Flaunting your fat.

[Silver Fox]

I guess you could chalk it up to laziness and a lack of willpower. But knowing how I am about certain things, it is not so simple. Each of us has insided us something which causes us to either do things we wish we wouldn't or prevents us from doing things we wish we would. After dealing with this for 55 years, I understand it fairly well.

Yes, technically she could have lost the weight on her own. She did it in the past and lost over 50 pounds. But of course she gained it all back and then some in about a year. And she has tried several times since. Sometimes she would lose a noticeable amount and sometimes just a little and of course each itme gain it back plus a little more. Each time she'd go on a diet I knew how it would end up so I was never concerned and looked forward to the additional weight whe would no doubt gain.

But of course this is much different. Her surgery was Wednesday morning. She hasn't eaten anything since dinner Tuesday night and it is now Saturday morning. She has had some Jello, chicken broth and a popscicle, but that's it. She will be on a liquid diet for at least two weeks and then gradually introduce solid food. The doctor estimated that the capacity of her stomach is around 300cc now. She had what is called a "Gastric Sleeve" procedure in which they remove most of the stomach leaving basically just a long tube.

There is a possibility that this could end up backfiring on her though. There is a chance that she could stretch it out some again and actually gain all the weight back. I know full well that it is her own body and she has the right to do with it what she wants, but from my own selfish point of view I hope she does gain it all back and more. I am still angry about this and am not sure how this is going to play out. We've been married for 8 years and it has been mostly very good until this.

I'm sorry to bore everyone with this, but I have no one to talk to this about. Her mother came to stay with us to help take care of her post op. The only way my wife was able to have this surgery in the first place is her parents offered to pay for it so I am not too fond of them right now.

This just sucks!

[KHayes666]

Originally Posted by Silver Fox

I guess you could chalk it up to laziness and a lack of willpower. But knowing how I am about certain things, it is not so simple. Each of us has insided us something which causes us to either do things we wish we wouldn't or prevents us from doing things we wish we would. After dealing with this for 55 years, I understand it fairly well.

Yes, technically she could have lost the weight on her own. She did it in the past and lost over 50 pounds. But of course she gained it all back and then some in about a year. And she has tried several times since. Sometimes she would lose a noticeable amount and sometimes just a little and of course each itme gain it back plus a little more. Each time she'd go on a diet I knew how it would end up so I was never concerned and looked forward to the additional weight whe would no doubt gain.

But of course this is much different. Her surgery was Wednesday morning. She hasn't eaten anything since dinner Tuesday night and it is now Saturday morning. She has had some Jello, chicken broth and a popscicle, but that's it. She will be on a liquid diet for at least two weeks and then gradually introduce solid food. The doctor estimated that the capacity of her stomach is around 300cc now. She had what is called a "Gastric Sleeve" procedure in which they remove most of the stomach leaving basically just a long tube.

There is a possibility that this could end up backfiring on her though. There is a chance that she could stretch it out some again and actually gain all the weight back. I know full well that it is her own body and she has the right to do with it what she wants, but from my own selfish point of view I hope she does gain it all back and more. I am still angry about this and am not sure how this is going to play out. We've been married for 8 years and it has been mostly very good until this.

I'm sorry to bore everyone with this, but I have no one to talk to this about. Her mother came to stay with us to help take care of her post op. The only way my wife was able to have this surgery in the first place is her parents offered to pay for it so I am not too fond of them right now.

This just sucks!

I wouldn't wish your wife to gain the weight back, the same way I hope my formerly 340 pound friend doesn't gain it all back. Because they had this procedure, their stomach systems are now much more fragile now and eating the wrong things could lead to something worse.

If you're this unhappy in your marriage I suggest you seek help immediately. You and your wife got married because you connect with each other, not just in the bedroom but in books, movies, music, places to go, etc. If you can't sit and watch a movie with her because she lost weight, that's not her fault.

Again, sorry to be blunt but its just weight....she's still the same person inside.

[Amarillowave]

I have a tuxedo that i bought when I had a 32" waist. Now that I have a 36" waist, whenever I put it on, the bulge over the waistband is significant. I was a bit embarrassed at first, but now, other than having to suck it in so much, i kind of like it.

[nottobig]

I dated a woman, a bit plump, but with an absolutely sexy large hips. As you might suppose from the way I said that, I thought she was hot, and her figure magnificent.

She informed me she was planning to have lipo on her hips, butt, etc. and how much she was looking forward to being "normal". I found this bothered me greatly, and stopped dating her.

Refecting on it, it was not that I felt my opinion should count, but more that she hated a physical feature that I liked so much. The contrast in value/opinion was much bigger (pardon the pun) than the physical issue.

I think it is something that I would handle better today, but it would probably still break the relationship. Of course, we had been dating for a while but not engaged or married, so those relationship bonds were not so strong.

[Weirdo890]

Originally Posted by vermillion

i like to show off my fatty arms
i am no stranger to being sleeveless or that tight little capped sleeves that pinch your fat together...

here's a pretty typical shirt for me...

VA Va Vooom! Hot to the nth degree.

[tjw1971]

I mean, there are what? 4 billion people plus on this planet to choose from? So why settle for someone who you'd find that frustrating?!

It's really not about (or shouldn't be about) whether or not the woman "valued your opinion" of what's attractive on her body ...

But like you say, it's simply a case where she made it *clear* that she has a strong DISLIKE for the very things you LIKE about her looks. Sometimes I think this is a sad commentary on society as a whole; We're so concerned about looking as much like "everyone else" as possible, we don't stop to consider that the real beauty is in what makes us DIFFERENT.

Originally Posted by nottobig

I dated a woman, a bit plump, but with an absolutely sexy large hips. As you might suppose from the way I said that, I thought she was hot, and her figure magnificent.

She informed me she was planning to have lipo on her hips, butt, etc. and how much she was looking forward to being "normal". I found this bothered me greatly, and stopped dating her.

Refecting on it, it was not that I felt my opinion should count, but more that she hated a physical feature that I liked so much. The contrast in value/opinion was much bigger (pardon the pun) than the physical issue.

I think it is something that I would handle better today, but it would probably still break the relationship. Of course, we had been dating for a while but not engaged or married, so those relationship bonds were not so strong.

[Russ2d]

Originally Posted by nottobig

I dated a woman, a bit plump, but with an absolutely sexy large hips. As you might suppose from the way I said that, I thought she was hot, and her figure magnificent.

She informed me she was planning to have lipo on her hips, butt, etc. and how much she was looking forward to being "normal". I found this bothered me greatly, and stopped dating her.

Refecting on it, it was not that I felt my opinion should count, but more that she hated a physical feature that I liked so much. The contrast in value/opinion was much bigger (pardon the pun) than the physical issue.

I think it is something that I would handle better today, but it would probably still break the relationship. Of course, we had been dating for a while but not engaged or married, so those relationship bonds were not so strong.

I would have stopped dating her too. If the person you're with doesn't value your opinions, needs, wants, desires than they are not worth being with. I think FAs really need to learn this and stop thinking of themselves as "along for the ride" or irrelevant somehow and that it's all about her. I think maybe a workshop for FAs not settling in a relationship may be needed at a future bash.

[bigjayne66]

I am still trying to take it all in,my late husband never commented on my size,either positive or negative,I was 140lbs when we married and around 200-210 when he passed away in august 2003,save for a brief encounter two years ago have been alone since,It would take a lot of persuading that I could be sexy looking at my current size .

[KuroBara]

Originally Posted by nottobig

I dated a woman, a bit plump, but with an absolutely sexy large hips. As you might suppose from the way I said that, I thought she was hot, and her figure magnificent.

She informed me she was planning to have lipo on her hips, butt, etc. and how much she was looking forward to being "normal". I found this bothered me greatly, and stopped dating her.

Refecting on it, it was not that I felt my opinion should count, but more that she hated a physical feature that I liked so much. The contrast in value/opinion was much bigger (pardon the pun) than the physical issue.

I think it is something that I would handle better today, but it would probably still break the relationship. Of course, we had been dating for a while but not engaged or married, so those relationship bonds were not so strong.

I am only wondering, since the post does not say, did you let your GF know that you loved her hips and she was the kind of "normal" you wanted? I'm not saying that would have changed her mind, since once a person hates something about themselves, it takes a near miracle to change her/his mind, but it may have had some effect.

[Green Eyed Fairy]

Originally Posted by KuroBara

I am only wondering, since the post does not say, did you let your GF know that you loved her hips and she was the kind of "normal" you wanted? I'm not saying that would have changed her mind, since once a person hates something about themselves, it takes a near miracle to change her/his mind, but it may have had some effect.

I had to wonder, too, if he told her exactly why he was breaking it off or if he left her confused.

[jason'sgottenfat]

Originally Posted by vermillion

i like to show off my fatty arms
i am no stranger to being sleeveless or that tight little capped sleeves that pinch your fat together...

here's a pretty typical shirt for me...

you are pretty gorgeous,...when I am back home in WA we should hang out!
Jason

[fatcow3h]

i love to flaunt my little belly, especially at ball games and outdoor activiites.

[KHayes666]

Originally Posted by fatcow3h

i love to flaunt my little belly, especially at ball games and outdoor activiites.

that's wonderful, confidence is always a good thing :-)

[FAinPA]

i love to flaunt my little belly, especially at ball games and outdoor activiites.

That's where we get the most excited about being fat show-offs! As evidenced by this photo of mrs. fainpa at Dover Speedway on a beautiful June afternoon. Oh, the tailgating from sun-up to sun-down. Filling the bellies and exposing them!

[jennam]

My dream would be to hang out with a bunch of other gainers/feedees--and go out for dinner in snug revealing clothes! Maybe someday.

[Tracii]

Love tight clothes on a fattie!!!

[jennam]

Originally Posted by Tracii

Love tight clothes on a fattie!!!

Oooooo...I love it that I am even considered a fattie! I'm a fat girl in tight clothes.... I love the way that sounds and makes me feel!

[Never2fat4me]

Originally Posted by jennam

My dream would be to hang out with a bunch of other gainers/feedees--and go out for dinner in snug revealing clothes! Maybe someday.

Would be totally awsome to see you go out in a too-tight tube top (say that five times fast! ) and some cut-off jeans and watch the jiggling fat flow over the top!

[KHayes666]

Originally Posted by jennam

My dream would be to hang out with a bunch of other gainers/feedees--and go out for dinner in snug revealing clothes! Maybe someday.

We used to hold meetups in Long Island....maybe we should do that again lol

[SuperGuyver]

Sounds like an amazing encounter.I often checkout ssbbws at the shnucks down from my house.I also had a strange encounter with a women who mistakened me for a girl and even muttered under her breath"That girl really should layoff the donuts".I got "excited" there at the store.That was about 5 weeks ago.

[imfree]

Originally Posted by vermillion

i like to show off my fatty arms
i am no stranger to being sleeveless or that tight little capped sleeves that pinch your fat together...

here's a pretty typical shirt for me...

Originally Posted by AlethaBBW

Ohhh yeah, you are one hot little slurp, girlie.

I pretty much never wear sleeves anymore. I let the arm rolls greet the world each day.

You're both beautiful and just exude huggability.

[KHayes666]

Originally Posted by SuperGuyver

Sounds like an amazing encounter.I often checkout ssbbws at the shnucks down from my house.I also had a strange encounter with a women who mistakened me for a girl and even muttered under her breath"That girl really should layoff the donuts".I got "excited" there at the store.That was about 5 weeks ago.

Congrats on recognizing the one year anniversary of when this thread originally died.

[louisaml]

I didn't really flaunt it until I moved up to NH and started hanging out with the right people. I flaunt it whenever I can now. I don't care what people think. I get lots of compliments and I loves it. I even bought a bikini for the summer. I would love to flaunt it more, but it has been so darn cold up here. I am still stuck in hoodies and sweatpants. I just bought a kickin summer wardrobe of tube tops and dresses, see the fashion thread. I cant wait to get to 350-400 and show off my body in a tube top and mini skirt. If thin women can get away with it then so can I. Fat seas ahoy.

[chaoticfate13]

i find that even though i don mean to my belly seems to be on display all the time. im just not ready to give up some of my more awesome looking tshirts.
my belly was hanging out 3 times today. once i was reaching for something and my whole belly came pouring out at the store. i dont know if anyone say but if they did they got a nice stretchmarked show.

[Weirdo890]

You guys have more courage than I do. I just can't bring myself to show myself like that in public. I haven't reached that level of self-acceptance yet. That and it's still cold here.