Dimensions Forums  
Home Register Premium Membership Stories Ye Olde Library Health Issues Market Place Big Fashion
Old 08-24-2009, 01:19 PM   #1
mergirl
 
mergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,927
mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default Bdsm

I was going to wait till i got my pics back before i posted this but ..och well its a good talking point anyway and the pics can come later!
I went to my first BDSM night a few weeks ago and i thought the atmosphere was AMAZING!

1. It was totally queer friendly:I was kissing my lady without even a murmur and i saw other girls kissing and a couple of gay guys. I really loved the freedom of that. (i am thinking there is a lot more queer acceptance on the s n m scene- My lesbian friend was chattering up a woman who said "Well i'm not queer but you are totally cute and i would totally be up for a spanking session with you)

2. It was SO fat friendly. My gf said she didn't feel uncomfortable at all.. and there were a LOT of subs who were totally loving on her! It seems a lot of subs love the big ladies. Also i saw many guys in pvc shorts with very ample beer guts hanging over. Very nice (though in scotland everyone has a beer gut.. i'm just not used to them hanging over pvc shorts! )

3. There were a so many trans people there. Transvestites and also transexuals (as i found out by chattering to them). It seems that bdsm clubs (here at least) are very open to trans people. It was Fab cause i walked into a room where there was music playing and it was pretty much all trans folk! I loves me my trans folk.. i was so happy.

Anyway, there are three reasons why i loved my first bdsm club experience! I'm not much of a bdsm'er though i guess i am a switch but i will defo be going back to that club as it was Fat, gay and trans friendly..which was so lovely!
Pics will come soon.
Every one else..post your bdsm experiences, stories, pics!!
__________________
We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, thereby to become a participant in its evil. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
mergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-25-2009, 12:30 PM   #2
olwen
Disco Bear
 
olwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: nyc
Posts: 6,966
olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Great idea for a thread. I wouldn't even know where to start. LOL I have found that in general there is a less *openly* judgmental atmosphere when it comes to body types and sexualities. There are people who will want to do a scene with me regardless of whether or not I am their type and vice versa just because it is an opportunity to play and perhaps practice their skills with a whip, paddle, cane, or whatever. I am always surrounded by people so safety isn't something I have to worry about, plus I get to make all the loud crazy noises I want. If something went wrong everyone in the vicinity would come to my aid, which has happened. I was glad there were people there to help me too. There are people who do express some disgust at gay pairs/groups but those people are told to just exercise some respect or they will get kicked out. Anyone who doesn’t follow the club’s rules gets kicked out. I find it’s in the online world where people are the most judgmental and rude.
olwen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-25-2009, 07:56 PM   #3
Christina416
 
Christina416's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Jersey Shore
Posts: 72
Christina416 has said some nice things
Default

In my early 30's I used to go to the Hellfire club in NYC. Friends and I just went one night just to kinda goof around, but Iloved the place and would go back frequently. I found the world of BDSM very intriguing (SP?) and I still do, even though I am not involved in the lifestyle. I use to just sit there for hours and watch couples or groups do their scenes. Everyone was always so open, friendly and respectful. Quite a few times I was approached and asked if I play or if I was in the lifestyle, and when I said no they understood. One gentleman came back and said " you know, you really are part of the lifestyle,..Vouyerism, you are a vouyer" I just replied so be it!
The Hellfire club is no longer there But There is a place in Brooklyn called The Fetish Warehouse, that I have yet to go to. Hmmmm, maybe that can be a trip for this weekend
Christina416 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-25-2009, 08:15 PM   #4
knottedsouls
Organized Chaos
 
knottedsouls's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Pittsburgh
Posts: 42
knottedsouls can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesknottedsouls can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default :)

Locally, there have been a few clubs that have done fetish night events that I've been too( heck, I held a monthly fetish night at a local club for over a year, some time back) I have always felt welcomed at all of them and they have always been diverse and friednly overall.

I remember the first munch event ( monthly fetish workshop etc) I ever attended. I felt so self concious (sp?) going,( which at the time was pretty normal for me) but my ex partner and I had a Dom, and he wanted us to check it out. I had noticed that there were people of all shapes, sizes, definitions there and it was really laid back. There was a workshop on spanking that I was interested in goign to. I was so floored when I walked in and the demo was being given by a male Dom, female sub and the female sub was an large pear shaped woman, almost exactly like myself. She looked so pretty up there and so comfortable with herself...Ill never forget that...

Gosh...I havent been to a munch in ages or to a fetish even for that matter...Ill have to fix that soon...
__________________
Some days it doesnt pay to chew through the restraints ...:D other days, I'd pay to be restrained. :bounce:
knottedsouls is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2009, 02:44 AM   #5
mergirl
 
mergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,927
mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by olwen View Post
Great idea for a thread. I wouldn't even know where to start. LOL I have found that in general there is a less *openly* judgmental atmosphere when it comes to body types and sexualities. There are people who will want to do a scene with me regardless of whether or not I am their type and vice versa just because it is an opportunity to play and perhaps practice their skills with a whip, paddle, cane, or whatever. I am always surrounded by people so safety isn't something I have to worry about, plus I get to make all the loud crazy noises I want. If something went wrong everyone in the vicinity would come to my aid, which has happened. I was glad there were people there to help me too. There are people who do express some disgust at gay pairs/groups but those people are told to just exercise some respect or they will get kicked out. Anyone who doesnít follow the clubís rules gets kicked out. I find itís in the online world where people are the most judgmental and rude.
Ahh.. i have never been on any online bdsm groups though i have friends who are on one called 'informed consent'. I think its good that there are rules enforced so that queer people don't get hassle.. So that even if there are people who have a problem with you they don't get to spread thier shit. (hmm..go away imagary! ). I think it also must be nice to feel safe there. I never 'played' cause i'm not so into it that i think i would want to..hmm well maby to try though i did like watching, so hellz maby i'm a voyour...
There was a strange piece of apperatus there which i had never seen before and it was kinna like a crucifix that people were tied too and a small rope came out between thier legs and a guy at the end of the rope kinna jiggled it so that it must have been vibrating and giving someone clitoral stimulation. I never knew that this kinna thing would be a part of the s n m equipment. It was cool because one of the people on the recieving end was a girl who was maby a bit bigger than Beth Ditto, in just her underwear. She seemed totally comfortable and people watching seemed very interested and turned on. I was going to say.. you dont see that in 'normal' clubs.. i mean big women in underwear being either worshipped or pleasured, but then i guess you dont see people crucified either! It felt very liberating. Though, funny enough, i sort of lost my fa identity for the night somehow. hmmm..
__________________
We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, thereby to become a participant in its evil. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
mergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2009, 02:51 AM   #6
mergirl
 
mergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,927
mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Christina416 View Post
In my early 30's I used to go to the Hellfire club in NYC. Friends and I just went one night just to kinda goof around, but Iloved the place and would go back frequently. I found the world of BDSM very intriguing (SP?) and I still do, even though I am not involved in the lifestyle. I use to just sit there for hours and watch couples or groups do their scenes. Everyone was always so open, friendly and respectful. Quite a few times I was approached and asked if I play or if I was in the lifestyle, and when I said no they understood. One gentleman came back and said " you know, you really are part of the lifestyle,..Vouyerism, you are a vouyer" I just replied so be it!
The Hellfire club is no longer there But There is a place in Brooklyn called The Fetish Warehouse, that I have yet to go to. Hmmmm, maybe that can be a trip for this weekend
Quote:
Originally Posted by knottedsouls View Post
Locally, there have been a few clubs that have done fetish night events that I've been too( heck, I held a monthly fetish night at a local club for over a year, some time back) I have always felt welcomed at all of them and they have always been diverse and friednly overall.

I remember the first munch event ( monthly fetish workshop etc) I ever attended. I felt so self concious (sp?) going,( which at the time was pretty normal for me) but my ex partner and I had a Dom, and he wanted us to check it out. I had noticed that there were people of all shapes, sizes, definitions there and it was really laid back. There was a workshop on spanking that I was interested in goign to. I was so floored when I walked in and the demo was being given by a male Dom, female sub and the female sub was an large pear shaped woman, almost exactly like myself. She looked so pretty up there and so comfortable with herself...Ill never forget that...

Gosh...I havent been to a munch in ages or to a fetish even for that matter...Ill have to fix that soon...
Cool! Munch and Hellfire must be worldwide names because i have heard my friends talking about munch and i just realised i actually Kinna went to a 'hellfire' night about 10 years ago. I don't count it as my first bdsm night because my band were playing in another room and then i got chatting to the guy who ran it who said i could come in and have a look. My bassist pretended to be my gf to come in and 'rescue' me...and i was licking a boot apparently! I was very young and very drunk!
Well, that was the last time i ever licked a boot, though i have licked a book strangely enough! I had forgotten about that until then..i was only there for 10 mins so i don't really count it as going to my first real club.
__________________
We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, thereby to become a participant in its evil. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
mergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2009, 03:45 AM   #7
Emma
On Timeout
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 3,865
Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!Emma keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

I wish there was one here in Stoke. I went to a few when I was younger but I'm well up for going back now I'm more sure with my sexuality.

ETA: You've inspired me to find one that is nearby to us. There is one in Manchester so I'm gonna go on the 9th eeeeeee

Last edited by Emma; 08-26-2009 at 03:59 AM.
Emma is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2009, 02:53 PM   #8
bexy
is red again <3
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 4,850
bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!bexy keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Sounds awesome Mer. I have always wanted to go to one, unfortunately there arent any in Northern Ireland (what a surprise lol!!) as we know George could dress how he wanted and feel comfortable. There is one in Dublin, we just need to try to get organised to go as its quite far. Can't wait to see your pics!
__________________
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

With loves, and hates, and passions just like mine.
bexy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-26-2009, 04:05 PM   #9
olwen
Disco Bear
 
olwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: nyc
Posts: 6,966
olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by mergirl View Post
Ahh.. i have never been on any online bdsm groups though i have friends who are on one called 'informed consent'. I think its good that there are rules enforced so that queer people don't get hassle.. So that even if there are people who have a problem with you they don't get to spread thier shit. (hmm..go away imagary! ). I think it also must be nice to feel safe there. I never 'played' cause i'm not so into it that i think i would want to..hmm well maby to try though i did like watching, so hellz maby i'm a voyour...
There was a strange piece of apperatus there which i had never seen before and it was kinna like a crucifix that people were tied too and a small rope came out between thier legs and a guy at the end of the rope kinna jiggled it so that it must have been vibrating and giving someone clitoral stimulation. I never knew that this kinna thing would be a part of the s n m equipment. It was cool because one of the people on the recieving end was a girl who was maby a bit bigger than Beth Ditto, in just her underwear. She seemed totally comfortable and people watching seemed very interested and turned on. I was going to say.. you dont see that in 'normal' clubs.. i mean big women in underwear being either worshipped or pleasured, but then i guess you dont see people crucified either! It felt very liberating. Though, funny enough, i sort of lost my fa identity for the night somehow. hmmm..
Mer, the great thing about SM is that *anything* can be used as an implement of torture. The only problem with equipment when it comes to fat folks is worrying about it being sturdy. I've been 100% nude in my local club more than once. Nobody has ever batted an eye. If someone is grossed out, I'm too into whatever I'm doing to care, and so is the person I'm with, in which case I wouldn't have noticed. In a lot of ways a person's bdsm skills are way more important than looks or gender I think.
olwen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-27-2009, 03:43 AM   #10
mergirl
 
mergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,927
mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by CurvyEm View Post
I wish there was one here in Stoke. I went to a few when I was younger but I'm well up for going back now I'm more sure with my sexuality.

ETA: You've inspired me to find one that is nearby to us. There is one in Manchester so I'm gonna go on the 9th eeeeeee
oooh Fab! I imagine the Manchester clubs will be amazing!! You need to post pics of your outfit!

Quote:
Originally Posted by bexy View Post
Sounds awesome Mer. I have always wanted to go to one, unfortunately there arent any in Northern Ireland (what a surprise lol!!) as we know George could dress how he wanted and feel comfortable. There is one in Dublin, we just need to try to get organised to go as its quite far. Can't wait to see your pics!
Yeah, Northern island isn't exactly the safe haven for sexual liberation, as i found out when i bought a vibrator in the first sex shop and everyone quite literally thought i was mental!
Well, the one in Glasgow is on the 1st of every month, so you guys should totally come through for one. I know loads of folks you could crash with and also there are loads of cheap b n b's here. I also know a lot of reliable Baby sitters were you to bring *** along. (Didn't know if you had said her name on here yet! ). Trying to get Cors to come along to one too.. maby we could try to co-ordinate!
__________________
We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, thereby to become a participant in its evil. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
mergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-27-2009, 03:55 AM   #11
mergirl
 
mergirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Scotland
Posts: 6,927
mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!mergirl keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by olwen View Post
In a lot of ways a person's bdsm skills are way more important than looks or gender I think.
I never really thought about bdsm 'skills'. Do people get a rep for being good at spanking etc? I can imagine people would get a bad rep pretty quickly if they were too harsh or something and didn't listen to what people wanted. I quite like the fact that somehow looks are secondary, its very liberating. I kinna like the idea of wearing a gimp mask because i like the idea of annonimity (I'm not really sure why!) though GD thinks they look a bit creepy.
I would say i also enjoy spanking but not as a means of corporal punishment, more as a way to relieve stress. I think spanking works better than vallium for anxiety..must be something to do with endorphins or something..but afterwards i feel very chilled.
Haha.. i just realised, i'm always saying "yeah..i'm not totally 'Into' s n m" and then i'm like "Yeah i love getting spanked and want to wear a gimp mask"!! hahaha.. Its for different reasons though..hmm maby that doesn matter..
Hmmmm....
__________________
We must learn that to passively accept an unjust system is to cooperate with that system, thereby to become a participant in its evil. -Martin Luther King, Jr.
mergirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-27-2009, 04:16 PM   #12
StarWitness
part square, part drape
 
StarWitness's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Sexcriminalboat
Posts: 692
StarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions communityStarWitness is a pillar of the Dimensions community
Default

I dabbled in the fetish scene a bit when I was 19-20, and I found it to be very friendly and open to all sorts of people. I've been sort of dipping my toe back into that pool lately; I went to my local much last month and out of the dozen or so people who attended, there was maybe one or two people who I wouldn't have labelled as fat. So that made me feel a bit more comfortable... although I was easily the youngest person there, which was kinda sucky.

On a sort of related note, when I go clubbing with my friends, we always go to "alternative" night clubs (aka goth/industrial). I was out at one last night, and looking around, I realized that there was a pretty diverse group of people there: all different fashions, body types, ages, races, genders, sexualities... everyone just wanted to flail around to angry German music. It gave me a warm fuzzy feeling.
__________________
Oh yeah, like the people of New Jersey have never seen a fat guy and a chick make out. It's on the freaking state flag. --Homer Simpson

I've always been a guy with a sweet tooth, and that girl's just like a king-size candy bar...
--Sleater-Kinney
StarWitness is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 08-27-2009, 05:27 PM   #13
olwen
Disco Bear
 
olwen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: nyc
Posts: 6,966
olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!olwen keeps pushing the rep limit!
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by mergirl View Post
I never really thought about bdsm 'skills'. Do people get a rep for being good at spanking etc? I can imagine people would get a bad rep pretty quickly if they were too harsh or something and didn't listen to what people wanted. I quite like the fact that somehow looks are secondary, its very liberating. I kinna like the idea of wearing a gimp mask because i like the idea of annonimity (I'm not really sure why!) though GD thinks they look a bit creepy.
I would say i also enjoy spanking but not as a means of corporal punishment, more as a way to relieve stress. I think spanking works better than vallium for anxiety..must be something to do with endorphins or something..but afterwards i feel very chilled.
Haha.. i just realised, i'm always saying "yeah..i'm not totally 'Into' s n m" and then i'm like "Yeah i love getting spanked and want to wear a gimp mask"!! hahaha.. Its for different reasons though..hmm maby that doesn matter..
Hmmmm....
You can get a rep for many different things....it's a complicated world with lots of rules...how well you use a paddle or a whip is just one aspect of one's rep. How you treat other people matters more. Anyone who lacks respect or is self-centered really won't get very far in the bdsm community.

Spanking is it's own thing, and there are people who are into spanking but not the BDSM aspects of it. They just want to be spanked and nothing more. So a spanking as a form of punishment is just one thing about it. Spankings are my favorite and I approach it the same way you probably do. It is a way to relieve stress as it puts me into a meditative state (subspace). I'm not into being bratty, so a spanking as a punishment wouldn't do anything for me. It would be more of a punishment for me to be denied one in the first place.

Again, everybody is different so you'd likely get a slightly different opinion from different people.
olwen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2009, 04:27 AM   #14
strangeangel
Lady Strange
 
strangeangel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Harry's Hell (Singapore)
Posts: 123
strangeangel can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokesstrangeangel can now be the recipient of "two cans" jokes
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Christina416 View Post
One gentleman came back and said " you know, you really are part of the lifestyle,..Vouyerism, you are a vouyer" I just replied so be it!
Y'know, I never knew voyeurism was/is considered part of the lifestyle, and I am now pleased as punched to know that it is. :P
__________________
"All truths go through 3 stages; it is ridiculed, it is violently opposed, and finally it is accepted as self-evident.":bow:
strangeangel is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 07:33 AM.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Copyright Dimensions Magazine. All rights reserved worldwide.