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Old 07-13-2009, 01:17 PM   #26
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Well, I joined Plenty O Fish again, we will see what happens. The good thing is it is free, so I have nothing to loose at any rate.
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Old 07-18-2009, 10:12 PM   #27
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I met my boyfriend on OasisActive (Not sure if it's only Aussie or what) - we just hit it off. I was honest about my size, and I kinda...mentioned it in conversations before we met. It hasn't been an issue, and he's attracted to me- so I don't really feel like I should keep bringing it up. lol.

The hardest part is admitting to my friends where I met him haha
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Old 07-19-2009, 07:49 AM   #28
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Default Dating Sites

duplicate post deleted - sorry!
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Old 07-19-2009, 07:52 AM   #29
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Default Dating Sites

I've tried Yahoo Personals, Cupid.com, and LargeFriends.com. Not much luck on any of them, and I've reviewed listings on other sites as well. (And it must be said that I didn't have my profile on all of the sites at the same time - I've tried each one separately over a number of years.)

The main problem I have with sites like LargeFriends.com is that they don't let you do much of anything in the way of contact (other than 1 "wink" per month per person) unless you pay for it. And almost all the profiles I viewed on that site are not paying members - so to contact them by e-mail or anything other than a wink, I have to pay for it. And it's like $30 a month!

Recently had a guy contact me via wink on LargeFriends.com, but of course, neither of us are members, so it's not going anywhere until one of us pays.

The one time I DID meet up with someone from the internet on a date, it was a nightmare. (See my thread about worst first dates...)
http://www.dimensionsmagazine.com/fo...ght=worst+date

So, back to square one.
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Old 08-11-2009, 01:18 PM   #30
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Quote:
Originally Posted by suebeehoney View Post
The main problem I have with sites like LargeFriends.com is that they don't let you do much of anything in the way of contact (other than 1 "wink" per month per person) unless you pay for it. And almost all the profiles I viewed on that site are not paying members - so to contact them by e-mail or anything other than a wink, I have to pay for it. And it's like $30 a month!

Recently had a guy contact me via wink on LargeFriends.com, but of course, neither of us are members, so it's not going anywhere until one of us pays.
Yea, I agree with you on those BBW personals sites. If you want to interact with someone, you have to pay. I'm on BBWPersonalsplus.com and have gotten several emails, but I can't even read them!! What I did is subtly add my Yahoo screenname into my profile. Some guys have gotten the "hint". Nevertheless, it sucks that there aren't any [free] personals sites specifically for BBWs.
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Old 08-23-2009, 01:15 PM   #31
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I agree with a lot of what everyone is saying -- about the pros and cons of all the various dating sites. I've tried out pretty much all of them at some point or another, and it's always lots and lots of frogs to slog through until coming upon a prince (though, I have yet to come upon a prince on a dating site!).

In terms of actually finding guys to go out with, I haven't really met many guys from any of the dating sites, bbw specific or not, even though I've paid for several of them over the years. But I have met several guys just from going into a yahoo chat room for my area, and striking up random conversations and seeing if anyone is interested in really getting to know someone, and not just casual sex. Sometimes when they see my picture they just stop talking to me, and sometimes they find me attractive; and sometimes they say something mean/negative about big girls, and sometimes not.

I actually had my profile hidden on plentyoffish for a while, but when I read this thread yesterday and saw that several people had found love with it, I made my profile visible again. I awoke today to find a message from a user telling me that I was disgusting and needed to "loose" weight (his spelling was terrible in the whole message) and how no one would ever love me and I would never be healthy enough to raise a family. Not a great way to start the morning...

So, while I actually end up finding more guys to meet up w/ who have more things in common when I am on non-bbw specific sites or chatrooms, there are times I have to put up with discouraging garbage like the random email from that jerk stranger. I guess that's one perk of being in a bbw room or site...not having to put up with that stuff.
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Old 08-25-2009, 08:16 AM   #32
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I have a profile on I think all of the bbw dating sites, and haven't had much luck with them. But, I am on tagged, and have had a few dates, I haven't met Mr. Right yet, but, that is where I have had the best luck.
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Old 08-27-2009, 11:25 AM   #33
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Default BBW dating site worked for me :)

Well I just wanted to share my experience with BBW dating sites. I was on bbpeoplemeet, bbwdatefinder, and a few others. I found some really nice guys who were actually up for getting to know you and not always focused on the size. In the end I found my boyfriend on bbpeoplemeet. He is from Ireland and it is a LDR atm, but we are making things work and planning to be together soon. Yes, sometimes you find men that are not close to you, but as I see...if you make a connection with someone, and end up falling in love, then the rest is up to how far you're willing to go to make it work. Not that it will be easy...trust me... but it depends on how far you are willing to go for someone you love.
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Old 08-27-2009, 09:02 PM   #34
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I just wanted to say I totally relate to your experience, I have found so many guys on there to be outwardly A-hole-ish. Especially when I wasn't initiating anything with them. I want to punch that guy in the face who said that to you, lol. That is unbelievable.

Quote:
Originally Posted by womanforconversation View Post
I agree with a lot of what everyone is saying -- about the pros and cons of all the various dating sites. I've tried out pretty much all of them at some point or another, and it's always lots and lots of frogs to slog through until coming upon a prince (though, I have yet to come upon a prince on a dating site!).

In terms of actually finding guys to go out with, I haven't really met many guys from any of the dating sites, bbw specific or not, even though I've paid for several of them over the years. But I have met several guys just from going into a yahoo chat room for my area, and striking up random conversations and seeing if anyone is interested in really getting to know someone, and not just casual sex. Sometimes when they see my picture they just stop talking to me, and sometimes they find me attractive; and sometimes they say something mean/negative about big girls, and sometimes not.

I actually had my profile hidden on plentyoffish for a while, but when I read this thread yesterday and saw that several people had found love with it, I made my profile visible again. I awoke today to find a message from a user telling me that I was disgusting and needed to "loose" weight (his spelling was terrible in the whole message) and how no one would ever love me and I would never be healthy enough to raise a family. Not a great way to start the morning...

So, while I actually end up finding more guys to meet up w/ who have more things in common when I am on non-bbw specific sites or chatrooms, there are times I have to put up with discouraging garbage like the random email from that jerk stranger. I guess that's one perk of being in a bbw room or site...not having to put up with that stuff.
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Old 08-27-2009, 11:55 PM   #35
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I just wanted to say I totally relate to your experience, I have found so many guys on there to be outwardly A-hole-ish. Especially when I wasn't initiating anything with them. I want to punch that guy in the face who said that to you, lol. That is unbelievable.
I know, right? Thanks for saying that! Have you been on any sites where the guys are not "outwardly A-hole-ish"?

I'm pretty much at the point, I think, where I might just forgo internet dating altogether. At least for a while.
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Old 09-03-2009, 01:45 PM   #36
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Wow, womanforconversation, what a horrible experience.

My forays into online dating have been fruitless, but at least not terribly traumatic.

Plenyoffish, not many guys contacted me, and those who did were not interesting. 'Wat up huni' is not an acceptable first message.
Craigslist, home of creeps and flakes. Though I do know people who met through it.
BBWChatzone, have chatted with a couple of guys I liked, but never went real-world sadly. There's a pall of negativity about the place too.
eHarmony and chemistry.com, too expensive and not enough interest

I've put profiles up on various dedicated bbw dating sites over the years, and I don't think there is any one of them with enough traffic to actually have justified the effort. I wish there was /one/ definitive BBW dating site. Someone tell me if I've missed a good one!

I got the most interest on OkCupid, with the most interesting guys. I kind of dig the format on there too. I am upfront about my size and have enough pics up so people don't get confused. No real luck there, but I'm vaguely optimistic still.
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Old 09-03-2009, 04:04 PM   #37
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Wow, womanforconversation, what a horrible experience.

My forays into online dating have been fruitless, but at least not terribly traumatic.

Plenyoffish, not many guys contacted me, and those who did were not interesting. 'Wat up huni' is not an acceptable first message.
Craigslist, home of creeps and flakes. Though I do know people who met through it.
BBWChatzone, have chatted with a couple of guys I liked, but never went real-world sadly. There's a pall of negativity about the place too.
eHarmony and chemistry.com, too expensive and not enough interest

I've put profiles up on various dedicated bbw dating sites over the years, and I don't think there is any one of them with enough traffic to actually have justified the effort. I wish there was /one/ definitive BBW dating site. Someone tell me if I've missed a good one!

I got the most interest on OkCupid, with the most interesting guys. I kind of dig the format on there too. I am upfront about my size and have enough pics up so people don't get confused. No real luck there, but I'm vaguely optimistic still.
Did you meet a lot of locals on OkCupid?
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Old 09-04-2009, 10:39 AM   #38
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Did you meet a lot of locals on OkCupid?
Yes! Pretty much only locals. Though I do live in LA and there is a large local population to draw on.
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Old 09-04-2009, 06:47 PM   #39
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Yes! Pretty much only locals. Though I do live in LA and there is a large local population to draw on.
Thanks....and you make a good point about location. I tend to not be the "cup of tea" for the local mentality around here often times. And....I hate the mentality so living in this area and finding a good match, aside from all the usual problems matching has, is hard.

I wonder how many closet or married guys are on those sites? What kind of ratio?

Any have any opinions/ideas about that?
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Old 09-05-2009, 01:47 AM   #40
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Thanks....and you make a good point about location. I tend to not be the "cup of tea" for the local mentality around here often times. And....I hate the mentality so living in this area and finding a good match, aside from all the usual problems matching has, is hard.
That is really tough. I've mostly lived in or around major cities, and i think sometimes numbers helps. In LA county there are 11 million people! So there has to be someone worth dating, by god.

Quote:
I wonder how many closet or married guys are on those sites? What kind of ratio?

Any have any opinions/ideas about that?
I think the closet factor is big. On okcupid there are only about 40 men on the entire site who come up with keyword search 'bbw' (not including the 'no bbw' douches). But a lot of guys contact me, so they're either closet or versatile (lol), or something. I made it clear I wasn't looking for casual sex/dating, too, and the boys seem to be trying to know me. Well, I /am/ impressed with that, cos with bbw-dedicated things, it seems to get dirty real quick with most fellas.

I'd always be wary of married/committed guys, you can't really tell until you know them well. And it is the internets, people lie.
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Old 09-05-2009, 06:06 AM   #41
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T

I think the closet factor is big. On okcupid there are only about 40 men on the entire site who come up with keyword search 'bbw' (not including the 'no bbw' douches). But a lot of guys contact me, so they're either closet or versatile (lol), or something. I made it clear I wasn't looking for casual sex/dating, too, and the boys seem to be trying to know me. Well, I /am/ impressed with that, cos with bbw-dedicated things, it seems to get dirty real quick with most fellas.

I'd always be wary of married/committed guys, you can't really tell until you know them well. And it is the internets, people lie.
Yes...I have found that letting them come to me instead of vice versa seems to work best because you just have no clue on "mixed" sites who is into what.

Also, yes, you have to be careful on the net....but that hasn't changed much from meeting in reality, methinks.
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Old 09-05-2009, 09:54 AM   #42
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Yes...I have found that letting them come to me instead of vice versa seems to work best because you just have no clue on "mixed" sites who is into what.
Unless they say something specifically *against* being with a bbw, I'm all for contacting them too - especially if it seems like we have something in common. Not that it works all the time (or even much of the time), but it's worth a shot.
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Old 09-05-2009, 11:26 AM   #43
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I have an ad of sorts on one of those sites. Had not checked it in months. I go there last night...all ' winks '. 18 people winked at me. The ones who were not 24 years old...no picture. Wtf. When I have to seriously hunker down and find me a man....I am NOT going to be a happy camper. Going to have to be something I find when I am just out and about. I want to order a man....who is inexpensive, but of high quality. Not too much to ask...right?
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Old 09-05-2009, 03:00 PM   #44
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Unless they say something specifically *against* being with a bbw, I'm all for contacting them too - especially if it seems like we have something in common. Not that it works all the time (or even much of the time), but it's worth a shot.
Actually I did contact one the other day. We had a nice conversation last night...(read he didn't immediately ask me for 800 more pics aside from the 7 I have posted on the site already, didn't ask if I had a cam, used good manners, talked about himself and his interests, is local, and seems like he is a patient man that doesn't IMMEDIATELY want to extract some promise of sex out of me when we just met), we seem to have a lot of common interests and he is messaging me again today. So yeah, that works, too, sometimes
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Old 09-05-2009, 03:04 PM   #45
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I have an ad of sorts on one of those sites. Had not checked it in months. I go there last night...all ' winks '. 18 people winked at me. The ones who were not 24 years old...no picture. Wtf. When I have to seriously hunker down and find me a man....I am NOT going to be a happy camper. Going to have to be something I find when I am just out and about. I want to order a man....who is inexpensive, but of high quality. Not too much to ask...right?

On that BBW site where they do winks, I get a lot of winks from guys from tooooo far away like Cali, Canada, Washington state, etc. I just quickly say "Thanks but the distance is too great for me" because those guys are most likely just start harrassing for nude pics or cam sessions. F*ck 'em- let them pay to get off...it's not my problem
Oh yeah, and those guys with no pictures....that's NEVER a good sign to me. And I suspect some don't post pics of themselves because they don't want their wives/girlfriends to know they are on there.......or they don't want people to see they do fatties....
I don't need a date badly enough to deal with those kinds of guys....
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Old 09-05-2009, 04:32 PM   #46
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Also, yes, you have to be careful on the net....but that hasn't changed much from meeting in reality, methinks.
Truth. I think it takes a little more energy to lie in person, plus there's all the body language/vibe stuff to go on you don't get online.

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Originally Posted by womanforconversation View Post
Unless they say something specifically *against* being with a bbw, I'm all for contacting them too - especially if it seems like we have something in common. Not that it works all the time (or even much of the time), but it's worth a shot.
Also true. I think a lot of guys are open minded. I should do it more often.

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Originally Posted by mossystate View Post
When I have to seriously hunker down and find me a man....I am NOT going to be a happy camper. Going to have to be something I find when I am just out and about. I want to order a man....who is inexpensive, but of high quality. Not too much to ask...right?
I say not too much to ask! I can order everything else online, why not a guy built to my specs?

Out and about works, it is probably the best, along with you know *exasperation* getting involved with groups and hobbies you like, blah blah. Lol.

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Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
Actually I did contact one the other day. We had a nice conversation last night...(read he didn't immediately ask me for 800 more pics aside from the 7 I have posted on the site already, didn't ask if I had a cam, used good manners, talked about himself and his interests, is local, and seems like he is a patient man that doesn't IMMEDIATELY want to extract some promise of sex out of me when we just met), we seem to have a lot of common interests and he is messaging me again today. So yeah, that works, too, sometimes
YAY! I hope it goes well! Was this on okcupid?
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Old 09-05-2009, 06:24 PM   #47
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YAY! I hope it goes well! Was this on okcupid?
No, I met him on Plenty of Fish- free

He doesn't live too far away either.
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Old 09-07-2009, 11:20 AM   #48
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No, I met him on Plenty of Fish- free

He doesn't live too far away either.
GEF did you describe yourself on plenty of fish as a BBW?
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Old 09-07-2009, 11:56 AM   #49
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GEF did you describe yourself on plenty of fish as a BBW?

Yes, that was my head line for quite awhile. "Witty, Confident BBW" or something like that. A few months ago, some guy messaged to ask what BBW meant. This lead into him saying that he preferred women that are not thin yet feels like bigger people should still be trying to lose weight, work out, etc. I pointed out his hypocrisy, he said I was being defensive, I told him he was being an asshole (eventually) after he kept messaging me when I flat out told him to leave me alone. I wound up blocking him so he cannot contact me anymore.
I kept the BBW head line until recently because I thought that being a fat woman isn't really the most important thing about me. I don't really want a guy that prefers women that must weigh XYZ and thinks it's okay to message me about how much I weigh, have more pictures, "I luvs me some big girls" type of shit. .
I have as many pictures allowed of myself up on my profile and describe myself as not thin in the option box. I don't pretend to be thin and if a man NEEDS thin then he can quickly ascertain to move on with just a look at my profile.
They can ask me more about myself if interested because I have grown weary of putting so much of myself out there, having a man "choose me" and then not even giving me the time to decide if I choose him back.
I'm going slower now......patience being key to finding what it is that *I* want.
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Old 09-07-2009, 12:59 PM   #50
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Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
Yes, that was my head line for quite awhile. "Witty, Confident BBW" or something like that. A few months ago, some guy messaged to ask what BBW meant. This lead into him saying that he preferred women that are not thin yet feels like bigger people should still be trying to lose weight, work out, etc. I pointed out his hypocrisy, he said I was being defensive, I told him he was being an asshole (eventually) after he kept messaging me when I flat out told him to leave me alone. I wound up blocking him so he cannot contact me anymore.
I kept the BBW head line until recently because I thought that being a fat woman isn't really the most important thing about me. I don't really want a guy that prefers women that must weigh XYZ and thinks it's okay to message me about how much I weigh, have more pictures, "I luvs me some big girls" type of shit. .
I have as many pictures allowed of myself up on my profile and describe myself as not thin in the option box. I don't pretend to be thin and if a man NEEDS thin then he can quickly ascertain to move on with just a look at my profile.
They can ask me more about myself if interested because I have grown weary of putting so much of myself out there, having a man "choose me" and then not even giving me the time to decide if I choose him back.
I'm going slower now......patience being key to finding what it is that *I* want.
I have made some nice friends on BBW website; however, they all live far away.
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