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Old 05-16-2009, 11:37 AM   #1
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Default The i am too fat for..............Thread

I was bored so thought this might be an interesting thread idea. Pics or descriptions. I shall go first

I am too fat for this chair
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Old 05-16-2009, 03:46 PM   #2
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Almsot anythign that's designed for recreation that has springs, such as trampolines not made specifically for added weight.
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Old 05-16-2009, 09:37 PM   #3
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I'm too fat to fly in coach comfortably. My knees are into the seat in front of me because I'm 6'5" so it cost a fortune to fly first class. So unless I can get a Midwest Express flight (all first class seats) I try to drive to where I'm going on vacation.

I'm too fat to drive my daughters car. It's a sporty little two door chevy. I can get in it and drive it, but wedging myself out of it SUCKS! I'm also going to have to sell my Viper one of these days because it's starting to kill my back hauling myself out of it.

Bit of advice - You can get fat, just don't get old. It sucks.
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:58 AM   #4
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most chairs with side arms and any "boothes" in restaurants - totally avoid them! on another note, went to get some new formal trousers over the weekend and up from a 46" to a 52" under the belly. my butt and thighs must be swelling. cool!
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Old 05-17-2009, 09:58 AM   #5
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Apparently I'm to Fat for couches. Yes I have busted 2 in under a month! I was so freaking embraced, I busted steel welding in one of them. It was worse than the time at a funeral where I busted a chair and yell out "SHIT!" when I hit the ground and it was dead quiet.
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Old 05-17-2009, 10:00 AM   #6
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I'm too fat for girls with small brains...whatever that means haha.
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Old 05-17-2009, 10:11 AM   #7
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Surfing
Pull ups
Certain Rollercoasters
pogo sticks
hang gliders
back flips or any flips for that matter
slam dunks
spelunking
narrow rope bridges
leaning back on aluminum lawn chairs from the 70's
two man luge

i'm sure there's more
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Old 05-17-2009, 10:37 AM   #8
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Originally Posted by WhiteHotRazor View Post
leaning back on aluminum lawn chairs from the 70's

HAHA. Goddamn it those things are unreliable. I am apparently too fat for those old-as-shit folding lawn chairs as well. I busted one of those last summer at a bonfire, and I think I weighed all of 130 pounds at the time.
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Old 05-17-2009, 04:22 PM   #9
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Originally Posted by escapist View Post
Apparently I'm to Fat for couches. Yes I have busted 2 in under a month! I was so freaking embraced, I busted steel welding in one of them. It was worse than the time at a funeral where I busted a chair and yell out "SHIT!" when I hit the ground and it was dead quiet.
Bye flexsteel furniture - I only buy that brand and it my friend is TOUGH! You should also get into the habit of carrying a bag chair wherever you go. The Living Large Catalog has bag chairs that can hold 800lbs. I'm 6'5" and in the high 300's and I bought one of these chairs and my feet barely touch the ground and I have all kinds of room.

A bag chair can save you from all kinds of discomfort at outdoor gatherings etc.
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Old 05-17-2009, 07:10 PM   #10
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Originally Posted by RacinJason View Post
I'm 6'5" and in the high 300's and I bought one of these chairs and my feet barely touch the ground and I have all kinds of room.
Wait...you fit in a Viper?!

I'm 6'5", 350, and would have never even thought to try one of those out for size!

Myself, I appear to be too fat for the women here in Kansas City. OTOH, I'm not too fat for a Mini Cooper.

A fair trade, I suppose.
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Old 05-18-2009, 05:49 AM   #11
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All of my medium shirts and pants at the moment. I've been TRYING to lost some chub can I can't get under 230. Now it's going UP.... 235. More things I think I'll be too fat for soon... lol!
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Old 05-18-2009, 11:16 AM   #12
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I'm to fat for many things.... chairs, I do not fit or they do not hold me; bench, forget it. On the drivers seat I fit only in some full size SUV's. To walk distances. To lay on a single bed, to get out or in the car when parallel parked... much more I can think of...
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Old 05-18-2009, 12:49 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhiteHotRazor View Post
Surfing
Pull ups
Certain Rollercoasters
pogo sticks
hang gliders
back flips or any flips for that matter
slam dunks
spelunking
narrow rope bridges
leaning back on aluminum lawn chairs from the 70's
two man luge

i'm sure there's more
Best list so far, WHR.
Anyone who can weasel "spelunking" into a conversation with such fluidity most definitely rules.

Laughed my ass off
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Old 05-18-2009, 01:04 PM   #14
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What I'm not too fat for would be a much shorter and less embarrassing list...maybe even an empty one.
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Old 05-18-2009, 08:36 PM   #15
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1. Gymnastics
2. Training in the secret and deadly ninja arts
3. Swings
4. Swing dancing
5. Water slides
6. Amusement park rides
7. Vespa motor scooters (sorry, pal!)
8. The beach (there's always a Cub scout-type that tries to push me back in the water)
9. Using a bullwhip to swing across a fiery death trap
10. Reduced-fat food products. Seriously, it's like pissing on a forest fire at this point.
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Old 05-18-2009, 08:45 PM   #16
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Ironically, I am too fat to play Wii Fit.
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Old 05-18-2009, 10:11 PM   #17
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Ironically, I am too fat to play Wii Fit.
ha ha hme too!
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Old 05-19-2009, 10:05 AM   #18
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ha ha hme too!
one of my weird aims its 150kg limit in the uk and weigh in at 139kg today up from 107kg in early 2005. i'm already off the bmi scale on the wii fit as it only goes up to 40 (lol) and mines about 52 but cant wait to break the board hopefully before 2010!!!
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Old 05-19-2009, 12:10 PM   #19
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I am too fat for the pole vault. Seriously, I haven't tried it, but I'm sure it just wouldn't work.
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Old 05-19-2009, 12:14 PM   #20
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most restaurant booths


*but it's really just a boob thing
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Old 05-19-2009, 01:49 PM   #21
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Iím too fat for the cheap step-stool we used to own (a step buckled).

Iím too fat for bike shorts to fit properly (the assumption seems to be that if you are biking and have a waist my size, you must also be about six and a half feet tall).

Iím too fat to run without at least some jiggling.

Iím almost too fat to get up one water-ski. As it is I get dragged through and at times somewhat under the water for far too many seconds before my parents boat can get up enough speed for me to get up.
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Old 05-19-2009, 02:40 PM   #22
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1.) Jogging
2.) Restaurant Boothes
3.) Doing anything on my knees
4.) Folding Chairs
5.) Plastic Chairs
6.) Store bought T-shirts
7.) 1959 Triumph TR3As
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Old 05-19-2009, 03:38 PM   #23
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I'm too fat:

1.) To run a marathon over 20 yards
2.) For some types of coitus
3.) For restaurant booths and/or those shitty McDonalds chairs that are built into the table
4.) To be considered skinny.
5.) To put up with assholes who think fat people suck
6.) To dance the Virginia Reel anymore (::sigh:: I miss Civil War reenacting)
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Old 05-19-2009, 04:58 PM   #24
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Quote:
Originally Posted by WhiteHotRazor View Post
Surfing
Pull ups
Certain Rollercoasters
pogo sticks
hang gliders
back flips or any flips for that matter
slam dunks
spelunking
narrow rope bridges
leaning back on aluminum lawn chairs from the 70's
two man luge

i'm sure there's more
Banana Flips?
Attached Images
File Type: jpg banana flip.JPG (22.3 KB, 2272 views)
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Old 05-19-2009, 05:09 PM   #25
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Banana Flips?
Hehe, I have to ask. What in the hell is a Banana Flip? A twinkie with banana cream filling?
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