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Old 10-31-2008, 08:51 AM   #51
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I didn't say only an Fa could Love her this Passionately, I said i have never Been this passionate with anyone before. The more and more i think about this the answer is too complicated to lay out in a forum thread. I do not just love her because she's fat, although I do worship and caress every inch of her.

What I'm really telling her is I love her and She Is stunningly Beautiful and i'm Scared of losing her Because i'm so far away, If i agreed with society and thought i was some gift to Fat girls then why did i fall for one 3000 miles away wouldn't it be more productive to tear through New England Breaking the hearts of Big girls along the way

Yes I'm a fat admirer and the One "Fatty" That stole My heart is in California sure there are plenty Of Beautiful Big Girls around here but none of them are Misty.

iOr maybe i'm not an fa Maybe i just love her so completely That physical attraction is a moot point (of course that wouldn't explain the obsessive tummy rubs)

I believe i am an fa (fat admirer Not abuser) and along the way while admiring Fat woman I found My Dream "Fatty"

also i believe i tend to obsess over the Physical because I can't Have it. We connect emotionally everyday on the phone or on video chat etc. so when i start to write about my Misty it very often becomes a rant about her physically how i want to hold her, How I'm dying to feel her close, pressed tightly against me, How i want to feel her lips on mine. How i wish i could run my hands through her hair and smell her perfume. We send t-shirts back and forth to each other to feel closer, when they stop smelling like her i turn it in on the t-shirt exchange program (sounds goofy but it gets me through the lonely Nights)

this is starting to feel like the question "do you love her Because of or inspite of her Fat?" the answer is neither I Love her, And She happens to be Fat. I noticed her because of her fat and back then she was really only Chubby lol.

I'm not about to try to say i understand what it's like to be fat i was a fat kid growing up i Know it's hard but i was a kid not an adult i was a boy not a woman and i lived in the north east not the West Coast and all these things and more dictate each "Individuals" experience

Sorry if this seems disjointed i just let it flow hopefully it makes sense
i respect your feelings for Misty very much. but i'd have to say respectfully that it sounds like fantasy to me. i personally think you only truly know a person and whether you love them by being with them day to day. but then only you can truly answer that for yourself. you never have to explain how or why you do love her anyway. if you do then you just do. but, i'm going to say this for her. if you love her so much you should be together and make the sacrifice. people don't live forever and you'll be forever kicking yourself if you waste time if you already know that you love her.

also when you said "Olwen you need to get yourself a true FA" i just interpreted it that you thought FAs were the only way for her to go because you felt so intensely for your girl in that particular way. are you really sure that other men don't feel that intensely about the women they love as well. people have different ways of expressing and experiencing feelings. there is more than one way. fatty love may be one. but there are lots of others too. it doesn't make any of them wrong or right. her belly may do it for you but for someone else it could be something else entirely. the question for Olwen is not how she should EXPECTto be loved but how would she LIKE to be loved.

Last edited by superodalisque; 10-31-2008 at 09:03 AM.
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Old 10-31-2008, 09:01 AM   #52
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Most people barely understand themselves, let alone other people. Empathy can lessen the psychological distance between different people, but there is a limit to how much that can happen.

So ya, I said what everbody else in the thread has been saying
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Old 10-31-2008, 01:25 PM   #53
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i respect your feelings for Misty very much. but i'd have to say respectfully that it sounds like fantasy to me. i personally think you only truly know a person and whether you love them by being with them day to day. but then only you can truly answer that for yourself. you never have to explain how or why you do love her anyway. if you do then you just do. but, i'm going to say this for her. if you love her so much you should be together and make the sacrifice. people don't live forever and you'll be forever kicking yourself if you waste time if you already know that you love her.

also when you said "Olwen you need to get yourself a true FA" i just interpreted it that you thought FAs were the only way for her to go because you felt so intensely for your girl in that particular way. are you really sure that other men don't feel that intensely about the women they love as well. people have different ways of expressing and experiencing feelings. there is more than one way. fatty love may be one. but there are lots of others too. it doesn't make any of them wrong or right. her belly may do it for you but for someone else it could be something else entirely. the question for Olwen is not how she should EXPECTto be loved but how would she LIKE to be loved.
Believe me if it were that easy i'd have moved to cali months ago unfortunately I have a house in mid remodel I'm trying to finish. I can't just sell it as is because it's a family property so i have to finish it and be sure it stays in the family, And of course most importantly I have a 4 year old daughter here and i'm not exactly prepared to move clear across the country and leave her here. Misty and i are talking and trying to find a solution that we can all deal with. Nothing worth having is easy. In time we will be together.

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i'll be so happy for you when you do experience it. its so worth the wait. i can't tell you how much i miss it.
and when i told olwen to find a true FA i was kind of Re-iterating what YOU Said, i just didn't realize the term FA was inappropriate
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this place..its like an onion wrapped in an inigma wrapped in a conundrum wrapped in a mumu!!

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Oh the life of an Fa.. its like a rollercoaster on a bouncy castle in a haunted mansion sometimes!
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Old 10-31-2008, 02:17 PM   #54
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This thread has raised some brilliant questions.

In terms of empathy, some people are able to empathise, put themselves in another's shoes, and others can't. Fat or thin.

How can an FA get it right? I echo what Tragdor says: it's hard enough understanding yourself let alone another person.

Just as edx said on the first page: In terms of being fat, although we fat people have many shared experiences, discomforts and so on, we're all different people with differing slants on life. My experience of being fat in Liverpool in the naughties, is probably different from someone in LA and again different from another in Bangkok.


SUPERODALISQUE makes some brilliant points in this thread. All bodies change over the years and I, too, have wondered what would become of a relationship with a FA if the fat were to go (for whatever reason). Is it the be all, end all?
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Old 10-31-2008, 02:54 PM   #55
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SUPERODALISQUE makes some brilliant points in this thread. All bodies change over the years and I, too, have wondered what would become of a relationship with a FA if the fat were to go (for whatever reason). Is it the be all, end all?
I've missed that. But i've been thinking about that a lot because an ex brought this up once. And i've talked about this on another thread.

When you're in love or when you love, you have to realize that the other might change physically. I can be paralyzed by an accident, she can have whatever you can think of. Would you stay and support? Yes, without a doubt.

Of course it will cause an enormous strain in your relationship, but i will go for it. On the other hand, i don't know what i would say to her when i would no longer be able to give her sexual pleasure.

Being an FA makes no difference in this case.
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Old 10-31-2008, 03:06 PM   #56
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Perhaps, B68, you could video the wobble before the weight falls off, then revisit it prior to jumping on the bones?
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Old 10-31-2008, 03:11 PM   #57
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Most people barely understand themselves, let alone other people. Empathy can lessen the psychological distance between different people, but there is a limit to how much that can happen.

So ya, I said what everbody else in the thread has been saying
That's why some threads are so interesting. In allmost every reply there's something that makes you dig in your brain to find out if your original view on things was right.

When you're really honest to yourself, you'll understand yourself a tiny bit more every day. Speaking for myself, some critical people here have made me an even wiser man than i already was
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Old 10-31-2008, 03:13 PM   #58
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Perhaps, B68, you could video the wobble before the weight falls off, then revisit it prior to jumping on the bones?
Of course i do. I'm not a fool
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Old 10-31-2008, 06:19 PM   #59
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That's why some threads are so interesting. In allmost every reply there's something that makes you dig in your brain to find out if your original view on things was right.

When you're really honest to yourself, you'll understand yourself a tiny bit more every day. Speaking for myself, some critical people here have made me an even wiser man than i already was
Your absolutely Right about this as soon as i think i have a good response to a thread Someone poses a question that makes me question my own post! Usually from Olwen Or Lilly Why it's them that make me think more than i usually do i will never know lol
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this place..its like an onion wrapped in an inigma wrapped in a conundrum wrapped in a mumu!!

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Oh the life of an Fa.. its like a rollercoaster on a bouncy castle in a haunted mansion sometimes!
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Old 10-31-2008, 06:32 PM   #60
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Many people on the boards report on what it's like to be fat: the constant well-meaning intrusions and unwanted suggestions for losing weight... the physical realities of being fat (both positive and negative)... the forced invisibility and de-sexualization (or oversexualization) of fat... the random insults shouted from passing cars... the toils of finding clothing that fits...

Clearly being fat is frequently a unique, complicated experience of itself, with both many wonderful highs and a number of disheartening lows.

My question for FAs is: How do you show your understanding of fat people's unique experiences, in your relationships with fat people? How does someone's experience of being fat play into and determine your relationship with them, and how do you respond to this? Are you more accommodating? Can you sympathize fully with the fat experience, or does it remain essentially foreign to you? ...............................................Or?
Well depending on the point of view of the person in question, I was once heavier, and shorter, which at the time it happened made my peers and some of my family members consider me fat when I was younger.

It's kind of hard for me to answer the other questions, and there's two reasons why.

-I know some situations in relation to fat are going to be similar for many if not all fat people, but I don't try to approach it trying to having an automated answer to every situation. I should be aware of certain things (And take note of certain threads here for that exact reason), but every person, regardless of size, has different experiences. That connects to the second reason:

- Minus some things that might be/are size specific, I really don't intend to make my relationship with fat women any different than one I might have with someone smaller. I want to chat, cuddle, take them out, do that romantic stuff, and just be nice you know?
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Old 10-31-2008, 06:32 PM   #61
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Many people on the boards report on what it's like to be fat: the constant well-meaning intrusions and unwanted suggestions for losing weight... the physical realities of being fat (both positive and negative)... the forced invisibility and de-sexualization (or oversexualization) of fat... the random insults shouted from passing cars... the toils of finding clothing that fits...

Clearly being fat is frequently a unique, complicated experience of itself, with both many wonderful highs and a number of disheartening lows.

My question for FAs is: How do you show your understanding of fat people's unique experiences, in your relationships with fat people? How does someone's experience of being fat play into and determine your relationship with them, and how do you respond to this? Are you more accommodating? Can you sympathize fully with the fat experience, or does it remain essentially foreign to you? ...............................................Or?
Well depending on the point of view of the person in question, I was once heavier, and shorter, which at the time it happened made my peers and some of my family members consider me fat when I was younger.

It's kind of hard for me to answer the other questions, and there's two reasons why.

-I know some situations in relation to fat are going to be similar for many if not all fat people, but I don't try to approach it trying to having an automated answer to every situation. I should be aware of certain things (And take note of certain threads here for that exact reason), but every person, regardless of size, has different experiences. That connects to the second reason:

- Minus some things that might be/are size specific, I really don't intend to make my relationship with fat women any different than one I might have with someone smaller. I want to chat, cuddle, take them out, do that romantic stuff, and just be nice you know? Not that you're saying that it should be different, but I personally don't want that at all if possible. At least conceptually that is.
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Old 10-31-2008, 08:21 PM   #62
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Fasc, maybe the topic for this thread should be "Do fatties understand FAs?"
This sounds like one hella good sister thread to me.......
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Old 10-31-2008, 09:23 PM   #63
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This sounds like one hella good sister thread to me.......
That's a very repable post, GEF. Ummmm......er.......
but, well, you know..........
Someone please help me.
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Old 11-01-2008, 05:34 AM   #64
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I haven't read this thread but 'do FAs understand fatties?' My immediate response would be does any man understand women? I don't think so. We keep trying but we just keep getting it wrong. You're just so damn complex! why can't you be more like men - eat, think about sex, work, think about sex, sleep, think about sex, football, think about sex...........
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Old 11-01-2008, 07:19 AM   #65
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I haven't read this thread but 'do FAs understand fatties?' My immediate response would be does any man understand women? I don't think so. We keep trying but we just keep getting it wrong. You're just so damn complex! why can't you be more like men - eat, think about sex, work, think about sex, sleep, think about sex, football, think about sex...........

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of a lot of money to be made by controlling it!

Life is only therapy, real expensive and no guarantees.

Fat is only ugly to those who hate.

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Last edited by imfree; 11-07-2009 at 12:16 PM.
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Old 11-01-2008, 11:29 AM   #66
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I haven't read this thread but 'do FAs understand fatties?' My immediate response would be does any man understand women? I don't think so. We keep trying but we just keep getting it wrong. You're just so damn complex! why can't you be more like men - eat, think about sex, work, think about sex, sleep, think about sex, football, think about sex...........

by jove! runningman i think you've got it! i wish my process were so simple *sigh*. does this mean i have penis envy?
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Old 11-01-2008, 12:07 PM   #67
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FAs see one side that fatties don't, of the hatred toward them, because we aren't necessarily fat and people will just say anything to us without holding back, assuming we're just one of them by default. Unless someone knows I'm an FA (and even sometimes when they do) I'm amazed at the shit people think it's ok to just be an asshole about. People think it's funny to do a "random" rant about "I hate those girl who wear t-shirts too small with their gut hanging out" etc. I know those people, butthead.
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Old 11-01-2008, 05:52 PM   #68
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I haven't read this thread but 'do FAs understand fatties?' My immediate response would be does any man understand women? I don't think so. We keep trying but we just keep getting it wrong. You're just so damn complex! why can't you be more like men - eat, think about sex, work, think about sex, sleep, think about sex, football, think about sex...........
Well, I understand FA to include both male and female Fat Admirers; and I understand "fatties" to include both male and female fatties.

As to my being so darn complex... Thank you. I'll take that as a compliment. Let me tell you, though, that my day is not so different from yours. Minus the football. That's just icky.

Dan, are you working for the Village Voice now?
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Old 11-01-2008, 06:15 PM   #69
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i respect your feelings for Misty very much. but i'd have to say respectfully that it sounds like fantasy to me. i personally think you only truly know a person and whether you love them by being with them day to day. but then only you can truly answer that for yourself. you never have to explain how or why you do love her anyway. if you do then you just do. but, i'm going to say this for her. if you love her so much you should be together and make the sacrifice. people don't live forever and you'll be forever kicking yourself if you waste time if you already know that you love her.

also when you said "Olwen you need to get yourself a true FA" i just interpreted it that you thought FAs were the only way for her to go because you felt so intensely for your girl in that particular way. are you really sure that other men don't feel that intensely about the women they love as well. people have different ways of expressing and experiencing feelings. there is more than one way. fatty love may be one. but there are lots of others too. it doesn't make any of them wrong or right. her belly may do it for you but for someone else it could be something else entirely. the question for Olwen is not how she should EXPECTto be loved but how would she LIKE to be loved.
I expect to be treated with respect, and I expect the guy to be crazy about me mentally and physically. I don't think those are expectations that FAs can't fill. Those are expectations that all guys can fill. I don't see how being an FA should take away from that ability.
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Old 11-01-2008, 06:19 PM   #70
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I haven't read this thread but 'do FAs understand fatties?' My immediate response would be does any man understand women? I don't think so. We keep trying but we just keep getting it wrong. You're just so damn complex! why can't you be more like men - eat, think about sex, work, think about sex, sleep, think about sex, football, think about sex...........
HA. Who says we don't. But you know, this thread is about female fat admirers and bhms too.
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Old 11-01-2008, 06:23 PM   #71
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People think it's funny to do a "random" rant about "I hate those girl who wear t-shirts too small with their gut hanging out"
I hate it, too. Especially when they're not available and ready for action.
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Old 11-01-2008, 07:18 PM   #72
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Hehe, someone said penis in this thread......
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Old 11-02-2008, 10:15 AM   #73
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Hehe, someone said penis in this thread......
Yup, the penis is the biggest, hardest to deal with problem in this thread.

Somehow, some of us trust these things to be our intellectual advisers... I mean, have you ever seen one...? Even when the independant thinkers try to control the threat with a firm grip, it's so headstrong that it will blow into a big mess.

And because men don't like mess, they just fall asleep.
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Old 11-02-2008, 10:18 AM   #74
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Yup, the penis is the biggest, hardest to deal with problem in this thread.

Somehow, some of us trust these things to be our intellectual advisers... I mean, have you ever seen one...? Even when the independant thinkers try to control the threat with a firm grip, it's so headstrong that it will blow into a big mess.

And because men don't like mess, they just fall asleep.
Yes... We all know how powerful penises are and how they rule everything there is and all the rest. There's no accounting for the power of penis!

*yawn*

You were more interesting when you were talking intelligently about being an FA instead of gushing forth about how crazy headstrong your pee-pee is.
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Old 11-02-2008, 10:20 AM   #75
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Yup, the penis is the biggest, hardest to deal with problem in this thread.
Are you trying to tell me something?
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