Dimensions Forums  
Home Register Premium Membership Stories Ye Olde Library Health Issues Market Place Big Fashion
Old 08-09-2010, 07:24 PM   #2551
CarlaSixx
Just Another Weirdo
 
CarlaSixx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cornwall, ON, Canada
Posts: 3,983
CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by spiritangel View Post
Carla is there community theatre in your town? as that is free a great way to meet people of simmilar interests and also you may even get on stage (although sometimes takes a while of working your way up) but would be well worth looking into..............
I was part of one for two years, a french one, and there's an English one that only runs once a year. I've given up hope because the plays they put on never have characters that I can do. The french one always has old people characters (as all but 2 from the troupe are over 40) and they do not want to deal with piercings and tattoos. The English one always has ones with thin characters, like Anne of Green Gables and whatnot. I don't want to try once again because I always get the same reaction "Oh, well we don't have any roles for you, but we could always use an extra hand for makeup and costumes."



I'm SO sick of that.
__________________
Curvy Canadian ;)
Twitter
My Wish List
CarlaSixx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2010, 08:19 PM   #2552
calauria
La Negra Hermosa
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Timbuktu
Posts: 1,070
calauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
I live off 40$ a month. There really isn't anything to cut down on. But I don't have any reason to relocate other than the fact that I don't like my city and none of my friends live here anymore. I'm not able to work, so I can't just up and go anywhere. Not only that, but I don't drive, so I really cannot up and go. I mean... how many people plan a whole life change around 40$ a month? I've never heard of it in my life.

Thing is... I don't ENJOY sewing. I just learned it really quick because I had hand-me-downs that were worn out and I needed to fix them myself. The only reason I did costume design in school is because I was too fat to get a part in any of the plays. I wanted to be centre stage, but fixing up the person who was going to be centre stage was my only option.

I do NOT enjoy being a "behind the scenes" worker. I HATE making things for others and not receiving proper credit for it.
Not liking the city you live is a good enough reason to prepare to leave. Obviously, the city you live in now doesn't have what you need to have the quality of life that you want. Do you want to relocate or do you want to try to make things work there?

I'm not sure how disabitlity works in Canada. But, in a larger city where you would like to live, do they offer housing for the disabled? Also, does Canada offer disability payments? And, if so, would they allow you to work part time? Maybe you can do an internet search to see what resources are available for the disabled.
I've done all types of traveling and relocating with very little money. I'm a master at it, a master at planning it. It does take a lotof planning, focus, and perserverance, but it can be done. Plus, you don't have any children, so it would be a lot easier, once you know how to do it.

Just tell me what you want to do and I can help you find a way to get there.
__________________
I'm free to do what I want, any ole time...:p
calauria is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2010, 08:25 PM   #2553
OneWickedAngel
Untamed Woman...
 
OneWickedAngel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Noo Yawk - Noo Yawk
Posts: 4,966
OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default enough already...

IC I've heard enough bullshit...

Step 1. Bang head against wall.
Step 2. If head does not hurt repeat Step 1, while bitching head does not hurt.
Step 3. If head does hurt, cease head banging, while bitching head does hurt.
Step 4. Repeat Steps 1 -3 as needed.

Grrrrr
__________________
Quote:
"Yes, I am fat. Yes, I am curvy. And yes, I am beautiful. I am all of those things."
- Dot Golberg
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Doing what you like is freedom; liking what you do is happiness.
OneWickedAngel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2010, 08:48 PM   #2554
CarlaSixx
Just Another Weirdo
 
CarlaSixx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cornwall, ON, Canada
Posts: 3,983
CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by calauria View Post
Not liking the city you live is a good enough reason to prepare to leave. Obviously, the city you live in now doesn't have what you need to have the quality of life that you want. Do you want to relocate or do you want to try to make things work there?

I'm not sure how disabitlity works in Canada. But, in a larger city where you would like to live, do they offer housing for the disabled? Also, does Canada offer disability payments? And, if so, would they allow you to work part time? Maybe you can do an internet search to see what resources are available for the disabled.
I've done all types of traveling and relocating with very little money. I'm a master at it, a master at planning it. It does take a lotof planning, focus, and perserverance, but it can be done. Plus, you don't have any children, so it would be a lot easier, once you know how to do it.

Just tell me what you want to do and I can help you find a way to get there.
I am not on disability right now. I haven't gotten the complete work done and it will take 6 months to get everything done before I can apply for disability, and once I do, it takes 6 more months up to a full year before I see any results. So a year to go before I get any news about receiving disability.

They do have housing in Canada for those on disability, but it's usually REALLY bad places. They do also let people on it work up to a certain amount of money a month before they don't receive any payments, but I am medically unfit to work for maaaaany reasons, so actually getting a job is pretty much out of the question.

I don't think i'm leaving this rut anytime soon. A year or more to wait for medical stuff to go through? That's a lot like forever, and it's not a "fore sure" thing, either. There really doesn't seem to be any way out because of the chances of things going wrong are much higher than things going right.

Not only that, but I am living with a disabled mother that I'm supposed to take care of. If I leave, she gets no help, can't afford to hire help, and doesn't want forced help by the doctor's orders. She won't move out of this city, either. There's so much holding me back that I just hate it.
__________________
Curvy Canadian ;)
Twitter
My Wish List
CarlaSixx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2010, 09:31 PM   #2555
calauria
La Negra Hermosa
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Timbuktu
Posts: 1,070
calauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
I am not on disability right now. I haven't gotten the complete work done and it will take 6 months to get everything done before I can apply for disability, and once I do, it takes 6 more months up to a full year before I see any results. So a year to go before I get any news about receiving disability.

They do have housing in Canada for those on disability, but it's usually REALLY bad places. They do also let people on it work up to a certain amount of money a month before they don't receive any payments, but I am medically unfit to work for maaaaany reasons, so actually getting a job is pretty much out of the question.

I don't think i'm leaving this rut anytime soon. A year or more to wait for medical stuff to go through? That's a lot like forever, and it's not a "fore sure" thing, either. There really doesn't seem to be any way out because of the chances of things going wrong are much higher than things going right.

Not only that, but I am living with a disabled mother that I'm supposed to take care of. If I leave, she gets no help, can't afford to hire help, and doesn't want forced help by the doctor's orders. She won't move out of this city, either. There's so much holding me back that I just hate it.
There maybe free or low cost legal assistance to help you obtain the disability. I'm pretty sure you will get it, since your doctor has diagnosed that you are unfit to work. So, now this leaves you with your mom's situation. Well, you are not able to take care of your mother, either, because you too are disabled. It might be hard to break it to your mom, but you are young and you have your own life to live. So, your mom may have to accept the Doctor ordered care. Either that or she has to move with you. Do you have relatives who live in the area who can go by and check to make sure that these people are taking care of your mom properly? I'm sure you do.

The more you stay in an unhappy situation the worse it is gonna become.
__________________
I'm free to do what I want, any ole time...:p
calauria is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-09-2010, 09:42 PM   #2556
CarlaSixx
Just Another Weirdo
 
CarlaSixx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cornwall, ON, Canada
Posts: 3,983
CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by calauria View Post
There maybe free or low cost legal assistance to help you obtain the disability. I'm pretty sure you will get it, since your doctor has diagnosed that you are unfit to work. So, now this leaves you with your mom's situation. Well, you are not able to take care of your mother, either, because you too are disabled. It might be hard to break it to your mom, but you are young and you have your own life to live. So, your mom may have to accept the Doctor ordered care. Either that or she has to move with you. Do you have relatives who live in the area who can go by and check to make sure that these people are taking care of your mom properly? I'm sure you do.

The more you stay in an unhappy situation the worse it is gonna become.
We don't talk to our family. Her sister is the only family member we have in Canada besides my father and brother. My grandparents are 81 years old and my aunt is in her 60s. It's just not really possible

My brother and father don't talk to us and are too abusive to call upon. They didn't help when she had cancer, they certainly will not help now. And they didn't help when her condition first started, which is why we moved out and away from them. So they're a no-go for sure.

Getting legal assistance won't help. I'll not only have to pay it back, but I don't have on paper that I'm not able to work for 2+years. Without it saying permanently unemployable, or at least 2 years unemployable, I will not get anything. And what I would be qualifying for is still in question (BPD) because obesity and general anxiety does not make enough of an argument to qualify for disability. I am being reassessed in 6 months from now, but I may not even get the full report by then, and the decision from the doctor may be that once again, he will only write down 1 year, and not 2+ years. Which means this hoping for a break will be all in vain.
__________________
Curvy Canadian ;)
Twitter
My Wish List
CarlaSixx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 01:11 PM   #2557
luscious_lulu
Boobzilla
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 2,523
luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Carla, I'm not going to suggest any solutions, as you'll just shoot them down. All I can say is you need to work on your perspective & the way you talk to yourself. You're caught in this negative whirlwind & until you decide you are capable of changing your situation, things/you won't change. If your current doctor/therapist hasn't suggested it yet, cognitive behavior therapy would probably help.

You may think I'm a total bitch for saying it, but I believe in being honest.
luscious_lulu is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 01:45 PM   #2558
Tau
IXAMXDECADENCE
 
Tau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posts: 1,308
Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by spiritangel View Post
I am home exhausted but wired, and have lots of pics of me eating on various trains to share lol including a croissant
*SHOCK!!!HORROR!!!* You dared to eat on a train you irresponsible fatty you!!
__________________
"Happiness isn't enough! I demand euphoria!"
http://fiercefotography.blogspot.com/
Tau is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 06:09 PM   #2559
ashmamma84
Om Namah Shivayah
 
ashmamma84's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Mild Sauce City
Posts: 3,818
ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by luscious_lulu View Post
Carla, I'm not going to suggest any solutions, as you'll just shoot them down. All I can say is you need to work on your perspective & the way you talk to yourself. You're caught in this negative whirlwind & until you decide you are capable of changing your situation, things/you won't change. If your current doctor/therapist hasn't suggested it yet, cognitive behavior therapy would probably help.

You may think I'm a total bitch for saying it, but I believe in being honest.
I absolutely agree with this. If you're a total bitch that makes two of us.

Carla you are far too young to have such a cynical, negative outlook. I don't think anyone's situation is hopeless. Even if it's hard, a lot of times the attitude we take makes life and going through an already tough situation even more vapid. Instead of focusing on everything that's wrong with your life, try focusing on what's right and what you can change. It might not come to you immediately and that's okay. But to write off happiness, especially at 20, is doing yourself a big disservice.

Also, some help is better than no help at all. Even if it takes a year or two - so what? To everything there is a process; nothing is going to happen overnight so try to have some patience (this is the government after all.) So it might mean you need to start getting things in order like necessary paperwork, etc so you can get the help you need. Get the ball rolling. You aren't powerless. You can still fight the good fight. The faster you come to believe that, the better off the situation (and you) will be.
__________________
Bellydance is my religion; my body is a temple, my dance is a prayer

Last edited by ashmamma84; 08-10-2010 at 06:11 PM.
ashmamma84 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 07:44 PM   #2560
OneWickedAngel
Untamed Woman...
 
OneWickedAngel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2008
Location: Noo Yawk - Noo Yawk
Posts: 4,966
OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.OneWickedAngel has ascended what used to be the highest level.
Default

Adding my two cents to Lulu's and Ashmamma's...

Carla our attitudes on life is everything, EVERYTHING.

We won't lie, you're correct in that there are many things you won't be able to do for quite a whille, that does not mean there are not things you can't do now. It will not be the fun/good things you want to do, but welcome to the not so fun part of adulthood, honey. There are gazillions of us doing and putting up with things we don't want to do/like, just so we can get the chance to do the things we do like. The sooner you face the world and get the ball slowly rolling past the bad things, the sooner you get to the good things. But nothing is going to get rolling if you stay holed-up ensrouded in your personal pity party of all the things you can't do. Ash is right you are simply too young to be so world weary. Sorry girl, but you haven't come close to earning that mantle yet. Tap into that fearless young woman who's not afraid to face the world with with purple hair and figure out what you can do tomorrow that's will get you one step closer. Even if that only thing is filling out more paperwork.

At the core, Carla, it really is as simple as:

"If you think you can, you will and if you think you can't, you're right."
__________________
Quote:
"Yes, I am fat. Yes, I am curvy. And yes, I am beautiful. I am all of those things."
- Dot Golberg
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
Doing what you like is freedom; liking what you do is happiness.
OneWickedAngel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 07:47 PM   #2561
mszwebs
For The WIN.
 
mszwebs's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,409
mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!mszwebs keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by luscious_lulu View Post
Carla, I'm not going to suggest any solutions, as you'll just shoot them down. All I can say is you need to work on your perspective & the way you talk to yourself. You're caught in this negative whirlwind & until you decide you are capable of changing your situation, things/you won't change. If your current doctor/therapist hasn't suggested it yet, cognitive behavior therapy would probably help.

You may think I'm a total bitch for saying it, but I believe in being honest.
Quote:
Originally Posted by ashmamma84 View Post
I absolutely agree with this. If you're a total bitch that makes two of us.

Carla you are far too young to have such a cynical, negative outlook. I don't think anyone's situation is hopeless. Even if it's hard, a lot of times the attitude we take makes life and going through an already tough situation even more vapid. Instead of focusing on everything that's wrong with your life, try focusing on what's right and what you can change. It might not come to you immediately and that's okay. But to write off happiness, especially at 20, is doing yourself a big disservice.

Also, some help is better than no help at all. Even if it takes a year or two - so what? To everything there is a process; nothing is going to happen overnight so try to have some patience (this is the government after all.) So it might mean you need to start getting things in order like necessary paperwork, etc so you can get the help you need. Get the ball rolling. You aren't powerless. You can still fight the good fight. The faster you come to believe that, the better off the situation (and you) will be.

Thirded. If that were a word.

You can't just say "life sucks blah blah blah" because honestly, LIFE WILL CONTINUE TO SUCK if you only don't make some kind of change, but if you don't allow yourself to believe that change is possible.

I just posted this as my facebook status, but it certainly applies here:


We can not transform our lives if we don't want to be transformed.
__________________
Quote:
superodalisque- i want a tall venti SSBBW to go
BellaZwebs- no foam
BellaZwebs- EXTRA HOT :batting:;):batting:
Quote:
Originally Posted by bdog
...what I really mean to say is life is heart wrenchingly beautiful, unresolved, and right now...
Quote:
"That's who they're saving the country from. Me. Fat Me. I'm a terrorist and how I terrorize is by sitting next to you on a plane and throwing my flab to your knee, or some such shit"~ Kevin Smith
mszwebs is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 09:15 PM   #2562
calauria
La Negra Hermosa
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Timbuktu
Posts: 1,070
calauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
We don't talk to our family. Her sister is the only family member we have in Canada besides my father and brother. My grandparents are 81 years old and my aunt is in her 60s. It's just not really possible

My brother and father don't talk to us and are too abusive to call upon. They didn't help when she had cancer, they certainly will not help now. And they didn't help when her condition first started, which is why we moved out and away from them. So they're a no-go for sure.

Getting legal assistance won't help. I'll not only have to pay it back, but I don't have on paper that I'm not able to work for 2+years. Without it saying permanently unemployable, or at least 2 years unemployable, I will not get anything. And what I would be qualifying for is still in question (BPD) because obesity and general anxiety does not make enough of an argument to qualify for disability. I am being reassessed in 6 months from now, but I may not even get the full report by then, and the decision from the doctor may be that once again, he will only write down 1 year, and not 2+ years. Which means this hoping for a break will be all in vain.
I fourthly agree with the other ladies. Did your doctor diagnosed that you are also depressed, as well? If so, are you being treated? I'm not a doctor, but you sound really depressed and I think it is clouding your perception. You can only see the negatives. You don't even see the options you have in front of you. Which is very scary. It is very scary and dangerous to get to where you can't see hope.

Like I said, I'm not a doctor, but I think you need help with your mental state, like right now. I think you are in crisis, right now. Some people and some doctors don't take depression seriously. And, out of all the social problems there are, depression is almost always involved.
Is there a crisis line you can call?
__________________
I'm free to do what I want, any ole time...:p
calauria is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 09:44 PM   #2563
CarlaSixx
Just Another Weirdo
 
CarlaSixx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cornwall, ON, Canada
Posts: 3,983
CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I have been diagnosed with dysthymia, a type of depression, and have had the diagnosis re-assessed every year since I was 12. I am not, however, getting any treatment. Not by my choice. My doctor doesn't think meds will help, but I have been told to stay far away from alcohol, which has been difficult, but I've been doing great about that since November.

The psych I was seeing, but no longer am because I missed an appointment and am waiting to be re-added to the patient list, did not think I needed any kind of meds and wanted to take it slow. I don't outwardly show the signs of depression because I've had it for so long that I've learned how to just live with it, even if I don't want to. But I'm also not going to feign typical symptoms just to get the meds, either.

This has been a whirlwind thing for me since I was 10 years old. In and out of different treatments, and nothing helping at all. So I really don't know what can be done differently.

I know I have depression, and so does everyone who knows me, but the doctors seem to not think so.
__________________
Curvy Canadian ;)
Twitter
My Wish List
CarlaSixx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 09:54 PM   #2564
Punkin1024
Summer's already here!
 
Punkin1024's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Near Abilene, Texas, in the country. Wishing all my DIMS friends lived close by.
Posts: 6,343
Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!Punkin1024 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

IC that I may be warming up to talking on the phone! My job includes answering "tech" type questions or being a "help" line to employees at outlying branches. The past few days, I've received compliments on my voice ("I love your voice!") and my positive attitude (Hello, sunshine! and "I love it when your the one that answers the my call."). I've been working on my phone skills and these compliments have made me feel wonderful!
__________________
~Punkin

"Rainy day people don't talk, they just listen till they've heard it all." ~Rainy Day People - Gordon Lightfoot

"Use what talent you possess; the woods would be very silent if no birds sang except those that sang best." - Henry Van Dyke
Punkin1024 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 09:56 PM   #2565
calauria
La Negra Hermosa
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Timbuktu
Posts: 1,070
calauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
I have been diagnosed with dysthymia, a type of depression, and have had the diagnosis re-assessed every year since I was 12. I am not, however, getting any treatment. Not by my choice. My doctor doesn't think meds will help, but I have been told to stay far away from alcohol, which has been difficult, but I've been doing great about that since November.

The psych I was seeing, but no longer am because I missed an appointment and am waiting to be re-added to the patient list, did not think I needed any kind of meds and wanted to take it slow. I don't outwardly show the signs of depression because I've had it for so long that I've learned how to just live with it, even if I don't want to. But I'm also not going to feign typical symptoms just to get the meds, either.

This has been a whirlwind thing for me since I was 10 years old. In and out of different treatments, and nothing helping at all. So I really don't know what can be done differently.

I know I have depression, and so does everyone who knows me, but the doctors seem to not think so.
Ah!! So, this explains it all! You may need to change doctors. Ok, when you start seeing the new doctor, be assertive and more adamant about trying medication, because obviously, not being medicated has not done any good. You might have to try several to find out which works best for you. Explain your history to him/her, be assertive about that non medication has not been good, has no way helped you and that you want to try medication. Don't take no for an answer.

But, maybe to quicken up the pace, try calling the crisis hotline. I'm not sure your mental state can wait that long, since you seem to not see any hope. Have you had any suicidal thoughts?
__________________
I'm free to do what I want, any ole time...:p
calauria is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 10:03 PM   #2566
CarlaSixx
Just Another Weirdo
 
CarlaSixx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Cornwall, ON, Canada
Posts: 3,983
CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!CarlaSixx keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by calauria View Post
Ah!! So, this explains it all! You may need to change doctors. Ok, when you start seeing the new doctor, be assertive and more adamant about trying medication, because obviously, not being medicated has not done any good. You might have to try several to find out which works best for you. Explain your history to him/her, be assertive about that non medication has not been good, has no way helped you and that you want to try medication. Don't take no for an answer.

But, maybe to quicken up the pace, try calling the crisis hotline. I'm not sure your mental state can wait that long, since you seem to not see any hope. Have you had any suicidal thoughts?
Suicidal thoughts? Hmm... not as of late. Just feeling like I'm going to wither away in this place I live, but not thinking of killing myself, which is kinda new to me, lol. I think there's a crisis hotline but I don't think they can do much, really. I don't need to be hospitalized and I'm not suicidal, so they can't call up an ambulance and check me in.
__________________
Curvy Canadian ;)
Twitter
My Wish List
CarlaSixx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 10:13 PM   #2567
calauria
La Negra Hermosa
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Timbuktu
Posts: 1,070
calauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging incalauria makes people happy simply by logging in
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
Suicidal thoughts? Hmm... not as of late. Just feeling like I'm going to wither away in this place I live, but not thinking of killing myself, which is kinda new to me, lol. I think there's a crisis hotline but I don't think they can do much, really. I don't need to be hospitalized and I'm not suicidal, so they can't call up an ambulance and check me in.
Well, maybe they can be able to get your medication, sooner. Try them and see. Explain to them your history and be sure to tell them that the non medicational approach has done no good!! I mean, your doctor is not taking your condition seriously. I think you need to change doctors. Call the crisis hotline, be assertive, let them that you need help now and fast, because your condition has been neglected for far too long. No wonder you feel the way you feel.
__________________
I'm free to do what I want, any ole time...:p
calauria is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-10-2010, 10:32 PM   #2568
katherine22
 
katherine22's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Tualatin, Oregon (near Portland)
Posts: 566
katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!katherine22 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CarlaSixx View Post
Suicidal thoughts? Hmm... not as of late. Just feeling like I'm going to wither away in this place I live, but not thinking of killing myself, which is kinda new to me, lol. I think there's a crisis hotline but I don't think they can do much, really. I don't need to be hospitalized and I'm not suicidal, so they can't call up an ambulance and check me in.

There is good treatment for depression. Research shows the best treatment is a combination of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy with medication. Medication can get one over the hump but it is expensive and needs to be adjusted. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy can teach one to dispute thoughts that contribute to depression, as well as help with acceptance. There are many people who are in extreme emotional pain that live their values and have lives of meaning.
__________________
"It's absurd to divide people into good and bad. People either or charming or tedious." Oscar Wilde

Queen Elizabeth I residing within.

If I continue to eat I will grow as big as a room.
"What are rooms for?":bow:
katherine22 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 04:06 AM   #2569
LoveBHMS
default title
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 4,071
LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I'm not going to fifth or sixth this.

I'm not going to tell Carlasix to just give up, or agree with her that at 20 her life is over. On the other hand, none of us knows her or her situation, so sitting here behind the comfort of a computer screen giving advice and tossing out medical diagnoses about a situation we know nothing about is really not appropriate. Hitting somebody over the head about having a poor attitude, or insisting on a proper course of therapy for somebody you've never met is just unfair. While it is true depression can cloud judgement, she is still in the best position to asses her own situation. It seems to me at this point the most helpful thing anyone can do here is to just listen and let her know a helping hand is extended if she so wishes and to let her know help and advice are forthcoming if she wants them. For now I think we should just let her vent and offer a safe outlet for her feelings, and not possibly make her feel worse by criticizing her.
__________________
It was all very careless and confused.
LoveBHMS is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 04:49 AM   #2570
luscious_lulu
Boobzilla
 
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 2,523
luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!luscious_lulu has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

My post wasn't to beat her over the head or make her feel bad. It was about making her aware of her actions/words. I agree that the only person who can make a medical diagnosis is a doctor. Carla, can ensure that she is evaluated and if she is not happy with the diagnosis or treatment plan she can see another doctor.

Ultimately we are all responsible for our actions and our place in the world. We all have issues, but it's how we choose to act/react to what is given us. I suffer from major/chronic depression. I could sit at home and think the world cannot get better and spiral downward. I chose to get help and be proactive about my care. It wasn't easy, but I did it. Carla may not be able to work or do a myriad of other things, but she can take control of her life. She has that power. It may be scary or difficult, but she can do it.

People here have listened to her and offered support and advice. Carla keeps shooting those suggestions and ideas. I think the posts after mine are from people who care about what happens to her, but are frustrated with her view that the world sucks and there is nothing she can do about it.

Venting is fine, but when you put something out in the open you have to expect feedback. The feedback will not always be positive.

I want Carla to do well, I want her to be happy, I want her to succeed. I know to do this she needs to change the way she thinks/self talks regardless of her diagnosis. I hope she takes what has been said and uses it to help her improve her situation, not as a personal attack.

I think Carla is a good person, but she is in a bad place. Sometimes you don't realize how bad it's gotten until you are told or are given a different perspective. That was my intent.
luscious_lulu is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 04:54 AM   #2571
LoveBHMS
default title
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 4,071
LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!LoveBHMS keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I understand that, and in no way do I think anyone had ill intentions. I just think sometimes it can actually be more frustrating when people give you shit about your attitude or offer suggestions that may or may not be appropriate for your situation. I'm sure everyone means well, I'm just saying I think there are other ways to respond to her posts. She's not "shooting down" suggestions, she genuinely feels they are either not valuable or offered by people who don't know her personally or understand where she is in her life.
__________________
It was all very careless and confused.
LoveBHMS is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 04:58 AM   #2572
Aust99
Member
 
Aust99's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Oz
Posts: 2,639
Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!Aust99 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by luscious_lulu View Post
My post wasn't to beat her over the head or make her feel bad. It was about making her aware of her actions/words. I agree that the only person who can make a medical diagnosis is a doctor. Carla, can ensure that she is evaluated and if she is not happy with the diagnosis or treatment plan she can see another doctor.

Ultimately we are all responsible for our actions and our place in the world. We all have issues, but it's how we choose to act/react to what is given us. I suffer from major/chronic depression. I could sit at home and think the world cannot get better and spiral downward. I chose to get help and be proactive about my care. It wasn't easy, but I did it. Carla may not be able to work or do a myriad of other things, but she can take control of her life. She has that power. It may be scary or difficult, but she can do it.

People here have listened to her and offered support and advice. Carla keeps shooting those suggestions and ideas. I think the posts after mine are from people who care about what happens to her, but are frustrated with her view that the world sucks and there is nothing she can do about it.

Venting is fine, but when you put something out in the open you have to expect feedback. The feedback will not always be positive.

I want Carla to do well, I want her to be happy, I want her to succeed. I know to do this she needs to change the way she thinks/self talks regardless of her diagnosis. I hope she takes what has been said and uses it to help her improve her situation, not as a personal attack.

I think Carla is a good person, but she is in a bad place. Sometimes you don't realize how bad it's gotten until you are told or are given a different perspective. That was my intent.
Well said Lulu... I understood what you were saying and I think Carla did too... everyone has been so supportive...
Aust99 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 05:34 AM   #2573
Tau
IXAMXDECADENCE
 
Tau's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Johannesburg, South Africa
Posts: 1,308
Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Tau has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Punkin1024 View Post
IC that I may be warming up to talking on the phone! My job includes answering "tech" type questions or being a "help" line to employees at outlying branches. The past few days, I've received compliments on my voice ("I love your voice!") and my positive attitude (Hello, sunshine! and "I love it when your the one that answers the my call."). I've been working on my phone skills and these compliments have made me feel wonderful!
Yay you!! I love phone compliments too - specially since interacting with people on that medium isn't always the easiest and most pleasant of tasks
__________________
"Happiness isn't enough! I demand euphoria!"
http://fiercefotography.blogspot.com/
Tau is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 06:53 AM   #2574
ashmamma84
Om Namah Shivayah
 
ashmamma84's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Mild Sauce City
Posts: 3,818
ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by LoveBHMS View Post
I'm not going to fifth or sixth this.

I'm not going to tell Carlasix to just give up, or agree with her that at 20 her life is over. On the other hand, none of us knows her or her situation, so sitting here behind the comfort of a computer screen giving advice and tossing out medical diagnoses about a situation we know nothing about is really not appropriate. Hitting somebody over the head about having a poor attitude, or insisting on a proper course of therapy for somebody you've never met is just unfair. While it is true depression can cloud judgement, she is still in the best position to asses her own situation. It seems to me at this point the most helpful thing anyone can do here is to just listen and let her know a helping hand is extended if she so wishes and to let her know help and advice are forthcoming if she wants them. For now I think we should just let her vent and offer a safe outlet for her feelings, and not possibly make her feel worse by criticizing her.
No we don't know the complete ins and outs of her situation, however we do know what has been put before us and it isn't the first time. I think it's natural to want to help someone who's hurting and frankly I don't think anyone is hitting her over the head - quite the opposite. This board of fat chicks are really pretty supportive of one another so sometimes that means being told things you don't necessarily want to hear. Its entirely different from criticizing, imo. If you just want to let her vent, then do that, but don't tell the other women what they should be doing when if fact they aren't berating her and just giving her a gentle nudge to take the reigns on some things.

Also, if she doesn't want anyone to comment - I'm sure she would let everyone know. So far there has been a dialogue going on and I don't know why there would be an objection to that.
__________________
Bellydance is my religion; my body is a temple, my dance is a prayer
ashmamma84 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-11-2010, 06:53 AM   #2575
ashmamma84
Om Namah Shivayah
 
ashmamma84's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Mild Sauce City
Posts: 3,818
ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!ashmamma84 keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by luscious_lulu View Post
My post wasn't to beat her over the head or make her feel bad. It was about making her aware of her actions/words. I agree that the only person who can make a medical diagnosis is a doctor. Carla, can ensure that she is evaluated and if she is not happy with the diagnosis or treatment plan she can see another doctor.

Ultimately we are all responsible for our actions and our place in the world. We all have issues, but it's how we choose to act/react to what is given us. I suffer from major/chronic depression. I could sit at home and think the world cannot get better and spiral downward. I chose to get help and be proactive about my care. It wasn't easy, but I did it. Carla may not be able to work or do a myriad of other things, but she can take control of her life. She has that power. It may be scary or difficult, but she can do it.

People here have listened to her and offered support and advice. Carla keeps shooting those suggestions and ideas. I think the posts after mine are from people who care about what happens to her, but are frustrated with her view that the world sucks and there is nothing she can do about it.

Venting is fine, but when you put something out in the open you have to expect feedback. The feedback will not always be positive.

I want Carla to do well, I want her to be happy, I want her to succeed. I know to do this she needs to change the way she thinks/self talks regardless of her diagnosis. I hope she takes what has been said and uses it to help her improve her situation, not as a personal attack.

I think Carla is a good person, but she is in a bad place. Sometimes you don't realize how bad it's gotten until you are told or are given a different perspective. That was my intent.
This. Word for word.
__________________
Bellydance is my religion; my body is a temple, my dance is a prayer
ashmamma84 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:53 PM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright Dimensions Magazine. All rights reserved worldwide.