Dimensions Forums  
Home Register Premium Membership Stories Ye Olde Library Health Issues Market Place Big Fashion

Go Back   Dimensions Forums > Discussion > BBW Forum



Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 07-08-2009, 06:43 AM   #26
Tania
Disneyland Bobsled Team
 
Tania's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: The corner of Small World Mall & Matterhorn Way.
Posts: 1,975
Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tania has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tau View Post
focus on real flesh and blood men. I surprised and pretty badly hurt myself by falling in love this year. It took me by surprise and it sometimes it hurts so badly its like somebody's burnt all my insides up, but its real.
I feel this. I also totally get where the OP is coming from.

After a crappy, unfulfilling marriage I spent a couple of years buried in what I like to call my "fat, ugly, unwanted girl hole." It hurt to watch others moving on with their romantic lives while I had nothing... and worse, felt that I wasn't pretty enough anymore to deserve what I wanted. So, I threw myself into writing romances (instead of reading them). If only I'd had Dims back then to help me reorient my perceptions!

Gradually, I was able to lose much of the weight and regain some of my lost self-assurance. For the past year or so I've kept myself out there and dated a crudload of guys. It's done wonders for my confidence - now I feel worthy and desired again, which is a complete 180 from where I was at in late 2003. I've also learned that I'm not the cold fish I once thought I was - I *can* love. This transformation hasn't been without its tribulations, though - several months ago I dated a man for whom I fell completely. Things didn't work out and it damn near broke me, but I know that it's worth the continual risk to keep looking for love. Not everyone shares this belief, but I feel that if there's no hope for love, there's no hope for life. I can't give up.
__________________
You're such a strange girl
I think you come from another world

~ The Cure

"She will never submit to any thing requiring industry and patience, and a subjection of the fancy to the understanding."
~ Mr. Knightley on Emma, Jane Austen's Emma
Tania is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2009, 11:57 AM   #27
Teresa
Abundantly Corpulent
 
Teresa's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Southern Virginia
Posts: 124
Teresa does more than just post hot picsTeresa does more than just post hot picsTeresa does more than just post hot pics
Default

Thanks Tau and Tania. Great responses and good advice.

There HAS been a lot of good advice all through out this thread and I've taken it. Gotten out there, dated some and had alot of fun. I appreciate all those who've taken the time to respond to my original post with openness and heartfelt advice.

Teresa
__________________
"Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?"
Teresa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2009, 04:02 PM   #28
SweetNYLady
Immutable Dreamer
 
SweetNYLady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: New York, just north of NYC in Westchester County
Posts: 197
SweetNYLady can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesSweetNYLady can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default

I used to "pooh pooh" those romance/erotic stories kind of books... thought that they just weren't for me.

Now these days its the majority of what I read! LOL And yes, it does leave me quite frustrated for the lack of romance, love and pure unadulterated sexual encounters-- all of which I don't have in my life these days!

So what I do about it?... keep reading away of course! lol :-)
__________________
"Yesterdays a memory
Another page in history
You sell yourself on hopes and dreams
That leaves you feeling sideways.
Tripping over my own feet
Trying to walk to my own beat
Another car out on the street
trying to find the highway
Yeah, Are you going my way?"

-- Story of My Life by Bon Jovi

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
SweetNYLady is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-08-2009, 04:56 PM   #29
JerseyGirl07093
Stick a fork in me
 
JerseyGirl07093's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Weird NJ
Posts: 2,346
JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!JerseyGirl07093 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Victim View Post
I guess that's one good thing about being an FA. We're always willing to be weigh laid.
LMAO! Victim, you are the king of the one liners! You always crack me up.
__________________
If you can't love yourself, how in the hell are you gonna love somebody else?! - Rupaul

You're your own standard of beauty. There's no one else in the world who looks like you, so how can you compare yourself to anyone else? - Stacy London
JerseyGirl07093 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-10-2009, 09:11 AM   #30
Tau
IXAMXDECADENCE
 
Tau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posts: 1,308
Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Tania View Post
... but I feel that if there's no hope for love, there's no hope for life. I can't give up.
YES! There is no point to a life without love - and I don't just mean non-platonic either. I cannot imagine a life where I'm not constantly surrounded by love, familial, platonic, spiritual. I've actually been thinking hard about it and realise that since I could reason and make decisions for myself my every action - the good ones anyway - have been influenced by love.
__________________
"Happiness isn't enough! I demand euphoria!"
http://fiercefotography.blogspot.com/
Tau is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-11-2009, 07:02 AM   #31
Ruffie
 
Ruffie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Saskatchewan Canada
Posts: 1,703
Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!Ruffie keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I can so relate to this. Its been an adjustment in my marriage of almost 24 years. When we first got together things were great, he was attentive, adoring and sex was abundant. For the first two years we had what I thought love was all about. Then we had a baby with colic, his alcoholic parents issues came to the surface, job loss, financial worries and well lets face it life happened! We almost split up twice in these 24 years we have been together, but took our vows seriously went to get therapy and worked through things. I discovered through all this that passion waxes and wanes throughout a marriage but its the friendship type of love that holds things together.

I do admit I miss though him holding my hand, putting his arm around me, kissing me goodbye and so on. And I would like sex more often. I have discussed these things with him and he makes an attempt for a while then its back to the old patterns. So sometimes I too look at TV or movies or newly in love couples and say man I wish I had that.
__________________
Teach without expecting. Give without wanting. Nurture without possessing.
Ruffie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-12-2009, 12:23 AM   #32
katherine22
 
katherine22's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Tualatin, Oregon (near Portland)
Posts: 566
katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
I go and write my own dirty stories whenever I miss sex too much....it's a nice release really.
You have it going on Ms. Caroline. Take that passion and eros that could be spent on a man and do something creative. "We are the ones we have been waiting for."
__________________
"It's absurd to divide people into good and bad. People either or charming or tedious." Oscar Wilde

Queen Elizabeth I residing within.

If I continue to eat I will grow as big as a room.
"What are rooms for?":bow:
katherine22 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-12-2009, 02:11 PM   #33
Green Eyed Fairy
Flash Dancing
 
Green Eyed Fairy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: In Your Head
Posts: 18,067
Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.Green Eyed Fairy has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by katherine22 View Post
You have it going on Ms. Caroline. Take that passion and eros that could be spent on a man and do something creative. "We are the ones we have been waiting for."
I also like the way Atlanta Rhythm Section put it, too....

"Imaginary Lovers never let you down..."
__________________
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]


"The longing of my heart is a fairy portrait of myself: I want to be pretty; I want to eliminate facts and fill up the gap with charms."

"See these eyes so green, I can stare for a thousand years, Colder than the moon
It's been so long and I've been putting out fire with gasoline"
Green Eyed Fairy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-12-2009, 02:54 PM   #34
Just_Jen
Woot!
 
Just_Jen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Leeds, UK
Posts: 1,190
Just_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging inJust_Jen makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

I'm definately feeling what you mean. Sometimes i wonder if the reason i don't get on with men is because i have too high aspirations from reading too many of these books and falling in love with the characters.

I don't want to echo what everyone else has said and i can't really give you any other advice. It's sometimes good to have that escapism. I know now that im so lonely and there's no one that wants me and is here it gives me a place to dream and hope and live through the characters. It's just important to keep the feeling of reality when a man does come along. I feel you so hard right now haha because these books are so good and the romances so whimsical that i just want to be whisked away too.
Just_Jen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-16-2009, 09:10 AM   #35
OneHauteMama
 
OneHauteMama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Posts: 248
OneHauteMama has super-sized repOneHauteMama has super-sized repOneHauteMama has super-sized repOneHauteMama has super-sized rep
Default

Quote:
After a crappy, unfulfilling marriage I spent a couple of years buried in what I like to call my "fat, ugly, unwanted girl hole." It hurt to watch others moving on with their romantic lives while I had nothing... and worse, felt that I wasn't pretty enough anymore to deserve what I wanted.
This is exactly where I am right now. I've been out of a crappy, unfulfilling (in EVERY way) marriage since January and feeling like absolute shit about myself and what I have to offer someone else. I've gained about 20lbs since April and that hasn't helped.

I find that watching romantic movies and reading romance novels, even listening to music about love, makes me feel like crap because I know it isn't real...those things don't happen. I feel like they really skew the reality of love and relationships. The sunshine and butterflies go away when the rain comes...and you have to realize that you're not going to be all lovey-dovey all the time. Life is hard, marriage and relationships are work. But it's how you work together to get through them that determines how strong your relationship is or will continue to be.

Honestly, my ex-husband thought I wanted him to be like a leading man in a romantic comedy when all I wanted was for him to acknowledge that I was more than just a fixture in the house or someone for him to father. I don't ask for much, honestly. I don't crave fancy cars or houses or lots of money. Just hold my hand, show that you're proud to be with me, let me know I'm important to you. It's funny, but I think that's what most women want...and it's so simple, yet so hard to come by.
OneHauteMama is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:44 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright Dimensions Magazine. All rights reserved worldwide.