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Old 04-17-2009, 04:18 AM   #1
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Default Fat as a compliment?

I was at a wedding last weekend and my friend that i hadn't seen for a while said "you look georgous with that bit of extra weight on you". I totally took this as a compliment of course! I began to wonder if maby i took this as a compliment because i am an Fa and that other women might not have. You hear people trying to compliment people all the time by asking them if they have lost weight. Has anyone been complimented (by a non Fa) by anything to do with fat/weight/curves.
hmm.. should this be on the 'weight board'? I'm not turned on..promise!
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Old 04-17-2009, 04:37 AM   #2
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Cool Sweet Thread.

Nothing to contribute, unfortunately, but I'm very excited to hear what others say! Great idea, mergirl.
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Old 04-17-2009, 05:15 AM   #3
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That was definitely a compliment. I have met people who are not strictly fat admirers but can see beauty beyond the bounds of what the rest of the world have been brainwashed into accepting as beautiful. There are just some people who look better fat and for me its just plain common sense to see that and compliment them for it. I've been complimented in that people say I look beautiful etc but, and I spose its cos I'm very fat, I've never had a non-FA tell me the fat looks good. The compliments are always about my face, hair, clothes, outfit etc, never - oh, that weight suits you.
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Old 04-17-2009, 05:43 AM   #4
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I almost always get complimented on weight gain by non-FAs, though I don't like ANY weight-related comment at all. I am underweight though, if that makes a difference.
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Old 04-17-2009, 06:22 AM   #5
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hmm.. this makes me wonder if the compliments are dependent on your actual size. I think geography has a lot to do with things too. hmm the guy who complemented me was gay.. so there wern't any sexual undertones in regards to my awsome heaving bousums either!
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Old 04-17-2009, 08:11 AM   #6
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I've never had the balls to say this to a woman. I say it to my GF, rarely, and she barely lets me get away with it. Worse, I've felt compelled to compliment people on losing weight because I thought it was what they wanted/needed to hear.
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Old 04-17-2009, 10:56 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by tres huevos View Post
I've never had the balls to say this to a woman. I say it to my GF, rarely, and she barely lets me get away with it. Worse, I've felt compelled to compliment people on losing weight because I thought it was what they wanted/needed to hear.
Yeah, i started a thread on that last week, about how i feel compelled to say 'oh, have you lost weight?' when really it doesnt matter. Its funny though, I REALLY did take it as a complement..though i'm not sure a lot of women would..
I never say to a women 'oh, you look great, you've gained weight!" cause i dont want them to freak out and lose it all! lmao
wow. i am such a horror i never even realised!
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Old 04-17-2009, 11:28 AM   #8
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I'm a paysite model who dates FAs so I get complemented on fat all the time. I genuinely receive it as a compliment at this point though once or twice I've had to wonder. I was in a drug store not too long ago and there was a guy walking in my direction down the aisle. His eyes grew wide when he saw me and he said, "Whoa, big mamma!" I couldn't read how he meant it so I just didn't say anything. Happened to me in Germany once too. I wasn't sure how to read it, could have come from any place. A transient perhaps?
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Old 04-17-2009, 11:39 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by LillyBBBW View Post
I'm a paysite model who dates FAs so I get complemented on fat all the time. I genuinely receive it as a compliment at this point though once or twice I've had to wonder. I was in a drug store not too long ago and there was a guy walking in my direction down the aisle. His eyes grew wide when he saw me and he said, "Whoa, big mamma!" I couldn't read how he meant it so I just didn't say anything. Happened to me in Germany once too. I wasn't sure how to read it, could have come from any place. A transient perhaps?
oh whooat really?? yeah..it must be hard to know how to actually take a comment like that?! Its funny that some people just 'say' stuff like that. It either means they are totally turned on and can't control themselves or they are a bit backward and can't control themselves. Either way to make any comment on someones body like that indicates some sort of lack of self control.
I thought calling someone 'mamma' was an American thing for ages then my gf said that some kids called her that. I also thought it was a comment reserved for black people and slightly racist, but my gf is white white and she was called it. i have no idea. people are mental!
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Old 04-17-2009, 11:58 AM   #10
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This maybe a little off the original thought but ...one time I was at Niagara Falls and I was sitting under a shade tree listening to the sound of the falls when a bus load of Japanese people got out of the bus and came straight over to me started taking pictures and posing around me like I was a statue..they didn't speak English and I got pissed really fast but couldn't get up because it would have made them take more pics..so I gave them the international sign for there photos..I gave them the finger..that's all I knew to do..it was the craziest thing that has happened to me concerning my weight and reactions in public
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Old 04-17-2009, 12:02 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by tres huevos View Post
I've never had the balls to say this to a woman. I say it to my GF, rarely, and she barely lets me get away with it. Worse, I've felt compelled to compliment people on losing weight because I thought it was what they wanted/needed to hear.
girls i've dated/been with in the past have received my compliments for being fat. i.e. "i love the feel of your fat" or "you are fat and lovely," etc.
the girls i have been with have grown to get used to, and even like hearing these things
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Old 04-17-2009, 12:03 PM   #12
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I almost always get complimented on weight gain by non-FAs, though I don't like ANY weight-related comment at all. I am underweight though, if that makes a difference.
probably? maybe they think you look better with a fleshier form, and that's perfectly okay
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Old 04-17-2009, 12:05 PM   #13
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This maybe a little off the original thought but ...one time I was at Niagara Falls and I was sitting under a shade tree listening to the sound of the falls when a bus load of Japanese people got out of the bus and came straight over to me started taking pictures and posing around me like I was a statue..they didn't speak English and I got pissed really fast but couldn't get up because it would have made them take more pics..so I gave them the international sign for there photos..I gave them the finger..that's all I knew to do..it was the craziest thing that has happened to me concerning my weight and reactions in public
Oh yeah.. i have heard this happening. My ex lived in hong kong for a year, when she was younger and while she wasnt fat at the time she was a bit chubby. She said it was kinna freaky because she was like 13 and all these guys were staring at her tits on the train. They just hadn't seen that many people with curves, so it was really special or something. Anyway, they loved it..which was kinna creepy, seeing my ex was 13 at the time. (when i went out with her she was 27 btw..just so you know! lol)
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Old 04-17-2009, 12:07 PM   #14
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probably? maybe they think you look better with a fleshier form, and that's perfectly okay
Yeah, but if she doesnt like people talking about her weight its not ok.. I know what your saying though, that some people might think someone looks better when they are fatter.. but, some people just dont want people talking about their weight either way..i can get that too.
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Old 04-17-2009, 12:18 PM   #15
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oh whooat really?? yeah..it must be hard to know how to actually take a comment like that?! Its funny that some people just 'say' stuff like that. It either means they are totally turned on and can't control themselves or they are a bit backward and can't control themselves. Either way to make any comment on someones body like that indicates some sort of lack of self control.
I thought calling someone 'mamma' was an American thing for ages then my gf said that some kids called her that. I also thought it was a comment reserved for black people and slightly racist, but my gf is white white and she was called it. i have no idea. people are mental!
When I was younger and just beginning to develope as a woman I was full figured a la "Anna Nicole Smith" full figured. For me it was a horrific time because I was developing early and was still a littel girl mentally yet I had guys cat calling and wolf whistling all the time. I liked the way I looked but having guys be so forward and aggressive totally scared the shit out of me. The world is full of rude apes who don't care at all about social graces. I still get them eeevery once in a while, most especially in black community settings but rarely do I hear someone point directly at teh fat. The come ons are usually generalized. That's why with those two 'big mamma' comments I wondered. Mindless apes? Most definitley but it could have been meant as a compliment and not a missive.
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Old 04-17-2009, 06:37 PM   #16
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I have personally had occasion to compliment women on their size randomly in public and in the context of conversation at places like a cash register or suchlike.
Instance a) There was a woman in line ahead of me. She was a stunning not fat but soft bodied black woman with a very nice figure. She was making note to the cashier that she shouldnt be buying this item (not sure what it was right now) citing the minute on the lips, months on the hips mantra. I simply looked at her and casually remarked that "it may look good there." Her reply was something about a diet she would be crashing to whit my remark in return was " I dont see why you would want to diet, you have a beautiful figure"......she looked at the cashier with a smile, the cashier was nodding repeatedly the lady customer who smiled wider, blushed and left.

Instance b) was at an in-law relatives house. People coming and going, extending thoughtless greetings that everyone mentions but nobody really cares what the answers are. Woman one walks in and greets woman two with the offhanded wow you look good, are you losing weight? Woman two comments no, ive gained "X lbs"....my comment from the peanut gallery? "It looks good on you" Woman one harumphs and carries on woman two smiles and thanks me.

There are instances where those compliments can make a persons day. Im kinda out there a bit as an FA and I take chances when they arise. The catch is that if not worded correctly the person gets offended badly but, a vague compliment of form or figure in the right situation makes two people feel good; the complimenter, and the complimentee.

I always figured after seeing all the posts about how to find FAs, that we should make a presence in public in much the same way that thin lovers do complimenting the skinny minnies. The catch is finding the right situations to do so. I figure what the hell, take a chance, the smile and blush is worth it.
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Old 04-18-2009, 03:18 AM   #17
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I think that most of the time you can tell whether its a compliment or not. I have a long time friend who told me quite a while ago that he loves my fat, and it surprised me because I'd never had anyone sincerely tell me that before. Usually people say it sarchastically to me (or just talk behind their back), and its very obvious they're just being assholes. But I didn't question his sincerity for a minute, and it really did make my day. Theres a point where its just really nice to hear, but if it goes overboard it can be really crap.

And collared princess, that story was really sad to read I wish people would consider that we all have feelings first before treating you that way
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Old 04-18-2009, 07:25 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by tres huevos View Post
I've never had the balls to say this to a woman. I say it to my GF, rarely, and she barely lets me get away with it. Worse, I've felt compelled to compliment people on losing weight because I thought it was what they wanted/needed to hear.
I kind of feel the same way. I don't know if I ever personally met a woman beside my wife who would be comfortable hearing "wow, you gained weight, you look so good!!". For me it's a sincere compliment. I really feel weird saying the opposite because that's not what I think, but 90% of women I know want to hear that.

It's also weird how it's considered impolite to even say it in third person, like "she gained a lot of weight, she looks awesome"... I wish society was more open.
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:28 AM   #19
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I've had some fat compliments from women only not from guys.
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Old 04-18-2009, 10:13 AM   #20
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I was at a wedding last weekend and my friend that i hadn't seen for a while said "you look georgous with that bit of extra weight on you". I totally took this as a compliment of course! I began to wonder if maby i took this as a compliment because i am an Fa and that other women might not have. You hear people trying to compliment people all the time by asking them if they have lost weight. Has anyone been complimented (by a non Fa) by anything to do with fat/weight/curves.
hmm.. should this be on the 'weight board'? I'm not turned on..promise!
I'm 7 months pregnant and have probably gained about 10-12 pounds. A couple of weeks ago, one of my male co-workers said, "Wow Jen, you're finally getting big and wide." I was horrified LOL. He said, "That was a compliment....you're supposed to get fat when you're pregnant!" I didn't take it as a compliment...and he didn't get the hint LOL. Yesterday he said, "I can't wait until you get a belly!" He's definitely a non-FA, but I'm pretty sure that pregnancy weight turns him on
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Old 04-18-2009, 07:08 PM   #21
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I've gotten the occasional "you carry yourself so well at your size" I don't think that's particularly nice- How about "you carry yourself so well."?
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Old 04-20-2009, 04:47 PM   #22
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I was at a wedding last weekend and my friend that i hadn't seen for a while said "you look georgous with that bit of extra weight on you". I totally took this as a compliment of course! I began to wonder if maby i took this as a compliment because i am an Fa and that other women might not have. You hear people trying to compliment people all the time by asking them if they have lost weight. Has anyone been complimented (by a non Fa) by anything to do with fat/weight/curves.
hmm.. should this be on the 'weight board'? I'm not turned on..promise!
it depends on the person, their size and how they feel about it. Personally, if someone said to me, wow you look great, you've put on loads of weight. I would not be impressed. This is because I don't want to be bigger or look like I have gained weight. In the same breath I hate people saying, " you look great, have you lost weight" because they think I'll be flattered or pleased to hear that. If this happens when I haven't lost weight or even put weight on then I know the other person is saying that because they think I'll be pleased and they probably don't think I look any different. I have a friend who does this and it drives me mental. Why not just say you look great and let size be irrelevant?

By the way Mer, your pal thought you looked great because you looked great, he saw the weight as a positive thing because you were wearing a dress and looked very feminine and you were showing cleavage. You were dressed up for a wedding and looked lovely, some people think when you lose weight you look ill. Not you personally, people in general. However you had lost weight when you were ill and so he probs associated the two, you were fuller figured and looked healthy and glowing. Gorgeous woman that you are xx
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Old 04-20-2009, 05:02 PM   #23
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Definitely dependent on who's saying it and their overall tone/intention.


Although I don't see why it's any different than the millions who feel fine offering up the "you look great, you've lost weight!" which is said to me a lot and I find it completely annoying and obnoxious. It's like a roving assumption that that is something I'd want to hear as if I'm some societal teet-sucker who is just dying for that type of validation.

I realize they can't help but think I'd drink from that fountain - but I don't, and being lumped in with those who do drives me up a wall. Especially when any loss I've had is due to health-necessitated diet changes, or not really any loss at all. It's like the "throw the fat girl a bone" line that people pull out.

Blegh.
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Old 04-20-2009, 05:05 PM   #24
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I've never had a non-FA comment on a gain as a positive thing, but I have had a small number of people tell me I look attractive at a certain size. Generally, this was when I was more in the 220-250 range though as opposed to the 330 I'm at now.
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Old 04-22-2009, 03:11 PM   #25
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This really only happened to me once... My older brother is completely obsessed with his body and his body image. He's had lipo a few times, and goes to the gym every siiiingle day. He's really fat phobic (to both people and any fat on his own body).

Anyway, I only get to see him a few times a year, and once in between visits, I put on probably 40 lbs. Much to my surprise, he told me I actually looked better. That the weight "filled me out" and that I looked "more proportional." Now, this probably sounds strange to people who don't know my brother and possibly not like a compliment at all, but it was. And I was shocked.
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