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Old 01-26-2009, 06:10 PM   #1
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Question FFA's: could You See Yourself Dating a Skinny Man?

I know this is a sensitive subject so I'm approaching it with caution...

I've always wondered what anyone else would say to this question. I'm really wondering if I'm just a horrible person when I say that I really can't see myself dating a thin guy.

It's not as if I would say no to a guy just because he's not bigger, but when I close my eyes and think about the guy I want to be with, he's always been big. If I try to force myself (and I do have to force myself) to picture a slender-type of boy, it doesn't feel right. =/

Maybe it's just because I'm only comfortable imagining, like, my DREAM guy and anything less then that isn't what I want? Or am I just a bad person?

What do you guys say? >> When you picture a 'boyfriend' in your head, is he always bigger?

On a side note, am I the only one who imagines fake boyfriends? XD

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Old 01-26-2009, 06:34 PM   #2
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StrawberiPai View Post
I know this is a sensitive subject so I'm approaching it with caution...

I've always wondered what anyone else would say to this question. I'm really wondering if I'm just a horrible person when I say that I really can't see myself dating a thin guy.

It's not as if I would say no to a guy just because he's not bigger, but when I close my eyes and think about the guy I want to be with, he's always been big. If I try to force myself (and I do have to force myself) to picture a slender-type of boy, it doesn't feel right. =/

Maybe it's just because I'm only comfortable imagining, like, my DREAM guy and anything less then that isn't what I want? Or am I just a bad person?

What do you guys say? >> When you picture a 'boyfriend' in your head, is he always bigger?

On a side note, am I the only one who imagines fake boyfriends? XD

Eh as I have said many times...personality is everything to me. I've dated thin guys, muscular guys, and chubby guys. I can definitely say I prefer my men to be bigger, but I'm not going to ask someone to be something theyre not. So if I did happen to be attracted to a thin guy and things worked out I wouldn;t mind being with him....although the physical attraction for me wouldnt really be there
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Reckon it's fatal, but just look at the ratings.
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TiVo the laughter and mute the screams.
Thus we bottle all our tears inside,
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Old 01-26-2009, 06:51 PM   #3
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My boyfriend IS skinny...I went from dating a 350lb. BHM *drools* to dating a normal, 150lb. guy.

It's a helluva transition, but personality and morals win out over physicality.


Oh, but I do totally have an obese imaginary boyfriend.
He's effin' hot.

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Old 01-26-2009, 06:53 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by Love.Metal View Post
My boyfriend IS skinny...I went from dating a 350lb. BHM *drools* to dating a normal, 150lb. guy.

It's a helluva transition, but personality and morals win out over physicality.


Oh, but I do totally have an obese imaginary boyfriend.
He's effin' hot.

<3
I totally agree *nods*
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So shall we recap this pathetic life?
I'll role the clip, you'll hold the knife.
Rewind back to when you cared,
then fast-forward to the scars we bare.
And we'll open our eyes to find everything's fading.
Reckon it's fatal, but just look at the ratings.
Because the populace indulges through TV screens,
TiVo the laughter and mute the screams.
Thus we bottle all our tears inside,
repress the pain till our hearts collide...
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Old 01-26-2009, 07:02 PM   #5
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I think any time your not with your "Dream" partner your selling yourself short. I can't imagine going "If only they were this or that" I've been there done that. 10 years down the road you start doing and thinking crazy things. So do yourself a favor, love the relationship your in, with the person your with. Don't waist time and energy hoping for it to be something different than it is.

Or as Opra said it :

“Be thankful for what you have; you'll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don't have, you will never, ever have enough.” - Oprah Winfrey
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Old 01-26-2009, 07:04 PM   #6
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I think any time your not with your "Dream" partner your selling yourself short.
Stephen Stills would disagree with you.
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Old 01-26-2009, 07:06 PM   #7
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I've dated a couple of skinnier men in the past, and I have to admit they did nothing for me. I was sexually frustrated all the time. To go with that, they were total JERKS, If they had been decent guys with personality then that would have been a different thing all together.

Now I never have to worry about this issue. I've found the BHM I want to spend the rest of my life with of whom I'm attracted to in everyway.. Mentally, personality wise and asthetically.

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Old 01-26-2009, 07:08 PM   #8
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I've dated a couple of skinnier men in the past, and I have to admit they did nothing for me. I was sexually frustrated all the time. To go with that, they were total JERKS, If they had been decent guys with personality then that would have been a different thing all together.

Now I never have to worry about this issue. I've found the BHM I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Ahhh btw whens the wedding??
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So shall we recap this pathetic life?
I'll role the clip, you'll hold the knife.
Rewind back to when you cared,
then fast-forward to the scars we bare.
And we'll open our eyes to find everything's fading.
Reckon it's fatal, but just look at the ratings.
Because the populace indulges through TV screens,
TiVo the laughter and mute the screams.
Thus we bottle all our tears inside,
repress the pain till our hearts collide...
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Old 01-26-2009, 07:09 PM   #9
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Ahhh btw whens the wedding??
We are hoping May. I can't wait
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Old 01-26-2009, 07:11 PM   #10
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We are hoping May. I can't wait
Aww too bad youre overseas...I would love to have been part of such a beautiful union
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So shall we recap this pathetic life?
I'll role the clip, you'll hold the knife.
Rewind back to when you cared,
then fast-forward to the scars we bare.
And we'll open our eyes to find everything's fading.
Reckon it's fatal, but just look at the ratings.
Because the populace indulges through TV screens,
TiVo the laughter and mute the screams.
Thus we bottle all our tears inside,
repress the pain till our hearts collide...
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Old 01-26-2009, 10:00 PM   #11
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I have dated skinny and chubby and skinny does nothing for me sexually - and if there is no sexual tension they are just friends in the end!

My guy was thinner when we started dating BUT he loves eating, so I got to enjoy that. I would love him thin or thick but he groans (half heartedly now) that he will never lose his water wings (love handles) around me.

Its funny, before I met him i dreamed of his body type, nice and chubby as my dream guy.

Don't settle, but don't let some FUN relationships pass you by either!
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Old 01-27-2009, 06:57 AM   #12
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My dating days are over, as I’m now engaged to the sexiest, most amazing man I’ve ever met *gushes, but when I was still on the market, I dated men of all sizes. The thinner ones were usually chosen based on personality and often had pretty faces, so they weren’t horrible or anything – just didn’t really do it for me. That’s cool though, since everyone needs to go through a weeding out phase where they narrow down the qualities that they absolutely need in a partner.

By the time I got to my current man, I was totally aware of what I wanted…and he had it! He is brilliant, hilarious, loving, has excellent taste in every form of media, as well as clothing, he’s hygienic, extremely tall, has a perfect face and meets my squishiness requirements (yes, eventually a range of equally-acceptable body types became obvious).

Anyway, IF I was still dating, I would probably never date another skinny guy simply because I’ve learned that his body just isn’t sexually appealing, and that can end up causing huge problems later on, as well as totally overshadowing his positive traits.
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Old 01-27-2009, 07:02 AM   #13
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I don't think you're a bad person for knowing what you want. I dated a skinny guy and while it was fun some of the time, there was always that frustration that he physically wasn't *enough.* Not to sound mean, but that's what it was-- I felt like all my meals were delicious but tiny and too infrequent.
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Old 01-27-2009, 07:20 AM   #14
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Originally Posted by Love.Metal View Post
My boyfriend IS skinny...I went from dating a 350lb. BHM *drools* to dating a normal, 150lb. guy.

It's a helluva transition, but personality and morals win out over physicality.


Oh, but I do totally have an obese imaginary boyfriend.
He's effin' hot.

<3
I have an obese imaginary boyfriend too!! He's my Jiminy. (it's funny cuz Chris hates Jiminy so much, he's just that real.).




But on another note... to answer the question... I've dated many thin guys before for personality, but personality doesn't cut it all the time.

My ex boyfriend Graham was a sponsored mountain biker, a sound engineer, a multi-millionare, and eccentrically intelligent to boot. But he was fit. No matter how much my mind loved him, and no matter how well we worked together... I was sexually starved.
After all, as an FFA, there was no way I could completely ignore my instincts and just pretend I didn't need a fatter man to be happy.
So, I ended up leaving him, for Chris.

It's funny, I got sick of dating men for their personalities, so when I turned 18, I purposely went out to look for a fat man. I waited for a while too... cuz I wasn't going to lie and join these sites before I turned 18 (hense why I joined on my 18th birthday). So now my birthday is also my dimensions anniversary... I'm a goof.
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Old 01-27-2009, 07:39 AM   #15
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I have much versatility in my taste and also in bed. So with an open mind i can date a lot of the guys.
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Old 01-27-2009, 07:40 AM   #16
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I am generally attracted to older, fatter women and used to date them exclusively but I have been with a younger, thinner male for almost a year now and it is the most stable loving relationship I have ever had. I was so besotted with his personality that I would have been okay with the idea of having a celibate relationship. The physical attraction did come later, which was a pleasant surprise since we didn't actually expect that.

However, as much as I love him, I don't think I can deal with it if he actually looks and acts male because that is too much of a turn-off. So yes, I can be with someone who isn't "my type" but it has to be someone I am at worst neutral about, and they definitely have to make up for it in other ways.

I don't have an imaginary big girlfriend, but I occasionally poke at his balls and tell him how good it might be if he had been born female.

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Old 01-27-2009, 08:01 AM   #17
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Been with all types - I absolutely love men.

Although fat is my ultimate preference.
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Old 01-27-2009, 09:55 AM   #18
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I don't think I've ever done "skinny", but last year I dated a really athletic jock-type guy. He was easily the 'best' guy I've had in terms of personality and knowing how to treat a girl, but his body did less than nothing for me, which really sucked. There was a brief period where his coach told him he had to gain at least 50 pounds to keep playing football, and I was ridiculously excited. Then he decided to quit football instead. Then I broke up with him...not for that exact reason, but it certainly didn't help haha. After that I promised myself not to be with anyone I wasn't attracted to, which means I don't think I've even looked twice at a guy who wasn't at least chubby in a loooong time.
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Old 01-27-2009, 02:50 PM   #19
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Curses, can’t rep any of the posts that I want to rep!

Mary-Antoinette, I love how non-random your story is. Cool to see how your mind works.

Cors: for some reason your post had me all but giggling, especially that last bit! I shouldn’t laugh at what is a real and true quandary, but the mental image is just too funny. Although just how he’s avoided “looking male” for all of this time I don’t know, that must take some talent!

Cammy: I love how succinct that is. Great to see someone who has it worked out that clearly
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Old 01-27-2009, 04:21 PM   #20
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Cors: for some reason your post had me all but giggling, especially that last bit! I shouldn’t laugh at what is a real and true quandary, but the mental image is just too funny. Although just how he’s avoided “looking male” for all of this time I don’t know, that must take some talent!
He doesn't have to try I guess. Exceptionally pale, thin, somewhat delicate features, minimal blond soft body hair and shaved everywhere else. I do love androgynous and butch women so its not too much of a stretch. ;D
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Old 01-27-2009, 05:00 PM   #21
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That does not at all make you a bad person!! Everybody has preferences, and you really can't help that. I understand that dating is not about imagining a "perfect" person and then seeking that person out, shooting everyone down who doesn't fit your requirements - but it's also not about dating people you're completely unattracted to just because you feel bad about those preferences.

And in response to your question - yes, I have dated slim guys, and it was alright. I found I just prefer heavier guys, but I never would have known that if I hadn't dated different types!
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Old 01-27-2009, 08:38 PM   #22
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Have I? yes
Would I again? no
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Old 01-27-2009, 10:36 PM   #23
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I think thin guys can be sexy and good-looking, and I've dated a few in my time--hell, my TV crush is Spike from Buffy, and he's all about the angular--but they're sexy in a different, more generalised way for me than fat guys.

p
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Old 01-28-2009, 02:03 PM   #24
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I have dated thin guys and I have dated heavier guys.

I vastly prefer BHMs. My first really great sexual experience was with a BHM and I guess I was chasing that ever since, until I met my current guy.

Perhaps it was my failing in choosing the wrong type of person, but it just seemed like every skinny guy I was with before was a closet FA. They'd be just fine with us in private, but around other people, they just didn't want to fess up. Then I was with an out and out FA for 7 years (my ex husband), but he was rather controlling and boring at the same time. We just didn't match at all and he was not skinny, but not BHM either.

I have to say following my heart and dating a BHM has made me a much happier lady and welcoming a 3rd into our relationship, a BBW, has made me even more joyful.
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Old 01-30-2009, 09:25 PM   #25
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Originally Posted by persimmon View Post
I think thin guys can be sexy and good-looking, and I've dated a few in my time--hell, my TV crush is Spike from Buffy, and he's all about the angular--but they're sexy in a different, more generalised way for me than fat guys.

p
I think they can be insanely sexy. Spike - agreed!

But when I think about me actually being with him in bed, I'll pass. It just doesn't do anything for me.

On another note, I'm finding myself incredibly attracted to a guy that had his stomach stapled. Mind you, he somehow managed to gain back some weight even with his surgery. He's at 260 now.

I *should* be frustrated that he can't eat a lot, but I find his current weight completely attractive. I'm so confused. Generally I'd shoot for over 300, but I can't get this guy out of my mind.

I know he's never going to have abs so perhaps that's a consolation, but I wouldn't even mind it if he dropped some more weight. (Not that I'd encourage it of course!)

Either way, I'm completely boggled by my latest object of every wet dream.
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