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Old 08-17-2009, 07:54 AM   #1
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Default Admiration vs. Objectification

After looking at some post in the BBW forums, I just got a couple of questions.

One do we still believe there is a difference between the admiration of the female form and the objectification of women? If there is, where is the line?
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Old 08-17-2009, 08:41 AM   #2
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Admiration and objectification are abstractions: they don't exist "out there" in the world; they exist in your mind. So there isn't a line at all -- unless you draw one at random.
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Old 08-17-2009, 01:33 PM   #3
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Well, I mean that since we call ourselves Fat Admirers are we encouraging objectification.

Is one good and one bad, or both bad?
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Old 08-17-2009, 02:30 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by EtobicokeFA View Post
Well, I mean that since we call ourselves Fat Admirers are we encouraging objectification.


You are if you think you are. If, in admiring a woman, you resolutely shut out any consideration of her as a person and focus only on her body, then you're objectifying her. If you are considerate of her feelings, offering friendship and respect, then you are not.
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Old 08-17-2009, 03:23 PM   #5
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Old 08-17-2009, 05:18 PM   #6
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Admiration often emotion in describing one's being.

"I admire her honesty."

In our group, admiration can be anything from liking someone's smile, to bowing their head in reverence to a fat belly.

That said, I agree with Dr. Feelgood that it's only objectification if you think in your own mind it is.
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Old 08-17-2009, 05:52 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by Dr. Feelgood View Post
You are if you think you are. If, in admiring a woman, you resolutely shut out any consideration of her as a person and focus only on her body, then you're objectifying her. If you are considerate of her feelings, offering friendship and respect, then you are not.
I tend to agree....

There is a huge difference in a guy that likes me as a person and my boobs and guy that just likes my boobs.
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Old 08-17-2009, 11:00 PM   #8
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Originally Posted by Dr. Feelgood View Post
You are if you think you are. If, in admiring a woman, you resolutely shut out any consideration of her as a person and focus only on her body, then you're objectifying her. If you are considerate of her feelings, offering friendship and respect, then you are not.
Beautifully put.
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Old 08-19-2009, 04:56 AM   #9
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Originally Posted by EtobicokeFA View Post
Well, I mean that since we call ourselves Fat Admirers are we encouraging objectification.

Is one good and one bad, or both bad?
If you are differentiating between admiration and objectification, how does the term Fat Admirers encourage objectification? Wouldn't it encourage admiration rather than objectification?

Some people may not recognize a difference between the two, but the difference exists. Objectification is separating a person's physical attributes from the whole person and treating the physical body as a mere object.

Don't be a FO (Fat Objectifyer).
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Old 08-19-2009, 08:07 AM   #10
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Originally Posted by Duniwin View Post
If you are differentiating between admiration and objectification, how does the term Fat Admirers encourage objectification? Wouldn't it encourage admiration rather than objectification?

Some people may not recognize a difference between the two, but the difference exists. Objectification is separating a person's physical attributes from the whole person and treating the physical body as a mere object.

Don't be a FO (Fat Objectifyer).
Well, after listen to a lot people who could not recognize the difference, I just wanted make sure there still was!

Thank you all for reassuring my faith that there is!
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Old 08-19-2009, 02:13 PM   #11
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Originally Posted by Duniwin View Post
If you are differentiating between admiration and objectification, how does the term Fat Admirers encourage objectification? Wouldn't it encourage admiration rather than objectification?

Some people may not recognize a difference between the two, but the difference exists. Objectification is separating a person's physical attributes from the whole person and treating the physical body as a mere object.

Don't be a FO (Fat Objectifyer).
That's dangerously close to F*** off. Isn't that interesting?
Remember kids: Don't be a F*** off. lol
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Old 08-19-2009, 03:59 PM   #12
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If one can only see a woman as a source of pleasure and nothing more without consideration for her feelings and her desires ... thats objectification ...

but i am restating what was already stated on the board
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Old 08-19-2009, 04:23 PM   #13
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I tend to agree....

There is a huge difference in a guy that likes me as a person and my boobs and guy that just likes my boobs.
You must spread some reputation around before giving it to Green Eyed Fairy again.

Can somebody rep her here, please?
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Old 08-24-2009, 06:39 AM   #14
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That's dangerously close to F*** off. Isn't that interesting?
Remember kids: Don't be a F*** off. lol
I think that's a good message as well.
Also, I was pronouncing FO like "foo," as in "I pity the FO."
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Old 08-25-2009, 03:04 PM   #15
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I think everyone is going to have a different standard for when they feel objectified versus admired, so it's hard to really pinpoint when one turns into the other.

I feel objectified when someone treats me in a way that makes me feel like they only regard me as a means to an end. Sexual objectification is a good example (especially relevant on a site like this, where the mutual interest that brings us all together is a certain kind of body), but it certainly extends to other areas.
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Old 10-11-2009, 11:09 AM   #16
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Have you ever been on youtube??!! The comments people leave on the BBW/SSBBW vids... they can be anywhere from "I want to f*** that... she makes me hard" to "I want a girlfriend or wife like that... she looks sweet". Of course I also sometimes want to write to the women and say, you are worth more than that stop making yourself an OBJECT only! They are just as guilty.

All the people who leave the "sex" only comments I would say are FO's and truthfully I find it disgusting! It is no different than men who look at thin women and say the same. No one (in my opinion) should be just an object of "getting off". They are people and should be respected, loved, cared for. But again, like I said, if you put yourself out there to be just an OBJECT, whose fault is it really??!!

Now if you love/care about someone as a person and show them respect AND you can't wait to get their clothes off... this is A-OK in my book
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Old 10-11-2009, 02:05 PM   #17
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Originally Posted by EtobicokeFA View Post
After looking at some post in the BBW forums, I just got a couple of questions.

One do we still believe there is a difference between the admiration of the female form and the objectification of women? If there is, where is the line?
As a conventionally sized FFA who has been objectified most of my life, I DO have moral issues about how I admire, crave, and perhaps objectify my BHM. No answers tho'...
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Old 10-12-2009, 08:24 AM   #18
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Originally Posted by EtobicokeFA View Post
After looking at some post in the BBW forums, I just got a couple of questions.

One do we still believe there is a difference between the admiration of the female form and the objectification of women? If there is, where is the line?
There's probably as many answers as there are women who feel either admired or objectified. And the overall dynamic of females trying to look pretty and attractive while at the same time not wishing to be objectified is hugely complex.
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Old 10-14-2009, 09:45 AM   #19
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What Conrad said. In spades.

Meanwhile..I will say this: I objectify strangers all the time, said the fat girl.

I mean...I have huge, huge lust for the pretty boy who plays Clark/Cal on Smallville. I don't want him for his mind, or conversation... what little of it I have experienced is far from stimulating. I want him naked, and aroused, and silent, except for grunts of pleasure in my general direction, thanks.

He will never know me...so I can do this with moral freedom.

We all objectify strangers. Human nature. I don't think anyone should feel bad about that....its just when people get so desensitized to the fact that there IS a person there....and they CAN experience your objectification through your behavior...in anything from comments on a video to the most extreme... treating fat women as "FAT TO PLAY WITH WHEE!" first...and not as a person.


I'm not saying anything new here.

Just wanted to jump in because I am admiring this thread and others in the FA forum.

heh...admiring.
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Old 10-14-2009, 12:21 PM   #20
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Conrad, concise and right on, I think.

Arv, I agree that we do all objectify and I think it is, in general, a natural function of attraction. I think it becomes a problem when it becomes an inappropriate fixation when relating and communicating to the opposite sex -- unless it's within a venue that is set up for that.

A also agree regarding Tom Welling. Yum.
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Old 10-14-2009, 03:25 PM   #21
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I admit I've never really understood the objectification issue/argument/problem. We all objectify other people all the time -- and I question the veracity of anyone who says otherwise. This is not a bad thing. What harm is there in thinking that the girl walking down the hall has a nice bottom or that the guy working on the house next door has nice muscular arms. Last year the fire department had to respond to my house -- I'll let you imagine how much objectification my 19 year old daughter and her friends were doing when four young hot firemen came in the front door.

Indeed lots -- if not most -- relationships start out because one person finds the other physically attractive and initiates contact. The only exception I can think of would be a truly blind date (i.e. not even a profile photo).


Quote:
Originally Posted by Green Eyed Fairy View Post
There is a huge difference in a guy that likes me as a person and my boobs and guy that just likes my boobs.

So the guy who likes you and your boobs was likely formerly a guy who just liked your boobs.

There's nothing wrong with this so long as both people can move beyond the purely physical.
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Old 10-14-2009, 03:58 PM   #22
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Indeed lots -- if not most -- relationships start out because one person finds the other physically attractive and initiates contact. The only exception I can think of would be a truly blind date (i.e. not even a profile photo).


So the guy who likes you and your boobs was likely formerly a guy who just liked your boobs.

There's nothing wrong with this so long as both people can move beyond the purely physical.
Yes, but I feel differently about the guy that likes me for myself and the boobs.....there is a distinct, easily detectable difference in behaviors.

The biggest difference in men that objectify and men that are just first physically attracted to boobage? The first type never look past the boobs....they talk to the boobs and only think about the boobs.

Intent and awareness is the difference in my encounters with men.
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Old 10-15-2009, 02:05 AM   #23
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I say objectify me all you want from a distance and within the bounds of the law. (Pronouns used rhetorically.)

Just don't approach me as a stranger and try to get me to cooperate with you in my own de-humanization.

The irony of a human being coming face to face with another, out of the blue, expecting her to collude in her own objectification, no questions asked... You know darn well that this stuff doesn't fly between ordinary people. It's one thing to let your mind get carried away from a distance because you think I have a nice behind, and quite another to approach me and describe what you're thinking. I don't know you from Adam.

The "objectification" that's attributed to sexual attraction between couples is never a matter of objectification, since presumably it doesn't take place outside of a context of intimacy (however nascent) and mutual consent (however hasty). The presence of intimacy and consent implies that everyone's humanity has factored in to individual and mutual satisfaction, at least for the moment.

No. Merely feeling an attraction for someone does not equate "objectification." IT's when we treat people as objects with no possibility of their being treated as anything more that we objectify them.

Those who actively put themselves "out there" for objectification, I expect, have their own motives and reasons. And who am I to question those? Live and let live.

So long as no stranger expects me to behave like I've already de facto given consent to be objectified, up close and personal, we should all be fine.
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Last edited by Fascinita; 10-15-2009 at 02:25 AM.
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Old 10-15-2009, 06:17 AM   #24
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Well....That was perfectly expressed, Fascinita..

One could even say.. your right to use me as sexual fodder without my consent ends the moment you make me aware of you in any way.


That's about it for me.

Problem is...the pseudo anonymity of the internets makes people do the equivalent of picking their nose while driving....they think they can't be seen, so they act gross. There are still consequences to commentary....

I won't get into ...won't even touch, the other side of this... people who create what's being reacted to.... "sexual-esque" video, etc...any time I have even suggested that there might maybe possibly kinda sorta might be an aspect of ....self induced humiliation...involved...on occasion...possibly...when someone puts up suggestive video, for example....I get slammed as the worse sort of prude...so. Me no touch.
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Old 10-15-2009, 06:39 AM   #25
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Assuming that can also apply to female FA/male bodies, I'm going to have to go with....does this matter?

It kind of seems like the whole fetish/preference argument. I mean isn't a lot of this just semantics anyway? Like if somebody said to me "Oh, you're not a female fat admirer, you're a female fat objectifier" I would be like "Ok...fine...call it what you want."
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