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Old 11-08-2011, 12:09 AM   #4351
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IC I am clueless about where I want my life to go. Most days I just want to get into my car and drive until I run out of gas.
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Old 11-08-2011, 04:28 AM   #4352
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I confess that I just broke the toilet seat at my workplace! Whoops! My first time doing it too
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Old 11-08-2011, 06:54 AM   #4353
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I confess that I'm surprised I'd ever get to today. Today is my 6-month anniversary with my boyfriend, Derek! This is definitely the longest I've dated someone... and it's been so interesting as he lives in Colorado and I live in Nebraska. But I'd say we're still going strong <3
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Old 11-08-2011, 08:02 AM   #4354
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I confess that I'm surprised I'd ever get to today. Today is my 6-month anniversary with my boyfriend, Derek! This is definitely the longest I've dated someone... and it's been so interesting as he lives in Colorado and I live in Nebraska. But I'd say we're still going strong <3
Congrats Emily! That is so awesome!!
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Old 11-08-2011, 11:36 PM   #4355
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IC that I'm rather worried about meeting Adrian's extended family after the wedding Thursday. I've grown "accustomed" to the sideways glances of strangers...but the thought of those same looks from my soon to be "family" scares me.
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Old 11-09-2011, 11:50 PM   #4356
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I confess I've never been kissed outside of an acting scene or truth or dare, and I've never gone on a date. Sad story. I'm pretty outgoing, too, so I don't know what the actual issue is.

Coming on this website makes me feel better about life, though, even though I've only been here for, like, a week
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Old 11-12-2011, 11:23 PM   #4357
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IC: That I stepped out of my physical comfort zone today, and was really glad that I did. My husband and I went to the renaissance festival, and I wanted to ride the giant swings SO bad. But the last time I had done that, I was a lot younger and a lot smaller and was worried about being able to manage getting in and out of the swing now. Well, he talked me into it, and it was awesome! After the ride was over, I just needed him and one of the strong young guys who worked the swings to pull me up. It was so not the big deal I was afraid it'd turn out to be.

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Old 11-13-2011, 01:11 AM   #4358
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IC: That I stepped out of my physical comfort zone today, and was really glad that I did. My husband and I went to the renaissance festival, and I wanted to ride the giant swings SO bad. But the last time I had done that, I was a lot younger and a lot smaller and was worried about being able to manage getting in and out of the swing now. Well, he talked me into it, and it was awesome! After the ride was over, I just needed him and one of the strong young guys who worked the swings to pull me up. It was so not the big deal I was afraid it'd turn out to be.

Tracy
Good on you, Tracy! I'm so glad to hear that. We need encouraging stories like that around here. Sounds like a really great time.
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Old 11-13-2011, 09:52 AM   #4359
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IC: That I stepped out of my physical comfort zone today, and was really glad that I did. My husband and I went to the renaissance festival, and I wanted to ride the giant swings SO bad. But the last time I had done that, I was a lot younger and a lot smaller and was worried about being able to manage getting in and out of the swing now. Well, he talked me into it, and it was awesome! After the ride was over, I just needed him and one of the strong young guys who worked the swings to pull me up. It was so not the big deal I was afraid it'd turn out to be.

Tracy
I sooooo understand this feeling- especially when I shy away from so many amusement rides my children want me to ride with them. Glad it worked out well and you had a good time
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Old 11-13-2011, 11:46 AM   #4360
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IC: That I stepped out of my physical comfort zone today, and was really glad that I did. My husband and I went to the renaissance festival, and I wanted to ride the giant swings SO bad. But the last time I had done that, I was a lot younger and a lot smaller and was worried about being able to manage getting in and out of the swing now. Well, he talked me into it, and it was awesome! After the ride was over, I just needed him and one of the strong young guys who worked the swings to pull me up. It was so not the big deal I was afraid it'd turn out to be.

Tracy
Awesome! Glad that you had a great time and did this!
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Old 11-13-2011, 03:35 PM   #4361
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IC I'm going on my first real "date" in over two years on Thursday. I'm really nervous about it. I've had the opportunity to go on dates since then, but I decided that I wasn't going to date men that didn't meet my expectations just to have a date. Anyway, after five years of doing online dating, I finally got contacted by a man who met my expectations (educated, not an atheist but not a minister, near my age). We've been talking for three weeks. He seems pretty awesome but I'm not getting my hopes up.

Anyway, I told my mom about him and then she mentioned it to my dad. After finding out that the guy is an athletic guy who runs every day, my dad said, "He knows you're not exactly skinny, right?"

And this is why I hadn't been getting my hopes up. I realize that I am an idiot and this is all my fault, but here goes... we met on OkCupid. I used to have pictures of me with my skinny friends as a body type comparison thing, but I took them down after one too many guys called me fat and then asked for "that hot blonde in the blue's" number. Men. I had planned on perhaps putting them back up with blurred out faces but hadn't gotten around to it. There was still one on there, but you couldn't really see their bodies as well (can see my large arms and a little double chin action) and we were crowded around a pizza that was half as big as a twin bed. The other photos I have are head and shoulders shots. I listed my body type as "Used Up" as I found none of the other "not skinny" descriptors fit me--not that "Used Up" does. But I never mentioned being fat explicitly.

I'm paranoid that between the pizza, my fat face and the "Used Up" he might not have gotten it and I'm going to walk away from this date and not date again for two years. Is there any way to bring this up in conversation without sounding like a total weirdo? I thought about asking him to be Facebook friends if he has Facebook where I have over 700 photos of myself, not all of them flattering (I don't always de-tag).

I don't want to get there and be disappointed and I don't want him to, either. Maybe I'm not giving him enough credit and he's not a shallow guy.


ETA: I also realize that if I were going to ask him about my fatness I should have done it before now, but I'm perfectly capable of owning that mistake.



DO IT.

How did it go?
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Old 11-14-2011, 06:12 PM   #4362
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About 12-13 weeks ago I started a diet and took up walking to get a little healthier. I was going for walks every night, and I would try and push myself to walk a little faster and a little further each time. My knees were complaining but I ignored them, telling myself that I was getting better and each wee pound that I lost would make it easier.

Then Hamish and I went away for a little trip that involved a lot of walking and scrambling in and out of buses. My right knee was in a lot of pain and each day got harder. It felt like I was starting out with my exercise all over again, when instead it should have been getting easier. On our day to fly home, I could barely put any weight on my right leg. The trip home was very difficult and at one point it hurt so much that all I could do was cry.

One week of rest and I was no better. After much reluctance and much badgering I went and had an xray which confirmed that I have severe osteoarthritis in my right knee, and I am frightened that it won't end there. The medication for my dicky knee ended up making me feel like a drunken monkey who had eaten one too many fermented bananas, and I slept constantly as a result. But it also filled my lungs with fluid that almost had me admitted into hospital last week and I'm still battling for air now as I wait for another medication to work it's magic. To make matters worse, I live with a smoker and that is a difficulty that is driving me to distraction.

I hate that I feel like a prisoner in my own body and that I am feeling it's limitations when I want to do so much right now. HATE it!!
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Old 11-15-2011, 07:36 AM   #4363
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How did it go?
Ugh, he's had to cancel twice on me because of work. Still haven't met yet.
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:22 AM   #4364
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Originally Posted by littlefairywren View Post
About 12-13 weeks ago I started a diet and took up walking to get a little healthier. I was going for walks every night, and I would try and push myself to walk a little faster and a little further each time. My knees were complaining but I ignored them, telling myself that I was getting better and each wee pound that I lost would make it easier.

Then Hamish and I went away for a little trip that involved a lot of walking and scrambling in and out of buses. My right knee was in a lot of pain and each day got harder. It felt like I was starting out with my exercise all over again, when instead it should have been getting easier. On our day to fly home, I could barely put any weight on my right leg. The trip home was very difficult and at one point it hurt so much that all I could do was cry.

One week of rest and I was no better. After much reluctance and much badgering I went and had an xray which confirmed that I have severe osteoarthritis in my right knee, and I am frightened that it won't end there. The medication for my dicky knee ended up making me feel like a drunken monkey who had eaten one too many fermented bananas, and I slept constantly as a result. But it also filled my lungs with fluid that almost had me admitted into hospital last week and I'm still battling for air now as I wait for another medication to work it's magic. To make matters worse, I live with a smoker and that is a difficulty that is driving me to distraction.

I hate that I feel like a prisoner in my own body and that I am feeling it's limitations when I want to do so much right now. HATE it!!

Lots of squishy hugs and fairy magic to you (well that little bear might have a wish or two in her you never know)

I hope you get this sorted and at least get the pain to subside I am so sorry to hear this life seems to not want people to catch a break some days

lots and lots of squishy hugs
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:39 AM   #4365
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So I'm sitting in my first class of the day. Its aural skills, so pretty much the system making all of the instrumentalists sing. Its painful.

And my ass doesn't fit in the desk. I'm more or less perched on my bum, using every muscle in my legs to not embarrass myself. Also, my stomach is taking up most of the desk. This absolutely sucks. I want to go back to my old class room or go back to bed. Or go Denver to visit Derek... And then go to bed (only with him ) haha!
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Old 11-15-2011, 11:46 AM   #4366
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Originally Posted by littlefairywren View Post
About 12-13 weeks ago I started a diet and took up walking to get a little healthier. I was going for walks every night, and I would try and push myself to walk a little faster and a little further each time. My knees were complaining but I ignored them, telling myself that I was getting better and each wee pound that I lost would make it easier.

Then Hamish and I went away for a little trip that involved a lot of walking and scrambling in and out of buses. My right knee was in a lot of pain and each day got harder. It felt like I was starting out with my exercise all over again, when instead it should have been getting easier. On our day to fly home, I could barely put any weight on my right leg. The trip home was very difficult and at one point it hurt so much that all I could do was cry.

One week of rest and I was no better. After much reluctance and much badgering I went and had an xray which confirmed that I have severe osteoarthritis in my right knee, and I am frightened that it won't end there. The medication for my dicky knee ended up making me feel like a drunken monkey who had eaten one too many fermented bananas, and I slept constantly as a result. But it also filled my lungs with fluid that almost had me admitted into hospital last week and I'm still battling for air now as I wait for another medication to work it's magic. To make matters worse, I live with a smoker and that is a difficulty that is driving me to distraction.

I hate that I feel like a prisoner in my own body and that I am feeling it's limitations when I want to do so much right now. HATE it!!
Love to you angel. I'm sending healing hugs and hopes that it doesn't turn out to be that big a problem. Hopefully with the right meds and rest it will heal up again. And I so know what you mean bout being trapped by your body. The only way I cope is to take it slowly and when something feels too sore to listen to that pain and pause *HUGZ!!!*
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:19 PM   #4367
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Originally Posted by littlefairywren View Post
About 12-13 weeks ago I started a diet and took up walking to get a little healthier. I was going for walks every night, and I would try and push myself to walk a little faster and a little further each time. My knees were complaining but I ignored them, telling myself that I was getting better and each wee pound that I lost would make it easier.

Then Hamish and I went away for a little trip that involved a lot of walking and scrambling in and out of buses. My right knee was in a lot of pain and each day got harder. It felt like I was starting out with my exercise all over again, when instead it should have been getting easier. On our day to fly home, I could barely put any weight on my right leg. The trip home was very difficult and at one point it hurt so much that all I could do was cry.

One week of rest and I was no better. After much reluctance and much badgering I went and had an xray which confirmed that I have severe osteoarthritis in my right knee, and I am frightened that it won't end there. The medication for my dicky knee ended up making me feel like a drunken monkey who had eaten one too many fermented bananas, and I slept constantly as a result. But it also filled my lungs with fluid that almost had me admitted into hospital last week and I'm still battling for air now as I wait for another medication to work it's magic. To make matters worse, I live with a smoker and that is a difficulty that is driving me to distraction.

I hate that I feel like a prisoner in my own body and that I am feeling it's limitations when I want to do so much right now. HATE it!!
Awwwwwww...((((BIG HUGS, LFW.)))) That all sounds so hard. I will hope with you that the new medicine kicks in ASAP - there is really nothing worse than feeling like your breathing is disrupted. You are well-loved in the midst of all this - hope that brings some comfort and solace during this rough period. Take care, chickadee.
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Old 11-15-2011, 02:27 PM   #4368
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My heart has been hurt so much lately that I actually feel sick to my stomach.
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Old 11-15-2011, 02:44 PM   #4369
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My heart has been hurt so much lately that I actually feel sick to my stomach.
Sounds like you need a chick flick, and a pint of full fat ice cream.
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Old 11-15-2011, 04:50 PM   #4370
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Originally Posted by 1love_emily View Post
So I'm sitting in my first class of the day. Its aural skills, so pretty much the system making all of the instrumentalists sing. Its painful.

And my ass doesn't fit in the desk. I'm more or less perched on my bum, using every muscle in my legs to not embarrass myself. Also, my stomach is taking up most of the desk. This absolutely sucks. I want to go back to my old class room or go back to bed. Or go Denver to visit Derek... And then go to bed (only with him ) haha!
Haha... any instrumental pedagogy classes are generally painful for instrumentalists to hear singers (like me) attempt.
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Old 11-15-2011, 05:14 PM   #4371
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Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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IC - I laughed when I saw this on an old boyfriends Facebook page:
"if yo thighs ain't touchin, you ain't thick enough"

My suspicions of him being a closet FA were right!
Muahahaha
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:53 PM   #4372
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PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!PunkyGurly74 has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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IC I have a job interview in the AM ...Great job, amazing pay and benefits. I really want and need this job. I am hoping for the best...:: crossing everything:: I am not sure why I have been able to not get the last few jobs I interviewed for ...I am hoping this one is better. I just really wish I had had the money to get my hair and nails done and buy new shoes and clothes...as, a job that pays this much, I do believe they do take appearance into account.....
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Old 11-15-2011, 09:01 PM   #4373
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Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!Jeeshcristina has a ton of rep. Literally. As in over 2000!
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IC I have a job interview in the AM ...Great job, amazing pay and benefits. I really want and need this job. I am hoping for the best...:: crossing everything:: I am not sure why I have been able to not get the last few jobs I interviewed for ...I am hoping this one is better. I just really wish I had had the money to get my hair and nails done and buy new shoes and clothes...as, a job that pays this much, I do believe they do take appearance into account.....
You will knock 'em dead!!!! Good luck!
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Old 11-15-2011, 11:03 PM   #4374
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bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!bigmac keeps pushing the rep limit!
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PunkyGurly74 View Post
IC I have a job interview in the AM ...Great job, amazing pay and benefits. I really want and need this job. I am hoping for the best...:: crossing everything:: I am not sure why I have been able to not get the last few jobs I interviewed for ...I am hoping this one is better. I just really wish I had had the money to get my hair and nails done and buy new shoes and clothes...as, a job that pays this much, I do believe they do take appearance into account.....

Rooting for you!!!
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Old 11-16-2011, 08:40 AM   #4375
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Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.Surlysomething has ascended what used to be the highest level.
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I don't trust anyone.



I feel so fucked up.
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