Dimensions. She didn't say it wasn't for me. (And if it's exclusively for fat people to join, I definately wasn't making the mark back then.) I'm significantly larger than Western Civ's "ideal woman," and SA has definately been great for me. Why bar people who can benefit?

If I wasn't already married I ask you to! You rock...and I think I'm developing a serious crush!

[TheSadeianLinguist]

And my mother could finally have that red-headed daughter she's always wanted!!! You're the grooviest, Red.

[RedHead]

Ohhh Baby....but really...you do rock. I love to read your posts..you are poignent, kind and insightful; all at the same time.

You are truly wise beyond your earthly years!